The journey back to Earth was unfortunately unwelcome for Jayler, but he knew that they would have to go back home sooner or later. He simply wished that it didn't have to be so soon after he had finally reunited with Jay after being away from her for so long. The other Clan Leaders were more than happy to give him some space since he was dealing with being overwhelmed by all that had taken place, but Jayler could tell that they were curious about how everything had gone over. Jayler was eager to share, but he knew that he was going to have to be careful with how he explained it. There was so much that he wanted to say, but actually getting it all out was going to be a struggle.
It wasn't until the next day of school that the Clan Leaders were able to gather together to talk about it. Jayler sat down at the lunch table quickly, one foot bouncing in place. He was the first one to arrive aside from Gemini, though in all fairness, she was early to everything. Gemini watched Jayler out of the corner of her eye as she flicked through the pages of her book. He could tell that was trying to see if he would calm down on his own terms, but when he didn't, she simply shrugged it off.
As the others arrived, Jayler's excitement only grew. By the time that the final member of their team had sat down, Jayler didn't know how much more he was going to be able to take. "Alright, we're all here," he declared with a wide grin. "I want to tell you guys about what happened with Jay. She told me everything about what she's been up to since the end of the war on Daragon, you know. She's apparently been trying to pull together the Skylian Mages. They're a Hanilia faction, though I suppose that you guys already knew that... She's one of them. That's the reason that she didn't wind up as a Clan Leader. She had already been selected by Lyloc to be a Skylian Mage."
"That certainly lines up with what she told you before the war split us up," Gemini murmured to herself. She had put her book away and was focusing on eating her food, though Jayler suspected that she still yearned to return to the world of fiction once again.
"Yeah, exactly," Jayler agreed. "Well, she said that she was planning on coming to see us again after her mission ended, but it didn't wind up going exactly as she was hoping. She got caught up in the search for the Skylian Mages, so it took a bit longer than anticipated. At the very least, they were able to come and see us when we were last at the castle. That's a good thing in my eyes."
"What else did she tell you?" Ocean asked with a light smile. Jayler's positive energy was reflecting positively on her, it seemed. This was par for the course with Ocean as far as Jayler was aware; she had a habit of internalizing what others said and did around her, though it was often a curse rather than the blessing it was in that moment.
"She said that there's something threatening the safety of Skylia. It seems to me like the chaos that was left behind in the wake of the Skylox Heroes falling is being taken advantage of. If you ask me, the one behind it just has to be Alba. I can't think of anybody else who it could be. If it isn't them, then it's somebody we aren't aware of, and I think I like the outcome of it being them more," Jayler replied.
"They sure did a great job of trying to freeze us in the castle," Luke remarked with a shake of his head. "I hate to admit that, but... There was a lot of effort put into that attack. I bet that they had been making extra soldiers for a while to use against us, and they just so happened to pick that as the perfect time to strike. Whether that was an accurate assessment or not is your choice entirely though."
"Well, it didn't work, so I'm going to say that Alba messed up, but they came pretty damn close to actually overpowering us and winning in that fight," Xia muttered. "I mean, if they had managed to freeze over the castle completely before those random attacks stopped them, then that would have made everything a lot harder on our end. After all, not everybody is made to withstand temperatures like that. Fire mages have a higher body temperature, so they would have been fine, and Ice mages are used to stuff like that. The rest of us... Yeah, it wouldn't have been pretty."
"The attack that finished the fight came from Zelda," Lex chimed in, and Jayler frowned as he glanced up at her. Lex seemed to lack her regular fire, no pun intended, and it was starting to bother him. Lex had always possessed a sense of passion that rubbed off on those around her, earning Lex the admiration of others easily. Today though, it seemed as if she was nothing more than a hollow shell of her former self, and it was jarring to see her so lacking in vitality compared to how she normally was.
"I was wondering where the other strike came from," Jayler murmured. "Jay did one of the two attacks that finished the fight. If Zelda did the other one..." His words trailed off. No matter how hard he tried, he didn't think that he would be able to end the sentence in a satisfying way. All of them were fully aware of the issues that existed between Jay and Zelda. It was pointless to pretend that the conflict didn't exist when it was so obvious that they didn't exactly like one another.
