Chapter Twenty
Paris' POV
I stepped out of my bedroom at the same moment Louis stepped out of his. We both stared down at what we were wearing, and simultaneously groaned. We apparently shared the same Superman t-shirt.
"I'm changing," I stated, but suddenly Natalie was hurrying us both towards the door. We had been staying in Charlotte's grandparent's house while we were in Manchester, which was a luxurious mansion on the very edge of town. They were nice people, and had allowed all ten of us to stay with them. Jesus, there was enough space. The only people who had to share a room were Louis and Harry, and then Rae and I. And that was just because we wanted to.
"We're going to miss our plane if you two have to search your bags for something the other doesn't have," Natalie muttered. I rolled my eyes at the same time Louis did.
We walked down the stairs, and were greeted with everybody else. Raw started laughing when she saw us.
"You two look hilarious!" she cried shamelessly, "I totally shop Laris!"
"Shut up," I growled, which just made her laugh harder.
"Guys, we have to go," Charlotte reminded us, and I nodded. We followed Char to the limo, which was a bit excessive, but fun as hell. I live limos; it doesn't matter how many times I ride them, it's the same amount of excitement.
It's about 11pm, so the airport wasn't crazy. We got on the plane without difficulties, and I realized that I didn't have anybody beside me. The others were surrounded with people, but of course, the only two tickets that weren't purchased were the two next to me.
I sighed, putting my head back to try and sleep. An hour later, I was still wide awake, but everyone else was snoring.
I let out a sigh and felt around for my phone, stuffing it in my pocket and getting up to go to the washroom. I stepped into the small room and locked the door behind me. I took out my blackberry, aware that it wasn't safe, but not particularly giving a damn.
Just as I was about to ring my dad, the phone went off in my hand. It was my mum. Again.
With shaky hands, I pressed 'accept' and held the phone up to my ear, "Hello?"
"P-Paris?" my mum's voice questioned in shock.
"I believe that's who you just called," I snapped, "Do you want me to get Rae or something instead?"
"You answered!" she cried in disbelief and joy, "It's so good to hear your voice, sweetheart!"
"Don't call me that," I spat, "You lost the right to call me that when you left us."
"Paris-"
"Don't try to explain yourself! You left us without a word! Without a word of goodbye!"
"Paris, I'm sorry-"
I ignored her, "I was ten years old, so don't tell me I 'just don't understand'. I'm not a little girl anymore, but you wouldn't know that, now would you? How did you even get my number?"
"Paris, I know I hurt you," my mother said desperately, "I know I left you when you needed me most-"
"That's not why I'm mad."
The pause on the other end of the line was one of shock, "What?"
"I'm not mad because you left me," I stated, "I'm mad because you left dad. David and Carter were two young to know you, and James and I always knew you were going to leave. But dad was heartbroken, and you don't even seem to feel bad about it. That's because you weren't the one who was comforting him every night as he cried into his ten year old daughter's lap. You weren't the one who had to listen to him telling you all the things he regretted, and all the things he wanted to tell you, but you never gave him the chance. Why? Because you left. That's why I'm mad."
There was a pause on the other end, before I heard my mother's distant sobs. I didn't care that she was crying - as horrible as that sounds. She caused this mistake on her own, and I wasn't about to stand here and comfort her about something that all but ruined my life.
"I'm so sorry, Paris," she finally said, her voice cracking on almost every word.
"You ruined everything," I stated.
"I know."
"You were selfish."
"I know."
"And a horrible mother."
"I know."
"Then why do I still care?" I whispered.
I could almost hear the smile in my mother's voice, "Because even though I'm a terrible person, I'm still your mother, and you know I love you SO much, Paris. I bought all of your CDs, and watched all of your interviews and performances. I've never been more proud, love."
I had tears in my eyes, "You actually cared?"
"Of course I do. Like I said. I love you so much, sweetie. I'm a proud mum."
I nodded, even though I knew she couldn't see me. All these years, I thought she didn't care. I thought that she had forgotten about us completely. About ME completely. But she was always there.
"I have to go," I told her.
"Okay," she said sadly, "I love you, Paris Stykes."
I hesitated, before letting out a breath I had been holding, "I-I love you too, mum."
I hung up the phone and sighed, stuffing it back in my pocket. I tried to wipe away the tears, but they wouldn't go away. It's okay, though. It's not like anybody is awake to see me anyways.
I unlocked the door and suddenly ran straight into someone. I looked up and took in a sharp breath, staring right into the blue-green eyes of Louis Tomlinson.
"Were you eavesdropping?" I accused, expecting a witty reply.
Instead, I got, "Are you okay?"
My eyebrows furrowed in confusion, "What?"
"Are you okay?" Louis repeated patiently. I stared at him in utter shock.
"Ya, I'll be fine," I said dismissively, walking past him and sitting down in my seat. He followed me and sat down next to me.
"I'm serious, Paris," he stated, "I know we don't always get along, but if you're crying, I'm not going to be a jerk."
I let out a shaky breath, "I-I know. I'm fine...honest. I just...I've pretty much grown up believing my mother hated me, and wanted nothing to do with me, but now..."
Louis nodded in understanding, "I can see how that would be a real eye opener. My dad left when I was little. He got remarried and everything. I remember thinking - believing - that he replaced us, you know? Replaced my mum, replaced me. But we sorted things out, and I understand things better now."
I smiled, "I think that's what my mum wants to do. Sort things out. I haven't spoken to her in eight years. I never believed she replaced us exactly, but resented us. It hurt me, and it opened my eyes to cold, hard reality. Even if you think you really know somebody, you're probably wrong. Falling in love is just a setup for disaster. Nothing ends with a happy ever after."
Louis frowned, "How do you know that? Not everything dies, Paris. Love can last forever."
"CAN," I pointed out, "But it's not guaranteed. Heck, it's not even likely. Love is so fragile nowadays, it's impossible to keep. That's why I don't believe in it."
Louis' eyes widened, "What do you mean?"
"Love doesn't exist."
Louis shook his head, "Why would you believe such a horrible thing?"
"Because it's true, Louis!" I said, trying to make him realize the truth.
"Have you ever tried yourself?" he questioned, "Have you ever dated?"
I shook my head, "What's the point?"
"You learn something new every day," Louis mused.
I sighed, "I don't know why I told you all of that. I don't like you, remember?"
"Of course I remember," he laughed, "The feeling is mutual. But I guess I don't hate you."
I shrugged, "You must be growing on me."
The seatbelt signal suddenly flashed on, and I buckled myself in, preparing for landing.
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hey guuys! so it's monday and updates are back to usual, which means next one is on FR1DAY!
hehe
i hope you enjoyed this one! feedback would be awesome :D
have a goooooooood monday.
-kitcat