A letter sent to Lyra-Jade Black from Andromeda Tonks, October 17th, 1976
Dear LJ,
First off, let's get the sappy stuff out of the way. I miss you, Little Lyra, so, so very much. I can't stand it that the last time we saw one another was over a year ago. I worry about you three so much, locked up in that house all summer long under her supervision. Things will change soon, LJ. We have to have hope. I know it may not seem like that right now. You are a smart girl, LJ, I'm sure you are aware that something is happening in our world.
Ted says that sometimes things just have to get worse before they can get better. He says we all just have to have hope right now.
Nymphadora grows each day, and she is starting to say proper sentences now. Her hair changes at least fifteen times an hour. I wish you could see her. I have a plan, a risky one, but a plan none the less. When is your next Hogsmeade weekend?
Sirius wrote me a few weeks ago. He told me everything, LJ. I understand why you are so upset, I would be too. He asked me to talk to you, but I'm not sure what I can say to make things better. Just remember this; he needs you more than he needs bloody air. You are the most important thing to that boy. I know it's hard to forgive, and even harder to forget, but just... remember that Sirius is a Gryffindor boy, and those blokes are usually dicks.
In this package I have more film for your camera (which I hope is still working, let me know if it isn't), some magazines I've gathered over the past summer, a hair scarf that, well I don't really know why I've put that in here, I guess it just looks like something you'd like, and a picture of Dora, like you asked for.
I love you, LJ. We have to hope that we will see each other soon. Try to work things out with Sirius, please, for me.
Love Andy Tonks, your favorite cousin (hopefully)
***
Year four, a November weekend, 1974
Remus set out to find Lyra-Jade after dinner that night.
On that November Saturday morning during breakfast, Sirius Black had watched from his respected Gryffindor table as an owl dropped off a letter right in front of his sister. Lyra-Jade was sitting at the Slytherin table near her younger brother and his friends as she did every couple of mornings, though she never spoke to them. She just sat, ate, then left.
When the red letter landed on her plate, her face became even paler than usual. Regulus froze, as did their older brother across the room. His friends noticed his demeanor and followed his gaze.
"Shit." James had muttered, his eyes going wide.
They had watched, along with the rest of the school, as the letter begun to scream cruel and horrid words at the girl, who just stared at the letter hovering at her eye level. Her younger brother had grabbed her arm, and her older one had stood up from his seat.
"...how DARE you, you ungrateful, foul child! How dare you speak to your cousin, that traitorous whore! I bet you didn't think I would find out, didn't you! Oh, you will receive the worst punishment imaginable when you return home this holiday! And if I find out that your disgrace of an older brother also had communication with that wench, oh you better believe..."
The letter had turned to flames. Lyra-Jade had not even noticed Sirius standing behind her.
Her and Regulus' heads had snapped to him.
The three just stared at one another. The Great Hall was completely silent, all eyes on the siblings.
Upon the common eye, Lyra-Jade 's face appeared as though nothing had just happened at all. But her brothers knew she was about to burst.
"Let's go," Sirius had said in a low voice, eyes on his sisters. He held out his hand to her and she took it and got up. The small hand was trembling.
Regulus made to get up as well, but a look from Sirius made him sit make down. All eyes on them, the two walked out of the Great Hall, hand in hand.
The others hadn't known where they went until later that day. The three were sitting in their common room, their hearts racing with worry for their friend. Sirius had entered alone.
He explained that he had taken his sister to her room, which he knew would be empty. She's okay. She'll be okay. Just scared, he had told them
What he didn't tell them is that as soon as they entered her empty dorm room, Lyra-Jade had screamed and screamed and screamed. She had grabbed a book from her desk and had thrown in across the room. She screamed and screamed and screamed and yanked at her hair. But no tears came out of her grey eyes. No, never tears.
He didn't tell them that he had to wrap his arms around her body so she wouldn't hurt herself.
He didn't tell them that he held her for hours and caressed her hair to calm her down. Or how she kept on whispering in his shoulder, "We can't go back."
No, she didn't cry. But he did.
He told them that she didn't want to leave her room, and that they should all just go to dinner.
Remus knew all the spots she would usually hide, her favorite being near the dock on the Black Lake, parallel to the Forbidden Forest. He always wondered why she liked being near the lake, despite her fear of water.
He walked down the path leading down to the lake, his calf muscles still aching from the days before when he had shed his skin and became a beast. The sun was beginning to set, he noted, and the wind was beginning to breeze its way across the campus.
He spotted a head of dark hair right where he knew she would be. He observed her from a distance for a moment, not sure if she wanted to be alone or not. She was leaning against a large oak tree, nursing a cigarette, and caressing the black cat in her lap. He could tell that she was shivering beneath her robes.
He decided to walk over to her. she felt his presence when he was only a few feet away from where she sat.
"Hiya, Moons." She said, her voice quite raspy. What he didn't know was that it was from her screams.
"Hi." He sat beside her. Apollo jumped from her lap to his and he smiled down at the old cat, stroking his fur.
Lyra-Jade took a long drag and sighed. The two didn't speak for a while, just stared out at the dying sun in companionable, comfortable silence.
After a while, she rested her head against Remus' arm. He removed his hand from the cat and wrapped his arm around the small girl.
"Are you okay?" He whispered. He didn't know why he was whispering.
