ANGELIC – CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
"Go on then." Reiner smirked as he looked down at the silver-haired girl, his arms folded over his chest. His eyes flicked between the boys' cabin and Isabel, his eyebrow twitching in anticipation. "You wanted to play, you're not going to chicken out now, are you?"
Isabel let out a breath and shook her head violently fast, her braids slapping her in the face. She let out a quiet 'ouch' before she folded her arms over her chest. "Well, I think it's just too easy. It's not because I'm a chicken or anything."
"Is that so?" Annie cocked her right eyebrow, her voice monotone as always. "If it's too easy then why don't you steal a shirt from one of the boys and bring it back? Reiner could always take it back for you."
The silver-haired girl's eyes widened as she stared down at the girl in horror, a pout coming onto her lips. Reiner nodded his head, "good one Annie, that sounds interesting, I like it. Isabel, I dare you to sneak into the boys' cabin and steal a shirt."
"I hate you guys." She grumbled back after a few moments.
Isabel turned on her heel and quietly trudged over to the wooden cabin, the lights turned off hours ahead. It had been one of Isabel and Annie's Monday midnight adventures, though this time Reiner had been on an adventure of his own and decided to join the duo.
Her hand wrapped around the door knob before slowly creaking the door open, her eyes narrowed as she took notice of all the sleeping boys. Slowly, she crept into the room, her ears instantly hearing the quiet snores of her comrades.
In the bunk bed by the door were Eren and Armin. The blond was sprawled out on the top bunk, his legs and arms spread out in a starfish position with his blond hair falling in every direction whereas the brunette on the bottom was lying in a fetal position with his hair covering his face. In the next bunk along was Connie and Thomas, the bald boy had his legs hanging off the top bunk almost falling off the bed entirely, whereas Thomas was simply lying on his back.
The next bunk was Jean and Marco. Marco was on the bottom bunk lying on his stomach, his left arm hanging off the bed with his face buried into the pillow, his freckles seemed to be even darker against the whiteness of his linnen. Jean on the other hand, was curled into a ball, his arms wrapped tightly around his pillow, lips parted slightly and hair tousled from rolling around. She smirked as she stood on her tiptoes to get a better look, jade eyes watching carefully as his pillow seemed slightly wet from drool.
"Gross, Kirstein." She whispered in disgust and moved along to the final bunk, Reiner and Bertolt's.
As Reiner was waiting outside for her return with Annie, the bottom bunk was empty. Isabel looked up at her friend to see what sleeping position he was in as she had always heard of his strange positions.
She had to stifle a laugh as she took sight of how he was lying, his arms were folded behind his back as his legs were sprawled up the wall. Isabel shook her head, a smile gracing her features. "So this is what everyone was on about."
As she was about to move to go find a shirt, her eyes caught sight of a long sleeved blue shirt hanging on the end of Bertolt's bed. Her fingers slipped under the fabric and pulled it over her body as she turned on her heel. Mission complete, she thought as she headed back towards the door.
Before she could reopen the door, silent whispers caught her attention from one of the bunk beds. Isabel turned her head over her shoulder to see where the whispering had come from only to realise it was coming from Jean's bed. Oh this will be good, she thought as she crept back over to his bunk and listened to the barely audible sleep talk.
"I'm sorry. I. . . tried." He mumbled out, his arms tightening around his pillow. ". . . omelette."
He's apologising to an omelette? she thought in confusion as she watched him push his head further into his pillow. Isabel cocked her head to the side and leant further over to get a better look, though the only thing she could see clearly was the slight glistening of tears beginning to roll down his cheeks.
"Is somebody there?" Another voice spoke quietly as the sound of a bed creaking slightly. Isabel froze slightly as she turned around to the sound of the voice, her eyes shifted to look at Connie who was now rubbing his eyes. "Isabel, is that you? What're you doing here?"
She was silent for a moment as she thought of an excuse, but there was no good excuse as to why she was in the boys' cabin. "Connie - you're, uh, you're dreaming. Yes, you're dreaming."
"I'm dreaming?" He yawned as he squinted at her. "Why am I dreaming of you wearing Bertolt's shirt?"
