You need to sleep. Just close your eyes and sleep.
I can't, there are the visions. They are always there when I close my eyes.
Ignore them.
Then they become my nightmares. And it's worse.
But you need to sleep, Justin.
I need to but I can't.
Sleep, Justin, sleep.
Justin rubbed his eyes as he stood with the whole Institute in the common room, with Alec Lightwood at the top of the stairs as the leader he was born to be. Justin didn't know what this meeting was about, he just knew Alec was about to make an important announcement, his first one as the head of the Institute.
"We have lost seven of our own, but we can't allow a single radical Seelie to define the entire Downworld, any more than we can allow Valentine to define all Shadowhunters." Izzy nudged Justin on the side of his stomach, the redhead boy jolting awake and paying attention once again. "So, to restore unity with our allies, I will be hosting regular cabinet meetings here with the Downworld leaders of New York."
Justin zoned out once again as his body was too tired, and his mind was drained. He didn't know how he was even functioning since he wasn't having any rest and when he did, his dreams were clouded with nightmares.
Justin was brought back to reality when the Shadowhunters dispersed and he was now alone standing there, while his friends were all crowded around Alec. He made his way there halfway through their conversation.
"Yeah, I'm not sure anyone agrees."
Justin wasn't really sure what they were talking about, but he guessed it was about the cabinet Alec had organized.
"All the more reason to do it. How can I help?" Clary smiled at the taller man.
"Actually," Alec looked between them, "I need you, Justin, and Jace for a mission. Going to the Seelie Court." Justin simply nodded. He was not really in the mood to argue with Alec about wanting to stay here and maybe have some decent sleep.
"Where is that?" Clary asked.
"The nearest entrance is in Central Park. But it's in another realm. Where the Seelie Queen lives." Of course the Seelies have royalty, Justin thought.
"I requested an audience with her to discuss Kaelie's crimes. However, she said she'll only meet with Valentine's experiments." Alec sent a look at his partner, finding him rolling his eyes. He knew how much Justin hated being related to Valentine now, but he had to use the Seelie Queen's words.
"That's just the perfect nickname." Justin's voice dripped with sarcasm as he ran a hand through his hair.
"So you think the Seelie Queen is responsible for Kaelie's attacks?" Clary questioned Alec's bold motives.
"That's what I want you to find out."
Jace nodded his head. "That would make sense. Those murders weren't exactly Kaelie's style."
Clary squinted her eyes. She did remember that Jace somehow knew the murderous Seelie. "How did you know Kaelie?"
Jace looked down at her and to the others around him and he gulped. "Bookclub."
"Since when do you read?" Alec pulled a funny face at his boyfriend's question.
Jace sent him a glare in response. "Yeah. Why does everyone find that hard to believe?" Justin sent him a look, asking him if he really wanted the sincere answer to that question.
Before Justin could retort, Alec spoke up. "Look, focus. We need to find out if she's complicit. An entire faction could be turning against us."
"That shouldn't be too hard, right? Seelies can't lie."
"Technically, yes." Justin scoffed. Why are they bringing out technicalities if that is something they said since the beginning. Why can't something just be easy for once? "But after hundreds of years of practice, they can expertly manipulate the truth, and the queen's the master."
"She's very dangerous. The entire realm is. More than one Shadowhunter hasn't made it back." Now that's just great. Izzie's words were not encouraging for Justin, but at this point, he didn't care if he didn't make it back.
"What could go wrong?" Clary sighed. "But we're, uh, Valentine's experiments right? Don't mess with us."
After that, the conversation ended, and Justin caught up with Alec to privately speak with him about this matter. He didn't want to argue, he just wanted to understand why he had to go.
"Hey," he called out, making Alec turn his head to look at him and a smile appeared on his face. "Why the rush?"
"I'm on my way to see Luke, and you," Alec fixed Justin's jacket, "need to get to Central Park so you can see the Seelie Queen."
Justin nodded. "Yeah, about that." Alec furrowed his eyebrows. "I'm not disobeying an order from the Head of the Institute." A smile appeared on his lips as the words escaped his mouth—he was really proud of Alec for this achievement. "Just curious. If you have Clary and Jace, why do you need me to go?"
Alec sighed. He knew Justin had these questions, but he just had the answers the queen gave him. "The Queen demanded you to be there as well. She said I want Valentine's experiments, especially the demon-blooded kid."
"I mean that's just great. All I wanted was some rest." Justin walked away and to his Institute room to find some decent clothes for where they were going.
Alec watched him go away and he sighed. He did notice Justin was looking rough for a while, but he didn't want to push the redhead into talking about something he was not ready about. He did it once and it didn't end well.
➰
It was two hours later when Justin found himself with Jace at the bridge, both of them clad in winter clothes. Why, Justin didn't know but he was forced by Izzy to bundle up because then he would be whining that he was cold. Justin scoffed when Izzy said that. If he ever got cold, he would suck it up and not let Isabelle gloat about how she told him. He would never admit it.
"What the hell is taking her so long?" Jace rolled his eyes at the fifth time Justin complained that Clary was not there yet. He agrees with his brothe-not his brother about the situation, but he wasn't going to give the satisfaction to Justin. "Like, we had a time to meet, and she couldn't make it?"
