BE MYSELF
chapter 17
– so why do i try
imessages
may 20th 2020
third person
"We need to talk. Now," jonah said, looking at jack.
"What? Why?" jack asked.
"Just sit down," jonah said pointing at the couch.
jack hesitantly sat down on the couch as jonah sat down in the chair in front of him.
"So, what's up?" jack asked, slightly nervous where this conversation was leading.
"Savannah," jonah said, bluntly.
"What about her?" jack furrowed his eyebrows.
"So you obviously like her, right?" jonah questioned.
"Well duh, I thought we already established this?" jack said, sounding more like a question.
"Do you plan on asking her out, or to be your girlfriend or whatever?" jonah asked.
"I don't know, I haven't really thought about that," jack shrugged. "But probably not, I don't want to rush things."
"Well good. Don't think about it," jonah said.
"What?" jack raised his eyebrows.
"Don't think about asking her out and don't think about asking her to be your girlfriend," jonah said.
"Why?" jack asked, starting to get mad.
"I'm pretty sure I get to choose who I date," jack said, emphasizing the 'i'. "Not you."
"I just don't think it's a good idea for you to date her," jonah said.
"Why the fuck not? Last time I checked, you weren't my mom," jack said, now furious.
"I'm twenty one, I'm responsible for my own decisions," jack continued.
"And I'll date Savannah if I want too," he added.
"Jack, do you really think you're in the right mental space to be dating anyone?" jonah asked.
"Isn't that for me to decide?" jack asked.
"Yes, but I don't want you getting hurt. Or hurting Savannah," jonah said.
"You and me both know damn well I would never, ever do anything to hurt her," jack said.
"Okay, yeah, but I also don't want you getting distracted," jonah said. "We need to work on the album and focus on ourselves."
"We have all the time in the world to work on the album, me dating Savannah wouldn't change that," jack said. "She knows I'm busy and we would work it out. Plus she has at least three interviews every week so we both already know we wouldn't be able to talk to each other that much. Which is okay, and healthy."
"So I don't know what has gotten into you, but if I want to date Savannah, I will. And there's no one in the world that can stop me," jack said, before storming off to his room.
he didn't know what had gotten into jonah. they have always been nothing but supportive for each other. with everything. girlfriends, jack having a kid, everything.
jack decided to take his mind off of it and go for a swim.
he changed into his swim trunks, and went downstairs, completely ignoring jonah, who was know sitting at their kitchen island on a bar stool, holding a cup of coffee.
jack slide open the back door, placing his towel and phone on a lounge chair, before jumping in the pool.
after about twenty minutes, jacks phone started ringing.
at first he wanted to ignore it, until he got a few texts. he decided to get out and see who it was, smiling when he saw it was savannah.
he read the texts out loud to himself, "Hey. Call me back when you can. Only if you want of course, no rush."
"Obviously I'll want too," he smiled to himself, placing his self on the chair, pulling up his contacts.
"Oh wow, that was quick," savannah said as the call connected.
"I would've answered right away, but I was in the pool," jack chuckled.
"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt your swim," savannah said, slightly frowning.
"No it's okay, I'm glad you called," jack said, smiling.
savannah tried to hide the huge grin that was plastered on her face, although jack saw it right away.
"Hey Jack, Gabbie's here," corbyn said, stepping out of the back door before heading back inside.
"Gabbie? Who's that?" savannah asked curiously.
"She's uhh, my... ex," jack said hesitantly.
"Oh," savannah said.
she obviously liked jack and she knew jack liked her, and jack didn't seem like that type of person. but she couldn't help but frown at the thought of jack's ex being at his house.
she furrowed her eyebrows as she thought about it more. jack didn't seem like that type of person.
savannah was hurt and confused but she didn't want jack to see that.
"It's not like that," jack said, seeing the hurt in savannah's eyes.
savannah raised her eyebrow and looked back at her phone.
"We're completely over each other and we're on good terms," jack explained.
"So then why is she at your house?" savannah said, completely regretting the way she said it.
"Well, you see, the thing is," jack said.
savannah raised her eyebrow again, waiting for his response.