Isabel sighed and moved away from Jean's sleeping figure towards the door. "That would be because you - uh - you secretly think Bertolt and I are, uh, a thing. Yes, you secretly think Bertolt and I are a thing."
"Makes sense." He whispered as he lay back down in his bed. Relief washed over her as she edged closer towards the door, her hand holding onto the knob. "He always lets you win when you're doing combat training."
She cocked her eyebrow in confusion and glanced at the sleeping boy before turning her attention back to Connie. "Right. . . Connie go back to sleep please, sweetie."
"I thought I was sleeping?"
"You are." She answered back quickly, her heart hammering against her chest. "But, if you go to sleep in a dream, I will - uh, I'll grant you three magic wishes."
He groaned in response and pulled his blanket back over him as Isabel slowly inched out the door. "That'll be good." He yawned. "Maybe I'll wish for Jean to stop talking about you, he should know you're Bertolt's."
"Yeah - uh, what?" She paused for a second, blinking at the bald boy, she wanted an explanation though it was apparent he had fallen asleep again due to the new sound of snores filling the room. Isabel took her chance to escape and closed the door behind her quietly, confusion swirling inside her.
Isabel's eyes narrowed on the armoured titan's retreating figure as Ymir's titan clung to it's back, she didn't feel joy like she used to when she thought back of their times as comrades - as friends, instead she felt a rage so harsh that if it were personified it'd be the devil itself.
"You're not getting away from me this time you bastards." Isabel hissed as she followed behind the rest of her comrades in attaching her gear to Reiner. She propelled herself forward and landed beside Jean, her blades out waiting for her opportunity to take a slice out of Bertolt when Reiner removed his hands.
"Good luck talking sense into that one, Bertolt." Jean joked. "When something lights a fire under him that's it. Getting Eren to calm down is a lost cause, take my word for it. I've been on the receiving end more than you have. What do you say we teach him patience? Come on, show yourself."
"Give him back." Mikasa said, her tone deadly low. "Right now."
Connie looked down at the armoured hand sadly. "Guys, really? This is some kind of joke right? No way this is you. You've been lying to us this whole time? We were supposed to be comrades."
"They still are." Sasha tried to reason. "This is all just a misunderstanding."
"Where do you think you're going? You can't keep running forever. We're not going to let that happen, rat bastards. Through thick and thin we slept under the same roof as soldiers for three years, matter of fact, the positions you would sleep in were an art form, Bertolt." Jean continued trying to joke, trying to ease him out, though Isabel knew that wouldn't work, her patience was running thin. "I'm not kidding. We all loved waking up to see your contortions in the morning, used to predict the weather with them."
"How'd you do it, Bertolt? Mustn't have had a care in the world." His tone was more serious now. "Lying beside your victims, yet you slept like a log."
"Was it all just an act to you?" Connie piped in. "What about the way we used to talk about surviving this together? About growing old, looking back on the worst of it during drinks. Remember? Was that all bullshit? Answer me! What was the point? What were you trying to do?"
Isabel scoffed as she lowered herself to peek through the slight gap of Reiner's fingers, her eyes meeting Bertolt's instantly. "I - Isabel." Bertolt whispered.
"You've made a fool out of me, Bertolt, and you should know I don't like looking like a fool. I trusted you all, I thought of you three as family when you were nothing but a bunch of frauds. You took advantage of my friendship, but then again. . ." Her face was stone cold, eyes deadly. "Was our friendship a lie to you, Bertolt?"
"No, I - I promise." He spluttered out. "I really did - do consider you a friend!"
"Could've fooled me." She mumbled as she shifted her eyes to her blades before turning to look at him again. "Now let me promise you something, Titan. When you come out of there, I am going to cut you up. I'll skin you alive, maybe make a rug out of your treacherous skin, maybe I'll feed you to my horse, but then again, I wouldn't feed my horse such foul things."
Her lips curled into a smirk as she looked at him. "Take your time coming out of there because I'm going to take mine. I won't show you any mercy, you don't deserve it after all the death and destruction you've caused. I'm going to do it nice and slow, I'll make sure you feel each and every square inch of your flesh being torn apart. You'll feel the pain of every person who has died because of you. You have nobody but to blame but yourself, this was your choice."
