Masterful, prideful, gracious, kind, and rich. These are all things I am - so I'd like to say. In reality, I'm merely an average guy living a mediocre life doing, well, mediocre things.
I left my home when I was sixteen in search of something better as all I had growing up was a father who tried his damnedest to provide, but fell short due to drug addiction. He was hurt when I left, but I didn't have much of a choice. I spent the following years searching for and going from job to job making the barest of ends meet.
Nothing ever went well for me, no matter how much I tried. The first job I got was working for a carpenter. I made sense of the basics of what they needed me to do quite quickly, but the company went bankrupt less than a month after I was hired.
My next job found me working in a fast-food restaurant as a janitor. My employment lasted barely more than a month as the place burned to the ground due to faulty wiring. I escaped unscathed, albeit jobless once more.
Several days later, I made my way to yet another job interview. I stood at the corner of a quiet intersection waiting for the crosswalk sign to give me the go-ahead.
A crappy sedan, probably older than I was, screeched around the corner just as I stepped out to cross the street. I made it about a third of the way across when I was struck.
Time slowed to a near halt as my mind tried to process the situation. The light was red. The crosswalk sign was lit for pedestrian crossing. A woman was behind the wheel of the crappy sedan that was now pushing me down the street.
Pain rocketed through my body, searing my mind with its intensity. Then, my world went black as the last breath left my body. That was probably the moment I died.
When I next opened my eyes, I beheld a strange sight. I was standing on a glowing, iridescent green pathway. In front of me was a long line of people. None of them appeared to be paying attention to their surroundings, merely staring straight ahead. I looked beyond them to see a woman sitting on a resplendent chair. It had a weird oscillation of colors that made it hard to look at, almost as if wasn't real.
The first thing I noticed about the woman in the chair was a golden halo floating above Her head. I figured I definitely died by that point and maybe She was God. I couldn't really see Her face as there was this strange mirage-like motion that blurred Her features. She wore this elegant gown that flowed down and moved like a feather in a gentle breeze.
The gown, like the chair oscillated into a multitude of colors. There wasn't anything else around the pathway. It was just blackness.
I followed the line, slowly moving closer to the front. I almost forgot to mention, there wasn't any sound, and I couldn't see what was happening to the people in front of me, at least, until I was close enough to God. I peeked around those few people only to see the girl standing directly in front of God vanish. There was no sound, no special effects, she just . . . blipped into nothingness.
I was extremely nervous at this point. I was about to come face-to-face with God. The God. Who'd of known God was a woman? I surely didn't, then again, I wasn't a religious person.
An indiscernible amount of time passed until I was in the spotlight. I scratched at the back of my head and chuckled audibly. God moved at my gesture, wrapping one leg over the other and leaning Her head against Her hand. She looked down at me, but I couldn't determine Her expression.