"I sort of have a daughter, and Gabbie's the mom, but since we broke up, we obviously don't live with each other so she comes over often," jack explained.
savannah immediately regretted ever over thinking, and thinking jack was that type of person.
"I am so sorry Jack, I just immediately thought of the worse," savannah said.
"No, it's okay, I understand how it seems," jack said.
"So, what's her name? And how old is she?" savannah asked.
"Lavender, she just turned two last month," jack smiled.
"Can I see her, or meet her or whatever?" savannah asked.
"Yeah, of course! Gabbie is coming over on Zach's birthday," jack said.
"I can't wait," savannah smiled.
"I should probably go, it's been a while since I've seen her," jack said.
"Oh yeah, of course. Spend all the time you have with her," savannah smiled.
"Thank you," jack smiled back.
"Bye Jack," savannah said.
"Bye Savannah," jack said, before ending the call.
jack grabbed his towel before heading back inside his house, immediately being attacked by lavender, who wrapped her arms around his legs.
jack smiled and bent down, picking her up, giving her a huge kiss on her forehead.
"Hi Lavy," he said, tickling her stomach.
lavender let out a giggle making jack smile even bigger.
after several hours, gabbie and lav left, leaving jack and jonah together.
alone.
jonah was standing at the kitchen island while jack was cleaning lav's toys up in the living room.
jonah watched jack as he did so, earning a glance from jack once in a while.
"We still on for game night?" corbyn asked walking down the stairs with zach and daniel trailing behind him.
corbyn went over to the game console, getting fortnite ready.
jonah sat on the floor, next to corbyn, while daniel and zach sat on the couch.
jack hesitantly sat in the chair, not wanting to be in the same room as jonah.
after a few games jack started to forget his conversation with jonah earlier in the day, happy that he was spending time with his best friends.
"I'm bored, wanna play truth or dare or something?" corbyn asked, putting the controllers to the side.
"Sure," daniel shrugged.
"I'll start," zach said. "Corbyn, truth or dare?"
"Dare," corbyn said, with no hesitation.
"I dare you to call Christina and say you're breaking up with her to be with Daniel," zach smirked.
corbyn laughed while pulling out his phone, calling her.
"Hey babe, what's up?" she asked right away.
"Uh, we need to talk," corbyn said.
"Right now? I'm with my friends," christina said.
"Yes. Right now," corbyn said.
"Okay, what is it?" christina asked, slightly confused.
"So you know how the fans like to ship me and Daniel or whatever, like Dorbyn?" corbyn asked.
"Uhh, yeah. Why?" christina asked.
"Well, the rumors are true. And we need to break up," corbyn said, trying not to laugh, the others also holding in their giggles.
"What?" christina asked, super confused now, and also slightly worried.
"I'm breaking up with you. For Daniel," corbyn said, now in between giggles.
it was silent for a few seconds until there were laughs coming from multiple people on christina's end.
"Let me guess, this was Zach's idea?" christina chuckled.
"Yup," zach said.
"Okay bye, gotta go," corbyn said before hanging up.
zach bursted into laughter, trying hard to not fall off the couch. though he failed, falling onto corbyn, making everyone laugh even harder.
after everyone calmed down a bit they decided to continue the game.
"Okay so, Daniel, truth or dare?" corbyn asked.
"Hmm, truth," daniel said.
"Hmm okay, would you date Franny if you had the chance?" corbyn asked.
"I don't know. Maybe," daniel shrugged.
"Okay, Jack, truth or dare?" daniel asked.
"Dare," jack said.
"Okay, I dare you to call the most recent person you called on a date," daniel said.
jack pulled his phone out, going to his call app.
he savannah's name and the memories of his and jonah's conversation flooded into his brain.
"I don't know if I can do that, I might have to ask Jonah first," jack said, annoyed.
"What? Why?" daniel asked.
"Who is it?" jonah asked.
"Who do you think?" jack asked, glaring at jonah.
he just shrugged, confused.
"Did you forget about our conversation earlier of you telling me not to date Savannah," jack said.
all of a sudden, tension filled the room.
