TRIGGER WARNING: blood, wound description, domestic violence, character death
THEMES: Angst, Class 1A are family
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Fire was the only thing Shoto could see. Flickering blue flames clouding, cornering and blinding his vision, so dense and consuming they felt like a choking grip in his throat. Unshed tears were brimming on his waterline as his head flung from one building to another, looking, hoping praying.
A new flame caught his eye from far away on his left, exploding glass from a top floor window falling down on them like piercing rain. Shoto looked up at the building, and down to the exit that was billowing with smoking flames.
"Shoto! I need help over here!" Midoriya yelled, and he ran over to help two civilians over to the ambulances, careful of broken limbs or open wounds; yet, even when he was answering questions about the injuries and incident, his gaze kept returning to the window.
"Shoto! The flames won't stop!"
With calculated precision he sent up a wave of ice, giving the firefighters enough time to zone off the area and prepare their equipment. People were running to and fro, shouts and screams filling the smoking air. This had all happened out of nowhere, they were out on a patrol run as a class when all of a sudden there was a League attack right in their area.
Dabi. He hadn't seen Dabi. He saw Toga jumping down into an open sewer, a hero hot on her tail, and Shigaraki had been warped away by Kurogiri, Spinner was still fighting with Twice, but they were also on the run, but Dabi he hadn't seen since he sent his tsunami wave of blue fire at his classmates, his ice able to protect them but not the surrounding area.
In the chaos Dabi was all he could think of. When he helped carry injured civilians or prevent the collapse of falling buildings, or when Aizawa was calling them in for recon. Shoto wasn't paying attention to anything the Hero was saying, all he could think of was how to get inside that building. He knew, he knew he was in there...
"Icyhot! Pay attention! I don't wanna have to drag your fuckin' ass out-! Icyhot?!"
Shoto gave his classmates a desperate look before running off and away, towards the building that was starting to char and collapse at the roof.
"Shoto!" He heard Aizawa yell, and the faint sound of him whirling his Capture Scarf, but the exit was in sight and he sent a wave of freezing ice at it, the space clearing into an icy wasteland as he ran in. The first floor had desks and chairs scattered across the floor, light fixtures dangling by their wires. The reception computer made a constant whirring noise that put his nerves on edge. Looking at a singed sign he saw there were 30 floors in the building, so he took in a deep breath before sprinting up the stairs.
"Touya!" He yelled, voice scratchy from smoke inhalation.
He sent out ice as he ran up, not wanting more damage to occur than possible. With each crystal of ice came a gust of fresh wind, pushing smoke and ash out of the windows on each floor.
"Touya!" He yelled again, straining to hear over the crackling flames that destroyed everything in their path.
"Sho." The voice was faint, hoarse, unsure, and accompanied by a hacking cough, but so unmistakably Dabi.
"Where are you?!"
"Up... u-up-" Another cough, audible over the crumbling building.
He had reached the tenth floor and still no sign, so he made sure everywhere was iced over before he continued to run, his boots a heavy thud on each step as he forced blood and air through his body to keep himself going.
"Touya!" Shoto tried to gage how close Dabi was, feeling both desperation and determination with each passing floor.
"C-closer..."
It was on the 21st floor where the flames had died down, but in their place was a trail of blood staining the blue-grey office carpet, as if someone had been dragged or dragged themselves across it. A meeting room had its glass blown out, the blinds hanging loose and light crashed onto the oak desk. In front of it, was Dabi, leaning back against the wood whilst holding a hand against his side.
"Touya." He breathed out, a sheet of ice dulling the flames yet avoiding the Villain.
Shoto ran over and knelt down by Dabi, assessing him for any more injuries before looking at the most pressing one. There was so much blood it was likely Dabi was holding parts of his organs in, and the stickiness running down his hands was turning the carpet a deep, maroon red.
"Can I...?" He asked, hesitantly.
"Go ahead kid, not gonna do much anyways."
Shoto arranged them so that he was almost cradling Dabi, jet black hair with pure white peeking underneath resting against his torso. He slowly pulled the scarred hand away, wanting to freeze the wound or use his fire to cauterise it, but his chest clenched at the amount of extra pain that would put on Dabi.
So, he looks down with a tired smile, finally letting the tears that had been welling up for hours slowly drip down his face, some landing onto the rough purple skin beneath him. His voice cracked when he used it:
"I found you."
