The day was finally here, Trent was graduating from high school. Not that I didn't think he would, I knew he could do anything he set his mind to. But he far exceeded everyone else's expectations of him, and I was so proud. Nat and I were up in my room getting ready to go to the ceremony, my parents were taking us so we could watch Trent and Brayden walk. Natalia was so proud of Brayden, he was graduating and getting a scholarship to The College of New Jersey. He would be the first in his family to go to college, and he planned on getting custody of his siblings and setting a good example for them. Trent would be off to Rutgers in the fall, still undecided but I was so happy he was going. He would figure things out, I had no doubt.
"How do I look?" I asked Nat as I buttoned my dress shirt and adjusted the collar.
"Perfect! How do I look?" Nat twirled in her sundress and her curls bounced as she spun.
"Beautiful! Ready to go?" I asked.
"Yes!" Of course, my parents made a huge deal about how nice we looked. You would think it was our graduation, I didn't even want to imagine what our graduation was going to be like. We drove to the hospital to pick up Trent's father, he was doing really well with his program, so they gave him a day pass to come to the graduation. He was also coming to the graduation party my parents were throwing for them, but we had strict orders to bring him back if it was too much. My parents were a little nervous about bringing Mr. Rodriguez, and I didn't blame them. When we told them how he was in rehab they kind of flipped out, I had very conveniently left out that his dad had the heart attack because he drank too much.
"Grayson, why didn't you tell us?" My mom questioned as I sat with them at dinner one night.
"I didn't want you to come home early, or worry, or judge them..." I mumbled the last part.
"We warned you about Trent, we should have known it ran in the family," Dad grumbled.
"See, this is why I didn't tell you! You're judging them and you don't even know them. You've seen that Trent has really changed since we got together. You two aren't perfect either you know?"
"Grayson!" My father yelled.
"I'm not wrong. You don't know what Trent's family has been through, yet you're sitting here talking about how the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. I'm sick of you guys thinking Trent isn't good enough for me."
"We're sorry," My mom started to say something else but I cut her off.
"We're picking Trent's dad up from rehab to surprise him at graduation. That's the end of the discussion." I got up from the table and went to my room.
So here we were, heading to the wing of the hospital where Trent's dad was staying to pick him up. I was slightly nervous to be alone with Mr. Rodriguez, I mean Victor, without Trent. I just had to remind myself that he was a different person now, and to just breathe and stay in the moment. Use those grounding techniques Dr. Meyer taught me. We approached the check in desk and I saw Ryan standing talking with the receptionist. He smiled wide when he saw my Dad and I approach.
"Grayson! It's so good to see you!"
"Hey Ryan! This is my dad," I said gesturing to my father as he followed behind me.
"Jonathan," he introduced and held out his hand. Ryan shook it and introduced himself in return.
"Well, you ready to spring Victor out?"
"Ready as I'll ever be," I laughed nervously.
"It'll be fine Grayson! He's been doing amazing in his program, they've been working with him to prepare him to be at this party, I have total faith in him." I nodded and Ryan led us to Victor's room. "Knock, knock!" He said as we entered. Victor's face lit up when he saw me and I have to say it warmed my heart.
"Hi Grayson! You must be Mr. Daniels, I'm Victor Rodriguez," Victor said as he approached my dad. He held out his hand and they exchanged firm shakes.
"Jonathan," Dad said sternly.
"Thank you so much for doing this, it means the world to me. And I'm sure it will mean the world to Trent too."
Dad looked like he was going to say something unpleasant, so I jumped in before he could. "Of course, Victor. I can't wait to see Trent's reaction to you being there!"
"You're really a good kid Grayson, I'm sorry I let my ignorance and my addiction get the better of me."
"It's okay," I replied, taking a few deep breaths to calm myself. With everyone interaction I got more comfortable with Trent's dad though, and his demeanor now was really putting me at ease. He was warm and caring and I felt absolutely loved and accepted by him.
"Alright, we better get going Gray," My dad said.
"Ready?" I asked Victor, looking him up and down. He was in a black suit, with a red dress shirt and red and black Rutgers University tie. The suit was perfectly fitted, hugging all the right features. His hair was slicked back, and he was clean shaven. Victor really was attractive. He looked so much like Trent, except for the eyes. Trent has his mother's emerald green eyes. I looked to the picture on his nightstand. His mother really was beautiful, gorgeous dirty blonde hair, green eyes, a button nose that might have looked too small on anyone else but on her was perfect. Her smile was so wide and bright. It was hard to believe looking at that picture that she was in so much pain, enough to take her own life. I wished I could have met her, the woman who was so important to Trent, who made him the man he is today.