"Wait, what?" corbyn asked confused.
"Why would you say that?" zach asked.
"That's a real dick move, Jonah," daniel said.
"You have no room to talk, Daniel. Didn't you literally admit to liking her like yesterday?" jonah snapped.
"Even if I do like her, doesn't mean I'm gonna tell my band mate, my best friend, who he can and can't date. I'd be more than thrilled if they dated because I know that they would both be happy," daniel said.
"Why would you even say that, Jonah?" zach asked again.
"Because I don't want Jack getting distracted," jonah muttered.
"He's twenty one, he knows how to not get distracted," corbyn said.
by now, everyones mood has completely changed.
just minutes ago they were all cracking up having fun. enjoying each other's company.
and now there was a sharp tension in the air and everyone, even himself, was disappointed in jonah.
jack shook his head and stood up, picking his phone up from the coffee table.
he walked over to where his shoes were and slipped them on before grabbing his keys and wallet, opening the front door.
"Where are you going?" corbyn asked.
"Wherever that douchebag isn't," jack said, referring to jonah, before walking outside, slamming the door behind him.
he got in his car and started driving. he didn't know where, he just knew he had to get away.
after about ten minutes he found himself in an unfamiliar area, though he somehow knew who's house he was in front of.
he read the numbers on the front of the house before opening his message app, going to savannah's contact.
he scrolled up a bit until he found when she sent her address. he read the numbers on his phone then he looked up at the house.
he somehow managed to go to savannah's house.
he was confused because he'd never been there before.
sure he had her address, but he's never looked at the route, and he hadn't taken the time to go over there.
he sighed as he stared out his window.
he noticed a light shining through one of the windows on the second floor. he figured it was savannah's room.
after a few moments he sighed and hesitantly unlocked his car, opening the door.
he walked up to the front door and rang the doorbell, immediately regretting it.
after a few seconds he heard the sound of the door being unlocked, before it opened, revealing savannah.
"Jack? What are you doing here? It's almost one in the morning," savannah said.
jack hadn't even realized it was so late, which only made his regret grow more.
"I uhh- me and Jonah got in a fight and I just needed to get out. And somehow I ended up here..." jack trailed off, realizing how pathetic it sounded.
savannah's eyes widened at the thought of them getting into a fight. "Are you okay?"
"What do you mean?" jack asked.
"Like did he hurt you or anything?" savannah asked.
"Oh, no no, not at all, it wasn't physical," jack said.
"Ohh, okay. Well, I'm sorry to here that," savannah frowned.
"It's okay, it happens. Living with four guys isn't all sunshine and rainbows. Even if they happen to be your band mates and best friends," jack said.
"Well, do you want to come in? I went to the store earlier and got a bunch of ingredients for cookies," savannah said.
"Sure, that sounds like fun," jack smiled.
"Cool," savannah said, opening the door completely so jack could walk in.
"Conner isn't here but he might be coming. I don't know, he's with his friends," savannah shrugged.
"Isn't he your brother?" jack asked, placing his shoes by the front door.
"Yeah," savannah said, opening the music app on her phone.
"So you just let him leave and you have no clue where he is?" jack asked.
"Well for one, he's almost seventeen and he's very responsible, and for two his friend lives down the street but I said they could go skate around the city or something," savannah explained, walking into the kitchen.
"Oh, I'm sorry if I sounded rude or whatever," jack apologized, following her.
"No, it's okay. I get it. I didn't really word it that well," savannah said.
savannah pressed play on her music and started to get the ingredients ready.
"So, what kind of cookies are we making?" jack asked.
"Well, chocolate chip obviously, and m and m's, my favorite," savannah smiled.
"Sounds good," jack said.
"Hey, you have What Am I on your music?" jack asked, mixing the chocolate chip batter.
"Duh, I have all of your music," savannah said pouring m and m's into her batter.
"Oh, wow," jack smiled widely.
"What?" savannah asked.
"I don't know," jack shrugged. "I guess I just didn't expect you to have our music."
"Well duh, y'all are talented as heck," savannah said.
jack chuckled, making savannah smile widely.