In all honesty, Jayler thought that it was more complicated than the two simply not wanting to spend time together. In Jay's case, she didn't like Zelda for her major role in the fall of the Skylox Heroes. Since the Skylox Heroes had been the only family that she ever knew, it was natural that she would respond with hostility when she learned that Zelda was both responsible and fighting as her ally. Zelda, on the other hand, didn't seem to feel much of anything towards Jay. She had remained detached and rarely interacted with Jay if it could be avoided, and Jayler didn't think that they were going to be speaking unless they absolutely had to.
Jay's feelings were natural as far as Jayler was concerned. Why wouldn't she be upset? Zelda had done awful things when she was working as a general in the Fearbringer army, and none of them would ever be able to deny such a truth no matter how hard they tried. He wished that there was a way to bridge the gap between them, but the last thing that Jayler wanted to do was push it unnecessarily. Given the stress that had been placed upon the shoulders of the Hanilia in the wake of Alba's attack, it felt like an extra piece of weight that would only cause problems in the long run.
"That's going to result in an interesting conversation," Xia snorted as she shook her head. "If I recall correctly, one of the reasons that she hid her face during the war on Daragon was because she was trying to keep from drawing attention to herself. If you want to get specific, it's because she was trying to avoid Zelda finding out too much about her after she survived the attack on the castle where the Skylox Heroes lived and operated."
Jayler winced at Xia's words. She was blunt, knowing just what to say and not bothering with the formality of tact to make sure that others understood. Xia had a point, as much as he hated to admit it. That was exactly the reason that Jay had started to hide her face from the rest of the world, and he had heard as much from her during the conflict on Daragon. From there, it was passed on and shared with the rest of the Clan Leaders. He wished that there was something he could do to make the dynamic between Zelda and Jay less tense, but he knew that it wasn't any of his business. Jayler did enjoy snooping every once in a while, but in this situation, it just felt wrong.
"They're going to have to work out their issues sooner or later," Gemini said next. "They're going to be living in the castle for quite some time. We have a reason to leave because we're currently forced to go back and forth between the worlds, but all other Hanilia should stay gathered together there for the sake of remaining united in the face of another attack. If they're going to be so close in proximity, then they have to work out everything before it becomes a larger issue. If you leave a crack to grow for too long, it will cause everything else to explode."
"You know what I've decided, Gemini?" Jayler cut in. Gemini glanced up at him as she poked at her food mindlessly with a plastic fork. "I hate it when you're right." Gemini snorted in response before focusing on eating once again.
"We'll leave it to them. Unless we have to get in the middle of it, I think it would be best to let them handle it," Ocean said. She was quiet for a moment before she looked over to Lex. Concern was in her gaze, and Jayler was comforted by the knowledge that he wasn't the only one who had noticed that the blonde Clan Leader was acting strangely.
"When we next go to Hyperion, we're going to have to keep looking around for Alba. I mean, they've shown their face, so that means we're going to be able to figure out more about them. If we get the right hints, we'll be able to find their hideout. That's what I'm hoping for, at the very least. Since we know what they look like, that gives us an inherent advantage. We don't have to rely on rumors as much if we can actually get physical confirmation of where they're hiding out," Luke told the group next. He seemed to be covering for the lull in conversation left behind by Ocean's open concern.
Jayler nodded his agreement. "We know what we have to do at the very least. That's a good thing to hear, if you ask me. We've got four Hanilia factions working together now, and that's going to make it easier for us to track Alba down. If we all work together, then this is going to be a piece of cake," he told them. He was quiet once again as he looked over to Lex. The longer that he thought about his friend being so quiet, the more it bothered him.
"Are you alright?" Xia suddenly questioned, her gaze falling on Lex. Her eyes were narrowed, a sign that she meant business above all else. She set her fork down and focused on propping her chin up against her hands. Everything about her made it clear that she wasn't going to allow Lex to slip away without a fight.
Lex glanced up when she realized that she was the one being addressed. When she did so, Jayler saw something clear as day in her bright blue eyes: vulnerability. Lex usually covered such up with a broad smile and promises of optimism, and seeing her so blatantly express weakness made him feel anxious. He was more focused on helping her than soothing his own anxiety, but his stomach still tied itself into a knot when he saw her face.