"Hey lil' bro." Dabi returned weakly. "Long time no see-" He broke off into another coughing fit, one that left him hoarse for breath.
"Hey, hey Touya. Please look at me, keep breathing. Please I-"
"Sho-"
"Please don't go. Come home. Y-you can't leave me again."
Dabi just smiled weakly, as much as he could manage without tearing the staples in his cheeks, and if his tear ducts weren't burnt he would be crying too, the familiar burning at the back of his eyes bringing back too many memories, perfect and painful.
"You've-" Dabi paused for breath, "You've grown so much. I'm so- so proud... Gonna be 'n amazing hero..."
"And you're going to be there to see it. Please Touya, I-I need you... Mother, she-" His tears blurred his vision, but the trademark aqua blue eyes shone through the dark haze around them; Dabi's coughing got worse, until drops of blood were spilling down his chin, a small river like the one on his side.
"Sorry Sho, but I think this is the end... Was fun y'know, seein' you grow... I love you, always have, never... never forget. Mother... tell mother I-
"Touya, no-"
"I love-"
"No, Touya please!"
"Love her."
"Please, stay awake. No, don't close your eyes, don't... please..."
Shoto's words trailed off into heart-wrenching cries as he watched the light fade from his brother's eyes, the hand holding his wound falling lifelessly to the ground. He begged and pleaded for him to wake, for him to be okay, for him to come and see mother and Fuyumi and Natsuo, to come back to them, to-
"Touya. I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry!"
This, everything was all his fault. If he hadn't been born with his gifts, if he had seen the dreams and desperations of his brother, then maybe Touya wouldn't have died on that hill. Maybe Dabi would have never existed and they both could have been heroes together. Nobody had to die, nobody had to get hurt.
But they did, Touya and Mother. They got hurt, and it was all his fault.
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A scream echoed in the distance, right from the direction Shoto ran off in. It sounded raw and painful, so horrified and sorrowful, that it made their chests clench in pain. The class and several Heroes ran after Shoto, following the trail of ice through the crumbling building right up to the 21st floor.
The river of darkening blood led them to a destroyed room, where a sobbing Shoto was holding a dead Dabi so tight and close that it was as though they were family. His head was down, red and white bangs covering his eyes from them, but the trails of silver tears ran clear for everyone to see.
"Please." He whispered, voice quiet and fragile in a way they had never heard before. "Please, wake up. Don't-" he paused as a shoulder-shaking breath left his lips, "don't do this to me again."
Not knowing how to approach, they watched as Shoto pleaded for Dabi to wake up, not aware of the eyes on him. It was only when the LOV members appeared in the room from one of Kurogiri's portals did they move into action, quirks and support gear at the ready.
"Stop." Shoto called out. "Don't fight."
Aizawa held his weapon still as his student looked up, eyes teary and red. But he didn't look at the Heroes or his classmates, instead he looked over to the League.
"You took care of him, right?" He asked. "You were his new family? He didn't feel alone anymore, right?" His tone was almost desperate, wanting to know that in the last few months of his life Touya had find a safe place to stay, safe people to be with.
Even the heartless Shigaraki wasn't spared from the sheer pain in Shoto's voice. And, despite sounding rusty and hoarse, he spoke to the future Hero.
"He was part of our family." Toga nodded her head in agreement, crying whilst looking at Dabi's dead body, a body who had once been a big brother figure to her. "We... we took care of him."
And Shoto broke down all over again, forehead resting atop of Dabi's, whilst sobs filled the silence between the Heroes and Villains.
"I'm sorry... I'm so sorry I wasn't there. I'm sorry I gave up trying to find you. I'm sorry I couldn't stop Endeavour from hurting you. I'm sorry. Just, please, come back to me, you can't leave me all alone again."
Aizawa was torn between wanting to comfort his student and doing his duty as a Hero, but it seemed the decision was made for him as soon as he and the other Pros took a step forward to detain the League before they could escape.
"Stop." Shoto's voice was sorrowful but stern. "Stop." He repeated. "Haven't you had enough?" J-just... just leave them alone. Please."
The League bowed in respect towards Dabi and Shoto before warping away into thin air. Aizawa made another step towards his student, but a gentle grip on his arm and a shake of the head from Mic made them retreat, giving Shoto time to mourn in peace. So many questions were racing around in his brain as he herded the more reluctant students out of the building, like what was the real identity of Dabi, and what was Shoto apologising so profusely about?
