-unedited-
Chapter 24:
Suddenly I look forward to seeing him every end of the week, when his sheets need changing or his laundry done.
There are times when he comes to look for me, I can only insist that he doesn't but at the end he does what he wants and he wants to see me.
"It feels like its been too long," he'd say as he smiles at me, following me as I did my job or explored the rooms in case any assistance was needed in any of them.
"We could be seen," I tell him in a warning tone though I honestly enjoyed him with me, "you could be seen."
"And I'd say I had business to attend in the broom closet."
I tried not smile but failed.
"Is it only this hall that you do?" He asked, walking by my side as I contiued down the corridor.
"Sometime when its too busy in the kitchen I do multiple wings," I answered simply, "on the most occupied days I help attend the gardens or polish the jewelry."
I'll never forget the what seemed like hours long lecture Mariah gave me on treated the family jewels with care, and how I'd be killed severely for even thinking on stealing them. I believed her.
"That's a lot for one person..." he said in a hushed, somber tone. I questioned whether he had said it to me or not.
I almost wanted to tell him that it wasn't much at all, that I did everything back at my mothers, but I decided against it. I didn't want it to weigh his mind.
"I'm sure you have just as much to do, being our future ruler and all," I tried taking his mind off me for a change, "what is it that you do?"
"Nothing you don't already know," before I could ask what he meant he continued, "the history of our ruling, taxes, war tactics, but most importantly, knowing the people you rule..."
He looked distant as he explained but mostly upset, I suddenly regret bringing it up. I remembered the rumor that he didn't want to be king, that he tried to escape from even being a prince. All these questions began to rise but I held them back down, I knew this was something he'd speak to me about when he was willing.
He doesn't push me, so I shouldn't push him.
"I'm sorry," my voice comes out in a hushed tone, similar to how his was earlier.
"Oh, no it's fine, Mary," he gave me a reassuring smile, "you didn't do anything wrong, I'm sorry I made you uncomfortable."
I shook my head, "You didn't."
It stays quiet for a moment.
I could no longer hold them down any longer.
"Why did you run away?" I couldn't stop the words from coming out of my mouth. Regret filled withim me as my question began to fill the space between us.
He comes to a halt and I do too. I stare at him, waiting for an answer or any response from him. Fear -no- anxiety filled my stomach along with the regret.
Finally he looks into my eyes and gives me a sad smile.
"There's only so much I can explain," is the only thing he says before Mariah comes around the corner and he leaves before she can see him.
I made him mad, was the only thing I can think of when he was gone, but still I wanted to know.
Why would he leave such a place like this behind?
"Because he can't handle the responsibility, or he just wishes not to," was what Mariah answered when I asked her.
"He can't just resign?" I ask as we scrub the tiles remaining of the floor on the bathroom. Which is a large tiled room with a large tiled bath, meant to hold a hand full of people in it which I did not bring into question.
"He can resign from ruling the same way we can resign of being servants."
I look up at her.
"That's just the way things are," she's a tone or regret in her voice, she sighs heavily and stands, barely being able to keep balance and the still wet floor.
"But really, if he wanted to change the way things were he'd have to be king. If he were kind he could change the law and not have to be king at all," she laughs to herself.
"What's so funny?" I stare as she tries to make her way out of the room without falling, it almost looks like she's learning how to walk again.
"Well, he'd have to become king to not be a king, it's a paradox; just like the entire their entire ruling history." And she's finally able to make it out, leaving just me to figure out what she meant.
~*~
"It's late." his voice catches me by surprise as I finally made my way out of the bath. Mariah having other business to attend to, I was left to finish cleaning it alone, which took longer than what I usually take cleaning.
"Did you wait for me?" I felt my face getting heating up. Did I make him wait?
"Its not a problem, I wanted to see you," he gives me a reassuring smile.
I stayed quiet awhile before a smile crept upon my face.
'Thank you." I told him.
"For you, anything."
~*~
He had lead me outside to where he was certain there'd be noone to spot us when we went. There, we walked around a short while, I admired the flowers and roses he had there, the way the stars looked against the clear night sky.
He told me more about his parents, how they used to teach him the simple things of the country such as the plants, animals, and the weather patterns throughout the seasons.
"'A good king must know the land he owns' is what he'd tell me," his eyes seemed sober at the memory of it. It reminded me of the question I had asked him earlier but I said nothing.
"I think that's amazing, how you know so much about the land," I tried to cheer him up.
"Yes, the land,' he said it under his breath. He probably didn't mean for me to hear, so I pretend I didn't.
The subject changed, he then spoke about the places he'd travelled to and how he loved to see the rest of the world. He kept on and on about his dreams or thoughts, I tried my best not to ruin it, for who knows if he'll ever be this open with me again. The moon reached the peak of the sky, and i began to feel it in my system that i've been up too late, and i remembered that Mariah ordered me to go shopping tomorrow along a few other of the maids.
I let him lead me around before I insisted he go back to where he needed to be but he seemed reluctant. That's when I realized something was wrong.
"What is it?"
"What do you mean?" He tried to smile to hide the sadness in his eyes, but this time I see it.
"There's something bothering you."
"Perhaps there is..." he looked away.
I suddenly had the idea to invite him to come shopping with me but I held the thought back. I almost forgot that he's the Prince.
He can't go shopping where I go and I can't go where he goes.
"Don't worry about me, Mary," he tells me as he sees my worried expression, the smile he gives reaches his eyes this time.
"I won't be at the castle as usual tomorrow," I inform him.
"What, why?" He frowns, making me regret bringing it up.
"I need to go shopping, which might take awhile seeing as I'm unsure of what the castle needs." This time I smile, trying to reassure him, though I most likely don't do it as well as he does.
"Would it be impossible for me to go with you?' He suddenly asks, looking me straight in the eyes as he does.
I blink at him.
Yes. I don't say.
"P-people will see us," I spit out, my voice shaking, reminding him of the compromise we made that day in his room.
He nods seeming disappointed, "Oh, yeah."
I feel disappointed as well, because I don't have the courage -no, that I'm not a person that can be seen with him.
"But I really do want you to!" The words come out of my mouth before I can stop them.
My hands cover my mouth and I look down, feeling the hottest my face has ever been.
Why did I say that? I can barely hear my own thoughts as heart continues to pound loudly.
It's quiet for a while, then I finally build up the courage to look up at him again.
I see that he too is looking away, covering his mouth to hide what looks to be a smile. The heat still lingers on my cheeks.
His eyes finally meet mine again.
"Alright then, I will."
It was hard to fall asleep that night.