I looked out the window of Soul Cafe, stirring the familiar smelling hazelnut coffee that I'd drunk regularly for years.
I, Jung Y/n, after three years of hiding in London, finally came home to Seoul. Why was I hiding? Well, let's just say it's family issues and let it go, shall we?
The waitress set a sea salt caramel chocolate cake in front of me, and I smiled sadly, remembering who I used to share this with.
Bang Christopher Chan, my best friend, my first love.
He used to laugh every time I ordered this, trying to say it out himself then complaining that it was such a tongue twister.
It's been years since I last saw that smile.
I still remembered twelve-year-old me, walking home alone in the rain. The new transfer student from Australia, who had just moved in next to me, had shared his umbrella and made small talk with me all the way home.
I remembered, that even if the sun was hidden behind the clouds that day, his smile was enough to give me warmth. Even the way he talked was filled with so much passion and care, that he made me feel loved.
We were never seen apart after that day.
Soon, the little friendship blossomed into something more. Maybe he felt it too, how every glance we shared was filled with a deeper love.
But the smiling boy was broken on the inside.
His parents fought every day, and the boy spent every night locked in his room as wine bottles crashed outside.
"I believe, broken is beautiful." I had told him once I found him alone in his room while his parents are away. He had punched the mirror, and his knuckles were embedded with the glass until I cleaned his wound.
A broken piece of the mirror laid beside him. I had picked up the piece and held it up to the light. The reflection of my eyes showed in the glass.
"See, it's broken, but it's still doing what it was made to do. Broken things aren't really broken if they work. I'll help you become who you want to be, putting you back together piece by piece."
"Promise me." He had asked after he wiped off his tears. "Promise me you'd never leave me, that we'd be together, that we'd help each other."
I had interlocked our pinkies and whispered the promise that night, not knowing what was going to happen.
We spent every day together after that, slowly revealing a bit more of us to each other. Soon enough, the word 'secrets' had ceased to exist between us.
At least, that's what I thought.
"Y/n, you can't stay here anymore. Your aunt is after you, and the family fortune. Stay in London for a while, and I'll call you back after things die down and the Will is signed."
That's what my father had said to me after he made me disappear from Korea.
"Change your number, cut off contacts with your friends, you need to stay away from Korea until that bitch has learned not to mess with me."
I had just nodded and packed my bags like the good daughter I was, leaving my family, my friends, my life, and especially him, behind.
I... didn't tell him.
Just a short letter to tell him I would be leaving, and I won't be coming back any time soon. Just a short goodbye, as if he meant nothing to me.
But I was back now, and I could explain everything to him. The bright Bang Chan I knew would probably at his apartment with his friends, I mean, play his role as the father to his seven kids.
But that was not the case.
"Chan Hyung? I haven't seen him in a year..."
"He moved out of the apartment?" I asked Minho as we talked over the phone.
"We all moved out Y/n, I'm back in Gimpo... The others and I still talk often though. In fact, Hannie just stayed over with me last week, and Changbin visited sometime this month too."
"Oh."
My coffee had gone cold. It had started to rain.
I had tried my best to track Chan down, but no one knew anything about it.
"Cold, it was as if all the warmth was sucked out of him." Felix had murmured when I met him at this very cafe two days ago.
I had placed my hand over his. "You sound the same Lix."
"I've been through rough times, and I didn't have my pillar to lean on... didn't have my hyung holding me up. I'll pull through, I'm healing. I'm more worried about him."
A stray tear had escaped my eyes and I wiped it off.
Cold? Lifeless?
I ran a hand through my hair. I sipped my coffee. I heard the bell at the cafe door jingle, telling me there was another customer.
"Welcome to Soul Cafe, where each sip of caffeine heals your soul. What would you like sir?"
"One Hazelnut latte." The voice murmured. I paid no attention to it, it sounded foreign, weak, lifeless.
"Would you like something with your drink sir?"
The new customer was quiet for a while.
"The caramel cake, the sea salt choco caramel cake."
My head whipped up, and standing in front of my eyes, was him, Chan.
My tears flowed freely now, as I broke down over how fragile he looked. His skin was shades paler than his fading blonde hair, and he had bags under his eyes. He was thin, so skinny that I could see his bones jutting out through his old shirt and baggy jeans. He looked like he hadn't slept in weeks, or ate in months.
He sat down as he waited for his order, he still hadn't noticed me. I wiped my tears with trembling hands and made my way over to him.
He was gazing out the window, watching the rain with sad eyes. My heels clicked at the ground as I came to a stop next to him.
"Cha-channie."
Beautiful.
He's beautiful when he's broken. The way he turned to me, his long lashes hooding his eyes... he looked ethereal.
But he was the most beautiful when he smiled.
I didn't get to see that smile that day.
"I'm home," I said, tears flowing from my eyes.
There was a momentary shock in his eyes, he sucked in a breath.
But that all disappeared in an instant.
He showed no emotion, but those who knew him would see the cold anger in his eyes, the sadness of how his lips turned down.
"Cancel my order." He called out, ignoring me. He stood up to leave, but I grabbed his arm.
"Where are you going?" I asked through my tears.
He doesn't bother to answer me, showcasing his anger. He simply yanked his arm from my grip and exited the cafe.
My feet wouldn't move, wouldn't go after him. But the boy had no trouble walking away, even though the rain poured down on his back.
I hung my head and collapsed on the chair.
It would be another week before I saw him again.
"Chan hates me Hyunjin, he just left." I sigh as I lean on my bedroom balcony.
