𝐩𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐨𝐩𝐡𝐨𝐛𝐢𝐚 || 𝘳...

By iloveseattleellie

2.5M 84.9K 98K

philophobia-the fear of falling in love or becoming emotionally connected to someone... ~~~ This is a stor... More

𝐎𝐍𝐄,, sorry
001. when the party's over
002. minister's fancy balls
003. regulus black + champagne
004. clarissa and danielle
005. potions
006. the astronomy tower
007. butter-beer
008. the whomping willow
009. transfiguration
010. the broom cupboard
011. detention
012. the black lake
013. skipping school with regulus black
014. gryffindor vs slytherin
015. james and lily
016. denial
017. jealous?
018. love is irrelevant
019. why?
020. petunia evans
021. muggle day
022. christmas at the potters
023. christmas at the blacks
024. maniacal
025. sirius' advice
026. what happens now?
027. the marauders map
028. hogsmead with regulus black
029. muggle studies
030. the first fatality
031. remus' eighteenth birthday
032. tom riddle
033. rain
034. end of year exams
035. the last big prank
036. spain
037. france
038. paris
039. james and regulus
040. stupid
042. the quidditch world cup
043. someday
044. guilty pleasure
045. broken
a c t t w o || h i r a e t h
046. silence
047. jamie diggory
048. kinda possessive?
049. secrets and lies
050. heaven
051. bad dreams & siblings
052. like brother like sister
053. shower in the storm
054. love?
055. can't handle change
056. gone?
057. the cottage on the hills
058. malfoy manor
059. the order of the phoenix
060. crazy in love
061. disowned with nowhere else to go
062. desire
063. horcruxes
064. the piano
065. like it was before
066. frustrated?
067. after the after party
068. bad good dreams
069. the restricted section
070. bathrooms & booze
071. unrequited or requited love
072. a fox & a vixen
073. late nights & fire whiskey
074. wedding preparations
075. alice and frank's wedding
076. tough girl
077. promises cannot be kept in war
078. christmas
079. james' special surprise
080. babysitting
081. fear of losing you
082. in it forever
083. new year revelations
084. st mungos hospital
085. remember that night
086. a new enemy made
087. back again
088. liar
089. the attack in the castle
090. feeling nostalgic
091. tears & fire-whisky
092. i miss you
093. prove it
094. the end of an era
095. regulus' eighteenth birthday
096. hate to do this on your birthday
a c t t h r e e || a d o m a n i a
097. the morning
098. as you wish
099. the bride to be
100. james and lily's wedding
101. an unexpected turn for the worst
102. the months that followed
103. wake up
104. please
105. promises
106. hangovers & coffee
107. take you out
108. confronting nightmares
109. girls night
110. christmas, 1979
111. warnings
112. new years eve, 1979
113. sick
114. life without you
115. to keep you off my mind
116. best friend's kiss all the time...right?
117. fabian & gideon
118. funerals
119. devoted to you
120. prophecy
121. june 30, 1980
122. anger
123. deceived
124. neville
125. empty promised
126. harry james potter
𝐀𝐂𝐓 𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑,, love & war
127. a sense of normality
128. undercover
129. the lemonade
130. potentially incredibly stupid
131. airport
132. the beach
133. moments
134. blurred lines
135. mother and father
136. honesty
137. you've already lost
138. tied to you
139. party crashers
140. merlin's beautiful balls
141. cursed birthdays
142. close calls
143. marlene and dorcas
144. a spy?
145. calm before the storm
146. the fall
147. red
EPILOGUE
SEQUEL

041. the mark

21K 679 899
By iloveseattleellie


S O R R Y

xli||the mark










Waking up groggily, Regulus sits up in his messy sheets, hearing loud voices from downstairs, he instantly recognises one as his delightful cousin Bellatrix and then her husband Rodolphus. He runs a hand through his hair that seems much longer and even more messy than a week ago when Maria was running her hands through it. He rubs his sleepy eyes, truth is, Regulus hasn't had much sleep since that night in Paris, maybe it's the burning sensation in his gut that just keeps reminding him he's getting the dark mark any moment between right now and the first of August, or maybe it's because he isn't with her.

He wonders what will happen after.