"No! You're wrong!" He yelled as he forced his eyes shut. Isabel rolled her eyes and jumped back on top of Reiner's hand, her eyes avoiding the horrified looks of her comrades. "Who chooses to be this? Tell me!"
His yelling had startled everyone into silence, but Isabel wasn't going to be so easily fooled by his pleads. "What do you think I am? Huh?! You think this is what we aspired to be?! People loathe us and why wouldn't they? We're monsters, we deserve to die for the things we've done. We're lost, we could live a thousand years and never again know peace. Try to imagine that darkness. . . The only light was our brief time as soldiers. It was never a lie! Do you understand?! We're not who we said we were but it wasn't an act! We genuinely thought of you as our friends. I'm not stupid. I know I have no right to ask for forgiveness, but please, I beg of you, if we were comrades. . . someone find us."
"Give him back." Mikasa broke the moment's silence. "I won't ask again."
"I'm sorry." Bertolt said from within the armoured shield. "I can't. One of you has to do it, one of you. . . has to stain your hands with my blood."
Isabel ran her hand down her face as she looked at the hand below her. She opened her mouth to speak, to threaten him one last time but alas she was cut off by a yell below her. "Guys! Get down from there and take cover! What the hell is Erwin doing?! He's off his rocker!"
The Scouts turned their attention to the incoming horde of titans led by the Commander himself. The silver-haired girl sighed before turning around, locating Church and jumping down, attaching herself to Reiner's leg to swing onto the horse's back.
Dad what's the plan, she thought as she gripped the reins and began to lead Church in the direction of the dispersing Scouts. She looked over her shoulder to see the armoured titan rushing the group of titans, his arms still hiding Bertolt away. Though his attempt to escape was futile as the titans surrounded him and began to pounce from every angle.
Isabel could only watch as Ymir was forced into action to protect Christa, the screams of both Ymir's titan and the armoured blending together as one loud noise of animalistic horror. Her attention was drawn to her father, his arm stretched out as he began to charge. "All soldiers charge!"
"We've come to the moment of truth! Mankind's fate is decided now! There is no future in which we reclaim these lands without Eren, go! Recover Eren from the armoured titan and retreat! Your heart and soul to the cause!"
Isabel's lips tweaked upwards as she snapped her horse's reins, eager to follow her father, after all, she had always done as he wished. She could hear Mikasa closely behind her, she could also hear the hesitation in Connie's voice as he called for them. "Come on!" Isabel yelled over her shoulder as she glared at her comrades, now wasn't the time to hesitate.
"It's working." Jean said from her left as the armoured titan removed it's arm to beat away the titans, leaving Bertolt vulnerable. Isabel smirked as she started up at the tall boy, won't be long now, she thought. "His hands are down!"
Mikasa nodded from her right. "Nows our chance."
"Uh, Mikasa, you can see those titans right?" Jean asked as he nodded towards the horde of titans. "I mean I get it, you're strong, but that's one hell of a mess, slipping through isn't going to be easy."
Isabel turned her head to face him, a large grin on her face. "I guess that's why we'll help her then, Jean. We were in the top ten of our class, if we can't get him then nobody can. So we will get him back. Mikasa is basically an entire army herself, with us helping her there isn't a doubt about it!"
Thump. Thump. Thump.
There it is again, her stupidly optimistic grin, he thought as his cheeks burned pink. He shook his head as he turned back to facing the titans ahead. Stop it, he thought as he felt his heart pound harshly against his chest, not now, we could die if I don't focus.
"Jheez Jean, you don't need to get all red." Isabel teased as she winked at him. "Don't go crushing on me because I implied you were strong."
"Stop it, I - I'm not red." He retorted, his eyes ahead.
Isabel rolled her eyes and smirked, eyes focused on her father in front of her. "Advance!"
And just like that their plan to rescue Eren didn't seem so simple anymore. Her eyes watched carefully as her father's arm was yanked by a titan, pulling him off of his horse and away from the rest of the group. "Dad!"
"I said advance!" He yelled, his teeth gritted and voice becoming slightly more hard to hear with the distance between them growing. Isabel shook her head and yanked Church's reins, forcing him to turn around and chase after the retreating titan.