"Don't tell anyone, but I have the Julie and The Phantoms soundtrack on my music," jack slightly whispered, making savannah laugh.
"What's your favorite song?" savannah asked.
"No pressure," she winked.
"I'd have to say Edge of Great but All Eyes On Me is a bop not gonna lie," jack said.
savannah smiled, playing edge of great.
*
"These are so good," savannah said, biting into her fifth cookie.
"They really are. We did a good job," jack said, wrapping cling wrap around a paper plate.
"Wanna watch a movie?" savannah asked, doing the same.
"Sure," jack said, going to the living room.
savannah finished cleaning up and made a bag of popcorn before grabbing a plate of cookies and two water bottles.
"What should we watch?" savannah asked sitting down on the couch next to jack.
"I was thinking Toy Story maybe?" jack questioned.
"Sure," savannah said, going to it and pressing play.
by the end of the movie, savannah had fallen asleep, resting her head on jack's shoulder.
he slowly grabbed the remote, making sure not to wake her up, turning the tv off.
he grabbed a pillow and put it under her head and slowly got up before covering her with a blanket.
he quietly cleaned up the plates and bowls before going back to the living room, sitting in the chair.
he slid his phone out of his pocket and scrolled through instagram until savannah woke up or until he fell asleep.
after about a half hour, she started moving around a bit, until she eventually opened her eyes.
she looked around and her eyes met jacks.
"Oh, hey, you're still here?" she asked sleepily.
"Yeah, I wanted to say bye before I just left out of no where, plus I thought I'd keep you company," jack shrugged.
savannah smiled and nodded. "What time is it?"
"Uh, about five thirty," jack said, looking down at his phone.
"Oh jeez. You can go home now if you'd like," savannah said.
"You sure?" jack questioned.
"Yeah, you need some sleep," savannah said sitting up.
"Okay then," jack said getting up.
he walked to the front door and slid his shoes on before turning around to meet savannah's eyes.
"I had a lot of fun," she smiled.
"Me too," jack smiled back.
"We should definitely hang out more," savannah said.
"Definitely," jack nodded.
"Okay bye, Jack."
"Bye, Sav. I'll text you later."
"Sounds good," savannah smiled again.
jack smiled down at her and stared into her big brown eyes that he could quickly get lost in.
savannah continued to look up at him, admiring his eyes as well.
jack stepped a bit closer, quickly glancing down at her lips.
today was the first time he realized how much he liked her.
all he wanted to do was grab her face and smash their lips together but he didn't want to rush anything, and potentially ruin a perfectly good friendship, which he hopped could be more some day.
savannah too stepped closer, wanting the same thing jack wanted, but also didn't want to ruin anything.
jack eventually looked away, stepping back, not wanting to do anything he would later regret.
he cleared his throat and looked back at savannah.
"You should probably get going, you look pretty tired," savannah said.
"Uh, yeah," jack nodded.
he turned around and opened the front door, before turning around to say goodbye one last time.
"Bye Jack," savannah smiled.
jack walked outside, shutting the door behind him, before sighing.
he wanted to kiss her.
so bad.
he wanted to turn around again and go back, but he knew he shouldn't.
he shook his thoughts away and got into his car, sighing one more time before driving home.
-
a/n
y'all i'm-
i'm so sorry i took so long to update
um anyway, i hope this was worth the wait bc i actually kind of like this
also the * things signifies a time skip lol
also
i wanted to clear smth up even tho no one has asked about it
but
this story obviously takes place in 2020 during the beginning of the pandemic and lockdown and stuff (in america mainly bc ik the lockdown and stuff started at different times in different countries) but all of the characters are how old they are now
so basically everything in real life that's happening now, is happening in 2020
like for example, julie and the phantoms is out in the story even tho irl it wasn't out yet
the only thing that's different is that the boys album (tgtatbo) isn't out yet
idk when it's gonna come out in the story but for now it's not out lol
anyway i feel like i didn't explain that well and idek if i had to explain it but whatever
ok anyway bye ily and i hope you're doing good :)