♊︎Year 5067, Month 5, Day 24, Time 4:26 am♊︎
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"What the hell—?" Loud banging on the door to her right wakes her up rather brusquely from where she was restlessly sleeping in one of Jongho's many cars. The garage was quite wide and long and had enough space to fit at least 10 cars, 15 at most— if you don't include motorbikes.
When she had come back from Answer District, she was too distraught to make it to her room, opting for the closest option which would be to sleep in one of the cars. After all, she had to return the "borrowed" motorbike to Jongho's collection, might as well borrow a car, too.
She didn't know what time it was when she came back, only caring about putting distance between herself and the crime scene. All she cared about when she got back to the dorms was to escape the mental purgatory she was in through sleep. But even that proved to be of little effect, only managing to sleep for an hour before being woken up.
Her anxiety spikes for a moment before she realizes that it's just Candy banging on the car door, calling her name, and stirring her awake rather unethically.
"Hey, we've been looking all over for you. Where have you been?" Kurenai attempts to rub the tiredness out of her eyes, yawning and stretching as best she can in the small seat of the car while also opening the car door to meet Candy.
Hoping that she could at least wait till dawn to have to face her team members, the tattooed woman quickly realizes that she no longer has that option open.
"Have you been out here all night?" Forced to answer, Kurenai says the first thing that comes to mind.
"Yeah, I couldn't sleep in my room. It was cozy in the car." Candy eats up the excuse and the tattooed woman assumes that she's in the clear that is until she sees the man Candy was with.
Stepping out of the car and into the open, Kurenai catches sight of the man accompanying Candy while on the search for her. The moment their eyes make contact she can feel an accusing glare directed toward her.
The exact man she was dreading to face has found her.
"Is that the only reason you fell asleep here?" He presses. Kurenai panics internally but keeps a flawlessly calm and collected exterior that she's not even sure how she manages in front of the personal subject of the man she just killed.
"It is." She responds in a flat tone, holding her eye contact with the raven-haired man. They keep their eye contact for a few more passing seconds until the tension becomes unbearable for the both of them.
Candy looks back and forth between the two, noticing how both of their bodies have stiffened up in case one attacks the other, and decides that she'll have to lessen the tension.
"Okay, well, you had your reasons and I'm sure you're probably not comfortable enough to share them with us, so how about we get back to the dorms and tell everyone you're back?" The shorter woman suggests and Kurenai agrees reluctantly. She'll have to face the members at some point; it's better to make it sooner than later.
"Let's head back then." Moving ahead of the two people that came for her, Kurenai can feel Seonghwa's invasive eyes heavily pinned on her back. Guilt and shame trickle into her heart, making it feel as heavy as lead in her chest.
But what hurts the most isn't the accusing glare of his piercing eyes, it's the underlying emotion that seeps through his harsh stare. The deep sadness and loss that's barely visible but to her, it feels like the biggest mark on his face.
He must've heard by now what happened to Max. She can only hope now that he finds some sort of comfort after losing his assigned Meister.
She battles with herself, on whether or not to hang back to speak with him but the moment she glances his back in his direction he's already caught on to her action, surprising her.
"I don't want condolences. Not from the likes of you." He snarls at her, speeding up to push past her rather forcefully and leaving her behind with a perplexed Candy.
"What's his deal?" She asks Kurenai but the tattooed woman doesn't answer, keeping a stoic expression and a taciturn disposition as she watches Seonghwa's figure walk away from the pair. Candy is left clueless as ever, looking back and forth between the two once again and clearing her throat to gain Kurenai's attention. "So, um, have you heard the news?" The taller woman snaps her head in the shorter one's direction.
"What news?"
"About Max's passing?" Taking in a sharp breath, Kurenai's mind recounts all of the events of the night before, up until she shot The Chemist. Even the gruesome picture of his lifeless body slumped down on his chair with his crimson-colored blood snaking its way down his body from the wound on his skull is still ingrained in her head.
"Oh, that news." She fakes her obliviousness. "No, I haven't heard it. What time did the report come in?"
"Mm, like around 10:40 last night. That's when we went to look for you in your room because the dorm's T.V. went off making everyone come out of their rooms." Candy pauses, peeking over at Kurenai as she walks with a heavy expression. "When did you sneak out of your room to get to the car?"
"I dunno, 10-ish?" There isn't a change in Kurenai's demeanor but something still tells Candy that she's lying. She's known Ursula, the best con artist, long enough to know when someone's lying, and Kurenai definitely is.
