Vanessa Vaughen
"That doesn't make any sense, why would Kaufman just leave?"
"V, I'm not sure, but something's up. I'll have him come back to the CCPA here in New York and I'll see what's the matter, until then, the mission is still on."
"But Bourne, we don't have a driver now."
"Giselle and Charlie will handle the van, I'm sure you all have your license."
Vanessa shook her head even though Bourne couldn't see her. "No, you see, Kaufman took the van with him, we don't know where he is or if he'll return it."
She could hear a pause on the other end, it meant that Bourne was trying to wrap his head around the situation.
"No van? Yeah... something's definitely up. I've just sent him an invoice, I'll see what the real issue is as soon as he comes back. We're tracking the van from here also, looks like he's already on the move."
"Bourne, we don't have a tech van, how are we supposed to continue with the mission?"
"I'm not sure, Vanessa. I'll ask for someone to book you a rental for a bit. I'll also be in contact with Charlie and Giselle to see if their systems can be set back to normal."
"Okay, sounds good."
"Gosh, sometimes I wonder why nothing ever rides smoothly during these missions."
She's heard that stressful tone of voice more than once throughout her career. It seemed like every time there was a new mission to solve, his emotions would come crashing down eventually.
"Hey Bourne," Vanessa switched the phone to the other ear and tucked it under her chin, she stared out the huge window that overlooked the rest of the beachfront town.
"What?" He responded sounding more tired.
"It's going to be alright. God is in control, remember?"
"Yeah... yeah, I remember." Although his voice made Vanessa doubt something inside.
"Good. Hey, thanks, we'll keep in touch."
"Of course, until next time."
The call ended abruptly but Vanessa didn't mind. The sun was already awake and shining over the palm trees. She could see the colourful beach umbrellas line the shore of the water, people were already out and surfing on boards. Some were riding bikes off of the pier in the distance. Ice cream stands were being set up and a few food trucks kept stopping by.
"Knock-knock."
"Oh, hey," Vanessa turned and saw Giselle enter her room.
"Matt said the door was unlocked and you were still talking to Bourne."
"Yeah, I just got off of the phone with him."
"So, what's the verdict? Anything on Kaufman?"
Vanessa shrugged. "He doesn't know much, I mean, none of us do. Kaufman going MIA and running off with our tech van like that really puts a damper on the mission."
"How's Bourne doing with all of this?"
"I can tell he's stressed."
Giselle sighed. "I probably shouldn't be saying this, but there was a rumour going around that he was thinking of retiring."
Vanessa was shocked at the words. "Bourne? Retiring? He never said anything about that."
Giselle shrugged. "There's a point in time where you need to slow down. I mean, when is the last time you've seen Bourne slow down?"
Vanessa's face still had the immense surprise of Giselle's words plastered on her face. "Exactly, Bourne is the type of guy to just go full speed ahead and live every day to the fullest trying to prove justice in this world."
"I know, it's almost unimaginable to even think that he might someday have to let go."
Vanessa looked at her friend, she could tell she was hinting at something. "Yeah... I mean, I've worked with him for the past six years, I don't know how someone else could run the CCPA as he did."
Giselle leaned against the window they were staring down. "I've heard people talk, everyone thinks he's going to nominate someone to take his position once he steps down. The team back at the CCPA have been keeping me in touch with the recent office drama."
Vanessa caught her hint. Giselle never looked someone in the eye whenever she was gossiping, and even though she hadn't said anything, Vanessa could tell that she was trying to direct some clue to her.
"Well, who do they think he's nominating? Surely someone who's somewhat close to him."
"Yeah... it's a shame that he has no known family. The guy doesn't talk about his personal life that much, but from what I know about him, he's had no one his whole life."
"No wife, no kids for sure... I never really understood that."
"He's a workaholic, as they say."
"So... who do they think he's going to nominate?"
Giselle looked at her, Vanessa had to bite her tongue to keep her from smiling like crazy.
She shrugged. "Well, all we know is that they're really close with him apparently. Worked with him a few times here and there."
"Mhmm..." Vanessa was getting excited, she knew that Giselle was terrible at hints.
Six whole years I've worked at the CCPA and with Bourne, I've worked my way up fair and square through the building, he knows that better than anyone!
"Yeah, a lot of our fellow co-workers think it's going to be Matt."
Vanessa's thoughts came to a halt, her face drooped from the excited eagerness to a sad surprise.
Giselle must have caught on to her sudden emotional dive. "What is it?"
"Perry-Benson? People think Bourne's going to promote HIM?!"
"W-Well, yeah, I don't know."
"I can't believe this!" Vanessa started to walk across the large bedroom.
"V, what's wrong?" Giselle followed her.
"What's wrong? Nobody knows a thing about this guy! This is insane! Why would people think that?!"
"Whoa, Vannie, it's just a rumour I heard from a few of those chit-chatty ladies a few floors down."
Vanessa felt like throwing something at the wall, the vase on the coffee table looked especially perfect at that moment.
"I don't understand where all of this is coming from, V. What's wrong?"
"You can't see it, can you? Bourne just hires this guy out of nowhere and expects me to trust him and work with him, I even have to live with this guy!"
"Okay, I understand but-"
"No! No you don't! Nobody does! Not you, not Charlie, not Bourne and especially not Matthew! I've put everything I am into my career, into the CCPA, and if anyone is to deserve this promotion, it's me! Bourne should see that!"