"Um... Well..." Lex began, her eyes distant as she looked down at the table. After a few moments, she shook her head. "I don't think that we have time to talk about it here. We need to discuss it in Hyperion. Next time that we go back to the castle, we have to find a private space to talk about this. It's... Let's just say that I found something out, and I don't know entirely how I'm supposed to respond to it. Whether you think of it as a good or bad thing is entirely your choice, but... It's a lot to think about, and I have no idea what to do from here. There's an expectation, but I don't think I'll be able to live up to it no matter how hard I try."
Somehow, that only made Jayler more nervous. He nodded slowly in response to her words. "Um... Okay," he eventually said. He trusted that she knew what she was doing. He had learned to place his trust and confidence in all of the Clan Leaders, and Lex was no exception to this rule. She had to know what was going on, and she would share it when the time was right. Jayler hoped that it would be sooner rather than later, but he wasn't going to push her if he didn't have to. Once again, he yearned to respect her privacy, and he decided that it was likely a subject best left alone.
"When are we going back anyways?" Xia questioned, her words offering an instant relief of levity that made Jayler sigh to himself. He hadn't realized that he was holding his breath until after he let it go.
"Next few days, I would assume," Gemini replied. "I mean, they have to focus on fixing the castle for now. I don't know how much good we would be able to do given that we're not exactly the most adept with our magic yet. Even if we were able to do something that would make the recovery process easier, it would be faster for the experienced mages to knock it out. Plus, the Fearbringers are probably going to continue their investigation into where Alba could be hiding."
"We'll just have to see when Tuila reaches out again," Luke said to himself. He looked over to Lex with a small yet weary smile. "I hope that you know that you can reach out to us no matter what happens. We're here for you, and that isn't going to change no matter what you tell us about this strange truth you've learned. That's a promise."
Lex looked at Luke in surprise for a long moment, and Luke's expression shifted to fear as he realized that interference might not have been the best decision he had ever made. However, Lex instead smiled and closed her eyes. "Thanks," she murmured. "I'm going to tell you guys about it when I can, but... Let's just say that it's a lot to take in. Now isn't a good time, but I'll tell you everything when we're next in Hyperion. I promise."
Jayler nodded his understanding, still concerned about what it was that could have been plaguing Lex so deeply. He hoped that he would be able to do something to help her, but there was no way to say for sure how it was going to unfold until after they went to Hyperion next. He let out a sigh and closed his eyes, praying with everything he had that it wasn't awful enough to merit a panicked reaction. He forced himself to shove it to the back of his mind for the time being as he rose to his feet.
The lunch bell interrupted their conversation before it could go any further, and Jayler glanced to the nearby hallway that he was set to go through. "Well, I guess that's that," he muttered. He shook his head and gave the rest of the Clan Leaders one last look. "I'll talk to you guys later. We can go back to Hyperion in a few days and see what we can find out about Alba while we're there. For now, do what you can to stay out of trouble, okay?"
"You know I never do that," Xia joked, earning her a laugh from Jayler. She got up as well, and the other Clan Leaders followed her example before streaming out of the cafeteria in their separate directions.
Jayler was halfway to his next class when a frown appeared on his face once again. He didn't know what he was supposed to think about all of Lex's sudden odd behavior. He hoped that whatever was happening wasn't too awful, but he somehow knew that it was going to change things. Lex wouldn't be making such a big deal of it if it wasn't significant somehow. Jayler didn't know what it was going to mean, but he was going to try to not let the paranoia eat him alive until then. That was easier said than done, but it wasn't going to keep him from making the attempt.
~~~~~
It didn't take a genius to see what Jay was doing.
She had been sitting in the room that had been given to her ever since that morning. It had taken some arranging between her and Tuila, but she was able to get into her old room from before the Skylox Heroes fell. It was cruel irony that she was back there after so much time. Jay didn't think that it felt entirely right, but she wasn't exactly in a place to protest it, so she didn't bother with being open in her objections.
She stared out the window with glossy eyes, and it was clear to anybody who happened to look her way that she wasn't paying attention. Luckily for Jay, she was alone, meaning it wasn't possible for anyone to make scathing observations about her behavior. She wouldn't have wanted to hear it anyways, so all she did was sit in her room in the quiet.