The two women make it to the elevator, passing the infirmary with glass window panes to look into on the way and seeing Seonghwa swipe some materials off his desk in the heat of anger.
They can't hear the crashing sounds and sobbing on their side of the windows and Candy refuses to look at her teammate while he mourns his Meister's death, but Kurenai's eyes are glued onto him.
Her heart becomes laced with pain and pity for the man, watching him slump down on his stool and bury his face in his hands as his shoulder shake.
It was a scene that, before she knew who he was to her, would've gone by and she wouldn't have batted an eye, but now that she knows their intertwined past, she can't help but try to empathize with him. Once again, she now realizes that she's hurt him too far to help.
"Um, Kurenai?" Candy's voice rips her out of the pit of endless thoughts she had fallen into, redirecting her attention to the elevator Candy was waiting for her in. She quickly catches up, entering the elevator and pressing the button to their dorms.
"Do you happen to know who filed the report?" Kurenai probes, looking over at Candy who had been staring at her conspicuously. Candy furrows her brows, thinking back to when the announcement was made.
"Were not exactly sure. Someone apparently came across the body and called the Meisters right after. We think it might be someone trying to take down MALUS on the inside. We were placed on lockdown for three hours while you were gone." Candy brings a hand up to tap on her bottom lip. "Now that I think of it, both you and Seonghwa were missing."
Quirking an eyebrow in the brown-haired girl's direction, Kurenai feels her skin grow cold and her palms sweaty as she notices the suspicious look creeping onto the shorter girl's face.
"What is it now?" She mumbles.
"Are you and Seonghwa like... a thing?" Candy's eyes light up like Christmas lights at the possibility of finding something like this out meanwhile Kurenai's face contorts into a disgusted grimace.
"You've got to be kidding me." The tattooed woman rubs her head, almost gagging at the thought of her and Seonghwa in that way. "Where did you even get that idea from? I broke his freaking arm for Christ's sake!"
"I know," The shorter girl breaks out in a fit of endearing giggles. "I just wanted to see what you're reaction would be."
Frowning down at her, Kurenai crosses her arms grumpily, trying to hide the small smile that's threatening to give way. She could see now why someone like Yeosang fell for her, him being the kind who barely even speaks to others; it also makes sense how she and Candy used to be best friends.
It almost makes her wonder if Candy still remembers their past or not...
She shakes the thought out of her head, brushing it off as impossible. Not even she remembers their friendship, who's to say Max was just playing a mind game on her? But then, again, he had been the one to give her the files in the first place even though it was indirectly. There was no real reason for him to lie about something like that.
"You know, I am really curious about why you chose to sleep in the car. You could've chosen so many places but instead, you chose a car." Candy continues to laugh. "It's a peculiar choice."
"I guess it was." Kurenai agrees to not have to make up another lie. "A peculiar choice for a peculiar person, is it not?" She continues to make small talk while waiting for the elevator to arrive at the top level when she notices that Candy hasn't pressed any of the buttons.
Looking over at Candy with furrowed brows, Kurenai reaches out to click on a button but Candy's hand comes down on hers too fast for her to snatch it back. The tattooed woman struggles for a bit as she tries to force her arm that's just inches away from clicking the elevator button, deeply unsettled by the amount of strength Candy carries in her arm. Kurenai takes a deep breath.
"Let me go, please." She asks in a neutral tone, swallowing down the unsettling feeling in the pit of her stomach. She can see Candy's face torn between letting her go and trying to string words together to ask something but Kurenai's patience begins to run short the longer the shorter girl holds on to her arm. "Candy, if you don't let go of me right now, I will do something that will most likely end with you in extreme pain—."
"Wait, just— let me just ask you one more thing before we go back up there." At this, Kurenai's interest is piqued, so much that it almost overrides her will to get out of this tiny compartment and far away from the man that lies on the other side of these elevator doors, probably still mourning in the infirmary.
"Fine, but press the damn button. You have until we arrive at our dorms to ask what you need." The tattooed woman finally interposed and Candy accepts, letting go of Kurenai's arm and clicking the button while asking her the question she was so curious about.
"Why don't you trust any of us?" Hugging her hand close her, Kurenai rubs at the part where Candy was holding onto her, internally rolling her eyes at the question.
"Is that what you want to know? You scared me half to death just to ask why I don't trust people?"
"Not why you don't trust people; why you don't trust us, is what I'm asking. We're you're team." The girl clarifies for her, waiting patiently for the other's answer.
"It's not a good idea to probe in people's personal spaces."