"When am I ever okay." She whispered in his arm.
"LJ-"
"Just sit here with me, please, let's just sit peacefully and watch ."
"You cannot find peace by avoiding life..." he quoted.
"Who said that?"
"Virginia Woolf. A muggle poet."
"Ah."
He had peered out at the lake. "Why do you hate the water?"
She looked at him. "Just do."
They sat and observed the sun going down and the colors that sprung across the sky. They watched the lake and it's creatures. It must have been an hour that they just sat there in silence, holding one another, for soon it became dark.
Lyra-Jade broke the silence, "I wonder how she found out."
"About you talking to your cousin?" He knew all about Andromeda and Lyra-Jade's close relationship, which was also a very secret relationship.
"I love my cousin Andy," She had told him a few years back, "I love her very much. We are forbidden from seeing her, though. Can't even bring her up without getting hexed."
He had winced. "How come?"
"Last year, she married a Muggle-Born. Nice bloke, from what I've heard, never actually met him, though. Anyways, she fell in love with him here, at Hogwarts, and when they graduated, she ran off with him to get married. My Aunt Druella went mental. Nearly burnt her house down, according to Cissy. She told my mom that she wanted to die rather than face the shame. Rubbish.
"Anyways, she still writes Siri and I, of course. She always loved us as much as we did her. She can only write us at Hogwarts, though, so Mum doesn't find out. You know that camera we have? She sent us that for Christmas last year. She always sends me Muggle magazines and tells me all about Muggle fashion and celebrities and stuff, it's great. She's living a great life, i suppose. I can tell she's still sad, though. She misses Cissy. I can tell. They were close. Not so much Bella, though."
"Oh and I almost forgot!" She had yelped suddenly, moving her body towards Remus and holding his shoulders, "She's going have a little baby! She just told me that she found out she's pregnant a few weeks ago! How cool is that?"
"Yeah, that's cool." He had smiled.
"I hope it's a girl. Then I can buy her dresses and bows and pretty little things. Maybe we can sneak out one night to meet her."
"Yeah. I wonder how she's knows I've been talking to her, but not Sirius." He wasn't sure what to say.
"LJ, curfew is soon," Remus whispered to her.
She sighed, "Just a little longer".
"LJ, we'll get in trouble."
"Fine."
Oh no, he thought, now I've made her mad. But as she stood up, she looked down at him with a sad smile and held out her hand. He took it and he followed her movements. Apollo purred at their feet.
"Let's just have a little walk around the lake. Just for a little?"
"Okay."
Still hand in hand, they began to walk the edge of the lake. "Moony?"
"Yes?"
"I'm scared."
He squeezed her hand, "LJ, somehow we will figure it out, okay? You can stay at the Potters or my house this Christmas! Maybe your parents will find something better to worry about and forget! And Sirius wouldn't let anything bad happen, okay?" He stopped walking and took her shoulder in his hands, making her face him. "It'll be okay."
It wouldn't, and she knew it. She was the one that tried to not let bad things happen. And she couldn't do that while being hexed. But the hopeful spark in his eyes made her not say the inevitable truth.
She smiled up and him and wrapped her arms around his torso. He held her back. "Moony," she whispered in his chest.
"Yes?"
She suddenly moved back to face him. He already missed her touch.
"Scream." She told him.
"Huh?"
"Scream. Just scream. No one can hear."
"Scream?" He gave her a suspicious look that said, 'Are you nuts?'.
Oh darling, I've been nuts for a while. Took you long enough to find out.
"Yes, silly. Scream. No one can hear from her, trust me."
"How do you know?"
"This is where I come for my monthly screaming fits."
"Seriously?"
"Siriusly."
They shared a light giggle.
"Scream your secrets," she continued, "Let them out in the air. Let the wind carry them away to the sky and the moon and the stars. The stars won't tell a soul, I promise."
She began to sway her body in an eerie yet enchanting way. The moonlight illumined her pale face and her dark waves. Beautiful.
Anyone else would stare at her, call her a nutter. But to him, oh, she was anything but a nutter. She was incredible.
"Okay."
"Go on then." She flashed him one of her rare smiles and began to twirl in circles.
"Scream... a secret?"
"Yup." Spin, spin, spin.
He hesitated.
She stopped spinning. "Want me to start?"
He nodded.
She sucked in a breathe, "I HATE MY FUCKING MOTHER MORE THAN ANYTHING."
He just looked at her with his mouth agape. She was very loud, surely someone could hear?
She turned to him, "There, now you go Moony."
He took a deep breath. "I'm-I'm a werewolf." He said in his regular voice.
"Louder!"
"I'm a werewolf!"
"LOUDER!"
"I"M A FUCKING WEREWOLF AND I DON'T CARE WHO FUCKING KNOWS IT!" Even louder than she was.
"There you go Moony!" She clapped and started dancing around his body, her bare feet coding with mud from the damp grass and her hands moving across his chest and back. "My turn! MY BEST FRIEND IS A FUCKING WEREWOLF AND GUESS WHAT? ITS FUCKING COOL!"
His eyes widened. "I..I'm your best friend?"
"No Snivellous is," she snorted, "'Course you are Moony. Now another one!"
***
"If the moon smiled, she would resemble you. you leave the same impressions of something beautiful, but annihilating."