W I L L O W
Maybe it really wasn't a good idea to move to Colorado after all, just like I thought from the beginning. But then I started to look forward to something or should I say someone...
I looked into the mirror and tried to erase the dark circles under my eyes that I've recently gotten and my eyes were swollen and irritated due to the lack of light and sleep. It's my first day at school after two and a half weeks and let's just say my mom forced me out of bed this morning.
I haven't said a word to anyone about what had happened or why I wasn't at school but I'm guessing Sargent probably told them everything and laughed about his genius plan. Asshole. Jerk.
I looked at my face for the last time and tried to smile. Show a bit of teeth, yes, right there, do the eye thing so it looks genuine, there you go Willow. Keep that face through the whole day and you will show everyone including him that, you're over it already. Yes, so over it, I've been crying about it since...Willow! Shut up.
"Good morning honey! Do you want me to drive you to school?"
My mom knows about it. Well a part of it. I told her that I got played and nothing else. There's way too much to it but I'm -embarrassed- about how friable I've gotten and how stupid and easy I was.
And I'm even more upset about the fact that, if someone told me right now that he was in danger, I would be the first one to be by his side because I've grown so painfully attached to him it's worrying me.
"No, It's okay mom, I'm going to walk to school" I said and my mom turned around and looked out of the window.
"But, It's raining?"
"It's okay, I need a bit of rain to wake up" I said with a smile and she smiled back at me with a sad look.
"Aren't you going to eat anything?"
"No, I'll buy something at school. I have to go now or I'll be late" I lied and hugged her goodbye.
Another lie. Another lie. Another lie.
I got outside and the rain wasn't as much as before and I appreciated it. I put my headphones on and started walking while drowning in my thoughts. I need a distraction, I really do, maybe I should start writing again? I heard about this platform called Wattpad, where you can literally publish stories, poems and stuff without paying. I should try it, maybe it'll be good for me when I feel like shit.
"The mirror's image, it tells me it's home time. But I'm not finished, 'cause you're not by my side. And as I arrived I thought I saw you leavin', carryin' your shoes"
Skip.
"Secrets I have held in my heart, Are harder to hide than I thought,Maybe I just wanna be yours,I wanna be yours"
Ugh! Skip again. These songs don't usually make me depressed but when you're hurt you understand the lyrics better and it hits you a different way than usual. But don't we all listen to it because we relate to it...In some way.
"Under a spell you're hypnotized , Darlin', how could you be so blind?"
Perfect.
I was at school an hour earlier, yes I lied to my mom. I wanted to be earlier at school so I didn't have to see him and explain myself to the others. I feel so bad for ignoring everyone but I know they'll understand me.
The school building was empty and the only person I saw was the janitor when I got in so I thought we were the only ones. I was very wrong.
I took a few turns before I was in front of my locker. I put some books in and closed it.
"Willow?" No please. No.
I turned around and looked right into those sky blue eyes and my heart literally started jumping in its place. It'll jump out of my chest, if it doesn't calm down.
I ignored him and walked away.
He took a hold of my arm and caught me off guard so we ended up really close to each other.
Wow, he's so close to me.
"Let go of me or I swear I'll fucking scream" I muttered and he softly let go and tried taking a hold of my hand.
"Don't touch me"
"How do you feel?"
I started laughing, "I'm perfectly fine. I couldn't have been better. I guess god has different plans for me so he made me realize what a fucking piece of shit you were and now I'm happier than ever that I've gotten rid of a walking bomb like you" I said and hit his biggest insecurity.
"What did you say?" he said with an angry look and I smiled.
"I said you're a fucking walking bomb and I'm happy that you fucking played me"
"Say it again"
"YOU'RE A FUCKIN-" Before I could end my sentence his lips were on me, pushing me harder onto the lockers.
I pushed him off of me when I realized what was happening and I couldn't stop my tears, "What do you think you're doing?! Do you actually think that you can fix what you've done? It's over Sargent, I will never ever trust you so please your sick game will not work on me again. There's no Sargent for me anymore, you're just a face in the crowd, you're a stranger to me" No, no, no, I can't show weakness!
I started walking away and ignored his hard look.
"I regret it! I'm sorry! Please just give me one more chance." I heard him yell but I ignored it, there's no more chances for you to kill me even more.
***
"Why aren't you and Sargent talking? Did something happen?" Ruby asked and I let out a sigh.
Sargent hadn't said a word to anyone about what had happened between us and I was annoyed but relieved in a way. Annoyed because I would have to lie but relieved because I don't want him to make me look dumb.
We, as in me,Cody, Gray and Ruby were sitting at the cafeteria and having lunch as they were all showering me with questions.
"We thought it was a good idea to end it. We were toxic...to each other and since we care about each other so much we ended it before one of us got really hurt" I lied and they nodded their heads.
"Why did you literally avoid us for weeks?" Gray asked and my heart stopped, oops, totally forgot about that.
"Oh! I was so sick! And being sick and you know just getting out of a relationship is not a good mix so I stayed at home and tried spending more "me" time so I could focus on getting better" I lied again and Cody laughed.
"Well you could've at least told us, we were worried and Sargent didn't say a word about this either" Well of course that cute fuck would put it all on me.
Wait? Cute? Ugh!
"Well! Since you're a single pringle with way too little mingle the party Cody is having in a few days will be A VERY good start for your single career" Ruby said and I chuckled.
"What party? What are we celebrating?"
"It's just a pre birthday party since my birthday is in a few weeks but it's exam week on my birthday and I thought we could celebrate and have fun now and stress later" Cody explained and I nodded in agreement.
"So are you coming?" Ruby and Gray asked in unison and laughed.
Should I go? Maybe it'll be good for me and a change. I have to make some changes.
"Yeah, of course, it'll be fun!" I said and my eyes got stuck on Sargent who was sitting alone in a corner watching me.
His eyes pierced right through my soul and I was once again drowning in them.
You ruined us Sargent, we could've been so much better and we could've healed each other but you chose to hurt me when I was trying to heal you.
But I still can't stop it-
...the sparkles that stayed on my lips after your kiss. The warmth you left on my wrist. The feeling that you give me that never leaves my body. How can my heart and mind forget you when my body still responds to you like you've never left?
I break my own heart writing this loool I just want them to be happyyyyy.
Hope you've had an amazing day cause I did, with looovely people hihi :)
Lots of love and appreciation for the support and love you show this story <3
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//D.E