I woke up this morning before Rhett did, I brought my knees up to my bare chest while sitting up next to his sleeping body. I watched him peacefully inhale and exhale, guilt was roaming my mind. He's an amazing guy and all I asked for, I love him but it's not same type of love I share for Faust maybe it could be if I allow myself.
I made love to him last night using my body as an apology, he just didn't know what I was apologizing for not even I do.
Rhett shifted around in bed, his soft eyes met mine. His hands softly skimmed over my cheek like he was worshiping every detail about me, a little smile appeared against my lips.
"Are you thinking about it?" His sleepily voice asked.
Did he know?
"What?" I whispered, my voice came out breathless.
"The court hearing for Jakob."
I completely forgot about that, I have to face my rapist all over again hoping to continue his long sentence. I nodded my head while turning to look away but he stopped me gently, his tilted my chin sideways getting a better look at my face.
"He'll stay in prison, I promise you." He rubs his sleepy eyes as I nod while sniffing. "Come here."
He opens his blanket for me, I smiled softly while crawling inside his blanket with him. He exhaled against my cheek causing his cold breath to brush against it, I stared at him.
I ran my finger across his eyebrow, he smiled gently. I wanted so hard to love him like he deserves to be loved, maybe I can in the future and that's good enough for me. I had a different type of love for Rhett, I love him just not like how I'm suppose to love him as his fiancée. After cuddling for a bit, Rhett had to start getting ready for work so did I.
I was going to face Faust, I needed him to stay away from me and Rhett. It was raining and cold outside so I decided to dress in a long black coat paired with my leather black boots. I said bye to my mom and kissed Rhett goodbye before heading towards my car, I turned my engine on.
Driving was nerve wrecking, I had a plan. I was going march in there and warn him about leaving my fiancé and I alone and turn down the job opportunity than walk out leaving him behind forever.
I pulled into the parking lot and braided my long black hair before getting down. I didn't stop at the front desk, I walked all the way down the hallway to his office and I didn't knock either I just entered. Faust was reading the newspaper without glancing up at who barged inside his office.
"How dare you call my fiancé." I growled, angrily. I was fuming and frustrated, I wanted to kick him in the balls.
"You weren't answering, employee." He simply says without looking at me.
"I'm not your employee, I'm nothing to you." I shouted.
I closed the door behind me, I didn't want to cause a big scene for everyone to hear.
"Stay away from my fiancé, Faust." I told him with such a warning tone, he lowered the newspaper before fixing his tie.
"Are you afraid that he might find out you had an affair with a married man?" He smirks, wickedly.
I wanted to slap that smug look off his face, it was infuriating at how blunt he was.
"I didn't even know you were married, you tricked me." I argued.
"Than why haven't you told him about me, Adora." He quickly storms over to me, I coward away, afraid he might kiss me because I know very well that this time I won't be able to stop.
He roughly grabbed my elbow yanking me closer to his chest. "That's the difference between him and I, I'd never judge you because I love you for who you are, flaws and all."
Did he just say he loves me?
My nose gently touched his, my cool breath flushed against his cheeks. My brows scrunched up, my lips parted slightly as my eyes roamed around his strong features for some sort of answer.
"I really can't explain it but I love you without even trying too."
My heart was pounding so hard against my chest, my cheeks became flushed.
"I can't do this to Rhett, to myself." I said. "Not again."
My hands laid flat against his chest trying to put some distance between us, he runs his hand over his faded beard.
"I should go." I said.
Something was eating me from the inside, I couldn't exactly explain what it was. I made a strong turn, twisting the door knob until his voice halted my footsteps.
"You still have the job if you want it." His voice came out husky, there was no arguing with his sentence.
I glanced back at him, we both stared at each other for a couple seconds as I nodded. I opened the door and walked out, I walked as fast as I could to my car. I didn't sit in my car to think, instead I turned the engine on and drove off. I passed by many houses, the roads seemed to be completely empty and the sky was filled with gray clouds.
I was doing this to ensure a secure future, a future where I wouldn't have to go through all this suffering and pain.
Faust never fought for me, is what I'm telling myself which is true.
I arrived home with a huge headache, I dropped my purse and keys off at the entrance. My dad was sitting in the living room watching tv, he was laughing at whatever he was watching. I took off my boots before walking over the carpet to my dad, he spotted me and lifted his blanket up. I smiled as I cuddled in to his warm arms, he inhaled loudly and kissed my forehead.
"How did it go with Faust?" My dad asked.
"Rhett is a good man." I said, trying to change the topic.
My dad saw right through me, he calls bullshit when he sees it.
"But he's not the one for you because you love someone entirely different."
My face pressed against his arm, my head softly nodded.
"I love Rhett, I swear I do but-"
"You love Faust more." He finishes my sentence.
I nodded.
"Sweetie, you need to call off the wedding. You don't want to do this, you don't want to end up like your mother and I."
"I can't, dad. Rhett has been so good to me and Faust, well all he's done is hurt me." I said.
"Love isn't abou-"
My dad's sentence was cut off short when the front door opened, Rhett walked in with flowers laced through his hand and in his other hand he was holding his briefcase. He was kicking off his shoes when he realized I was in the living room, he brought the flowers forward with a sweet smile.
He remembered my favorite flowers, orange poppies.
A grateful smile appeared on my lips, I tossed the blanket off of me and stormed over to him. He quickly wrapped his arms around me, I buried my head inside his neck trying to seek some comfort. He seemed taken back and filled with worried, he brushed back my hair softly.
"Rough day?" He asked.
"It's always rough without you being there." I whispered.
He nods his head swiftly before pulling back a little, he handed me the bouquet of flowers. I brought them to my nose, inhaling the fresh smell of newly blossomed poppies.
"I have really, really good news." He reveals.
"I should go back home to Mia now." My dad said, he kisses me goodnight and shakes Rhett's hand before grabbing his car keys and heading out the door.
Rhett led me back to the couch, I placed my flowers on my lap waiting for the good news.
"I closed the deal on the house, we get to move in at the end of the week." He shouts, excitedly.
Fear, fear was all I felt. I wanted to scream and cry but instead I trapped my feelings inside and smiled. He brought me in for a hug, dragging me to saddle his lap.
"Isn't that good news?" He lowered his eyes catching my stare.
"It's great news, Rhett." I whispered.
"How was work?"
"Amazing." I lied, now I definitely need to take the job.
What the fuck was I going to do? I'm going to stay with him until death do us part.
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