I shook those thoughts out of my head, and we made our way back out to the desk, where we had to sign some papers before we were allowed to leave. We piled back into my dad's car, me awkwardly squished between Nat and Victor. The drive to the arena was uncomfortable, no one really spoke much, I could tell my parents had nothing nice to say to Victor. I was glad they listened to Bambi and just didn't say anything at all. We quickly found seats when we arrive and waited for the ceremony to start.
The music started and the asked us to stand as the graduates entered the arena. I watched for Trent and Brayden as the students filed in. Everyone was cheering and calling their child's name as they walked in, and when I found Trent, we all started cheering. He turned and quickly found us, shocked to see me being so obnoxious and drawing so much attention to myself. When Trent saw who was standing on the other side of Nat, he stopped dead in his tracks, causing the student behind him to bump into him. A wide smile grew on his face and he waved to his dad. I saw him mouth a 'thank you' to me as he continued walking. I never thought I would see Trent have that reaction to his father.
The ceremony was a total snooze fest. Our superintendent spoke for far too long, followed by our principal talking about honor and integrity for far too long, and then the teacher that was voted to speak. The valedictorian had a pretty cute speech, but again, it was too damn long! Then our choir had to sing the song that was voted on by Trent's class as the graduation song. I could see Trent turn to Brayden a couple of rows behind him and make fun of the song. For some god forsaken reason the class chose "Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)" by Green Day. Finally, once all of that was over they started calling the graduates names. They had a few teachers lined up to read names. Our school had a graduating class of about 700, so we were going to be here a while.
Over an hour later and we were finally in the Ps. Ms. Reynolds had taken over calling names, and I was glad she was going to be the one to call Trent's name out. He had her for biology when he was a sophomore, and she was probably the most supportive adult in the building of us. She saw how far her came this past year and was proud of him. I didn't trust any other teacher to not sound shocked, bored, or disgusted reading out Trent's name.
"Amanda Ramos, Daniel Reissert," Ms. Reynold's called out as each student made their way across the stage. She would stop and shake a hand or hug a student that she knew. I saw Trent lined up at the bottom of the steps, made his way up and we all got to our feet to get ready for when his name was called. Even my parents looked excited for him. "Trent Rodriguez!" Ms. Reynold's called. She walked around the podium and gave him a huge hug; he looked a little uncomfortable but hugged her back. We were all cheering from the audience, the only ones, but we were cheering and calling his name.
"Yeah Trent!" I hollered as loud as I could, he turned to me and blew a kiss before he walked across the stage to Dr. Murphy, whose face grew hard as Trent approached. He shook his hand, handed him his diploma, and turned his tassel. Trent leaned in and said something to him, and I watched as Dr. Murphy's face turned from indifference to anger. Trent started laughing as he passed. I can only imagine what he said to him. But it didn't matter now. My man was a high school graduate, despite all the odds, and he was off to college in the fall.
"Oh, here comes Brayden!" Nat said, slapping my arm. I nudged my parents and pointed out Brayden to them so they knew to cheer. He didn't have anyone here supporting him, and I wanted to make sure he got just as much applause as we gave Trent.
"Brayden Turner," Ms. Reynold's called. We all stood up again and Nat screamed as loud as she could.
"That's my man!" She shouted as he walked the stage. "Get it baby!" He turned to where the noise was coming from and I swear he was crying as he waved at us. Thankfully the ceremony didn't last too much longer, and we were able to leave, everyone piling out of the arena to find their loved one for pictures and to give them flowers and teddy bears. The kids weren't allowed to bring their phones into the arena, they had to go through metal detectors to get in to make sure no one snuck a phone. So it was nearly impossible for everyone to locate their families. I scanned the crowd for Trent with no luck. There was a sea of students and no boyfriend to be found. I did unfortunately make eye contact with Kyle, who just nodded to me and kept looking for his family. I barely had a moment to process my confusion when I heard my name called from behind me.
"Grayson!" I turned and my smile grew as I saw Trent running toward me. I took off sprinting toward him and jumped into his arms.
"I'm so proud of you," I said as he spun me around. He put me down and crashed our lips together. Earning some scoffs and dirty looks from other parents. I just smiled against Trent's lips until I heard my dad clear his throat. "Sorry," I mumbled, cheeks tinged red with embarrassment.
"Son, I am so proud of you," Victor said, stepping forward to pull his son into a hug.
"Dad, how are you even here?" Trent asked as he hugged his dad tighter.
"The doctors let me out for good behavior. I'm coming back to Grayson's for the party too," he said with a wide smile. Trent's face fell.
