Itachi’s three-stage Sharingan illuminated at the sound of my threat. Any word of Sasuke concerned Itachi, whether it be either good or bad news. His lips, once turned up in concern, twitches downwards in a sneer. Nobody touched Sasuke; I should’ve known that by now.
“I think we need to talk,” Itachi said rather dismissively.
One day, echoed through my mind.
Kisame had no objections to a private conversation with Itachi so he started back down the dirt track to Iwagakure while Itachi and I took to the tree canopies to discuss the matter at hand―Sasuke.
In Itachi’s mind, Sasuke was just a misled little boy, acting out on his hurt and rage. Sasuke Uchiha can’t possibly do any wrong because he’s the prodigy of the first branch Uchiha. Sasuke Uchiha can’t possibly be capable of slaughtering countless of people on the hunt for the ‘man’ that killed the Uchiha to protect him. Sasuke Uchiha can’t possibly be a cold hearted sociopath. Sasuke Uchiha can’t possibly have any justification to leave the village.
“My little brother is not your concern, do you understand?” Itachi hissed.
I lowered myself onto the branch, dropping to my haunches in warning. Itachi was breaking my boundaries which I’d so delectably placed for my own personal protection. There was a time where I truly cared for Sasuke, the little chubby legged child that thought I was Itachi―but then that admiration turned into disgust to see how he treated Naruto, how he forced the tailed-beast to manipulate Naruto’s brooding emotions. I hated Sasuke Uchiha, and not even Itachi’s bond could change my mind.
“Name one good thing that Sasuke’s done for his beloved Nii–San,” I mocked, vehemence to my tone.
Itachi flinched back slightly, “You wouldn’t understand, you were an only child.”
“He wants to kill you!” I screeched, angling my fist at the branch that held me. Fragments of bark splintered in every direction, clattering against the porcelain mask I wore. “Why can’t you see that Sasuke will only hinder your very existence!”
“He is my brother,” Itachi said.
“He’s your undoing,” I snapped.
“Sasuke shouldn’t be your obligation,” Itachi growled.
“I did what you couldn’t, I protected him,” my voice rose another pitch.
“By giving up your Sharingan? You’re foolish Etsuko, Sasuke is indeed my brother but there was no need to give up such gifted prowess. Sasuke is my responsibility, Otosan intrusted his safety to me, not you,” Itachi’s three Tomoe slowly interlocked into the three-prong pinwheel formation of his Mangekyou.
“You left him there! What was I supposed to do―die and have Sasuke stumble upon another corpse? Wake up Ita–Kun, life isn’t a game of Shogi…we can’t avoid the inevitable, Sasuke will find you,” my chest heaved.
“And when that time comes Etsu–Chan,” Itachi’s eyes softened around the edges, his shoulders relaxing, “I will make sure that you’re not left alone, I will never leave you.”
“But you will, because Sasuke won’t stop until you’re a hollow shell,” I recoiled back to the trunk of the tree. “It will always be Sasuke, you will always choose him and there’s nothing I can do to change that. It’s not the question of choice between me and your brother, but when you should give up.”
“What do you propose I do then?” Itachi gnashed his jaws like a dog. “Do I become a ghost like you? Leading everyone I love to grieve for four years in guilt? Shall I put on a mask and flit through villages for the rest of my life like you have? No, I have pride Etsuko, something which you lack.”
“You left me in the same state!” I screamed.
“And who did you grieve for in those years hiding? Was it Shisui―is that why you screamed that traitors name while Hidan and Deidara tortured you? Did you seriously think that that bastard would save you?” Itachi fumed.
“Shisui did more than you ever could, at least he told me his feelings to my face instead of giving me cryptic answers, placing me last on the pile while you pursue a futile mission!” I swallowed.
“Is that what this argument is all about? The fact that I don’t love you? Etsu–Chan, not a day goes by where my heart doesn’t ache to be with you, where my body doesn’t quiver at the thought of you in my arms―ever since you fell on your back with a smile in the first Uchiha Trials, I’ve been besotted by your very being,” he paused to draw a sharp breath, “don’t you dare say I haven’t done anything to prove myself. I love you, I always have, I always will and Sasuke will never destroy what we’ve forged.”
“That isn’t...stop it,” I cleared my throat.
“Listen to the doubt in your voice, you know what I say is true,” Itachi folded his arms.
