#MMIM39
"Hi, Claire! Hello, there." I said in the babiest voice I could accumulate. "So pretty naman! Yes naman, like tita!"
"Huy, bilhin mo na yung ice sa 7/11!"
"Bossy talaga your dad, Claire!" I still said in a baby voice. "Eto na!"
Kakarating lang ni Claire dito sa bahay nila galing sa opsital kaya naman may pa-party sina Claude. Christmas eve rin ngayon kaya sinabay na nila sa Christmas party.
"Ano pa bibilhin?" tanong ko kay Claude.
"Chips?" He smiled. "Kahit ano. Basta ice importante!"
Tumango ako at dumiretso na sa labas para pumunta sa sasakyan ko. Claude and Raffy have their own house, kaya hindi ko na kapit-bahay si Claude.
Itong bahay nila ngayon, sobrang OA sa laki! Akala mo magkakaroon sila ng 12 na anak, eh! I guess Claude had a lot of money earned from his old businesses in Manila, kaya naman madali lang para sa kanila na patayuin 'tong bahay nila.
Dumiretso ako sa pinaka-malapit na 7/11 at bumili ng ice. Kumuha na rin ako ng kung anu-anong pagkain para hindi maubusan ng chips doon mamaya.
Ngumuso ako habang tinitignan yung mga soft drinks na naka-lagay doon samay ref ng 7/11. As I reached out to grab some coke and sprite, may isang babaeng naunahan pa akong kumuha no'n.
"Ay sorry," she said. "Here.."
Napataas ang dalawang kilay ko nang makitang si Theo pala 'yon. I've already seen her last year at the Christmas party of the Mayor, but not up close.
"Okay lang. Sa'yo na." I smiled.
"Thanks." She nodded. "Nat, right?"
"Yeah." I nodded. "Hi, Theo."
"I saw you pala sa social media ni Vale. You're his girlfriend now, right?" She smiled. Para akong nasilaw sa sobrang puti ng kaniyang ngipin.
Tumango ako. "Girlfriend."
Tumawa naman siya habang hawak hawak yung coke. "Okay. Thanks for the coke. Sorry at nauna ako."
Napakunot ang noo ko habang naglalakad siya patungo sa counter. She immediately paid and left. I shook my head and laughed.
"Hey, babe," sagot ni Vale sa tawag pagkapasok ko ng sasakyan. "Merry Christmas!"
"Makakaabot ka ba sa Christmas party nina Claude?"
Ngumuso siya. "I don't think so, pero try ko humabol, love."
"Aw," I pouted. This was supposed to be my first time seeing him in a few months. And it's Christmas eve!
"Sorry," He sighed. "Nasaan ka?"
"Outside 7/11. I saw your ex pala."
Tumaas ang kilay niya. "Huh?"
"Theo." I laughed. "Still hasn't changed, I guess."
"Ay," Tumawa rin siya. "Ex ko ba 'yon?"
Nanliit naman ang mga mata ko sa kanya. Hindi niya pa nakikwento ang una niyang ex. I remember that one night, Valentine's 'yon, and he sung at Church.. and he mentioned an ex before he started singing! Sino kaya 'yon?
"What?" He laughed.
"Sino mga ex mo?"
Mas lumakas ang tawa niya. "You really want to have this conversation?"
"Unfair naman! Si Claude lang kilala mong past ko!" Humalukipkip ako. "Di ko pa siya ex. Ex-crush lang."
"Ex-crush but you loved him."
"Akala mo naman di mo minahal si Raffy."
"I love her as a friend."
"Edi I love Claude as a friend."
"As a friend nga lang ba dati?" He raised an eyebrow.
"Inaaway mo ba ako?!" My forehead creased.
Tumawa naman siya at umiling. "I'll call you later, babe. Tumatawag si Mama."
I nodded. "Bye! Love you!"
"Love you."
Nagmaneho na ako pabalik sa bahay nina Claude, at laking gulat ko naman nang makitang nandoon na rin sina Elijah. I've been in Baguio since Claude and Raffy's accident, pero ngayon ko lang ulit nakita yung mga Churchmates namin!
"Nat!" Ngiti niya sa akin. "Merry Christmas!"
"Merry Christmas!" I smiled back. "Kailan ka pa nakabalik ng Pilipinas?"
"Last week," he said. "Nasaan naman boyfriend mo? Updated ako, ha."
