Bliss. Pure, utter bliss. That's really the only way I know how to describe how I'm feeling right now.
He's my mate.
I'm his mate.
Holy shit.
Az and I spent the remainder of the night tangled in each other, making love slow and unhurried; reveling in this complete state of euphoria. It was like we couldn't get enough. We'd be fully spent, sweating and gasping for air when a simple touch from the other suddenly gave us the energy to be at it again within minutes.
Azriel on this crazy mating bond sex binge is something else. He's wild and untamed, hungry for any kind of contact I'll give him and it's so fucking hot. Last night we made love, but today we fucked. Both equally as passionate, but in such different ways, and on so many different surfaces in this house.
Even when we had finally found it necessary to venture downstairs to eat, we didn't last more than 15 minutes before the sight of Az's naked torso, gleaming with sweat in the sunlight of the kitchen had me starving for anything but food. He finally took me on the kitchen table that he's been so eager to try and get me naked on for weeks. This side of him was so raw and unhinged, I couldn't keep my hands off of him even if I wanted to. Don't get me wrong, I love my sweet, sarcastic, Shadowsinger more than anything but this? This was fun.
By late afternoon we were both so exhausted, especially me given the fact that I don't have the bounce back time like a certain someone. Az and I were sitting on opposite ends of the couch, trying our best to maintain a solid distance for at least another hour. It was comical really, seeing the light in his eyes darken as he watched my lips while I spoke, his fingers curling into a fist on the back of the couch when I'd throw my head back and laugh, exposing the bite marks he'd left there. I found that I was torturing myself just the same, as I watched those hands of his toying with the seam of the couch, knowing damn well what those long scarred fingers were capable of.
"Are you even listening to me?" I peeled my eyes away from his hands and was faced with a smirking Azriel.
"You weren't even talking."
"Yes I was. I was talking about the last war." He said with a hint of a smile curling on his lips. I narrowed my eyes and clicked my tongue, "No you most certainly were not. You've already told me about the war," I sat up straighter on the couch, still keeping my sharp gaze on him, "You're a terrible liar. You just want me to feel bad for not listening to you so I'll come over there and break my own rule." He shifted on the couch, leaning more towards me. "It's a stupid rule really and rules are meant to be broken on occasion."
"So you admit it! You weren't talking about anything!"
"No, I just think there's no reason why we need to be sitting 3 feet away from each other. I think it's going against nature to be that far away from my mate while she's in the same room as me." he inched forward slightly, watching me as I sat myself more upright. His eyes were bright, nowhere near as lustful as they'd been for most of today.
"I mean I'm fully capable of sitting close to you, it's you I worry about. You can't seem to keep your hands off me." I shot him a satisfying smirk as he rolled his eyes.
"Last I recall, it was you who initiated the last time, and the time before that. Something about 'my ass being too good not to touch.'"
He got me there. It was true though, his ass was too good not to touch. I told him that when I first got to Velaris, I would watch him leave rooms just so I could stare at his lovely behind in his Illyrian fighting leathers. Football pants have nothing on those bad boys.
I covered my face with my hands and laughed, "You're making this really difficult."
"Your stupid rule, not mine." He was just barely leaning over me now, and I felt his hands graze the side of my leg. I wore one of his long sleeve tunics, so my legs were bare from the knee down and every touch of his fingers sent a chill down my spine. I uncovered my face just to be met with his blazing hazel eyes only an inch from mine. I arched a brow, "Hi, can I help you?"
"Yes, in fact you can," He leaned in and brushed his lips over mine; that whisper of a kiss had me sucking in a short breath. "You see, you keep biting your bottom lip and it's very distracting."
I chuckled and bit my lip out of reflex. Azriel groaned, and let his lips hover just above mine. "So how am I supposed to help you with that?" I whispered, his full breaths falling against my lips in waves. "You should just let me bite it for you." He leaned in and nicked my bottom lip with his teeth before sweeping his tongue across it.
"Are you fully satisfied now?" I asked, well more like gasped.
"Not even remotely." His voice dropped an octave as he pushed my knees apart, settling on top of me. He started kissing over the marks on my neck, letting his tongue make appearances every now and then. He pulled down the top of my--his shirt, and kissed a path over my now exposed shoulder. Coming back, he kissed up my neck, to my jaw, then finally settled on my lips.
We sat there for a few minutes, just kissing and some subtle touching but nothing came from it. Azriel pulled away from my lips and nuzzled his face into my chest. He let his wings fall behind him, gently hitting the floor and the back of the couch. I let my hands fall to his hair and ran my fingers through it, gently kissing the top of his head. "The night you'd made that promise to come back safely, was the night I realized I was in love with you," I whispered, trying to ignore the hammering of my heart as I stroked his hair. "When you told me you'd never made that promise to anyone before, I lost it. The way you looked at me, the way you held me, I couldn't bear picturing a single day without you from that point on. You became everything to me." He tucked one arm under my waist while the other began making lazy strokes up and down my forearm.
