I had decided to move away and I was going to tell everyone but slight change of plans, I still had a few jobs left in UK and I still had the Comic Con and Ellen's interview scheduled in a few days. So, I'm not moving yet.
Yay.
It was May of 2014, surprisingly, it was warmer today, so I decided to wear jean shorts with a loose brown t-shirt with a knot in front of it, cause it was too loose, some sneakers and my glasses. I put my hair in a high messy bun, applied some light makeup and headed to the San Diego Convention Centre.
Almost every important actor from the movie was invited. I was sat in between Tom and Ralph, while Emma and Rupert were next to each other with Dan in the center and the others were scattered around the panel. What surprised me the most was Robert was here as well. I opened my bottle of water and brought it to my mouth.
"It's hot, isn't it?" Tom asked making me nod. "So, my first question is to Y/N" a girl said into the mic. "Hi, darling" I said happily.
"So, I wanted to ask, after working with everyone closely for so long, how - how does it feel knowing that you won't be returning to the Harry Potter set on a yearly basis now?"
"Oh, erm, well, straight to the wound. Haha, erm, yeah, it's - it's going to be difficult and very sad, it's been, uh, I guess, almost a year, since we last went on set and I haven't come on terms with it. I'm going to miss the set and yeah, everyone around it"
After a few more questions to the others, another fan asked me, "Hi, Y/N, I love you in all the movies. Erm, my question for you is, it's, who is a better kisser? Tom, Daniel or Robert?" Everyone started laughing and only one name flashed in my mind.
Tom.
I laughed awkwardly, but couldn't answer, how am I supposed to sound okay when I say Tom's name and not hurt the others? "Yeah, who is going to be, Shorty?" Tom said coming closer to my face. Dan and Robert got up from the chairs and walked over to me, "Yeah, gorgeous, who is going to be?" Rob asked placing his chin on top of my head while Dan came closer to the other side of my face, "Yes, love, who is it going to be?"
I pushed all their faces away and said, "How about Scarlet?" The crowd started laughing, cheering and applauding, while the boys took their place. "I'm not saying but 'I kissed a girl and I liked it', what?" I said and put the mic away making everyone laugh. "Also, what's the most craziest fan you ever had?" she asked another question.
"He's sitting right next to me" I said making everyone laugh. "That's not true, that is not true" Tom chimed in. "Oh, please" I joked, "Do you how many times I've heard, 'I love you, Y/N'?"
Not once, but eh...
Everyone laughed and Tom looked at me, "Now, that's also not true, but I agree, I am her biggest fan" he said and pecked my cheek. After another round of questions, a girl stood up, "Y/N, you know the TikTok trend, where people are like together and they're asked to segregate, as in, 'Looks like a potato, is a potato'?"
"Yeah"
"So, erm, I'd like you to segregate - Ginny, Tom, Neville and erm, Draco"
"Alright, erm, let's see, okay this one is easy, Tom Riddle is erm, he looks like he could kill you and would definitely kill you, then erm, another easy one, Neville is, he looks like a potato is a potato. Then Ginny would be, looks like a potato could kill you and lastly Draco..." I looked at Tom and then back at the girl, "Draco is erm, he looks like he could kill you but is a potato"
"Also, this isn't a question, but erm, I just wanted to tell that you make me bi-panic" she added making everyone laugh, "W-Wait, wait, what is bi-panic?" Dan asked and I laughed, "Erm, it's when a- there are a lot of meanings, but erm, I think the girl means when a girl finds another girl attractive but is straight not bi"
"Plus, I don't know, if you probably remember me or not, erm-" I squinted my eyes to get a better look at her.
"Wait, wait, I do, erm, I pecked your cheek at the premiere of Half Blood Prince, after erm, after you complimented my dress or my look or something, am I right?"
"Yes" she replied shyly making the crowd applaud. "That's the thing we love, erm, we love how you remember us. Thank you"
"Er, Tom, my question is for you, I was just wondering if you were looking forward to your wedding with Daniel Radcliffe" a guy asked making everyone laugh. Before Dan could say anything, Tom cut him off, "He's - he's wearing the dress" he joked making Dan huff. It was cute how they both liked the ship 'Drarry'.
"I have a question for Y/N, how in any of the movies, whenever you're walking with Dumbledore or Snape or even Voldemort, we saw that you're always walking side by side or in front of them, never following them, even when you're at fault, how - why is that?"
I laughed, "Well, it is because, they all wear big robes, so, the first time, I ever did a scene with each of them, I would step on their robes from behind, instantly choking them with the collar of their robe, so I was actually banned to walk behind anyone from then"
"This question is for everyone, erm, what Harry Potter character would you like to play and why?"
Everyone answered and now it came to James, "I'd like to play George" everyone laughed with him, "It's because we kinda look the same, so-" he was interrupted by Michael, "W-Who is George?" he asked making everyone laugh. "Me" Oliver replied and bent forwards in his seat in embarrassment.
"Erm, I'd like to play Narcissa, yeah, Helen plays the role of Narcissa amazingly, I don't think I'd be able to reach that height but for one, she didn't take the Dark Mark and she was in the inner circle. For two, she was ruthless in doing whatever she could to keep her family together, she was a loving wife and a caring mother. For three, she was one of the people who deceived Voldemort just to protect her son. Erm, she knew what mattered the most about Harry's survival and Voldemort's demise. She's - she's like the Head Bitch in charge" (Saw it on Tumblr)
"Seems like you've given this a lot of thought, so if they make a Harry Potter again in the future, you'd play Narcissa?"