"Is that a good idea?" He asked sternly.
"Trent, I'll be fine! I won't let anything mess up being here to celebrate your big day. You've worked hard and you earned this, and I am so proud of everything you've become."
"Thanks, Dad," Trent said through tears in his eyes.
"Alright, let's all take some pictures," Mom said once Brayden found his way to us. We took a million and one pictures, because my parents are my parents, and then we went to the cars to head home. Nat and I went with Trent and Brayden in Trent's car, which left Victor alone with my parents. I wasn't sure that was the best idea, but Trent said they'd be fine.
We got back to my house and guests started arriving shortly after. All of Trent and Brayden's friends were invited, the ones who weren't homophobic assholes that is. We let Trent's dad invite some people, he declined to invite extended family, he didn't want to ruin the celebration when they were no doubt not accepting. But Ryan and his husband Dave came. Dave is a middle school math teacher, and he was just as nice and just as attractive as Ryan. It made me smile looking at them and seeing the future Trent and I could have. Successful careers, a couple of dogs, talks of maybe someday having kids. I wondered if Trent thought the same thing looking at them interact with our parents. I hoped he did.
Later than night after dinner and cake, the group of us sat around a fire in the yard while the adults cleaned up from the day's festivities. Trent had his arm around me, hugging me close to his side. Nat and Brayden were next to me, and Toni, Dani and Sean were on the other side of the fire pit. We were talking excitedly about everyone's plans for next year. For a minute I got sad, thinking that it would just be me and Nat again next year. I wondered how I would cope without Trent to get me through. He wouldn't be able to protect me, I wouldn't be able to sneak kisses in the halls, and sit with him at lunch and tell him all about my stressful classes. But thinking about where he would be next year, how far he'd come, none of that mattered.
I also thought about how far I'd come. When this year started, I was a nervous wreck. I barely spoke to Nat let alone to anyone else. I was depressed, mildly suicidal, and coping with my pain in the most dangerous of ways. I didn't think ahead to my future husband and kids, because I didn't think that kind of happiness was out there for me. I thought I would stay alone forever, too afraid of being hurt and abused by someone else. Imagine where I would be now if Trent Rodriguez hadn't fought his way into my life? If I hadn't learned to let go of my past and pain and actively create a better future for myself.
"What are you thinking about, babe?" Trent asked as he nudged my shoulder.
"How grateful I am for you," I said, causing a huge smile to creep onto his face. "I would be a whole different person today without you. I'd still be the gay kid who got beat up, I'd still be Adam's victim, I'd possibly be dead. You literally save my life, Trent Rodriguez. I love you so much, and I'm so proud of the man you've become. And I'm so grateful for the person you've helped me become."
"I love you too, Grayson Daniels. More than you can ever know."
"You know," I said, taking a deep breath and gathering up the bravery to say what I was about to say. "Seeing Ryan and Dave today just had me thinking..."
"Thinking about?" Trent asked, an eyebrow slightly raised.
"Us, the future we could have together." I took his hand in mind and started playing with it lazily, avoiding making eye contact with him.
"I was thinking the same thing," he said, and my eyes shot up to meet his, wide with surprise.
"Really?"
"Yes, I want to spend the rest of my life with you Grayson. I want a million dogs and maybe a couple of kids when we're older, and I want to grow old with you and annoy you until the day I die."
"Good," I smirked. "Because you're stuck with me forever baby." Trent's smile grew wide, and he leaned down to connect our lips. I smiled into the kiss as Trent put his hand on the back of my neck to deepen the kiss.
"I love you," he whispered against my lips.
"I love you too," I whispered back. Pure bliss and happiness in both our eyes as we stared lovingly into each other's eyes. This was the happy ending I never thought I could have. I would go through it all again if it got me back to this point. I had my best friends around the fire, and my future husband on my arm. No matter what happened next year, I knew I would be okay.
A/N: This is it, the last chapter. I may write an epilogue if anyone is interested, but that is the end of To Learn To Let Go. This is the first book I've ever managed to complete. Writing has been a hobby of mine since I was a teenager, but I could never stick with one thing or one idea long enough to write a whole book. But I love Trent and Grayson so much that I came back to them years later to rewrite and complete their story. Thank you so much to anyone who has showed this book any love and support over the last year almost I've been writing it. I have another story called In Close Quarters that I'm currently working on and a few other ideas in the works as well. I hope you'll follow me and read my other work. Again, thank you all so much for the support. I can't believe this book is coming to an end. I hope you enjoyed reading this book as much as I enjoyed writing it!