Just as the last student left the building ice covered every wall, floor, and surface, jagged edges like gleaming knives ready to kill. The creaking and scraping noise as it smothered the building hid the raw scream Aizawa knew was from his student from the way Jirou was holding her Earphone Jack tight, a hand to her mouth as she cried...
By the time Shoto emerged from the building the ambulances and most of the Heroes had left. The streets were eerily empty with the lack of civilians, and only small flickers of blue embers slowly dying were left as a sign of the disaster that had occurred. Aizawa, Mic, and the class had all stayed, wanting to know their friend and classmate was okay.
Jirou notified them when Shoto was walking down the stairs, and Mic went over to the door to greet him so he didn't have to face everyone at once. As soon as red and white hair emerged Mic held out his arms open wide for a hug; for once, Shoto didn't hesitate to fall into them, shaking shoulders visible even from a distance.
Then Shoto turned, looking up at the floor where he knew Touya's body lay, before bowing deeply in respect. He knew his brother had done evil things and hurt evil people, his friends included, but the slither of understanding and pity remained in his heart. He prayed to whatever ethereal being above to give his brother a happy existence after this one, hoping that after all they had been through they would finally be given guidance and support.
Holding his left hand out, summoned all of his remaining energy and set the building on fire. Red hot flames that slowly turned blue at the tips consumed the building like a funeral pyre, and the sight of what led Touya down this dark path being the thing that inevitably consumed him was enough to make his knees buckle.
Luckily Mic was there to catch him, and when Shoto had looked unblinking at the fire long enough for his eyes to dry out and burn, did the Hero hold him close and walk him away. He took Shoto back to UA, the rest of the class returning with Aizawa.
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The staff received a report saying that Dabi's remains could not be found, Shoto's fire truly having turned everything to ember and ash. When Aizawa had told him this, looking at Shoto's face only half-visible around his barely-open door, the boy simply nodded before shutting himself away as he had done the past three days.
He had iced the locks on both his door and balcony, meaning nobody was getting in unless Shoto wanted them to. They left meals that were untouched in the hallway three times a day, as well as tea in the evening. They asked him to come out and talk or watch a movie with them, but cold silence was their only response. The only reason Shoto had opened the door to Aizawa was because he threatened to call Endeavour; not that he wanted to either, since the man had been plaguing him with phone calls about his son every hour of the day.
After what Shoto had said, how he had reacted in such a personal and intimate way to Dabi's passing, the Hero did some digging of his own into the Todorokis' past. After shocking discoveries and contributions of his students' observations, Detective Tsukauchi had enough evidence to open a domestic abuse investigation case against Endeavour, meaning the man was no longer allowed on UA grounds.
When the class returned to their lessons, Shoto's absence glaring at him from the back of the classroom, he had a long and deep discussion with his students.
"Shoto is suffering through grief for a second time." He stated grimly. "This time there is no hope for him or for Da-" he paused, addressing the male by his real name, "for Touya, and this has really affected Shoto and his family. He will block you out, he will ignore you, but it is a Hero's duty to look after those who need their help, and so you must all be vigilant in your efforts. Shoto's life right now is uncertain and unstable, with both his brother's death and the investigation, and so no matter if he slams the door in your face or yells at you to leave him alone, you say okay and try again tomorrow, got it? Because very soon he's going to need all of you to get through some heavy things."
The day went by full of solemn looks and conversation. Due to the intensity of their fighting with the League physical training was suspended for the time being. This meant they were only in school until lunchtime, meaning three more hours of trying to coax Shoto out of his room, to eat or to shower or to just talk to them...
And after two more days they were successful.
On Saturday morning, when Midoriya had come up to the 5th floor to deliver Shoto's breakfast, he saw the handle begin to turn. He held his breath and halted his steps, knuckles turning white as he watched Shoto's figure slowly lean out of the doorway. When he saw the unkempt hair and dark eye bags, it was only his grip that prevented the tray falling to the floor.
"Todoroki-kun." He greeted, voice soft almost with disbelief before a shining smile appeared on his face. "Good morning! Are you hungry?"
Shoto nodded and the pair returned to his room, sitting down at the table and eating breakfast together. There was no conversation, but sometimes Midoriya shared an interesting fact he had learned in class, doing anything to avoid Shoto's thoughts drifting off to either his brother or the investigation.