Her heart thumped heavily against her chest as she pulled out her blades, teeth gritted tightly together as the tears slowly began to spill. I am not losing you too, she thought as she pushed herself to stand on her horses back. She flicked her head over her shoulder and gave Jean a nod before propelling herself into the air, her blades pulled back and ready to cut down the titan before it devoured the rest of Erwin.
"Support Mikasa, Jean!" Her voice was loud and echoed as he watched over his shoulder, his heart in his throat as he watched her close the gap between herself and her father. "Get Eren back or all of this was for nothing!"
He wanted to help her desperately, wanted to make sure she didn't lose anyone else in her life, God knows she didn't deserve it after the amount of betrayal she had to face so suddenly. But he couldn't help her, she had to do it herself, and he knew she'd be able to do it.
"I believe in you!" He yelled back at her as he watched her attach her hooks for the final time over the nape, he turned his head and advanced, he knew better than to disobey her.
–
Screams. Blood. Titans. There was no hope for anyone alive on the battlefield, they had lost. Isabel rubbed her forehead as she pushed herself forward, her eyes growing wider by the second as she looked around, the only thing she could actually take in were the titans being thrown through the air, her horse nowhere in sight.
Her hands pivoted her around in the grass, eyes searching rapidly for her friends, her father, anyone still alive. That's when she saw them. Not too far away from her was Armin helplessly swinging his blades in a feeble attempt to ward off the titan that was bearing down on himself and an unconscious Jean.
"What - what happened?" She whispered as she tried to push herself up, trying her hardest to figure out how they had ended up in that predicament. Think Isabel, think! She thought as her legs wobbled underneath her.
The last thing she could remember was retreating. We got Eren, she nodded to herself as she steadily stood, her left arm holding tightly onto her right to stop the bleeding that had started. Jade eyes looked down to her waist to see her blades drenched in blood, but it wasn't evaporating, is this my blood?
She shrugged and groaned as she attempted to pick up her blade, she was going to save them, she wasn't about to let her friends be eaten.
"Commander!"
Isabel froze. She had completely forgotten about his arm amidst the chaos. She shook as she turned her head to see him defenselessly sitting in the grass, his blood covering him as another soldier was sacrificed to save him. Her eyes widened, she had to make a choice. Armin and Jean or her father?
Almost as if he could sense her distress, Armin's attention was momentarily placed on her staggering figure. Jade met crystal and it was almost as if they were seeing each other clearly for the last time. Armin offered her a pitiful smile as he continued to drag Jean further back, his eyes glossy under the setting sun. This is it, he thought, it's the end of the line.
Isabel almost dropped to her knees as she returned the smile, dropping her blades and unhooking her gear. I'm sorry, she thought as she spared the pair one last glance, I can't leave him defenseless.
Her legs were moving before she could even process what was happening, her body was stumbling and barely able to keep going under the heavy pressure of thumping of her heart, her eyes dead set on her lone father on the field.
"Dad!" She screamed as she tripped over her own feet. He looked up from his spot, eyes wide as he watched her push herself back onto her feet, forcing herself to keep running to him. He kept his head down, she wasn't sure if it was because he couldn't hear her or if it was because he had given up entirely, but she wasn't going to stop no matter what. She'd continue to run until she could no longer move.
It all happened so fast. Amidst the chaos, above all the screaming and pleas for mercy. Pain had begun to spread around her waist as a large hand yanked her from the ground and lifted her to the air, fingers crushing her flesh as it gawked at Isabel's frightened figure.
She didn't move, she didn't fight back, what was the point? Nobody could save her now. Her eyes cast down on her father, the man's eyes wide as he watched up helplessly as she was pulled into the air. She wanted to call out to him, to tell him that it's okay and she was fine with dying, but the words couldn't escape her lips.
Its' okay, she thought as she closed her eyes, tears slowly escaping her eyes. There was so much that she had done, so much that she was proud of. She had been loved, she had a family, she had friends, but despite all of this, there was something nagging her, telling her that she couldn't give up, she wasn't done.
She turned her head to her left as she let out a choked sob, am I really okay with dying? Everyone was going to die anyway, it wasn't like she was leaving anyone behind, she wasn't going to be missing out on anything, she was living on borrowed time as it was and she was well aware of how lucky she was to have made it that far. She opened her eyes, if she was really going to die, she wanted to take one last look before the inevitable happened.
