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Dalawang araw na ang nakalipas noong ipinaalam ko kila Mommy ang kondisyon ko, ngayon na ang araw kung kailan ako magsisimula sa chemotherapy.
Ngayon ay naghahanda na kami, dahil ako ay sasalang na sa chemotherapy, Sa tingin ko ay aabutin pa ako ng isang buwan o mahigit pa rito sa ospital, but it's fine, I need to recover with this.
There are three phases of chemotherapy, the first phase is induction chemotheraphy, the second phase is consolidation, the third phase is maintenance chemotherapy.
This one will be a long journey, but I need to strengthen my feelings. Kailangan ko munang isantabi ang mga bagay na hindi ko muna dapat alalahanin. Kasi kailangan kong isipin muna ang sarili ko.
Dahil magandang ospital ang Villareal, hindi ko na kailangan pang magpunta sa malayong lugar para magpagamot. Because Villareal Medical Hospital is the most high technology when it comes to hospitals machines.
Hindi ko na mabanggit kung ano na ba ang nangyayari, dahil wala naman akong alam tungkol dito, I just want to recover. That's the only thing on my mind.
"Miss Hydra, we're going to start now, Please calm yourself." sabi ng doctor.
I nodded, I can see that they are starting with the first phase, I know now, that undergoing chemotheraphy isn't easy.
I suddenly felt bad for the children and to others who's experiencing this stage too. I just hope all of us will be strong and fight this challenge.
The doctor placed my arms on a machine that I don't know what it is called, and there's light that's makes my arms hurt.
"This machine contains laser, and the laser will kill all the leukemia cells. We'll do this for four weeks, Miss Hydra." sabi ni Khael, na siyang doctor.
It hurts, di ata gaanong tumatalab pa ang ilang itinurok nilang anesthesia. Pero ayos lang naman, kaya ko pa. But nakakapanghina. I feel so weak these past few days, pero parang mas lumala pa ata ngayon.
Pinagmamasdan ko lang pabalik balik na laser na dumadaan sa braso ko.
"As I said, we will do this procedure for weeks, but I also want to inform you that you might experience fatigue, loss of appetite, nausea, constipation or diarrhoea, hair loss, mouth sores, and also skin and nail problems. But we will treat it as soon as you feel those." sabi ni Khael.
I tightly closed my eyes, Akala ko itong lasers lang ang makakasakit sa akin sa stage na ito, I really need to ready myself, my whole body.
"And I advice that you should eat more fruits, atleast ten serves each day, and same with vegetables. Because you need to strengthen your body. And nutritious foods can help to fight leukemia cells." sabi niya pang muli. I nodded. I sighed because of weakness. I feel like dying already but I still need to stand up and experience hundreds of runways.
"I can do this Doc Khael, I have a lot of runways to attend after this." I smiled.
"That's a good motivation. Ipagpatuloy mo lang iyan, Miss Hydra." sabi ni Doc Khael sa akin.
It tooks hours, each day. Sa buong apat na linggo, naging ganoon ang proseso, laser dito, laser doon. Unti-unti na rin naglalagas ang kinaiingatan kong buhok. It's okay, because it's part of the process.
Every time, I puked, hinang-hina ako kakasuka, kahit wala akong gana na kumain, My parents always pushed me too. Kahit pa nga hindi ako nagkakaroon ng menstruation, palagi rin masakit ang puson ko, sumasakit din ang bibig ko, lalo na ang balat na pinakaiingatan ko rin, puno na ito ng rashes.
But it's definitely fine with me, Doc Khael informed me about this, pero hindi ko maitatago na sobrang hirap. Sobrang nakakapagod. But this is the process.
"Mama! Patulong po!" sigaw ni Maxine upang tawagin si Mommy, Sumusuka ako nang sobrang dami, dahil sobra ang kinain ko, o kahit man kaunti. Araw-araw akong sumusuka. Hindi na ko makatayo ng maayos. I just sit and puked all over.
