| TRIGGER WARNING |
-SAGE-
" Sage."
" Leave me alone." I mumble cuddling to my teddy.
" Sage." Sabrina mumbles.
" Go and select jewelry for your engagement Sabrina. Stop pestering me." I mumble shifting away from her.
Enrique looks up at us with a frown before he goes back to selecting the rings. Everyone was sitting in the living room deciding the rings for their engagement, tomorrow except Shawn who is too upset to participate in any of this right now.
" Please listen to me Sage." she whispers.
" Leave me alone Sabrina. Go and select a ring for your fiance. Leave me alone." I snap at her.
" Sage." she whispers.
" Leave me alone means leave me alone Sabrina." I grumbled.
" Enough Sage." Sabrina yells as she stands up glaring at me.
" I'm trying so hard to talk to you but you're just doing a great job being a stubborn b*tch." she bellows.
" Then don't talk to me." I yell looking down at my teddy.
" You're jealous, right ? You're ignoring me because you're jealous that I'm marrying Enrique now." Sabrina growls.
" No." I mutter.
" Leave her alone, Sabrina." Elliot snaps.
'' Why is she doing this, Elliot ? Why does she have to be so childish and stubborn in all situations ? Can't she see that Enrique is marrying me because she isn't capable of him anymore and it isn't something she should be jealous of ?" Sabrina yells pulling her hair in frustration.
She's right, you're not capable of anyone, Sage.
" Shut up Sabrina. Just leave her alone and she'll be fine." Elliot growls.
" All we do is fight and fight and fight all the damn time." Ethan laughs.
" Listen Sage, I never wanted anything bad for you." Sabrina mumbles softly.
" But you need to move on from alot of things in life. You need to stop being jealous of me now and move on from Enrique." She says.
Move on ? Move on from the man I've loved from the moment I knew what love was ? Move on from the man, I worshipped for years ? Move on from the man, I gave my everything to ?
" You have your whole life ahead, Sage. Stop holding onto things and wasting time. Its been two years, get over it. Get over Enrique, get over your broken relationships, get over that death and get over that rape." she snaps.
" It was just a damn rape, Sage. Get over it. How long will you keep on dragging it ?" she boomed.
" Enough." I scream.
Sabrina stumbles back with wide eyes as realization of her own words dawn upon her. She looks down at me with tears but the damage was already done.
I suddenly felt too suffocated in the room, tears were blurring my vision as flashbacks began flashing into my eyes.
I clutch onto my teddy tightly as I forced my wobbly legs to walk out of the room.
" Sage." Sabrina touches my shoulder but I push her away.
She let's out a scream landing on the floor, hitting her head against the edge of the coffee table.
" It wasn't just a damn rape. Yes, it didn't kill me Sabrina but I felt something break inside me that day, that something which can never be repaired." I scream at her.
Immediately, my dad storms up to me and plants a harsh slap on my cheek. Enrique picks Sabrina up, carefully like she is a fragile doll and begins inspecting her injury.
Why Enrique ? Why can't you see my wounds ? Why can't you hold me in your arms and comfort me ? Am I that dirty now that you don't even have sympathy for me ? Am I really that horrible ?
I sob on the floor, my mind felt chaotic, my body felt numb as their laughs filled in my ears. I sob hugging myself as little pieces of the past played in front of my eyes.
" Stop." I sob.
My dad pulls me up by my hair only to push me back on the floor. My wobbly legs couldn't even help me in any way.
" Uncle, stop it." Elliot growls.
" Stay out of it, Elliot." Dad growls.
" How dare you push my daughter, you little filth ?" he screams kicking me.
" I'M YOUR DAUGHTER TOO." I scream only to receive another kick.
" Enough, please uncle." Enrique says.
'' She injured your fiance and this is what you're saying ?" Lopez, his mother screeches.
" She didn't do it deliberately." Josephine mumbles.
" No one asked you." Lopez snaps.
" Let me talk to her." Enrique says.
Dad nods stepping back. I wince as Enrique holds my shoulders in a tight grip and pulls me up.
" Let go." I sob as he wraps his arm around my waist pulling my body flush to his.
" Listen here, Sage." he leans in whispering.
I could feel his lips touching my earlobe and his warm breathe against my neck but it all only added up to my anxiety.
" Have you ever looked at your face, even the fuckers on the street won't fuck you for free so be grateful that you've got the taste of my cock. Now if you ever raise your hand on my fiance again, I'll personally go and drop you to a whorehouse because that's where, a trash like you belongs." he whispers.
I stared up at his merciless, grey orbs. Everything felt silent and numb with only his words repeating in my head.
He pushes me away, glaring at me. I looked around, there was a ringing sound in my ears which wasn't stopping. Everyone stared at me with sadness covering their features but none of them looked familiar. It felt like I was standing in the middle of no where with strangers surrounding me.
With shaky legs, I turned around and slowly walked up to my room, not turning back even once. No one even said a word to stop me.
I never walked away on my own, no one really stopped me from leaving.