Time was in slow motion. She couldn't hear anything, she couldn't feel anything, the only thing she could do was watch as the sky slowly began to turn into a burnt orange, the clouds slowly drifting apart. Isabel casted her eyes below her, a smile slowly growing onto her face as she noticed Armin was successfully protecting himself and Jean. Maybe they'll escape, she thought, maybe they'll get away somehow. The thought comforted her and bothered her so much at the same time.
Jean was slumped against Armin's chest, his head hanging low and shaking slightly as Armin waved his blade. She couldn't help but look at him, she couldn't help but be relieved he wouldn't feel his cruel demise if he was unconscious, she didn't care that she'd feel her flesh be torn apart, as long as he didn't.
As the titan's mouth was now wide open and she could feel the heat of the breath on her face, she closed her eyes, the only feeling she felt being one of peace. She was going to die, she had accepted it.
Though death never came. She waited countless seconds to feel the teeth chomp down on her, but instead came a scream from not too far over, and not long after, there was no pain. Perhaps this is death, she thought as she could feel herself falling, her arms and legs falling freely.
She opened her eyes as her body collided with one below her, this was not death, she was still in Hell. Isabel looked up to see her father's face scrunched up in pain as he held her with one arm, his bleeding one behind her back.
"I -" She stuttered. "The titan? I'm alive?"
He smiled weakly as a stray tear escaped his eye. Isabel hissed as she rolled out of his grip, her ribs hurting immensely as she helped him to his feet, her arm outstretched to pull him up. Jade eyes observed the area only to see the titans were nowhere to be seen. Had it all been a hallucination?
"Can you ride on your own?" She asked him.
Erwin simply nodded as he limped over to his horse, refusing any help to climb onto the animal. "Find your horse, we're not losing this chance to escape." He said to Isabel. "All soldiers, retreat!"
Isabel placed her fingers in her mouth and whistled, her eyes screwed shut in pain as she tried her hardest to not let it overcome her. Within a few seconds Church came bounding round the corner, his mane tousled as he stopped in front of her.
Her eyes caught sight of Armin dragging Jean to her left, she paused before dragging her reins towards the duo. "Let me take him." She said sternly, holding her arm out. Armin raised his eyebrow at the girl.
"You - you're injured!" Armin argued as he looked at her bewilderedly. "You almost just died! I can manage."
"I wasn't asking." Isabel grunted as she climbed onto Church. "Hoist him up, I am taking him home, I'm not letting anything else happen to him."
–
"What're you thinking?" Erwin asked. Isabel didn't dare look at him for if she did her tears would burst their banks. His head had been bandaged from a head injury, what was left of his arm had been bandaged and was hidden away under his shirt. "Isabel, look at me."
She forced her eyes to look at him. "What can I say to you, dad? If I'd only been a little quicker maybe I could have saved your arm, maybe I could've -"
"There was nothing you could've done." He said simply. "Stop saying 'what if', there's nothing that could've been done. This was your third mission, if an elite soldier such as myself couldn't have done anything, what makes you think you could've?"
"But I-"
"You did the best you could." He assured, his remaining hand placed on top of hers, lips curled into a reassuring smile. "Thanks to you I'm alive, you saved my life Isabel, you also escorted Mr. Kierstein to safety regardless of your own injuries."
Her cheeks burned red as she shook her head, jade eyes avoiding his blue. "I did what any good soldier would do, I couldn't let you two die."
The room sat in an uneasy silence for a moment before Erwin sighed, he looked down at his hand, the silver band on his finger causing a sad smile to grace his lips. "You remind me so much of your mother, you know."
Isabel's head shot up, her eyes wide in curiosity. "What?"
"I see her everytime I look at you." His voice cracked slightly. "You may look like me, but you pull all the same expressions as she used to. Earlier when you were bickering with Mr. Kirstein, the face you were making when you looked up at him, your mother used to make the exact same face when I used to wind her up."
She raised her eyebrow, a smirk crawling onto her face. "What? A look of disgust?"
"Let me give you a bit of advice, Iz." Erwin said with a sigh, his hand gripping onto hers. "Time goes quick and life isn't going to wait around for you to figure out how you feel. I know you and if you're anything like your mother, I know when you're avoiding your feelings. If I could go back in time and tell your mother how I felt just a second earlier just so I could spend a moment longer with her, I would do it. Today was a reminder that everything can be taken from you so fast, and I think you realised it too."
