𝐮𝐧𝐟𝐚𝐢𝐫 ❞
﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋
.⃗. 💌 •̩̩͙⁺ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐈𝐕𝐄 ⤾·˚ ༘ ◡̈
A FEW DATS LATER, THRONGS of starved refugees were put to plough in the wastelands as a last-ditch effort to raise food. But the cold, hard ground yielding nothing. And the following year, 846, the remaining refugees old enough to serve in the military were tasked with reclaiming Wall Maria.
Of the 250000 sent, nearly twenty percent of the surviving population, not even two hundred made it back. While it did nothing to drive back the Titans, their sacrifice did at least lessen the effects of famine within the Interior.
And only then, the L/N girl realized to the full extent how unreliable, unprepared and useless the government truly was. It was sickening for her, they really didn't care what happened to the people -as if they weren't their own.
Since a young age, Y/Ns caretakers made sure she knew how their world basically worked. She was a bright child and there was no use in hiding the truth. The truth, that the government –or the King and his advisors in particularly– didn't care about any of them. She couldn't trust, much less depend, on them.
She could only stand there and watch how Armin bid his grandfather goodbye, for most probably the last time. And even now, she could also only stand there, with hands balled in frustration and her head casted downwards as tears streamed down Armins face.
She wanted to help him, to pacify him and give him the world -because she was certain he deserved it all. He deserved everything good in the world -he deserved heaven and earth.
Because he was her angel.
He was there, when no one else was. He was that light at the end of the tunnel that she couldn't reach -and because of that, he reached out for her. When she was too weak to come forward -to him- he came towards her and took her into his arms.
He never expected anything from her, he didn't ask her to talk or explain anything. And he didn't ask, when she grabbed tightly onto his shirt when he was about to stand up, or when she suddenly sobbed her heart out at his chest -or when she came out of nowhere and nuzzled into his arm.
He never asked, he was simply there.
And despite the fact that he gave her everything she could ask for in this kind of situation -it was also frustrating. While he comforted her, he never felt the need to at least show how much all this took a toll on him -aside from his rarely visible anxiety.
She wanted to give him something back.
Dear God -she wanted to give him everything he could dream of! Just for him to stop crying -or even crack a small smile. But she couldn't. Why?
Because you're helpless. A voice in her head told her. Y/N frowned. But why?
Because you don't care enough.
You never do.
Her frown deepend.
》♡《
"We have to find a way to stop them." Eren stated, snapping Y/N out of her thoughts. She would later think about what the voice? had told to her. Now was not time right time, she had to be there for Armin.
Even if that meant getting snarky comments or icy glares from Eren and getting ignored by Mikasa. It was about Armin, and not about them and their very strong dislike against her.
"Our lives will never be our own until we do -this world will never feel like home. " He carried on, as Y/N kneeled down to Armin and squeezed his arm in support. Her other hand cradling his cheek gently, the same way he did to her nights before.
"That's it. Next year I'll be applying to join the cadets." He told them, crouching down beside Armin against the Wall. He looked so determined -it made Y/N awestruck. Eren Yeager never failed to impress Y/N.
He could be all mean and grumpy towards her, but she would always admire him. Y/N recognized that this wasn't something, well, very good. But it wasn't like she could do something against it -Eren was at this point a role model for her.
Not that she would admit that to anyone that wasn't Armin.
Said boy gasped at Erens statement, while Mikasa just sighed. "To become strong enough to fight back." He said, not wavering a second with his choice. Another thing Y/N admired about him so much -he knew what he wanted and never seemed to make a bad decision.
Unlike her. She was always regretting.
"I'm with you." Armin stated, tears no longer streaming down his face, but rather lingering in his eyes. Y/Ns head snapped to him and instantly her awestruck look was replaced with one of horror. No, no, no, Armin couldn't do that to her-
"You don't have to!" Eren quickly exclaimed, equally as shocked as Y/N with Armins words. "I do!" The Arlert boy retorted loudly.
"So do I." Mikasa, who was silent until now, said. "Damn it! I'm not trying to drag you! Look, there's no point in following me to my death!" Eren explained to them, hoping both would change their minds.
He couldn't let them throw away every chance of a normal life, just because he choose this path for himself. As hypocritical as it sounded, he wanted them safe inside the Walls -at least until they could finally be truly free.
"Yeah. And if I can help it, then it won't be your death." Mikasa replied calmly. Eren frowned slightly, but then stood up with a small nod. In that moment Y/N choose to stay silent, it was for the best.
She wouldn't want to ruin the somewhat calm atmosphere with something she said. She wouldn't dare, after Armin had finally calmed down. She knew she was not welcome and nothing short of an outsider in their group.
And despite the pang in her chest, she choose to accept the fact and closed her eyes. Maybe then the calm feeling of sadness would wash away with the wind. She would stay with Armin until he would have enough of her and would go his own way.
He would leave someday.
Just like everyone eventually did.
》♡《
Eren glanced at Y/N, and Mikasa ‐too- had taken a quick glance into the L/Ns direction. She didn't notice, too lost in her thought. But Armin did.
"Allright. Together then." Eren said. Armin frowned, he knew what his friend meant. And the glance into Y/Ns direction only confirmed Armins suspicion.
Eren didn't want Y/N with them. He would become an soldier with Armin and Mikasa by his side, but not Y/N L/N.