Tumawa naman ako habang nilalagay yung ice cream at ice sa freezer nina Raffy. "Busy sa Manila!"
Nagkwentuhan kami tungkol sa pagmimissions niya sa ibang bansa, at nag-catch up rin siya sa iba naming nga Churchmates. The party finished early, so I went straight home after helping them clean up.
Tinignan ko yung cellphone ko bago matulog, at mukhang wala na ngang balak mag-text o tumawag si Vale.
Kinagat ko ang labi ko at nagsimulang mag-type ng text para sa kanya.
To: Vale Epal
Hi love, Merry Christmas!
Hindi na-deliver yung iMessage ko sa kany, kaya naman tuluyan na akong natulog. Nagising na lang ako, at nandoon na sa tabi ko si Claude. Kumunot ang noo ko. Paano naman siya napadpad dito?
"Good morning!" malakas niyang bati. "Merry Christmas!"
"Ano ba?" I groaned while placing my other pillow on top of my head. "Ang aga aga, Claude. Wala pa nga yung araw, oh!"
"Tara na, Nat." Hinila niya bigla yung comforter ko, kaya parang bumuhos sa akin yung lamig ng kwarto ko. Pasko pa naman ngayon! Sobrang lamig!
Tumayo agad ako para hablutin yung comforter kay Claude. Agad akong bumalik sa kama at sinubukang matulog ulit, pero hinablot ulit 'yon sa akin.
"Ang hirap mo kausap!" Reklamo niya. "Tara na."
Nagbuntong hininga ako at tumayo. Humalukipkip ako at sinamaan siya ng tingin, habang siya naman ay naka-ngisi lang.
"I hate you!"
"I love you, too, Nat!" He laughed. "Maligo ka na. Dali, 5 minutes!"
I didn't even get to check my phone! Tinulak agad ako ni Claude sa loob ng CR at dali-dali akong naligo. Nag-leggings na lang ako at oversized crewneck sweatshirt dahil sobrang lamig talaga. When we both got to Claude's car, wala pa rin talagang sun! Sobrang dilim pa sa labas.
"Saan ba tayo pupunta?" Humalukipkip ako. "Paskong pasko, Claude, ha."
Nginitian niya naman ako. "Wala ka bang tiwala sa akin?"
"Wala!"
Tumawa siya habang nagmamaneho. He sped up, since wala naman masyadong mga sasakyan ng ganitong oras. Nagulat na lang ako na dumaan na siya ng Botanical Garden, hindi pa rin kami nakakarating sa pupuntahan namin.
"Saan nga tayo pupunta?" I asked. "Gutom na ako."
"Magdadasal," he answered. Kumunot naman ang noo ko.
"Edi magdasal ka sa sarili mong bahay! Ihatid mo na ako pabalik!"
Muli siyang tumawa at lumiko papasok sa APTS. Kumunot agad ang noo ko sa kanya habang siya naman ay tahimik na nagmamaneho.
"Ipagha-hike mo ako?!" Reklamo ko. "Inunahan mo pa yung araw, Claude! Hayop ka!"
He parked the car beside one other car and immediately went out. I reluctantly went out of the car and and groaned. It's probably around 10 degrees out. Bakit ba neto naisipan na mag-hiking ng ganitong oras? Sa ganitong araw pa?!
"Napaka-pangit ng ugali mo, Claude." I said in between breaths as we walked up the prayer mountain. Lumingon lang siya sa akin, pero hindi ako sinagot.
Unti-unting lumiwanag ang paligid namin habang paakyat doon. Once we reached the top, I took a breath as I watched the city lights slowly fade. The way the sun met the sky, how it playfully gave color to it made me feel like the early morning was worth it. The sun slowly rose above the outline of the mountains, and the cold air made the smell of the pine trees even more distinct.
Lumingon ako kay Claude. Maybe he really wanted to see the sunrise. I get it. Raffy's too weak, and Claire's at home.
Bago pa ako makapag-salita ay bumalikas na agad siya habang nakapamulsa. Hahabulin ko sana siya pero nakaramdam ako bigla ng pitik sa likod ko. To my surprise, Vale was standing there with a big smile on his face.
"Merry Christmas!" He smiled.
"Ikaw may pakana neto?!" Hinablot ko kaagad yung buhok niya. "Alam mo ba kung gaano ako kaaga ginising ni Claude?!"