Isabel didn't answer him.
"You've spent enough time with me, now go." He said with a smile, dismissively waving at her. "You should go check in with Mr. Kirstein, see how he's doing."
"But dad-"
"That's an order."
–
He sat in the infirmary bed, his eyes cast out the window, completely ignoring Connie and Sasha's babbling beside him. He didn't care about what they were rambling about, he just wanted to collect his thoughts.
So much had happened, so much had changed, he didn't know where to start. He had roughly been in the room for around two hours and not one moment of that one hundred and twenty minutes had he had quiet. Connie and Sasha had been talking before he had even woken up, he wasn't sure if they were even aware he was awake.
". . . I heard his arm was chewed straight off."
Jean's eyes flickered to the duo, his attention now focused on the conversation. Connie nodded his head quickly, waving his arms rapidly. "It was! Luckily Isabel was quick to help, she just jumped into action."
"Well what do you expect?" Sasha asked as she flicked Connie's forehead. "It's her dad you idiot."
"Who're you calling an idiot?!" Connie scoffed as he flicked Sasha's forehead. "I know you're not calling me an idiot, potato girl."
Sasha slapped her hand over her mouth as she glared at the bald boy. "Wow. I see how it is, Q ball."
The insulting names went back and forth, each one getting worse and worse, though Jean knew they would stop soon, they always did. His eyes were drawn to the door as a barely audible knock was heard. "Will you two shut up and answer the door?"
The duo stopped bickering and turned to face the door. Sasha jumped to her feet first, her hand wrapping around the door knob tightly before swinging it open. "It's Isabel!" She yelled loudly.
"Stop yelling!" Connie shouted from beside Jean before he stood up and moved to Sasha's side. He cuffed his hand around her ear and whispered before looking over at Jean, his lips tugged into a smile. "We have to go."
Sasha sniggered. "Yeah, we have to - uh - make sure Armin took his bath. Yeah."
Jean narrowed his eyes at the quietly giggling duo, watching as they skulked out of the room and closed the door behind them. He shook his head and rubbed his temples, they're literal children, he thought.
"Is it okay if I sit with you for a while?" Isabel finally spoke up, her voice barely above a whisper. "My dad kicked me out of his room."
The two-toned boy lifted his head and looked at her for a few moments, blinking at her. "S - sure."
He watched carefully as she shuffled onto the chair by his bedside, her eyes avoiding his. Her right arm had been bandaged but the blood had seemed to bleed through the cloth, her face had several scrapes and cuts on it, dried blood all across her face, she seemed more worse for wear than he did, why wasn't she in a bed?
Her hair had been taken out of the braids and instead was tied at the back of her head in a bun, for the exemption of stray hairs let out framing her face. She wore a simple short sleeved blue button up that showed off her bandage, paired with a black skirt that finished just below her knee, despite having just come back from Hell, she didn't look anywhere near as bad.
He didn't know what to say to her, if it were any other day he'd have made a remark about how she was always getting herself bruised and bloodied, but after their journey to rescue Eren, he wasn't so sure what to say to her. He felt awkward, how was he supposed to really talk to her after he'd thought about her in that way?
Jean cleared his throat and fumbled with his fingers, cheeks slightly rosy. Be normal, he thought, just be normal.
"Does it hurt?" He asked, Isabel lifted her head and watched as he nodded towards her arm. "Must've been a deep cut."
Isabel shrugged. "Not as bad as you'd think, my ribs hurt more."
"Then why aren't you resting?" Jean pestered. "I'm on bedrest and I only had a concussion."
She smirked. "Well that's just because you're lazy. Don't think I haven't forgotten about your dream to live a cushioned life in the interior."
"That's my old dream." He scoffed, folding his arms over his chest. "I have a new dream now."
"If you say so." Isabel laughed quietly.
Jean shook his head and tilted his head to look out the window, the sky was littered with stars, each one glistening down brightly. He let a smile crawl onto his lips as he recounted the night they had sat outside the stables and talked under the stars for what felt like forever.