"Yeah, only if I can see Tom as Lucius" I joked making everyone laugh.
"What's the weirdest place you have given an autograph?" I looked at Tom and we both knew the answer, cause we signed this together, we started laughing, "Oh boy, it - it was a boob, yeah, Y/N and I had to sign it, we pulled our Sharpies out and asked the girl again if we heard her correctly and we did. We signed her boob"
"What role in which movie would you like to play so badly that you would do it for free?" a girl asked Tom. He laughed nervously and thought for a second, "Alright, who hired you? Erm, I'm kidding, er, James Bond, I would do James Bond for free" he said making everyone laugh.
"If you could go back into the films, and portray a different character, if you had an opportunity, who would you like to portray?"
"Haha, maybe, erm, Harry, so I could kiss Bonnie" I joked making everyone cheer. "You look really pretty today" Tom whispered so only I could hear. I smiled, "Thank you, Tommy boy"
••••••
We were back home since Ellen's interview with us was not for another month. I was going through some emails, when my phone rang, it was Tom. I ignored it the first time and went back to my work. He called again, "Hello?" I picked up the call to find Tom crying at the end of the call.
"Tom? T - Are you okay? Why are you crying?" I asked hurriedly standing up and picking up my keys. "Tim- Timber" he breathed out between sobs. "What happened to Timber?" I asked as I left the loft. "C-Can you come over?" he asked sniffling. "Ye- Yes, I'll be there in fifteen"
I don't like this.
I entered his apartment to see no sign of Timber. "Tom?" I called out putting my bag on the table and headed in. "Y/N" he said and hugged me tightly. We both sat on the ground of his living room. "Tom, what is it? You're scaring me" I said softly rubbing his back as he tightened the hug so much that it was difficult for me to breath.
"Timber had to be put down" he said in between sobs and I felt the world around me crumble and I can only imagine what Tom is going through. "What?" I asked pulling away, I wiped his tears and he looked into my eyes, "Cancer" he said before pulling me into another hug.
Now, the both of us were crying, but all you could hear were Tom's whimpers and sobs, cause he asked me to be here for him, if he saw me crying, I don't think he would be able to think straight. We sat in each other's embrace for a while, crying and comforting. After a good hour, I pulled away and sat him on the couch.
I wiped his tears again, "I miss her, Y/N. She was my everything" he said staring at the ground. I couldn't see him like this, "It's my fault" he blurted out. "W-What?" I asked rubbing his arm. "It's my fault, I didn't look after her enough, what if I brought her to the vet sooner? Maybe we could've detected it sooner and found a solution" he said putting his hands in his hair and gripping it tightly.
"Tom..." I pulled away his hand from his hair and took them in mine, he looked at me with red eyes, "Don't guilt yourself, love. Don't do that, I understand that your mind will go there and you can't stop it but there's also Cancer that we can't stop. I have no idea what you're going through, Tom, I'm sure your heart is breaking, but this is life, isn't it?"
"Why did it have to be her?"
"I know, I know, even I think that, but death is inevitable, we can't help it, but I know something that will" I said and stood up. I went to the stairs and pulled out a picture of Tom and Timber. I headed back to the living room and sat beside Tom. "Talk to her, say everything you ever wanted to say, do it now" I said making Tom look at me. I pushed the picture into his hands and he stroked her face in the picture with his thumb.
"I love you, darling. I.. I don't know how I'll cope up with your loss, it's too much" he cried and I rested my head on his shoulder and pulled him in a comforting embrace. "You were loved by everyone, everyone was happy around you. I will miss you no longer jumping on me when I enter the house" he continued to talk to the picture for a few minutes and turned to me.
"Thank you for being here, Shorty" he said making me smile with tears in my eyes. I pulled him in a hug and we heard the door open. Tom didn't pull away so didn't I. "Hello" a soft voice said and I realized it was Jade. I took her hand and pulled her in my place and we swapped Tom. She hugged him and I left the couple to grieve.
••••••
t22felton - Miss you my Snow pup! x @ timberlives
After a few days, we held a funeral for Timber, everyone must think that it was crazy, but I knew what she meant for Tom. So, I contacted a pet cemetery and arranged for a burial. Everyone had gathered at the cemetery, Tom got up to say a few words, "I don't know what to say that hasn't already been said and that will hurt a little less, but I wrote a few words for my girl -
'You no longer greet me,
As I walk through the door.
You're not there to make me smile,
To make me laugh anymore.
Life seems quiet without you,
You were far more than a pet.
You were a family member, a friend,
A loving soul, I'll never forget...
It will take time to heal-
For the silence to go away.
I still listen for you,
And miss you everyday.
You were such a great companion,
Constant, loyal and true.
My heart will always wear,
the pawprints left by you'
-Timber, my girl, you will be missed" he concluded making everyone sob silently. I stood up and held Tom's hand. Before she was buried, I put my blue penguin, the one Tom gave me and the one she liked always and wouldn't sleep without it on her casket. "Thank you for the wonderful times, Puddles" I whispered before turning back to Tom and resting my head on his chest as he placed a long, soft kiss on the top of my head.
y/n_y/l/n - I heard Tom define heaven once, he looked at Timber, 'As a place where, when you get there, all the dogs you ever loved run to greet you' You will be missed Puddles... @timberlives
Sleep tight, Timber!
I'm not crying, my eyes are just sweating... 😭😢
Also, the poem was from Pinterest - I'm not good of a writer..
Also, if any of my readers ever lost a dog, I'm sorry and they're in a better place now. 🤗😇