💋 THE LIST 💋
- Lip ring...
- Harvey
I wake up on Saturday morning, still feeling a little guilty. I stare at the ceiling and try to remember what Maia told me - I don't have to be nice to everyone. She is right, I would have had to break it off eventually, and it's probably better that it happened sooner rather than later.
He probably won't want to be friends anymore, though. As I brush my teeth, I wonder how Maia manages to stay friends with guys when she rejects them. I shrug off the thought and wash my face.
I grab a bowl of cereal and sit down at my desk, with the express intention of finishing an essay for my history class, which is due right before Thanksgiving break. But between the sounds of my siblings playing and my parents doing their weekend cleaning, my house is way too loud to get any schoolwork done. I decide to make the library my workspace instead.
I gather my things and pad down to the kitchen to ask my dad for a ride, and he agrees. When we arrive, he tells me to call him when I want a ride back and reminds me to study hard.
The library is surprisingly packed for a Saturday, but I still manage to find a seat among the work tables and put my headphones on. I'm about halfway through my essay when someone sits in front of me with a huff. I ignore them, turning up the volume on my study playlist to avoid getting distracted.
Suddenly, the person taps the top of my laptop impatiently. I look up and find myself face to face with Nathan, his black sunglasses resting at the top of his tousled blonde hair.
"Hi..." I say warily as I pull off my headphones.
"You are a ruthless little thing," he grins at me.
I furrow my brow in confusion. "Excuse me?"
"Oh sure, keep up the innocent act. You're a heartbreaker in the making," he says, leaning further across the table.
I inhale sharply. If I lean forward a bit, we would be only inches apart. Somewhere in my subconscious, a voice eggs me on, telling me to do it. I choose to indulge her and lean across the table myself.
This shocks him, I remark quietly. His eyebrows raise, and I could swear he looked down at my lips for a second.
"Care to tell me what you're talking about?" I ask, feigning confidence. My heart is definitely beating faster, and I really hope I'm not blushing.
"I'm talking about you crushing poor Yorkie's dreams over the phone last night, you heartless minx," he smirks. My jaw drops in surprise, and he leans back in his chair, not breaking eye contact.
"Oh my god..." I murmur, "you're joking, right? I didn't really hurt his feelings that much, did I?"
He chuckles and rubs his jaw, unintentionally bringing my attention to how chiselled it is. "I'm joking, you can relax," he says, shaking his head at me. "Well, I'm half-joking. He was pretty upset about it, but that's his own fault."
I open my mouth to object, but he continues. "No, it was pretty stupid of him to ask you that over the phone, and after knowing you for, what, 3 days?" He smirks again. "You know, most people call him Yorkie because of his last name, but I do it because he's like a little puppy... a lost little puppy."
I chuckle softly, shaking my head at him. "And you call me ruthless..." I remark coolly.
He leans over the table again. "Relax, Rachel, I'm only joking. It's good that you did that, even if it was over the phone. I probably would have judged you if you'd said yes."
"So good to know," I say sarcastically. He laughs, and I notice that his eyes are actually green, not brown like I'd originally thought. I turn my head slightly, examining his face. He's kind of gorgeous, actually, and he clearly knows it, or he wouldn't act the way he does.
He taps the top of my laptop screen again. "What are you working on?"
I come back to reality, mentally kicking myself. It was probably so obvious that I was checking him out. "History essay," I say quickly, forcing myself to look away from him and down at my word document.
"Hm. Sounds boring. Let's hang out instead." He runs a finger across the top of my screen. When I look back up at his face, I find that he's still staring at me, green eyes boring into mine. He raises an eyebrow at me, challenging me. Do it, my subconscious urges me, what if it leads somewhere interesting... like making out between the shelves...
I bite my lip. "And do what?"
His eyes drag down to my lips. "Not that," he jokes with a grin.
I'm slightly offended, but I have to admit that I'm enjoying the back and forth, so I play into it. "Well," I huff sarcastically, "then I'd rather work on my history essay."
"Naughty girl." He shakes his head, smiling. "Tell me about yourself, Rachel."
I lean back in my chair. "That might be a lot to get through... what do you want to know?"
"Hmm... is Yorkie the first poor soul you've destroyed?"
I run my hand through my hair and meet his gaze. "Yes, but let's not call it that. I feel like a bitch."
"I doubt that," he remarks. "And don't, I already told you that it was stupid. No one thinks you're a bitch."
"So there were people there?? When he called?" I try to keep the embarrassment out of my voice but fail miserably. I'm also way too loud, eliciting an annoyed shhh out of the woman working at the desk next to mine.
"Yeah, Rachel, shhh." Nathan wags a finger at me teasingly. "And yeah, we were hanging out, he said he wanted to ask you to be his girlfriend," he rolls his eyes as he says the word, "and we told him to do it right then, over the phone so we could hear the answer."
I gasp. "That's horrible! You guys are so mean."
He laughs. "Please, he could have said no. He gives in too easily. Plus, any idiot could see that you were barely interested."