"But it's not only you're problem. It's mine as well." Kurenai groans internally, starting to get fed up with Candy's incessant probing, but decides that the faster she answers the faster she'll be able to get away from her questioning.
"People aren't always what they seem, you know. And I've always been alone, I want to keep it that way as long as I can. It keeps people from stabbing you in back if you never gave them your back in the first place." Candy tilts her head.
"But we're you're team. And we're subjects. It's our job to have each other's backs, so why are you so against it?" She pokes further, beginning to dig a little too far for her own good. Her curiosity has led her to a part that Kurenai has always refused to confront about herself, and it's irking her that this new girl has started to poke her nose in personal places.
"As I said, people aren't trustworthy. Even if we're all a team, the moment one of the Meisters asks you to kill another one of us, whatever 'bond' we had is stultified." Kurenai explains as the elevator goes up. "And in this world, our Meisters' words are law."
"It's not healthy to live that way." Candy pushes. "We all need someone to lean on. Someone to trust."
"Well, I don't have any of that. I prefer not to."
"And why not? It won't hurt you to try." The short girl tries to convince the tattooed woman. "We can trust each other."
"Easy for you to say." Kurenai scoffs, crossing her arms.
"Just try. You won't know what it's like to trust if you don't trust. It won't hurt you."
"Oh, but it will. Candy, trusting people may be easy for you because of all the supportive people in your life. You have Evan and Yeosang which is twice as many as me. I have no one but myself to trust out there and I've grown up that way, so no, I'm not just gonna throw my trust around like a rag doll and hope I don't get hurt." Kurenai waves her hands for extra emphasis, groaning when Candy presses on with her ideas of trust and teams.
It seems that everyone these days share in these ludicrous ideas. How naive.
"I know it'll take you time to open up and all, but we all really want to know you better. And I'm not just saying this because I have people that I trust completely, but because I want to be there for you. We're a team now and all we have is each other, let me be there for you!" She pleas, grabbing onto one of Kurenai's arms and shaking it slightly.
"You don't even see how stupid you sound," Kurenai laughs humorlessly. "I said no. I'm not gonna play pretend at being your friend or trusting you just because we're a team."
"But we're family now."
"NO, WE'RE NOT!" The tattooed woman roars, her last bits of patience having run out. Shrinking away, Candy let's go of Kurenai's arm, her bottom lip quivering at the sudden burst of ferocity. "Family doesn't exist amongst killers like us!"
The second Kurenai sees Candy's expression, she regrets raising her voice so rudely. At the same moment, the elevator arrives at the floor of their dorm, the doors slowly opening as if to stretch out the awkward atmospheres that's settled between the two women.
Finally opening, the doors become wide enough for Kurenai to slip through but before she does she catches the small words coming from Candy's mouth.
"Even if you don't trust me, I trust you." Kurenai scowls at the words she hears, stopping briefly to answer back curtly.
"Well then don't come crying if that trust stabs your ass behind your back." Turning back around, Kurenai continues to make her way through the dorms with no specific destination, ignoring the men calling out to her and asking her where she's been and even rudely slapping Mingi's hand away when he comes close to her.
"Don't touch me." She seethes through her teeth, startling the model more than was necessary. All of the members except for Seonghwa take in her enraged character, watching as she storms off to the door leading to the secret staircase connected to the dorms if the elevator breaks down.
None of them grow the courage to ask her what's wrong directly, assuming and whispering among themselves what must've happened which pisses Kurenai off more.
She opens and slams the door behind her once she's arrived at the secret staircase, stomping all the way up to access the rooftop where she usually goes when she wants complete exclusion from the team.
The minute she throws open the rooftop door the icy wind hits her face, freezing the frustrated tears that had appeared surreptitiously on her face. Candy had knocked on a door that a Kurenai had wished no one would knock on, asking such invasive questions she wished to avoid.
It was a part of herself she wished to go untouched and unquestioned, avoiding it completely. She's not even sure why she's so distrustful and the events that have passed recently don't help out her case.
Deep down, she knows she was wrong for saying something so hurtful to the other girl but it needed to be said.
There's is no such thing as 'friends' or 'family' in this criminal underworld. That's for weaklings. If you want to survive in MALUS for as long as you can, you must trust no one.
Not even the Meisters.
And sadly, that's something Candy just can't understand. Not when she has her dad and Yeosang at her beck and call.
Kurenai hadn't meant what she said about being stabbed in the back by someone she trusts, but she really hopes that's not what it takes to make Candy realize how broken and constricted this world of criminals is.