If it wasn't for the fact that Eren simply didn't like Y/N, then Armin would want her to stay within the Interior as well. However, he knew Eren had no good intention and did not want Y/N away from them out of good will. He didn't recognize her as one of them.
But Armin did. And Armin would take Y/N, if she was willing, with him. He couldn't leave her alone, that would be more dangerous. And he concluded she would be safer with him. Not to forget that she would learn how to defeat titans and ultimately how to protect herself.
Eren would not separate the two of them. -so much was clear. And he, Mikasa and Armin would've a long chit-chat to make that clear for everyone. This was long overdue.
》♡《
"Y/N?" Armin called out softly after a long silence between the four children. He took her hand into his and caressed it with his thumb. Y/N hummed in response, her eyes slowly straying to him but still not fully focused. She was even now lost in thoughts. "Would you give us a moment?"
He sent her a gentle smile and his voice was sweet, he had chosen his words carefully. He didn't want to hurt her any further, she already felt like an outcast. He didn't need to fuel that feeling as well.
Y/N nodded absent-minded and slowly stood up. She walked away from the alley and probably to the crowds of people in search for an distraction.
"Eren, Mikasa." Armin stood up, the hat of his grandfather in his hand as he dusted the dirt off of his clothes. "Why can't you accept Y/N?" He asked, his eyes boring coldly right into the grey ones of Mikasa before he diverted his attention to Eren, who now stood up as well.
"What do you mean?" Eren scoffed, avoiding Armins gaze. Armin huffed rudely, "You know what I mean."
"You glare at her as if she was an insect, you bump purposely into her and you make rude comments about how she shouldn't be here. Not to forget that you always seem to either ignore her, or make fun of her." Armin listed his wrong doings, his tone getting angrier with each word.
"Armin-"
He glared at her. "You don't even get me started, Mikasa. You ignore her very existence and are just as bad as Eren. There is no justification for that. She never did any of you two wrong, and yet you choose to toy around like that with her." He scoffed, crossing his arms angrily.
It followed silence after Armins words. They both knew he was right -and they had no explanation to offer. Mikasa fixed her scarf uncomfortably as Eren stubbornly glared at the ground with his hands in his pockets.
Armin sighed, his eyebrows furrowed in frustration. He –just like his friends– didn't like this situation at all. But this issue needed to be addressed -he avoided it for long enough.
"Look, I don't expect you to coddle her and smoother her in love, but you could at least do the bare minimum and give her the respect she deserves. Do you really think she can just brush that off?" He asked. His friends stayed silent.
"If you can't do that, then I won't let this go on like before. We can't go on like that. It's either you change your behavior -or Y/N and I will distance ourselves from you." Armin told them. Eren and Mikasa looked at Armin in shock. What-?
"Armin you can't-" Eren began, but the blonde cut him off. "No, Eren. There's nothing to discuss -this is it. This can't carry on, I won't allow this to carry on." He was truly determined and there was no way in hell he would back down from this.
"It's your choice." He said, turning around and slowly walking away from them.
"Do you really want to throw all these years of friendship away just because of a silly little girl?" Eren shouted. He was panicking, would Armin really go that far for this girl? Even Mikasa was taken aback by that, would he?
Armin stopped in his track, and for a moment Eren hoped his friend had realized that she wasn't worth it. But then, Armin turned around with a sweet small smile.
"Eren, am I really the right person to ask this?"
He asked. After a long silence, he began to walk away again. Leaving Eren and Mikasa behind. That was answer enough for Eren.
Armin truly loved his friends -and Y/N was one of them.
But the question was, if Eren –and Mikasa too– loved them enough as well?
》♡《
Y/N wandered aimlessly through the streets. If there was one more thing she would've wanted to ask her caretakers -then it certainly wouldn't be the answer to the question about being alive, but rather the answer to
Why do the things have to be like they are?
It could be answered in so many ways, that the question didn't really fit what Y/N really wanted to ask. Why did the things have to be like that? Why do they have to always runaway and hide from the titans? Why are they always the helpless ones -just why?
Why did the government was like that? Why was no one prepared for all this? Why were they the prey? Why did all this happen?
Just- why?
Everything came crashing down on her once again. She wouldn't get her happy ending, how could she? After what happened in Shiganshina 845 -after what still happened just differently.
After the titans ruthlessly killed people and destroyed homes.
Y/N wanted to cry, she wanted to scream, she wanted just everything to stop. Stop, it all. Couldn't the world just- stop working for a second? Just so that she could breathe?
"Please, just a second." She whispered out, gripping onto her head tightly as her messy hair blocked her view. And yet, it couldn't block the tears from streaming down her face and onto the dirty ground.
"Please."
She wanted it back, her life, her home.
Everything.
But the world was just unfair.
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❝ 𝐍𝐄𝐗𝐓 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 ? ❞
Heyyy, guess who's back with a new chapter??? (✧ω✧) Not proofread -but yeah, no, please don't be mean. I'm a little crybaby and I should actually do my homework right now. (￣ω￣) What are your thoughts on doing a round of honor in school and repeating a year? Honestly, at some point in my life I started to romanticize it too much hehe. <(￣︶￣)> I mean I would totally have the main character vibes in the new class -but yeah we gotta see~ This chapter was kinda rushed but I hope you like it~ o( ❛ᴗ❛ )o
( coming soon . . . )