"Ow!" Tumawa siya.
Halos maiyak ako nung nakita ko yung mukha niya. I haven't seen him, I haven't been able to hug him.. in months!
"Bakit ka nanggugulat?" I punched his chest, but pulled him in for a hug. Bahagya naman siyang tumawa at hinalikan ang ibabaw ng ulo ko.
"I missed you." He sighed.
HIndi ko na napigilan ang iyak ko. I didn't think I could miss someone this much. I didn't think someone's presence could even make me cry.
"Bakit ka umiiyak?" He laughed while wiping my tears off.
"I missed you!" I tried to laugh between my tears. "Kainis. 'Di ka man lang umakyat."
He gave me a big smile and pulled me in closer to hug me even tighter.
"Sorry I couldn't make it last night," aniya. "Guess where I was?"
"Nambababae?" I joked while still buried in his chest. Ramdam ko agad ang pag-taas ng dibdib niya dahil sa pag-tawa.
"Close," pamimilosopo niya. "I was with my dad.."
Napatingin ako sa kanya. There was definitely something different. He seemed happier. Lighter.
"Talaga?" I smiled.
He nodded. "Process, right?"
I was beyond proud of him. I saw how much his dad has affected him in the past. Alam ko yung hinanakit at pighati na pinanghahawakan niya. This is a huge thing for him!
"I'm proud of you!" I held his hand. "Ang bilis mo naman ata makarating dito?"
Lumingon naman siya sa likod niya, kaya tumagos na rin ang tingin ko doon. I saw Hanzo in his usual clothes, pero mukhang yung helicopter niya ang ginamit nila para makapunta dito.
Mayabang!
"Sabi ko na nga ba, dala mo kabet natin." I laughed. Parehas kaming tumawa habang tinitignan niya ang mga mata ko. Nginitian ko siya, at nilagay niya naman yung buhok ko sa likod ng tenga ko.
"You know.. on the way here I was reminded of the reason for this season," he softly said. "God has always been a big part of our lives."
I nodded. Kaya okay lang naman sa akin kung hindi siya maka-uwi dito ng Baguio. Yes, I've missed him, but this is not a time for our celebration with each other, but us celebrating the birth of our King.
"I'm still in awe of how in love you are with Him," aniya. "I know that one day, kapag nagkita na kami ng Panginoon, when I ask Him who He gave, alam kong ikaw yung binigay Niya. You're the one He sent for me to be reminded. For me to get back in the right path."
"Vale.." Hindi ko pa rin mapigilan ang iyak ko.
Bakit naman kasi siya nagpapaiyak?!
"I know this is sudden, love." Kinapa kapa niya yung bulsa niya. "But I almost went crazy these past months. Sobrang takot ko. I was scared that one day, I'd wake up and you wouldn't answer the call. Maybe one day, I'd drive to Baguio and you wouldn't be here. You're the one I want to wake up each morning to. You're the one I want to see before I go to sleep."
Hindi ko alam kung bakit ako nakaramdam ng kaluwagan sa dibdib ko. I was afraid that I was the only one that felt that way.
"You accept me for all I am, but make me want to become a better me." He laughed. "You've taught me.. shown me how to forgive."
I tried wiping off my tears, pero hindi pa rin sila tumitigil. Is he holding what I think he's holding?
"You are the only one I want to spend my victories and valleys with. The only one I want to be with, standing before God, laying our battles and triumphs," mahimbing niyang sabi. He slowly got down on one knee and opened the black box, and there stood the most beautiful engagement ring I have ever seen in my life. "If you aren't ready, it's okay with me. I'll wait."
"But if it's okay with you.." He smiled. "Will you marry me?"
The sun was up right above the mountains, and the sunlight perfectly hit the ring.
Looking at him, standing on one knee, made me think back to all the battles we've been through before. All the triumphs we have yet to experience. All the victories we'll have with the Lord.
It made me remember that night. The night I wanted to give up. The night I felt so lonely, I could physically feel the pain. The night I couldn't call Vale, because he left. Because he pushed me away. Because things weren't in our favor.
But most of all, it made me remember what Raffy told me when I was at the brink of losing faith. The pain I've been feeling can't compare to the joy that's coming. Romans 8:18.
It made me remember God's promise.
And that promise is him.
"Yes."