In some ways, Jay felt better about how everything was going. She was happy to have been given the chance to see her brother again, and even if she hadn't spoken with the other Clan Leaders, she was positive that talking to them was going to bring her joy as well. Jay had always wanted to become closer with them, and she figured that it would only be sweeter when she wasn't being held back by the world at large.
On top of that, there was the matter of Jay being able to embrace her truth at long last. She wasn't as concerned with hiding the honesty of the past anymore thanks to finally opening up to the other Skylian Mages about the events that had transpired before she went searching for them. It was nice to be able to relax around them, and Jay confessed that it was easier to be around them after her admission than it ever had been before. She felt safe with them somehow, though it was impossible for her to describe the intricate reasons of why. She decided to simply claim that it was the gods themselves meddling in the lives of those on the planets, proof that she and the rest of the Skylian Mages truly were meant to fight together then and forever.
However, there were other things that made Jay feel as if she wanted nothing more than to curl up in a ball deep underground until ten years passed at minimum. To be more accurate, there was a single reason that she had come to be so uncomfortable in the place that she once called home. There was someone in the castle that she absolutely did not want to run into at any costs, and that left her too agitated and anxious to leave her room if it could be avoided. If people needed her, they would come to her directly, and that was a nice alternative to Jay roaming the castle and seeing if people had to speak to her in a casual manner. She didn't want to be outside if it could be avoided. The idea of stepping beyond the walls of her room was nauseating in a way she despised.
The explanation for why she felt this way was ultimately rather simple: Zelda. Jay didn't want to run into her in the slightest. She didn't know if she would ever be truly ready to talk to Zelda about what had happened in the past. They had been brought together by a thousand different coincidences, it seemed, and Jay began to curse each and every one of them for daring to insinuate that they had to be on the same side.
Jay knew that it was inevitable that they spoke again. It was just a matter of time before they were forced to talk about what they had been through and how they were connected to one another. That didn't mean that Jay had to look forward to it though, and she sure as hell wouldn't ever be eager about what was to come. Zelda was somebody who she had once hated above all else, and yet, Jay knew that she didn't always have this option.
The job of the Hanilia was to defend the Galaxy of Hyperion. This was something that Jay had heard about when she was training as an apprentice under the Skylox Heroes, and she knew that it still rang true even years after the fact. She wouldn't ever be able to alter the truth of the matter: she had to defend the Galaxy of Hyperion from any danger that appeared. For a long time, she thought that the Fearbringers were part of this evil category, but upon closer examination, the situation was much more complicated than that. Jay almost wished with a bitter heart that she hadn't ever noticed the complexities of the situation. It was easier to simply slash a sword and hate people that she didn't know than to acknowledge that she and Zelda were going to have to work together sooner or later.
A knock on the door immediately snapped Jay away from her thoughts. She waited for the person to speak before saying anything. "Hey, Jay. Can we talk?" Lana questioned, her voice just as soothing as it always had been.
It took Jay a moment to find her voice once again, so she nodded despite knowing that Lana wouldn't be able to see the action. "Yes," she eventually forced herself to say through gritted teeth. Maybe talking would make all of this easier. She was confident that Lana had picked up on her odd behavior the way that she noticed everything else. That had to be the reason that Lana was approaching her this way in the first place.
Lana sat down next to Jay on her bed after shutting the door, and they both remained silent for quite some time. "It's about Zelda, isn't it?" Lana eventually questioned, breaking through the quiet slowly but carefully.
Jay nodded in response. "I don't know what to do," she confessed. "Nothing feels like it makes sense anymore. I know that I have to get over this sooner or later. Hanilia need to work together to save the world as a whole, and I can't exactly do that if I'm constantly thinking about impaling her on my blade. Pardon me for being a touch violent, but... I guess that this sort of thing upsets me."
"And that's okay," Lana assured her immediately. "You aren't under any obligation to forgive her immediately, you know. The pressure is still there since what happened was recent. You have every right to remain upset about this for as long as you feel is justified. The gods might have said that we would have to work together with her, but that doesn't mean that we have to immediately forgive her for everything that she's ever done. You get to do that at your own pace. Don't try to hold back your own emotions. That's just going to make everything worse."
