// Talks about insecurities like stretch marks and body weight.
Chubby reader! :D
In this story I'm kinda putting my feelings a bit?? This one is a pretty long one
Hopefully this one isn't that confusing
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Y/n's POV:
(Forgot to add this in the start of the story but the story takes place at Nicks house)
Me, my boyfriend (Nick) and his friends Dream and George decided that we would go to the beach together tomorrow. I was super excited since we were going to have lots of fun and I really love swimming but the thing is I don't like wearing clothes that expose my body especially bikinis since I have stretch marks and I would always try to avoid the beach or I try to cover up. It was early in the morning Nick and the others downstairs talking about who is going to drive and plans on how they are going to spend the day over at the beach. I was showering and had my hands on my face, I didn't know weather to wear a bikini or not go...
Thoughts in my head were overwhelming me.
I turn off the shower and grabbed my towel to dry myself. I got out and looked at the long mirror at the door showing my whole body.
The long stretch marks and my body shape...
How Can Nick love me when I look like this
He's never seen me with my body exposed but if he did he would definitely leave me.
My eyes were getting glossy and tears wanting to spill out from just looking at my body and listening to my thoughts in my head. I all of the sudden heard a knock on the door. "Yes?" Trying to sound normal and drying the bit of tears that went down my face. "Me and the others decided to go to the mall to shop the things we need for tomorrow get changed so we can go ok?" He said in a exciting tone. "Yea sure i will be downstairs since I'm done changing" I said as start putting on my clothes quick. I get out of the bathroom and went straight to nicks room picking out clothes I will wear. I picked out a y/f/c crew neck sweater and mom jeans with some white Nike Airs. I brush my hair fixing it a little and adding a bit of eyeliner. I grab my phone and purse going downstairs to find Nick and the others waiting for me. "Who's gonna drive?" "I am" Nick said with a smile. I give him a small smile and we all walk to the car. Dream and George fighting like kids in the back and I sit in the front with Nick.
Nick starts the car and we leave, Nick puts his hand on my thigh, I look at him and I see him smiling and looking at the road. I smile back putting my hand on his the rest of the drive like that never leaving my hand on his. We get to the parking lot of the mall and Nick finding a parking spot, we park and get out of the car.
We all get to the mall going to different stores and acting like crack heads, until we found a store that sells swimsuits and bikinis for women. I look at the store and I looked back at Nick who was already staring at me. I look back at the store, knowing what happened today and thinking about it again, I decided to go and try on some since i had a bit of confidence and I didn't want to tell Nick that I felt uncomfortable with exposing my body and feeling like I didn't want to go to the beach because of that. "We can go together and leave these dumbasses here" he said looking back at them, "yea sure" you said. "Clay! I'm going to a store with y/n you dumbasses can stay here or go somewhere I'll let you guys know when we're done." " ok babe" he said "hey!" George said punching clays arm. We started laughing and went our separate ways.
My smile faded when we got in the store, I was starting to regret my decision of going. Thoughts in my head were starting to hunt me. If Nick sees that I will go with a t shirt at the beach and go to swim like that he will find it weird and the others too you thought. In the store there was a lot of girls...
Skinny girls some with their friends others alone and here I was, the only one who wasn't like them. "Hey you ok?" Nick said.
"Huh oh uh yea just looking at the swimsuits" I said with a fake giggle. I looked at the swimsuits and their was one that caught my attention. It was a bikini and it was f/c with f/c strips. It looked pretty but unfortunately it was a two piece but I had to do it and I wanted to see what I would look in a bikini, this kind of confidence came over me a bit. I get the two piece showing it to Nick, he smiled and looked at me "go try it on I know you will look h o t" I giggled a bit and we went to the dressing room, there was 8 stalls and I went to the first one. I close the door and Nick waiting for me outside the door. I look at the full mirror that was in the side. I started taking off my shoes and my clothes but when I did i looked at myself into the mirror remembering what happened this morning as I was starting to get nervous I take the two piece and put it on.
Now looking at myself...
I look so disgusting
The colors are pretty but it doesn't go well with my body my marks are showing, my body shape everything...
My eyes now threading to spill tears, I couldn't handled it anymore. I started sobbing sitting down at the little chair that was in the stall, covering my body with my arms.
Nick's POV:
I was on my phone waiting for y/n, until I heard crying noises and it was coming from the first stall
Where y/n was in
I started knocking on the door "Y/n open the door are you ok?" I said but the handle was not locked so I opened it "can I come in?" I hear her trying to muffle her sobs. I come in and locked the door. "Hey what happened? Why are you crying?" I raised her chin
Her eyes red and full with tears still coming out. "I-I'm sorry" she said closing her eyes as tears come out. I bent down to look at her "for what baby? What happened?" "That you have to look at me like this I'm c-clearly not pretty f-for you...