It's gross, I know, I should clean myself but my body is just so weak. On the first days, I can still manage to clean my mess, pero pahina ng pahina ang katawan ko.
"Hydra, my baby. It's okay." sabi ni Mommy at nililinis ang aking katawan.
I'm still staying at a private room. Together with my Mom and Maxine.
They picked another pair of shirt and pajamas and made me wear it. I lost count on how many clothes I used for a day because of my vomiting.
My Daddy and Kuya Vega, just stay outside, Because I said so, I don't want them to see my situation, They are the ones who's supplying and purchases some stuffs for me.
"M-Mom. My r-rashes..." nauutal na banggit ko. My rashes hurts so bad. Buong braso at binti ko ay mayroon nito. My mouth dries. Kahit na palagi akong umiinom ng tubig, gatas at kung ano-anong fruit shakes.
The doctor said that we can use some ointments for my rashes to ease the pain. It helps a little, Hindi naman kasi ito tuluyang gumagaling, because I'm still undergoing my chemotherapy.
I felt how gentle and soft my Mom's hands is when she's applying the ointment.
My head hurts like hell. I can't even look around properly because of dizziness.
I just close my eyes, and thinking that this will end soon. I'm imagining myself walking to a runway again, and I forgot all of my worries.
That's my everyday routine. Unti-unti na rin akong nasasanay kahit sobrang hirap. Kaya hindi ko rin maiwasan na bumilib sa mga batang mayroong leukemia katulad ko, they are so strong. I'm proud of them.
And as of the days passes by, I outdo the induction process. I'm proud of myself because I finally did it.
Pero mas mahirap pa pala ang sumunod na nangyari. I was on the consolidation phase.
They checked my bone marrow if there is an active leukemia cells, they did the process again, because there are leukemia cells on my bone marrow. They did all they can do to eliminate all the leukemia cells left on my body and for it not to spread through my brain.
Para akong pinaparusahan, parang tinotorture kumbaga. Nakalbo na rin ako dahil tuluyan ng nawala ang lahat ng aking buhok. My skin is dried, it looks like a land who experience El Nino. My lips that is reddish before, it is now pale and dry. I looked aged.
My Mom and Maxine never leave my side, literally, They are the ones who's with me on my private room. Kung sobra ang pagsusuka ko when I was on the induction phase, my vomiting became worst and worst.
They never get tired on changing my clothes everytime I puked everywhere. They never get tired to push me to eat a lot of healthy foods kahit parang masusuka ako. They never failed to convince me that I can get through this stage. I can also see their tiredness and stress but they never let me feel that I'm a burden. They just treat me like a baby.
Sila ang nagpapaligo sa akin, sila rin ang nagpapakain. Lahat ng mga bagay na ginagawa ko noon mag-isa ay sila na ang gumagawa para sa akin.
Nakahiga lang ako ng ilang araw sa isang photon beam. Araw-araw yun ganoon ang nangyayari, tuloy tuloy pa rin ang aking pasusuka, at pag dami ng mga rashes ko. Para na nga akong baldado. Hindi na ko makagalaw ng maayos.
Even on the last phase which is the maintenance, sila pa rin ang nakagabay sa akin. But the maintenance phase is not hurtful like the other phases. It has less dose.
Kapag nakakadilat ako, kitang-kita ko yung pag-aalala sa mga mata nila Mommy. I felt sad, of course. But I still managed to wear my smiles. Kasi alam kong makakabawas ito sa pag-aalala nila para sa akin.
Everytime na sumasalang ako sa consolidation phase, I always wear my smiles, It's my own way to say that I can do it.
And after three years, I outdo the leukemia. I'm now a leukemia free, a survivor.
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NO PLAGIARISM. PLAGIARISM IS A CRIME.
(I worked hard for this. So you better work on your own story.)
@_Sodaaaaa | 2021