A/N: double update~~ >•<
~ Seungmin Pov.
I had to get away. Away from Hyunjin, away from everything that caused me so much pain.
After that stupid fight at the party with Hyunjin, nothing was the same anymore.
Flashback
"And why do you care so much?!" I yelled at the already drunk blond-haired man standing in the middle of the room, his hand clenched into a fist.
"I don't!" Hyunjin hissed while crossing his arms as I lost all understanding.
He was the one who had yelled at me earlier about why this girl had kissed me when I didn't even want to. None of that.
"If that's all, I'm leaving." I snorted annoyed, about to walk past Hyunjin towards the door when he suddenly grabbed me by the wrist and stopped me from leaving, pulling me back.
I stumbled back a few steps since Hyunjin hadn't pulled me back gently.
"What the-" before I could even start yelling at this stupid ferret, he walked towards me with quick steps, pushed me towards the bed which was behind us and threw me on the bed.
He placed his arms to the left and right of my head while kneeling with one leg between my legs. Hyunjin was so close to me that I could feel his warm breath against my skin. He smelled extremely of alcohol, yet you could still smell his own scent. I hated myself for it but I loved the smell of Hyunjin more than I should.
His scent was just so pleasant and light and caused a flurry of butterflies in my stomach every time. Although I tried to hate this guy as much as I could, I could not. The feelings I had for him were just too strong and I was too weak to stop them.
Sooner or later I would break down and finally let go of all these pent up feelings inside me.
"G-get off of me..." I braced my hands against his strong chest and tried to push him off me but I couldn't - I was too weak.
I felt my heart begin to race and a lump began to form in my throat.
Hyunjin's closeness was driving me crazy!
I didn't want to feel this way, I never did.
Hyunjin would never return my feelings but would only tease me with his stupid flirting attempts and tear my heart into a thousand pieces. For him it was all just a game but for me it was much more than that.
"You're killing me..." suddenly Hyunjin muttered something and I looked at him from wide eyes.
Stunned, I pushed him off of me and he looked at me out of wide-eyed as he stumbled a few steps into the room.
"I'm killing you?!" I yelled, repeating his muttered words from earlier.
"Do you have any idea what you're doing to me?!" I continued to scream in his face, noticing tears forming in my eyes and my throat starting to burn.
Was he fucking serious?!
"You have no idea-" that's as far as I got when out of nowhere Hyunjin stood right in front of me, took my face in his hands and pressed his lips against mine from the next moment to the next.
Completely caught off guard, I stumbled back a few steps, tripping over the edge of the bed and landing back on the bed.
Hyunjin had not broken the kiss and was still moving his lips on mine.
Slowly, I returned the kiss and moved my lips rhythmically to his.
His thumb drew small circles on my cheek while he ran his other hand through my hair.
Fireworks of emotions exploded inside me and I forgot how to breathe in a moment. The only thing I felt was the moist warmth of Hyunjin's lips and his warm hand still resting on my cheek.
Full of passion he kissed me, running his tongue over my lower lip again and again, deepening the kiss greedily. Uncertainly I opened my lips and as if on command Hyunjin let his tongue slide in.
With every second the kiss became stronger, more passionate.
I never wanted this moment to end, never wanted to forget the feeling of his lips on mine and how the sweet taste of his lips transported me to heaven.
As we both slowly ran out of air, Hyunjin moved away from me, looking at me with wide eyes.
His cheeks were slightly flushed while his lips were swollen from the intimate kiss.
He panicked and moved away from me as if he had just realized what had happened.
"I-I'm sorry." he stammered, and I slowly struggled to my feet. Panic spread through me. Panic that he would walk through the door now and all of this would be forgotten.
And my fear came true.
From one second to the other he ran out of the room without giving me another look.
I noticed how slowly but surely individual tears left my eyes and sought their way towards the bed sheets.
Flashback End
"You stupid idiot!" sourly I kicked the nearest locker as I stopped in the middle of the hallway.
As if this leaving at the party wasn't bad enough this idiot couldn't even remember the night because he was so drunk and that had given me the rest.
That was also the reason why I collapsed the day Felix and Jisung saw me.
Hyunjin had seriously told me to my face that he didn't feel anything for me and would never kiss me even when he was drunk.
He just wouldn't admit what he had done that night after I told him about it.
"Seungmin!"
I winced as I heard a familiar voice echoing through the school hallway.
My body tensed and I didn't turn in his direction.
I didn't want to see him. No.
"Seungmin..." I felt a heavy breathing body come to a stop beside me but I showed no reaction.
But when I noticed a hand on my shoulder, I slapped it away.
These hands would never touch me again.
"Don't touch me!" I shouted in anger in Hyunjin's face, who flinched and took a few steps back.
"I just want to talk to you!" he came back toward me the steps he had backed away from me and I shook my head.
"But I don't." I hissed, turning my head to the side as I didn't want to look him in the eye.
"My God Seungmin, can you finally explain to me what's wrong with you!"
"Are you that stupid?!" in a flash I turned to Hyunjin, who looked at me uncomprehendingly. As if he had absolutely no idea what he was even doing.
I was about to shout something in his face again when he suddenly grabbed me by the shoulders and pushed me against the lockers behind me.
Shocked, I looked at him, his gaze filled with anger.
I should be the one pissed off, not you.
"G-get away..." under a shaky voice, I tried to push the blond haired one away from me.
I didn't want to feel his closeness anymore.
He shouldn't fucking touch me!
"Not until you tell me what's going on." Hyunjin's voice was just a breath. He sounded so soft that I couldn't almost hear him.
He had rested his forehead on my shoulder, his hands still fixing me against the locker behind me.
At that moment I didn't even notice how scattered tears ran down my cheeks. Slowly they made their way to the floor and I couldn't help sobbing.
It just hurt so damn much that this ferret just didn't understand.
Hyunjin seemed to realize what was going on with me and quickly broke away from me and looked at me with wide eyes.
"Minnie..."
Not that nickname...
I couldn't get a word out. The only thing that could be heard was my sobbing that I couldn't hold back any longer.
"I'm sorry." from one second to the other I realized how two strong arms wrapped around me and pressed me tightly against a strong chest.
"Whatever I did, I'm sorry." whispered Hyunjin into my neck, leaving a soft kiss there.
"You're such an idiot..." I mumbled and buried my fingers in his white shirt, trying to hold on to it so i wouldn't fall over right away.
And there I was.
A crying wreck and my feelings for Hyunjin forever unspoken.