“But this won’t change a thing, love won’t stop you from dying by Sasuke’s blade,” I clutched my chest tight.
“Nor would you killing him solve our feelings,” Itachi deadpanned.
“It will always be Sasuke,” I spit.
“He’s my brother,” Itachi repeated.
“Then I am nothing,” I held my head high, staring Itachi square in the face so he could see Shisui’s Mangekyou―the image that would plague him until the day he died, the fact that love has no meaning, that Shisui’s eye means something more, a little piece of him living on, something that Itachi can’t outrun nor destroy.
“Why must you be so stubborn?” Itachi grunted.
“Why must you hurt me?” I winced.
“Etsu–Chan,” Itachi drawled softly, perhaps as a ploy to quell our fight.
“Ita–Kun,” my eyes wept for Itachi, but my voice remained impassive.
“I won’t allow you to end up like Sasuke,” and as always, Itachi showed no resistance as my body dispersed into thousands of feathers. He simply watched, Itachi did nothing.
***
The man, the one that Sasuke and Naruto chased after, stood in the middle of a downpour and I could only watch from afar as his life trickled away along with the rain. His prayers, shattered beneath the clap of thunder. His wounds, gaping and open, illuminated through the fork of lightning. Yet all of his pain was metaphorical, shielded behind the blank mask of his face as he overlooked the chasm in the valley.
Kisame scooped up the Yonbi Jinchuriki, the elderly man’s body hung limp across Samehada’s bound side as Kisame swung the blade across his shoulder. The shark made no attempt to shield himself from the rain like on the night of the monsoon, but his beady eyes frequently flicked up to the sky to frown at Kuragari that fluttered overhead, observing with disappointment.
“We can’t have the body getting too cold,” Kisame mused with a chuckle in hopes to lighten Itachi’s mood, “let’s wait this storm out under a tree.”
“Hn,” was Itachi’s response.
The charcoal painted guard around the Jinchuriki’s nose had a small hairline crack, making the plate fall from the man’s face to reveal a paled scar that resembled the colour of creamy milk in the wintertime. He didn’t put up much of a fight, nor did he assume Bijuu form like Naruto or Yugito. He was a valued citizen and certainly not a candidate in my Bingo Book. He hung over Kisame’s shoulder like a trophy, and I had no problem with that.
“He’s near death,” Itachi observed candidly, “be sure to handle that old man carefully.”
“You wouldn’t say that if Shinkoshoku was here, you wouldn’t thwart her every move with warnings that the Yonbi Jinchuriki was known for different elemental fusions, he was just as much of a pushover as you,” Kisame commented with a grumble.
You don’t have first-hand experience fighting Etsuko, you wouldn’t understand the trouble I went through to survive our battles, Itachi thought fiercely.
Kuragari swooped in closer when both men took cover beneath the thick branches of an oak surrounded by tufts of brown grass on the flat. Itachi promptly collapsed against the trunk of the tree, propped his heels up against the bulging roots while Kisame tossed the body of the Jinchuriki on the ground.
“Shinkoshoku’s left us, are you sure she won’t tell our secrets?” Kisame probed.
After the blow-out with Itachi, I approached Kisame yet again from a distance with a favour. I wanted it to seem that I couldn’t be trusted, so that Itachi could find who he cared for more. I was sick of conflicted feelings, especially after being played by Hidan; I wasn’t going to lose to a cocky Uchiha, never again. So, Kisame would make me out to be the bad guy and Itachi would have to find clarity or I would indeed be unattainable once again.
“The Leaf has a large amount of contacts in the other Hidden Villages,” Itachi justified, “if they put the world out, it’ll be very difficult for us to make a move. Etsuko knows that, but it’s not in her forte to cross the Akatsuki.”
“What makes you so sure?” Kisame scowled.
“There is one thing that Etsuko holds closer than her Nagamaki at night,” Itachi gave a confident smirk, “and that is a Gin–Sho.”
“So she’s an avid gambler, what’s your point?” Kisame muttered.
“You misinterpret my means, I’ve got her locked in check-mate, she has given me her heart…and I have won,” he said.
***
Kyuubi’s growl echoed through my mind, causing me to slow my pursuit for Sasuke after hearing Itachi’s triumphant speech. The large crimson spheres of the Demon Fox illuminated the dark subconscious of my mind, pulling me into Naruto’s thoughts so I could experience vignettes through his eyes.