After he has the mark, after his parents announce his and some pure blood Princess' engagement, after her. Because he knows if he is still alive, there will be an after. Because, no matter how much he loves her and how much she loves him it will always end in a tragedy. Some part of him wonders what the point is, if they're both going to end up hurt by the end of it they may as well just end it now, but then another part of him says that above everything she is the only thing he cares about right now. Not even his life could ever compare to hers in his eyes.

He runs hands through his dark hair and slips a sweatshirt over his bare upper body, sliding into some sweatpants and going to shower, daydreaming about how he'd feel if he walked in and saw Maria stood waiting. But she wasn't. Of course, it's not a surprise, he just hoped that if he maybe repeated it over in his mind enough times she would magically appear next to him.

After showering, Regulus puts on a black shirt and some dark jeans, the first two buttons of the shirt open and his messy hair staying in its untameable form on his head — no matter how hard he tried to comb it into something formal. He knows they're going to the Malfoy Manor today for 'important business' that Regulus is yet to be informed about. Spraying his cologne he notices Maria's cardigan she'd accidentally put in his bag on their way home from Europe and Regulus had noticed its strong smell of perfume. His lips twitch slightly before there's a loud bang on his door and he quickly throws a hoodie over the cardigan, sliding his rings on just as his mother storms in.

"Could you have taken any longer?" Walburga asks snappily and Regulus stays quiet. Living in the house for the seventeen years of his life, he learned to always keep silent, because when you're quiet, nothing can be held against you. Of course, he speaks up sometimes, like when Bellatrix is slandering his brother or especially when a certain Maria Potter is brought into the conversation. "Come, it's nearly eleven o'clock!" She then slams the door behind her and Regulus lets out a breath of relief, opening his door agains and strolling down the creaking staircase and towards the kitchen.

Slowly pushing the heavy door, he's greeted by Kreacher who's moving his hands and as he does, pots and pans float around the kitchen.

"Master Regulus." Kreacher greets in his usual croaky and tired voice.

"Morning Kreacher." Regulus yawns slightly, pouring himself some tea and sitting on one of the countertops and Kreacher brings him a bowl of cereal making him smile thankfully at the house elf who bows low and continues to clean up from that mornings breakfast.

Walking into the dining room where some of his family are gathered, he sees Bellatrix smirk deviously at him.

"Big day today, cousin." Bellatrix sniggers and Rodlphus and Rabastan smirk at each other when Regulus sits down. He looks around and realised that his mother and father are eating silently whilst Bellatrix and the others blabber on about the war. Regulus slowly catches on and feels himself want to suddenly throw up, today is the day he'll get the tattoo like mark on his forearm. Swallowing down the guilt and anxiety, he nervously twirls Maria's ring around his finger, thinking of her. Despite his efforts to distract himself, it didn't last long as Walburga announces that they're leaving for the Malfoys and Regulus lets out a shaky breath before apparating at the same time as the others.

Quickly getting over his dizziness, they start to stroll down the long driveway towards the gloomy Manor. It's a dark manor with a sort of thin fog constantly surrounding it, with tall iron gates and large, arched doors. Bellatrix knocks on the door in some sort of special pattern with her wand and it opens, the group walking inside and Regulus gulping at the sudden uneasiness inside him.

Walking into a sort of dining room, Regulus stops for a second when he sees more than a few dozens of witches and wizards all surrounding the long table, with a man with dark hair and a scar under his left eye at the top of the table, wearing all black robes as well as everyone else. Regulus had quickly shrugged on his robe before they left, because being seen in jeans which a lot of pure blood wizards find 'too muggle' would not be good for a first impression with people who would easily kill you without a second thought.

"Ah, we're glad you could join us today." The man with the dark hair that Regulus presumes is Lord Voldemort says, gesturing to the few empty chairs and Regulus notices Bellatrix give him an admirable look before sitting in a her place. He recognises a few faces, Avery, Mulciber and Rosier all there, along with their parents, the Malfoys, and Serverus Snape. Regulus glares slightly at Snape, remembering the things Maria had told him about the greats haired teen.

"This must be. . .young Regulus." Regulus perks up at the mention of his name and looks at the dark wizard, nodding curtly as he sits.

"Welcome, my friends." Voldemort says, gesturing around them. "Here today, we're discussing another attack, this time on a muggle family called the Monroes who have a witch daughter." Regulus' jaw tightens, knowing that Maria's best friend is that exact muggle-born daughter. "And also, for young Regulus and Rebecca to get their marks." He gestures to Regulus and to the blonde who's across from him who smiles proudly.