Once Vanessa turned around she saw her best friend standing with her arms cross, sudden humiliation washed over her.
"Okay, I have no idea what's going on inside this room when I'm not here, nor do I know what's going inside your own head at this point, but I can tell you one thing for sure, this mission is hard for all of us, and it isn't getting any easier. I don't know what kind of stress you're going through personally, but I can tell that whatever kind of outburst that was wasn't coming from a good place, so will you just calm down, take a breath and return back to the Vanessa I know?"
Tears started to well up inside of Vanessa, her emotions were running wild. She nodded and plopped down on the couch. Giselle seemed to calm down too, she came over, sat beside her and wrapped her arms around Vanessa.
Giselle's voice was gentle and quiet once they had a chance to hug it out. "V, what's really going on? I know you don't believe in rumours, so what is this really about?"
Vanessa's few outbursts of tears trickled down her cheeks until her hand caught them before they fell from her face. "I-I just don't get where God is going with all of this. It's too stressful, too awkward, too hard... It's just too hard."
Giselle still had her arms wrapped around her tightly, Vanessa leaned her head onto her shoulder and closed her eyes. "I know, V. It's getting to you, isn't it."
"I don't know why or how this is happening. Something about this mission that's just getting too complicated and it's messing everything up."
Suddenly the door opened again and shut, Matt came wandering in. "Hey, breakfast just ended but I brought a few muffins in case you wanted to- oh-"
He paused when he saw the two ladies on the couch. Vanessa's eyes were still shut tight. Matthew gave Giselle a look that pointed towards the crying woman in her arms. Giselle just gave a warm smile back and nodded.
"You going to be okay?" Giselle whispered in Vanessa's ear.
Vanessa inhaled a shaky breath and wiped the few tears that still seemed to make their way out. "Yeah," she whispered, "thank you."
Giselle gave her one last squeeze and told her that she would be by the pool all afternoon and would have her phone with her.
She left the two of them alone. Silence filled the open space between Vanessa and Matt very quickly.
"I, uh, didn't know which one you liked, so I got all of them."
Vanessa looked at the plate of delicious-looking muffins, she could already taste them from here. "Thank you."
"There's chocolate, blueberry, banana and some kind of pink berry one, I don't know, I didn't read the sign."
Vanessa tried to smile, but her body wasn't obeying. She just looked down to avoid his eyes.
"You okay?" He asked, slowly making an approach towards her.
"Yeah..." she sniffed.
"You sure?"
Vanessa looked up at him, was he really trying to be kind towards her?
She looked back down again, feeling guilty for all of the things she said and thought about him. Shaking her head, feeling the warm tears start to make their way out again. "No, I'm not."
"I know it's not any of my business, but uh, you want to talk about it?"
She looked up at him, expecting him to joke off, but she realized he was being serious about it.
"I'm just feeling a little discouraged I guess," she grabbed her sleeve and wiped her cheeks.
"Wait right here..."
He ducked into the bedroom but came out with something in his hands.
"What's that?" She asked.
"My Bible," he came over and sat across from her on one of the singular chairs.
"You own a Bible?"
"Uh... well, yes, you don't?"
"No, I mean, I do, I'm just surprised."
"That I have a Bible..?"
Vanessa blinked. "No, I mean, of course not, that'd make perfectly good sense that you have a Bible and you are definitely a Christian because you work for a Christian company."
Luckily Matt just chuckled and looked down at the book in his hands. "Yes, I am a Christian."
Vanessa nodded, taking note to never say something so dumb like that ever again. Why did she even ramble like that? Her brain felt all mixed up at the moment.
"Bourne told me a passage before we started this mission, once we got off of the jet."
"What'd he say?"
"He just said to not forget about Joshua 1:9, I'd figure there couldn't be a better time than now to crack open the Good Word and figure out what he's talking about."
Matthew flipped the pages until he found the book of Joshua. Vanessa leaned back and watched as he found the right verse.
"Here we go, Joshua 1:9: 'Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go."
After he read the singular line he stared at the words. Vanessa thought on the verse as a comfortable silence started to fall on them.
"Wow," Vanessa whispered, "that's a pretty good verse."
Matthew nodded, looking up at her. "Yeah, and at a very needed time, too."
Vanessa smiled at his words. For the first time throughout the past week, she could finally say that she had looked at him in a different light.
"You know, I don't know a lot about you, Vanessa, but I think this is a good time to pray."
At first, she looked at him to see if he was serious, then she nodded, accepting the invitation to pray together. She sat up and bowed her head, folding her hands in her lap.
She could tell there was a different type of strength in his voice when he prayed. Even though he was asking God for direction and peace in everyone's hearts, there was something about him when he prayed that felt so opposed to the way she saw him before.
Maybe it was just how she was looking at him, not with any sort of love the way Jesus does. She just saw him as this stranger, this guy who wanted to replace her in the agency. Although she knew now, things had changed. Her perspective of him had changed.
She saw him in a light nobody else had seen: A man of God.
He ended their prayer with an 'Amen' and immediately Vanessa felt better.
"I know God is with us during this mission, and I know God will continue to be with us as we move on. There's no need for us to be afraid if we just stick with Him."
Vanessa nodded. "Thank you, Matt, for showing me that verse."
Matt looked her in the eyes and smiled back, shrugging. "Hey, any time."
A/N
Joshua 1:9
"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go."
Faith > fear