What? you thought
I look like this full with marks and I'm not in shape for y-you to l-love me"
I was in shock
Why does y/n think that?
"Why do you think that y/n?"
"Because you will f-find it weird that I'm gonna go to the beach with a long t shirt and shorts not looking like the other girls" she said stuttering
"I w-want to look pretty for you, but instead I have in-insecurities I'm not in a good body shape and look disgusting like this"
I always hated seeing her cry like this
It would make me cry too
"Y/n, Look I love you so much, I don't care about your looks, I love you just the way you are. You are perfect, amazing, beautiful, funny, kind, supportive a lot of amazing words I would describe you. It's ok to feel insecure everyone has a insecurity even me, you're not alone I will never leave you just because you have insecurities, your insecurities are beautiful to me."
She looked up at me her eyes still red and puffy, sniffing and still crying.
"I had a bit of confidence to wear this but I guess I don't. I was planning on maybe not going because of that"
"Baby it's ok, no body will find it weird"
I gave her a smile and decided to do something that will maybe make her smile a bit
I started pinching her cheeks
"Look you look so cute like this, I can always pinch your cheeks or you can pinch mine"
We make eye contact and she smiles a bit with a bit of light red spread throughout her cheeks
I decided to take off my shirt. She's looks at me surprised. " N-Nick?" I quickly wrap my arms around her waist. "I took off my shirt because I didn't want you to feel like you were alone in this"
"You know I love everything about you, you're perfect in every way shape and form. Don't ever feel embarrassed about your body I know it takes time to accept your body and that is totally fine with me. You can always tell me how you feel and what's bothering you, your feelings are always valid for me" I look at her with a smile, I see that she starts crying even more and hugs me.
I hug her tight and I start giving her kisses all over her face and went down to kiss her stomach showing her how much I love her and her body.
"Thank you Nick" she said with a smile and blushing
"No problem love you know I'm always here for you no matter what"
"I think I will not take the bikini I will feel super uncomfortable and I don't wanna feel like that during our day of all of us hanging out"
"Ok love you can always wear whatever makes you comfortable ok?"
"Yea" she said with a smile on her face. " I will leave and wait for you outside the door so that you can change ok?" "Ok Nick" I was about to open the door until she quickly hugged me "Thank you Nick for loving me like this" I look at her and gave her a kiss on top of her head. I gave her a smile, my face heating up a bit for what she did.
I'm happy that she's smiling...
Y/n's POV:
I'm relieved that he loved me for who I am, I break the hug smiling and blushing at him. "I'm gonna wait for you outside ok?" "Ok" he opens the door and closes it. It took me 5 minutes to change and got out of the stall I was in. Nick was waiting for me outside the stall. "You ready?" "Yea I think I will leave the bikini here I don't think I will wear it and it would be a waste of money" I said looking up to him. "Whatever makes you comfortable ok?" He said as he kissed my forehead. I smile and leave the bikini where it was. We got out of the store and saw that dream and George were waiting for us.
"Sorry for taking forever I had a... issue?" I said
"What happened? Why are your eyes red and puffy?" Dream said "Did Nick do something to you?" George said as he looked at Nick with a concern look. "No no no well I uh... uh it was I-"
"Y/n had something to talk about with me so it's private, I don't know if y/n is comfortable talking about it with you guys..." he said looking at me. "Oh I... please don't get mad at me but I was planning on not going to the beach with you guys because I didn't know weather or not to wear a bikini because I was planning on to wear a long t shirt with some shorts but I didn't want to look weird and I have insecurities so a lot was stressing me out"
They both look at me and hugged me "it's ok y/n we understand but that can't stop you from going with us, it's not weird you can wear whatever makes you comfortable ok?" Dream and George were looking at me "yea y/n dream does have a point we love you for who you are ok?" I hugged them back "thank you guys I am going Nick and you guys made me so much feel better" we broke the hug, "so we go back home?" Dream said as everyone said yes. We went back to the car Nick driving us back home
I'm really lucky to have dream George and specially Nick who's always there for me no matter what...
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A/n: For the people that feel embarrassed about their body, don't. Just know that it's ok to have marks, rolls, scars and more know that they are beautiful and will make you stronger! Everyone has a insecurity, so your not alone I struggle with a lot of insecurities, I am over weight and I have a lot of stretch marks in my arms and stomach, it takes time to love yourself and gain confidence. small, medium and large body's are perfect, you're still a bad bitch and nobody can't stop you for being a bad bitch. I love you so much don't you ever change how you look or hurt yourself because again YOU ARE PERFECT! Again it takes time to love yourself so don't force yourself on putting clothes that will make you uncomfortable. I love you, if you ever feel down or need someone to talk to my dms are always open!