His voice trailed off as he heard shuffling behind them. Turning around in sync, the two men saw Clary approaching, with a specific Downworlder at her side. Justin scowled. "What is it doing here?"
Simon sent him a tightlipped smile. "Hello to you, too, Justin." The redhead glared at him. "I'm joining the mission."
"Why?" Justin asked in disgust. Look, don't get him wrong, he tolerated Simon ever since he became part of their world, but he just wanted things with the Seelie Queen to go as smoothly as possible, and having this vampire with them was not a good idea.
"You weren't invited," Jace interjected.
"I already told him that," Clary said, sighing.
"Then leave."
Simon ignored Justin. "But then I pointed out that you can never have too much backup. And you've seen my fighting skills firsthand."
Jace's eyes widened. "There will be no fighting." His tone was serious, and Justin knew how critical the situation was just by it. "If you hurt anyone in the queen's realm, she had every right to hurt you." It made sense; she was the queen after all. "This is a sensitive political mission. It takes a certain charm."
Simon pulled a funny face. "Well, I'll have you know, I was voted vice president in eighth grade. And you do not win an election without charm. So..."
Justin furrowed his eyebrows. "Weren't you the only one that was running?"
Jace looked at Justin and sent him a look basically saying Don't encourage this. Justin nodded and looked down at his feet, still chuckling about the previous conversation.
"Simon, this isn't middle school. This is life or death."
"Have you been to middle school?" Simon raised an eyebrow. Clary chuckled, making Simon smile at her. Justin rolled his eyes at the interaction. They were wasting precious time in this nonsense.
"Look, Seelies have the beauty of angels and the viciousness of demons, and those opposing qualities make them unpredictable." Justin nodded along with the words. He may have known a bit of the Shadow World beforehand, but a new lesson was never unwelcomed. "A vampire or a werewolf, they prefer to attack you head-on, but Seelies, they wanna trick you into your own self-destruction."
Simon cast a look at Clary and then back at Jace. "That's a little dramatic, don't you think? I mean, aren't the Seelies, like, woodland hippies who eat berries and dance?"
"Have you met the Shadow World? Nothing is what it seems."
Jace pointed a finger at Justin. "Exactly. You thought the same about Kaelie."
Simon nodded. "And who saved Clary from her?"
Clary sighed. This stupid fight was getting them nowhere. "Jace, you're not gonna get him to change his mind." Jace sent her a deadly look. "We have to go. Where's the entrance?"
Although not convinced by Simon's presence, Jace simply looked down the bridge. "There."
The duo rested against the fence and looked at the running water. "The Seelie Court is in a creek?"
Justin stood beside Jace getting ready to jump. "Not in it. Through it." He looked at his redhead friend and took off running, making a jump and disappearing through thin air. Justin laughed, the first real laugh in a long time, and followed him through the same opening.
The Seelie Court.
It looked beautiful as one can imagine the Seelie Court would look. With snow falling and coating the dirt, to the sun shining bright and the trees and animals as beautiful as ever. It felt like out of a fairytale, and it was even more perfect than one can imagine. Justin looked around, feeling the snowflakes hitting his hair and cheeks. It felt peaceful like he could relax there.
Once Clary and Simon landed beside them and were mesmerized by the place, Jace pointed the way. "After you, Mr. Vice President." Simon scowled but turned and walked the way Jace pointed, with Clary trailing behind him.
After too much walking for Justin's liking, and Simon almost being killed by a tree, they made it to the Queen. Justin was still mesmerized at how beautiful everything in the realm was.
"Welcome."
Seelies appeared all around them, caressing their cheeks and touching their arms and hairs. It was quick but Justin noticed that they were sneaky enough to grab their weapons and leave them defenseless right there.
"You'll get them back when you leave the court," an innocent voice told them. Justin guided his eyes to meet with the stranger and he saw a little girl clad in fancy dresses and jewelry with a crown on top of her head. Justin was surprised that the Queen was a kid, but he didn't show any emotion.
"Your majesty..." Jace bowed at her and nodded his head for the three others to follow his lead. "What a rare honor."
"Wait, that's the queen?" Simon asked. Justin sent him a glare from the corner of his eyes, begging him to stop talking.
"Why is the vampire here?" The queen tilted her head, her eyes zeroing on the Downworlder. "He was not invited."
"He's with me," Clary is fast to answer, just in case the queen or any other faerie tries something against her best friend.
"My lady, Simon has proven himself a worthy warrior and a loyal friend." Justin had to keep a straight face as he mentally laughed at Jace's words. He wonders how much it pained the blond to utter those words about Simon. "We insisted he be here with us. Anything you have to say to us, you can say to him."
"Very well." The queen nodded. "The vampire can stay."
"You are generous as you are lovely."
The Queen descended her throne and walked closer to the newcomers. "Set an extra place at the table for our fourth guest," she instructed one of her servants. She extended her hand towards Clary, who hesitantly grabbed it and allowed the Queen to pull her behind her.
"This is going to be fun."