Sopping silk falls to the ground with a wet smack as Lilliarna steps out of her clothing. She sneezes quietly, sniffling before reaching to grab a rough towel from the rack and blot the water from her hair. Tossing on Theon's shirt, she exits the bathroom, leaving her undergarments discarded on the floor with her dress. A few feet away, Theon lay on the bed, his body propped up on the pillows with his arms crossed behind his head as his chest rises and falls in the soft spilling light from a bedside lamp. His body is bare of any clothes save for his briefs, leaving everything on display for her wandering eyes. She notices the way his body is not spectacularly built, his muscles less defined than she had imagined an alpha's being. Instead, his muscular body is veiled by a thin layer of fat, giving a solid look to him without making him look overly Herculean. An air of strength floats idly around him, even as he dozes off, testament to his position of power.
Lilliarna's nose twitches with an invisible itch and her lungs suck in a quick, sharp breath. For a moment she pauses, the world around her freezing in time before softly exhaling, almost as if in a small sigh of relief. She lets her lips curve into a smile at the minor victory. Her mate's body commands her attention once again as she moves towards the bed, her knee finding its edge as she crawls next to him, careful not to wake him from his sleep. Then suddenly she loses control as another deep inhale fills her chest before erupting in a small explosion of breath from her mouth.
Startled by the sudden noise, Theons eyes dart open, scanning the room before landing back on his mate. His heart beat slows and his lips tug up into a smirk on one side as she sniffles daintily. He wraps his arms around her lazily, pulling her body down next to him on the bed. Lilliarna turns, pouting as big puppy dog eyes stare up at him.
"I woke you."
"No you didn't"
Her nose scrunches and she scoffs before laughing as she pokes at his chest.
"You were snoring Theon."
"I don't snore."
"Oh, but you do, my love." She taps his forehead before her fingers find their way into his hair, bushing back the damp tangled mess. "It's quite angelic, actually. Like a baby."
"I do not sound like a-" Theon's eyes light up at the realization of her words. "My love?"
His brow cocks teasingly at her.
"I should have known that wouldn't get past you." She rolls into his chest, burying her face into him to avoid his gaze, her cheeks red hot. "It just felt right... I can stop if you'd like."
"No. Please never stop, little mate." He places a light kiss on the top of her head. "You can call me whatever your heart desires."
A mischievous smile spreads across her face, "Anything? So you wouldn't mind if I called you.. Oh, I don't know. Pookie Bear?"
Theon wrinkles his nose in disgust before pulling her in for a tight squeeze. His voice is overly happy as he speaks.
"I suppose you can do as you please, Cutie patootie."
Groaning, she pushes against his chest in protest.
"No. Nope. No way. I'd rather hear you call me your little mate any day over sweet cheeks."
She rolls her eyes as she sits up, catching his tongue darting out at her like a small child.
"And I would vastly prefer my love over, pookie bear."
"I prefer it too."
Lilliarna nods, settling back into his arms to breathe in his scent. Theon's fingers run the length of her hair, stopping every so often as he stumbles upon a knot to work it out gently. Soft tingles caress her skin as they massage her scalp, melting away the years of built up stress. Her eyes drift close as she focuses on the slow rhythmic drumming of his heartbeat. Its pace dances with hers, the sounds of their breathing melding in to create a quiet symphony writing out their love. Goosebumps stand to attention over her skin as Theon runs his thumb lightly over her upper arm, the familiar tingles running along under his touch. For years she'd spent her time as a rogue, running, never settling in one place for long. Now here in his arms she can't help but think how his arms feel like home around her.
Lilliarna draws in a long, slow breath, counting to ten before letting it back out. Cairon was right; he deserved to know, and she fears that waiting any longer, the words will be unable to form in her mouth.
"Theon?"
"Yes, little mate?"
"I need to tell you something."
Lilliarna sits up, drawing her knees close to her chest. The bed shifts next to her as Theon scoots up, moving to brush away a strand of hair from her face.
"Ok, Talk."
"I told you I have, things, that haunt me from my past."
Theon nods for her to continue.
"Well, I- I'm scared that once you know what those things are-" She chews nervously at her lip, "I know you're going to leave me."
"There's nothing in this world bad enough to make me leave you."
Lilliarna flinches away from his touch as he reaches to cup her cheeks. She tries to force the words out, her mouth opening and closing several times in their absence.