Release the block; it was more of a demand than a request.
Tsunade was perched on her desk with Jiraya by her side; once again Naruto was called into her office regarding his pursuit not just for Sasuke, but for his beloved Nii–San. My Uchiha. Probing for information would be useless; Tsunade was under oath (perhaps even stricter) by Hiruzen to stop her from spilling the Leaf’s secrets.
“Itachi Uchiha, eh―what about him?” Tsunade pondered.
“If we can just capture one member of the Akatsuki, we can turn them over to Ibiki and let him extract whatever information he can get,” proposed Sakura.
Not likely, I thought.
Don’t get too cocky. Uchiha, Kyuubi responded.
I could see the confliction of Tsunade’s face; she was torn by the oath sworn as Hokage and the human ability to feel empathy for others. Naruto’s glistening cheeks showed his anguish, he wanted to find his friend and piece back the memories in which I’d so selfishly stolen from him whereas Sakura wanted to ‘kill’ the strange Uchiha whom took Sasuke away from her.
“An order was past to one Nin to take on the members of the Akatsuki and if they encountered any…they would report back to the village via a summoning,” Tsunade murmured distantly. “There was only one person that the former Hokage could trust, one which loved the village more than life itself.”
“Itachi, right?” Sakura cut in with a pout.
“No,” Tsunade’s nails dug into the varnish on the desk, she repeated herself to appear strong willed, as if she wasn’t remembering the conversation I last had with her in person, when she signed my death warrant. “This Nin…she…she is dead to us.”
You enjoy them squirm, just like Madara Uchiha revelled at the discomfort of the Uzumaki and Senju, Kyuubi snarled.
I had to do this, Naruto doesn’t deserve to love me, I reasoned.
“Even with the help of our leak, the Akatsuki remain like smoke, completely untouchable,” said Kakashi from the corner.
“Then what’re we supposed to do? We can’t just let Sasuke roam around, what if he accidently stumbles across Etsu―” my name vanishes from Naruto’s tongue and I watch the muscle dance in his jaw as he struggles to remember. “Damn it!” he gripped his head in anger.
“The only thing we can do is to find Itachi,” Kakashi said.
“And the only way we can do that is if we track down Etsu―” every time my name got close to his thoughts, an extra murmur would be added, that tantalising syllable which would just be snatched away through the cruel Kotoamatsukami.
If you want to help your Uchiha mate, then help the Uzumaki brat, Kyuubi bargained.
No, I rolled my eyes.
Release the damn block before you lose your wits! it was a gut churning roar, one that reverberated through my eardrums, causing me to shake my head back beneath the cover of a branch from the monsoon.
“So you want to hunt down Itachi in order to find Sasuke,” Jiraya stroked his chin in amusement, yet it didn’t quite meet his eyes. “Let’s say you actually find him, what’re you gonna do then? Obviously he’ll have protection, some more obvious than others.”
“She…she will help us,” Naruto grunted, palming his forehead. “Etsu…she will!”
Sakura’s jade eyes looked over Naruto with close scrutiny, “If we kill Itachi, Sasuke –Kun will no longer have a target so our only chance is to capture him. And to do that, we’ll have to seek out this mysterious leak of yours to save time.”
“And if this lead doesn’t want to be found?” Jiraya deliberates.
“No, Etsu…she…she wouldn’t need to be coaxed out,” Naruto’s head tosses left to right as he bit his lip, drawing a thin trickle of blood. “The village was more important to her…I was.”
“Who are you talking about?” Sakura frowned.
“Me,” I appear in a cloud of smoke on the windowsill of Tsunade’s office. I casually brush three stray black crows feathers from my lap and tip the brim of my bamboo hat at the startled onlookers. “Shinkoshoku Toge at your service.”
I thought I told you not to come back here for your safety, Tsunade internally gasped.
“Y–you’re part of the Akatsuki!” Sakura pointed accusingly at the red clouded cloak adorning my body.
Hmph, not as stubborn as I first thought, Kyuubi chuckled in amusement.
“Not exactly,” I waggled a bandaged index finger at them. “If you want to find Sasuke Uchiha, consider me hired.”
“E…Etsu…ko?” I ignored my true name that softly left Naruto’s lips.
[A/N: sorry for such a late update, these EtsuxIta feels are killing me]