"Do you feel better today?" he asked, slowly piling up the dishes and cutlery on the tray to take back downstairs. "I'm glad you've had some breakfast, All Might says it's the most important meal of the day!" He tried to impersonate his idol, getting a small sigh from his friend in return.
Somehow, Midoriya managed to convince Shoto to take a shower and freshen up before coming downstairs for a change of scenery. He had put in the new groupchat, one without Shoto in so he wouldn't be angered or upset, what was happening and so only some of Shoto's closest friends and peers were downstairs. When he finally showed up he silently sat down in the corner of the sofa and watched Ponyo on the TV with Momo and Bakugou, Tsuyu doing some homework at the coffee table with Midoriya.
There was little conversation whilst the movie played, only a warm good morning greeting from Momo when she placed a honey tea in front of Shoto alongside some of her expensive biscuits. Nobody minded this however as they were glad Shoto was outside of his room; they hoped the fresher air would clear away the blank haze settled over his eyes.
At last the movie ended, the faint scribbling of pencil on paper interrupted by a quiet voice.
"I thought Touya had died 8 years ago."
All heads turned to him, yet Shoto stayed looking down at the warm-toned drink in his palms. He could see his reflection in them: the stormy grey eye from his mother, the gleaming blue from his father, and long red and white hair that probably needed cutting.
"I thought Endeavour had killed him."
The pencils stopped moving.
"Touya had my father's quirk but my mother's constitution, so he suffered every time he used it. But Endeavour still trained him to push past the pain, because our lives don't matter as long as the job gets done; dying is something to expect from a young age."
"Shoto..."
"When I was born my father neglected Touya just as he did with my other siblings, and eventually the sadness at having to treat the injuries that were all over my body instead of his became anger. He trained his quirk on his own, but one night it got out of hand and all I could see from my window was my father yelling as my brother burnt to death on the ground. By the time the ambulance came he was gone, there was nothing to be found, and half the forest was turned to ash."
Shoto paused as his grip tightened, and he took a sip of the warm tea to pause his speaking. His voice was scratchy from lack of use this past week.
"At the training camp I started to suspect Dabi was Touya, but I couldn't accept it because I had watched him die. But he knew my name, and his flames are... no, were-" he laughed bitterly, making his friends gulp tears down, "such a blue nobody else possessed. The more I fought him the more I could see Endeavour's training engrained in his every move, his scars the outcome of his quirk slowly killing him.
"I've always wondered what he had done these last few years. Did he heal himself, suffer alone with burns that tore his body apart, a fractured mind from the evil in my household? I don't know, I never will, but I'm happy he found people to be with no matter how evil their actions. I knew, as did he, that he wasn't meant for a long life, but I at least hoped he would get to see Mother once again. She was his favourite, you know."
So much time had been stolen from them all, so many possibilities for a bright and happy life. Where Rei could see her own children and not breakdown from the trauma forced onto her at a young age. Where Touya could be the older sibling to the three of them, to take care of them and teach them all sorts of things. But their lives had all been damned with the first breath they took in the Todoroki household.
"I'm sorry for what Touya has done to you all, to Heroes and civilians, but I'm not sorry for forgiving him even if you can't."
The silence stretched on, Shoto not wanting to look up and see the angry faces of his classmates, how they would find him sick for forgiving his brother for all the atrocities he had committed. But that was Dabi the Villain not Touya his older brother.
"Shoto." Tsuyu began, moving from her seat at the table to kneel by Todoroki's legs. "We can never begin to imagine what your family have endured." She placed a tentative hand on his knee, making her look up at her from his tea. "But we can help you move forwards in any way we can."
"I know you've endured more than you ever should have." Momo added. "But it shows what a kind and amazing person you are that you're still here wanting to become a hero that helps people."
"I never had a reason to become a hero." Shoto confessed. "It was what I was created for, what my sole purpose of existence was. But... Touya said that I would be a great hero, so I want to become one to make him proud. I want to be a hero that helps those who are ignored, to help those who need me the most."
"That's a damn good reason to be a hero if you ask me." Bakugou stated. "I think the world needs more heroes like you, Icyhot."
Shoto didn't realise he was crying until a stray tear fell onto his hand, followed by another and another. His crying was still and silent, just how he had been taught to cry, but when one pair of hands turned to two then three then four, his walls broke down and he sobbed just as hard as he did in that building.
"We're here for you Todoroki-kun, no matter what."