I can't help but smile, despite feeling even worse for poor Yorkie than I already did.
"I did think I was making it pretty obvious," I mutter.
"Do tell..." he presses me, leaning closer.
"I can't tell you, I feel bad enough already, and you would make fun of him for it," I groan.
"I won't, I won't, I promise." He holds out his hand, pinky finger lifted.
I smirk. I feel oddly comfortable with him, even though I'm definitely attracted to him. I lean in close and link my pinky with his.
"Cross your heart and hope to die? Only two other people in the whole world know, and they've been sworn to secrecy," I whisper, "so if it gets out, I'll know it was you."
"Sure, cross my heart, hope to die, take it to the grave, you can punch me in the face and break my nose if I tell anyone," he whispers back. Our faces are so close that I can feel his breath on my face. He squeezes our pinky fingers together, and it sends a chill up my arm and through my whole body, which I try to ignore, keeping my eyes on his.
"Okay," I begin, keeping my voice low, "he told me that kissing was like eating a taco, in that you turn your face 90 degrees and open wide."
He laughs loudly and heartily, throwing his head back. The woman at the table next to ours shoots him a death glare, and he holds up his hand in apology. He buries his face in his arm, shaking with silent laughter. I can't help but giggle as well. It is pretty funny.
When he looks up, he has tears in his eyes, and he's smiling from ear to ear. "Why wouldn't he just turn the taco instead?" His voice breaks slightly as he tries to hold in his laughter. Now it's my turn to laugh. I cover my mouth with my hand to muffle the sound.
When he finally calms down, he lets out a deep exhale and rests his head on his hand.
"You won't tell anyone, right?" I bite my lip, suddenly regretting telling him.
"Fuck that, are you kidding? I want to make it my social media bio and text everyone I know!"
My mouth falls open. "NATHAN," I seethe, but he stops me before I can continue.
"I'm joooking, you swore me to secrecy, remember?" He replies with a wave of his hand. "As much as I want to shout it from the rooftops, I will be taking it to my grave... until you tell me otherwise."
I roll my eyes at him.
"So what happened next? What did you do?" He leans in eagerly.
I shrug. "I told him that I didn't think that was true, he said that it had to be that way or else our noses would bump into each other. He seemed... really sure of himself. If I remember correctly, his exact words were "I've done this before," sooo..." I trail off.
Nathan raises an eyebrow. "But so have you, right?"
I scrunch my nose at him and rest the side of my forehead on my fist.
"Oh... oh no," he shakes his head sadly. "That just won't do at all."
I scoff and turn away.
"I'm not being sarcastic," he laughs, "I am genuinely sorry that that was your first kiss." I turn to face him again. "You deserve better than that..." his eyes drag down to my lips.
I feel myself flush but disguise it with another scoff. "Okay, I have actual work to get done, Nathan. I'm sure you do too, unless you just come to the library to annoy girls," I tease.
He kisses his teeth at me with another devilish grin. I smile and turn my attention back to my laptop but find myself glancing at him every few minutes as he flips through a textbook and scribbles in his notebook. I pretend not to notice when he does the same to me.
We work in silence for over an hour, occasionally meeting eyes when we sneak a glance at the same time and smile. I finish my essay and close my laptop. He lifts his head from his notebook.
"Done?" He asks. I nod. "Good girl," he murmurs, looking down at his notes again. I feel a flutter in my stomach when he says that, but ignore it.
I look at my phone and bite my lip. My dad said to call when I was done, but I don't want to leave just yet. I pull out my English notebook and open it to a fresh page. I write down some ideas for the upcoming final essay and then drum my pencil against the paper.
"What are you working on?" I ask in a low voice.
He looks up at me and lifts the flap of his textbook, so I can see. "Biology," he replies, "big test coming up this week."
I furrow my brow. "Biology? You're a year older than I am, then."
He smiles at me. "Mhm. Look at you, making older friends."
I tilt my head. "So we're friends now?"
"Oh yeah," he says, reaching over to grab my notebook from in front of me.
"Hey!" I exclaim, grasping for it. My heartbeat quickens, although there's no way he could know that my list is on the back flap of the book.
He shoots a confused look at me and then grabs my pencil and scribbles something down on the page with my essay topic ideas.
"Here," he says, holding out my notebook. I take it and look at him quizzically. "It's my phone number," he winks, gathering his books.
"My phone is literally right here," I say, holding it up.
"Good, so you can text me right now. Oh, and you should go with the second essay topic, it'll be more interesting. I circled it for you." He stands and slings his backpack over one shoulder. "My ride is here, but this was fun. Same time next week?"
I look up at him, standing over me expectantly. His eyes look brown again. I let out a shaky breath and shrug. "Sure."
He grins and taps the table with his fist. "See you then."
I watch him walk away and then look down at my notebook. In big, slanted letters, he's scrawled NATE, with a phone number directly underneath. He really did circle an essay topic, too.
What is the significance of intimacy and sexuality in the book?
I roll my eyes. Of course he would pick that one. I pick up my phone and call my dad.