"I will kill them, my Lord." Bellatrix pipes and Voldemort nods, Bellatrix leaning back in her chair with a triumphant smirk plastered on her wicked face. Regulus' eyes find his parents who are stood with Cygnus and Druella, watching him carefully.

"Now, I say we shall get the ceremony started." Voldemort says, slowly taking out his wands. "The two of you, come forward." Rebecca eagerly stands and Regulus hesitantly pushes out his chair and walks over, feeling his parents gaze on him as he momentarily looks to Narcissa who is looking rather worried. "Now, ladies first. Hold out your left arm."

Rebecca pulls back her sleeve and Voldemort presses his wand to her forearm and Rebecca's face contorts painfully and tears well in her eyes before the mark begins to appear and she screams loudly, dropping to the ground, dead faint. Voldemort looks to Regulus who slowly rolls up his sleeve and feels Voldemort's wand press into his pale skin.

The pain is small at first, before it grows larger, like someone's holding a red hot iron bar on his skin and he pulls back once Voldemort retracts his wand, Regulus stumbling slightly. A banging headache comes over Regulus before he sees black spots in his vision, looking down and getting a glimpse of the mark before he feels his heavy eyes close.









[][][]








Frowning as he goes to sit upright, Regulus is pushed back onto the soft surface by delicate hands and he squints, seeing the familiar blonde hair of his cousin — Narcissa — who's staring at him in anxiety as she watches him become conscious again. He slowly sits up against a head board and sees he's in what looks to be a spare bedroom of the Malfoy Manor.

"How are you feeling?" Narcissa says quietly and Regulus rubs his temple slowly, remembering what happened and quickly ripping up his sleeve, his grey eyes widening at the dark ink like mark permanently on his skin. He feels it burn as he thinks of Maria, like a warning.

"Fine." Regulus lies and Narcissa sighs, looking at him softly.

"They want to speak with you." Narcissa whispers, rubbing his arm gently. "Told me to tell you when you wake up again."

Regulus nods, getting up and walking through the house with Narcissa following behind him, rubbing her arm anxiously as Lucius pulls her over to where they sit and Voldemort joins them once more.

"So, I think now is the perfect time to arrange the marriage between Rebecca and Regulus?" Voldemort suggests and Regulus' eyes widen whilst Rebecca nods eagerly. "We could have them married by August."

"I—my Lord." Regulus corrects, trying to act convincing. "If I may, I would love to get married after my seventh year at Hogwarts."

"Hm, valid point." Voldemort hums, looking to Walburga and Orion who nod quickly under his intimidating gaze. "Very well then, the first week of July, 1979."

Regulus swallows thickly and looks to his parents, he knows they'll be no help, most likely push him to go worse but it's every child's instinct to look to their parents when in a difficult situation. They give him a warning look and he nods at Voldemort.

As soon as he arrives home, Regulus locks his door with a silencing spell too and throws a glass at the wall, making it shatter as tears well in his storm filled eyes. He sucks on his bottom lip as he paces up and down his bedroom, running hands through his hair and tugging it roughly.

"What's the matter, Regulus?" Maria's soft voice says and his breathing quickens as he slides down the wall, looking at Maria who crouches next to him. He knows she's not there, that's too good to be true, but just seeing her soft chocolate eyes brings him the greatest joy and sadness.

"You're not here." Regulus mumbles to himself, pulling at his hair as he leans his head forwards, resting his elbows on his knees.

"Of course I'm not." Maria whispers, sitting next to him. "Tell me, how does it feel? To know you're the most dangerous person in the world for me?"

"I'm sorry." Regulus breathes out heavily, his eyes bloodshot and his knuckles white. "I'm so sorry. . .I should never have—" Regulus stops, sucking in a shaking breath that's more like a sob. "I should never have let myself—let myself. . ."

"Say it."

"N—"

"Say it, Regulus."

"I shouldn't have let myself love you, all right!" Regulus says loudly, leaning his head back roughly and hitting the back of it against the wall.

"I'm so sorry."








[][][]

...sorry?

I'm sorry for this! But, just know there's lots of drama on the way, and more smut if you're lucky....

anyways, thank you so much for reading!

~Grace xx

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