I had texted the boys that I saw Chan at the cafe, and Hyunjin being the first one to read my text, had called me.
"He... I know what you mean Y/n, he's walked out on all of us too, but... why do you think he was there in the first place? Soul cafe? Hazelnut Latte? He misses you... he doesn't want to."
"But it doesn't matter Jinnie, he won't even speak to me, look at me even." I sob as tears well in my eyes.
"But you should. I know, deep down, that he needs you to smile again. You were his glue, and once you left, he fell apart. He needs you to put him back together again. Next time you see him, don't let him run away, chase him, even if it's till the end of the world. You need him as much as he does."
I did see him again, as I mentioned before.
But it was in the most unexpected place.
I was passing by the neighborhood because an old friend of mine had moved nearby. We weren't that close, but she invited me to her wedding.
Only while walking to the bus stop did I realize, it was the same road Chan and I took to walk home from school.
There was the familiar convenience store that we stopped by for a popsicle, and the kid's playground opposite to it where we lazed about.
With a sad smile on my face, I walked into the playground, reliving old memories.
I didn't expect him to be there, doing the same.
There he was, by the swings, holding onto the metal bars, with his eyes closed.
Don't let him run away. He needs you as much as you need him.
"Chan?" I walk up to him.
His eyes open, and he looks shocked. This time too, he tried to walk away.
"Wait!" I grab his arm, but he yanks it away.
"Leave me alone." He growls. I've never heard him speak like that.
Where did my soft-voiced angel go?
"You were the one who made me promise not to leave," I begged.
"That didn't stop you from leaving!" He yelled. "You've done it once, you can do it again!"
"I won't Channie, I can explain." I try to reason with him, feeling the sting of tears in my eyes.
"I don't want to hear anything from you." He says in a low voice, and I break down, tears streaming from my eyes.
"I'm not letting you go!" I yell back.
He just glares at me and starts walking away. It was starting to rain.
"Don't let him run away y/n."
So I didn't. I ran after him, and caught him from behind, wrapping my arms around his waist. He struggled against me, but I held on tighter, pressing my face to the back of his shirt to stop the tears.
"I said I'm not letting you go!"
In the end, he stopped struggling and leaned his head back to look at the sky.
He was crying too.
We sit down at the swings, lightly moving back and forth as we waited for the other to collect our thoughts. The rain poured down, but as a drizzle.
"My grandfather fell sick three years ago, and people wanted him to hurry up and write the Will. He... before his first surgery, told everyone that he'd leave everything to me, and my aunt got mad. She threatened us to knock some sense into him but my father wouldn't budge. In the end, she went as far as having me kidnapped just for a deal to split the money."
Chan's eyes were fixed on the ground, and the side of his face didn't reveal what emotions he was going through. But I swore I saw his eyes widen and eyebrows furrow. In worry or anger, I didn't know.
"Well, my parents got scared about the kidnapping... my aunt was pulling all sorts of stunts in the court too... My dad sent me away and told me to cut off all contact from Korea so I won't be bothered until the final hearing."
"A goodbye though? You just left... and everything went on as if you were never here... You couldn't even contact me once?" He asked.
I shook my head, a sad smile forming on my lips.
"I couldn't even talk to my mother for three years Channie. All I got was a monthly letter from dad updating me on the situation. I swear I didn't know it would take so long, I left you in the hopes that I'd be back in a couple of months."
He looked away from me, and I realized he was crying again.
"I never wanted to leave you, I didn't leave you on purpose. My father told me not to tell anyone anything! A single day didn't pass in which I didn't think about you. I was waiting to get back, desperate to see you again. I left in the hopes that you'd found new friends, and they'd keep you happy but I didn't know it would turn out this way." I sobbed.
Chan got up and crouched down in front of me.
He wiped the tears from my eyes.
"I... was hurt. After everything we've been through, you just left, as if I meant nothing to you. I thought we had something special, but the fact that you wrote me just that letter and disappeared for years... I felt like nothing. I hated you, I never thought you'd have to leave for a reason. Hating you was so much easier than loving you."
"I won't leave you, ever again! I promise this time. Because now I can fight back, now I can root myself to the ground and make my own decision. And I decided to stay. I'll stay this time."
"A pinky promise won't cut it this time." He smiled at me, wiping my tears again by cupping my face.
That smile was back.
"Then?"
"This."
Before I could ask what he was talking about, his lips crashed into mine.
The sun.
Even though the rain drizzled down, I felt warm at that moment. He didn't hesitate one bit, as if he was waiting to do this for a long time. His lips moved against mine, as if he was pouring out years of rage and hurt at that very moment.
That's exactly what we did.
Every single moment of the past, we poured out, all the misunderstandings and pain to be washed out with the rain.
We were at a new chapter of our story, and both of us wished it would be happier than the past ones.
"There, now the promise is sealed." He pulled away.
I blushed, and he chuckled, pulling me into a hug. I hid my embarrassed face into the folds of his t-shirt.
As much as I loved his smile, nothing could beat his hugs. It was like being wrapped in a heated blanket after a warm bowl of soup.
"Stay with me, forever and ever?"
"Mhm, forever and ever~"
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Hey everyone~
I hoped you liked this one, though it was different from the other two. I usually struggle a lot with sad stories, but I remember flowing everything out when I wrote this one. But when I re-read it, I felt like I failed to express exactly what I wanted to say, but it's fine. I think I did quite well with my skills, but if you find something wrong or any way to make it better, please leave a comment.
I really liked writing this one, and I hope you enjoyed reading it as well. Please vote if you liked the story, and comment your thoughts, it's a great help. :)
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