Hesitantly he turned to face her, his face bright red as he shuffled along on the bed. "Sit with me." He said nodding towards the empty seat. "You have a better view of the stars from this angle."
Isabel looked at him momentarily before standing up and sitting beside him, pushing off her boots and pulling her knees to her chest, eyes looking out the window. Jean watched carefully as her eyes jumped from star to star, with each one she looked at, her smile grew slightly.
He felt a lot more at ease beside her than he did with Connie and Sasha, or anyone else for that matter. All he knew was that he loved her company, despite their many arguments and disagreements, she was possibly his favourite person to be around.
Isabel grinned and looked up at him, his breath hitched and his cheeks began to heat up more than they already had. He could've sworn his favourite colour was purple, but when he saw her big round eyes glistening under the moonlight looking at him in a way that caused his heart to leap into his mouth, he could confidently say his favourite colour was now green.
Her smile slowly dropped from her face as she chewed on the inside of her cheek. Jean's eyebrows furrowed as he looked down at her, had he caused her frown? "What are you thinking about, Bells?"
"Bells?" She asked, raising her eyebrow slightly.
His eyes widened. "I - uh -"
"Bells. . ." She sounded out. "I like it."
He let out a sigh of relief and ran his hand down his face. "And to answer your question, I was actually thinking about asking you one."
"Oh?" He asked as he peaked through his fingers. "And what was that question?"
She sighed and looked back out of the window. "When are you going to tell her you like her?"
Jean's eyebrows knitted together in confusion. "What? Who?"
"Mikasa. . ." She said like it was the most obvious thing, though he couldn't quite help but question the slight bitterness that came from her lips when she spoke the name. "You saved her life today, surely that's earned you some brownie points."
Jean paused for a moment as he looked down at Isabel, his lips curling into a slight smile as he watched her eyes shine as she counted the stars. "Why would I tell Mikasa I like her?"
Isabel turned to face him."You've been obsessed with her for forever, Jean."
"Maybe that's changed." He whispered, more to himself than her, as he twirled a stray strand of her hair around his finger. His heart hammered against his chest but he couldn't help himself from reaching out and touching her in some way.
She scoffed, averting her eyes as her cheeks burned bright red. "Yeah right, you've probably already practiced in the mirror how you'll tell her." She cleared her throat before doing her best impression of him. "'Oh Mikasa, your hair looks lovely today! Would you care to go for a walk through the woods outside so I can confess my undying love for you?'"
Jean couldn't help the laugh that escaped his lips at her impression, had it been anyone else, he probably would've cursed them out. Maybe it was the full moon in the sky or maybe he'd matured and realised his feelings for Mikasa were nothing more than a childish fantasy.
"What's so funny?!" Isabel exclaimed as she swatted his hand away from her hair, her hand gripping onto his shirt tightly as she pulled his head closer to hers. "I may be injured but I'll still kick your ass."
Jean let a tiny smile crawl onto his face as he looked down at her, his forehead pressed against hers.
Thump. Thump. Thump.
What is that? She thought as her lips parted slightly, her eyes staring into his half closed ones. What is this feeling? She would've pushed him away any other time, but for some odd reason she couldn't bring herself to shove him away.
It's because he's injured and I don't want to hurt him. She lied to herself, but even she knew that the lie wasn't convincing.
"Life isn't going to wait around for you to figure out how you feel." Her father's words rang in the back of her mind as she scanned his face for any signs of him wanting her to let go, but he seemed even more relaxed in this position than she was. Does he feel this too?
Isabel blushed furiously and pushed him back slightly, her heart rattling so harshly against her ribcage she could practically hear it. She turned her head to look out the window, her eyebrows knitted together as she tried to decipher what it was she was feeling.
"Sorry for laughing at you, Bells." Jean said softly, he hesitated for a moment before wrapping his arm around her shoulder. "It was a. . . cute impression."
Isabel's eyes widened slightly at his words, cute. That was the one word she didn't think she'd hear come from Jean's lips about her, he thinks I'm. . . cute?
It was as if her body was on autopilot, she sank into his body and allowed his arm to fall further down her shoulder, the back of her head resting in the crook of his neck and his chin falling on top of her head.
She wasn't sure what she felt, all she knew was that a part of her soul longed for his, and that was good enough for her.