"You're worrying me, little mate. Whatever it is, just tell me. You have nothing to be so afraid of."
"I killed an Alpha Theon."
The words spill from her mouth like vomit and instantly she regrets them as Theon's body visibly stiffens on the bed. The outstretched hand slowly pulls back, and his head turns away from her, refusing to meet her eyes. Words come thick and heavy through gritted teeth.
"Which Alpha, Lilliarna."
"What-"
"Which Alpha did you kill?" His jaw clenches tighter, its edge becoming razor sharp.
"I-it was the Alpha of the Willow Pack."
Lilliarna stammers, reaching desperately for Theon as he stands from the bed. Her hands come up empty and he moves further across the room; walking to the door, he looks back at her, anger seething in his eyes.
"All this time, it was you."
He looks down at the floor in thought while his fingers comb roughly through his hair. After a few minutes, he looks up, his gaze settling back on Lilliarna as his eyes flick over the features of her face. A word hangs in the air as he breathes it out.
"Why?"
She looks wide eyed back at him.
"I- I was contacted by a man who wanted to hire me. He offered a pretty large payment, and initially I refused. But then he- he." She looks down at her wrists, remembering the heavy feeling of chains as she bites her lip hard, her teeth drawing blood. "I didn't want to kill anyone, Theon. You have to believe me."
Obsidian black eyes stare back at her before he turns, a large hand meeting the wall with a sickening crunch. His fist slides from the newly smashed hole as he storms from the room, the door slamming behind him. Panic seizes her body as bile rises in her throat. Running to the bathroom, she barely makes it to the toilet as her stomach contents violently empty into the bowl. Tears sting her eyes as a feeling of emptiness crawls throughout her body. Quietly curling her body into a tight ball on the cold tile floor, Lilliarna shakes as she struggles to take in a breath. Her lungs feel as if they're in a vice, being slowly crushed from every angle.
She struggles to look over as the door crashes open, its knob lodging deep in the bathroom wall, keeping the door from closing. A calloused hand grabs her arm, helping her to roll so she lays flat on her back on the floor. Above her, a vaguely familiar set of eyes is wide with worry, searching her for any injuries.
"Breathe Luna. Everything is going to be ok."
Her words come out through forced choppy gasps, "He left me."
Elliot is quiet for a moment, his eyes glazing over slightly as he attempts to reach his Alpha.
"Damit, Theon, you can't just block me out like this." His attention turns back to Lilliarna, her body writhing under him, "It's going to be ok Luna."
She shakes her head no, lungs too weak to allow her to speak. He didn't understand; Theon had left her, she was no longer his Luna, and the word only caused her more unwanted pain. Stumbling to her feet Lilliarna forces herself from the bathroom on unsteady legs, crashing to her hands and knees as they give out halfway to the bed. Black tinges her vision as she continues forcefully pulling air into her lungs. At this rate the panic attack would surely pull her into unconsciousness. Silently she curses to no one in particular, angry that she'd let Cairon convince her everything would be ok once she told him.
Lilliarna slips as she attempts to stand back to her feet and her body prepares for a hard landing that never comes; instead, she lands softly in Elliot's arms. Her body weakly flails, trying to fight as he picks her up, stopping only as she realizes she's too weak to get away.
"Tell me what I can do to help you Luna."
"Phone." She huffs out, pointing in the direction of her nightstand.
Elliot helps her to the bed, assisting her in laying back before quickly running to retrieve the phone. Depositing it in her hands, he watches as she types out a message. Her thumb hovers over the small blue button before inevitably hitting send.
"Are you sure that's a good idea?" He asks.
Lilliarna knows what he means, but pushes it aside. Theon had given up his right to be jealous over her once he walked out. He was gone and had left her, along with a sizable hole in the hotel bedroom wall. The knowledge of that fact was painful enough and she whimpers at the thought of the pain she will experience once he truly severs their mate bond. Her mind wanders back to the agonizing torture her boss had put her through nearly a year prior. She had given in to save her life, to end the abuse, but now she only wishes that he had killed her, that she had succumbed to the wounds. If that had been the case, she wouldn't be facing the empty future that now lay ahead of her.
Throwing the phone to her side, she curls her body into a tight ball once again, trying desperately to keep Elliot from seeing the tears that wouldn't quit falling. It was useless, however, as she's sure her sobbing fills every inch of the surrounding room.