Jay looked up to Lana in surprise, unsure of how she was meant to respond to that. For a moment, she simply stared with her jaw dropped. When she finally did reply, it was only after she had swallowed dryly. "I... Thanks for that, Lana. I appreciate hearing that," she murmured. "I don't know what to do, honestly. It's a matter of time before I have to get over this. It feels like I'm just piling on at this point. On one hand, I know that it's right that I hate her, but on the other... I don't know. I guess I wish that I could just leave all of this behind and think about other things instead. It's a mess."
"Nobody said that emotions were meant to be easy. You're allowed to feel how you want, and nobody can ever take that away from you," Lana assured her soothingly. "You have a right to forgive her when you feel the time is right. She did a lot to hurt you, and that's something that nobody can deny. Even if you have to collaborate with her, that doesn't mean you have to be friends. You're under no obligation to do something that goes against what you've been through, especially if it's on this level."
"There's a lot that goes into this," Jay confessed quietly. "I want to get over this. I wish that I didn't have to feel all of this messy crap, but I can't just shove it aside. I'm a warrior above all else. I always have been. I need to be able to defend those who require aid, and that requires pushing aside my feelings, but... For some reason, I just can't do it this time."
"You're a human, not a blade," Lana interjected. "If you have emotions, then you deserve to express them. In fact, I know for sure that you do have emotions, and you shouldn't hold them back just because of how you feel that you're supposed to act. Everybody else has a right to express themselves, and that applies to you as well, no matter how much you try to ignore such a fact. You dehumanize yourself because you don't want to acknowledge your feelings, but that isn't healthy. You were doing it when you didn't want to talk about the past, and that was why I pushed you to start opening up. Holding everything in won't do you any good in the long term. You need to start talking to people before you let the pressure grow to be so much that you crush yourself under the weight."
That left Jay silent, and all she could do was stare at Lana for a long moment as she attempted to gather her bearings. Lana's words had stripped her of everything that she could have used to defend herself, and Jay knew that it was because she was right. She didn't know when this hadn't been a habit of hers, and she wished that she was able to pull herself away from the burning sensation of hatred inside. She didn't know if there was more animosity directed at Zelda or anguish aimed at herself, but she didn't think that she wanted to find out in the first place.
"Wow," Jay eventually said with a swallow. She let out a bitter choke of a laugh, unsure of how else she was meant to respond. Lana's eyes softened, a sign that she was listening. "I... I don't know if I'm ever going to be able to forgive Zelda. I really don't know. She took away everything from me, and I can't just roll over and be okay with that. She destroyed the Skylox Heroes, the only home I had ever known. Even if it was on orders from Mersall, I can't forgive that, at least not yet. I hate knowing that there's a chance I'll have to see her each time that I step out of this room. I don't want to see her face or hear what she has to say to me. I saw her during the war, yes, but... She didn't know that it was me back then. There was no way for her to be aware since I was hiding my face. I only masked myself because I didn't want her to know that I was there. I couldn't face her no matter how hard I tried since I knew what would come of it. Talking to her... I..."
"It's okay," Lana assured her. She placed one hand around Jay's shoulders when she was sure that it was an alright move to make. "You know, if you want to, I'll stay with you here for as long as you need. I'll listen to anything that you have to say regardless of how ridiculous you think it sounds. I want to do what I can to help you, Jay. We're going to be friends forever. I can just tell at this point. Hanilia or otherwise, I want to help you."
Jay stared down at her hands for a long time, uncertain of how to reply to something like that. Lana's voice made it clear that she was nothing but sincere, but Jay still wasn't sure of what to say in response. She took in a deep breath before letting it out. "That... That sounds nice," she admitted.
Afterwards, Jay fell silent, but she didn't think that she had to say anything about it. Instead, she simply let her head slip into position against Lana's shoulder, and the other girl stayed there with her for a long while. Time was forgotten, and Jay was more than fine with that. She drifted off into slumber at some point, but when she woke, Lana was still there, watching her with a gentle smile. Jay wondered what she had done to deserve someone as kind as Lana, and she closed her eyes once again, realizing that everything was going to be okay one way or another.
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Today has been a day
-Digital