Enrique's words kept repeating in my ears like a broken tape. My limps felt sore , my eyes felt heavy, my mind felt chaotic as always by the time I reached my room.
Closing the door behind, I run to the bathroom getting in the tub full of water. I dipped my head in the water, hoping his words will go away but they didnt. They only grew louder and louder and louder and louder and louder and louder . . .
" STOP."
" STOP."
" Go away." I scream hitting my hands in the water.
" Go away from me." I scream my lungs out, pulling my hair.
' Its just a damn rape.'
' Get over it.'
' You're just an attention seeker.'
' Even f*ckers on the street won't f*ck you for free.'
" Leave me alone, please." I sob hugging myself tightly.
My body shook with the internal pain I was bearing, my heart was shattering into pieces. One by one, little pieces of past began playing in front of me.
" Stay away." I scream pulling my knees to my chest.
I tried to stand up but my legs were bound. A dirty sock was stuffed into my mouth muffling my screams.
I squirmed trying to get away when the man on top of me gave me a harsh back hand slap. My jaw throbbed in pain, but it was nothing in front of the pain in my abdomen.
" You've got the nicest set of tits I've ever seen." he laughs punching my chest as my insides shook.
I choked onto the sock trying to recover from the punch and breath in air as he laughed at my pathetic attempts.
" STOP." I scream as I felt painful throbbing in my head.
I tried to get out of the tub but my hands slipped resulting me to fall back in it.
Sobs wrecked my body as I shaved my legs with shaky hands. The blunt blade of the razor left tons of cuts on my legs, I couldn't name that one part of my body which wasn't experiencing excruciating pain right now.
The old, battered door was slammed open as a man walked in smirking at me.
" You were given five minutes only, and you haven't even done shaving yet." he growls.
I pulled my legs up to my chest feeling his eyes all over me, the only thing I wanted to do right now was to close my eyes and sleep and never open them again.
" Anyway, since you've been a bad girl, not listening to orders, you'll have to receive a punishment." he smirks pushing his pants down.
My eyes widened in fear as I tried to scramble out of the tub with my bruised body only to slip and fall back in.
I cried as my back hit the hard surface but the man gave me no time to recover, all he knew was to get on top of me and get the pleasure he was craving for.
I howl in pain pulling myself out of the tub. I crawl into the corner of the room and hide my face in my knees, rocking myself back and forth.
" Please stop." I whisper.
The man on top of me looked older than my father, his bad breath hit my face, making me cringe in pain and disgust.
" I've paid them twenty bucks for twenty minutes so you better make it worth, you slut." he groans in pleasure throwing his head back.
" I'm not a slut." I whisper.
'' I'm not a slut."
'' I'm not a slut."
" I'm not a slut."
" I'm not a slut." I scream hitting my hands on the floor.
He pushed me against the back seat of the car and got behind me. I tried to kick him but my legs couldn't move due to the less space in the car.
He tore my wedding gown near my waist as my sobs got louder and louder. My wrists were aching from the prickly rope they were bound with.
The sound of the zipper opening had me trembling in fear. I sobbed trying to move but he only pushed his chest against my back, gripping my breasts in a tight grip.
" Please . . . don't . . . I'm just . . . just eighteen and . . . its my wedding in . . . two days." I whisper in hopes that his humanity will wake up.
" Not anymore, no one will want to marry a sl*t." he chuckled.
" No. No. No." I scream shaking my head like a maniac as I felt him position himself against me.
I screamed my lungs out as he rammed into me, placing his hand over my mouth muffling my screams. He pulled my head back, resting it on his chest as he moved inside me.
I tried to wriggle between him and the seat, feeling it impossible to breath. The pain was
clouding my vision, my muffled sobs jumbled up with his pleasurable moans.
Bile rose up my throat as he quickened up his pace, hitting my insides painfully and rocking the car back and forth.
I gasp as the pain returns. The monsters return. They all laughed at me as they slowly took steps closer towards me.
" Stay away." I scream but they all laughed down at me. They kept coming closer as my throat constricted in fear, I felt it difficult to breath and my shaky legs denied to work.
A razor blade lying on the floor catches my eye. I stare at it in awe before slowly picking it up. Such a tiny, small thing and what wonders it can do.
The monsters kept laughing but they suddenly came to a stop when I showed them the razor.
I placed the razor on my wrist, feeling the sharp blade scrap against my soft flesh.
" No." they screamed.
I smiled , they knew they won't be able to touch me if I did this and thats exactly what I wanted.
I slashed my skin open and watched blood flowing out of it in awe. A smile came on my face, as the monsters screamed in agony as each of them slowly disappeared as my blood drained out of my body.
I smile falling back on the floor. I'm free! I'm finally free of these monsters. The pain was raw and excruciating but the hope that I won't ever wake up gave me tolerance.
I wanna go to my mumma now. Place my head on her lap and sleep peacefully. I'm tired of fighting.
I fight my monsters. I fight myself. I fight the darkness. I fight the noises. I fight the nightmares. I fight the pain. I fight the agony and yet . . . they call me weak.
^-^
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