"I knew I was in love with you, that night I came back here drunk with Rhys and Cass," he stifled a laugh on my chest, "I was so drunk at one point, that I hadn't realized my mental shields were down and that never happens. I was so consumed by thoughts of you, I didn't care who knew it and Rhys, the asshole, went into my mind and blurted it out in front of Cassian. I didn't know what to do; you had only been here less than a few months and I didn't want to scare you away. Not having you as even a friend would have killed me." I smiled, gently pulling his head from my chest to kiss him once.
We switched positions on the couch so that I was curled up to him now and letting his hands brush along my thighs. Nuzzling into his chest, I managed to drape one leg over him, completely attaching myself to his side. He kissed the top of my head and started playing with my hair, "The night I realized it was more than love, that you were my mate, is a completely different story."
"Tell me about it. I want to know how this whole thing works, aside from this insane sex frenzy bit...which I'm not complaining about by the way."
He pinched at my thigh and laughed, "Well I'm glad you have no complaints."
"Not a one." I sighed, sinking into him more than I already was.
"When a mating bond is formed, it takes a while for it to snap for both sides. For males it's easier for us to notice it, but for females it typically snaps into place during sex."
"Which would make sense as to why it was so intense between us last night." I said.
"I'd also like to believe that it was because I'm just that fantastic in bed."
I laughed, "Oh you are. You're fantastic on other surfaces too I might add. The bedroom wall being a top favorite." His hand twitched at my side, tugging at the hem of my shirt. "Anyway," I said as I grabbed his hand and laced his fingers with mine, "back to this mating bond. When did you know?"
He sat up a bit straighter and ran his thumb across the back of my hand, "When I fully knew? Or when I started to piece it together?"
"Both."
"When you first came to Velaris, after you left the table at dinner that night of your panic attack, I felt drawn to you. I felt your pain and all I wanted to do was help you. When I got up to check on you, Rhys insisted you just needed some time to adjust but I knew that wasn't the case. You weren't scared, you were sad and I felt this pull at my heart saying, 'Go out there and see if she'll even talk to you' and you did. You talked to me, opened up to me and that pull on my heart grew stronger."
I closed my eyes and let out a deep sigh, remembering that night and how I felt drawn to him too. I remember not wanting to talk to anyone at that moment but the second he came outside I felt comfortable with him almost instantly.
"I did everything I could from that point on to be near you, to make sure you were always safe. That's why I offered to stay at the townhouse with you after that first week. I could sense your comfort with me around, and I had never felt that with anyone; besides my family. One night I had heard you crying, and my shadows traveled to the door, almost begging me to get up. When I did, I knocked on your door and I had fully expected you to pretend to be asleep but to my surprise you opened it. Your eyes were bloodshot, redness had stained your cheeks and you insisted on looking down at your feet to hide your face from me. You have no idea the strength it took not to grab you and pull you into me. I would have given anything to take that pain away from your eyes."
I leaned up to look at him, and found that he was already looking down at me, "I remember that. You sat with me while I cried, while I dumped all my problems on you."
"I wanted to be there for you in any way you'd have me" Az ran his thumb on the side of my cheek and kissed me once.
"So that was the start, and then everything started falling into place every moment I spent with you afterwards. The night we all went to Rita's after you got drunk off of two glasses of wine and had insisted on walking around the city," he started laughing, "You latched onto my arm and said 'I'm taking him with me, he's tall and muscley and nice to look at' and dragged me down the street. I didn't even think twice, I just went with you and let you wander. You kept your arm looped with mine the entire night, leaning your head against my shoulder and I swear I could physically see my heart thundering below my chest. We had never had this much contact beyond an occasional hug or a brush of hands here and there."
"That wine was no joke, I was a goner after one glass. I remember staring at you the entire night because your shirt was unbuttoned just enough so that I could see your tattoos and my God Az, you were killing me slowly. I was trying to find excuses to get my hands on you in any way that I could." I buried my face into his side and groaned. "But, I guess it's pretty safe to say we're long past just simple touches now." I laughed, tightening the grip of my leg that was draped across him. Az squeezed right back, letting his hand drift to the curve of my ass.
"Thank the cauldron because I was losing my mind not being able to touch you the way I wanted." I looked up at him and arched a brow, "There was an afternoon that you had gone shopping with Mor and I knew I was going to be tortured the second you got back. You had bags upon bags and Mor had insisted you go try everything on for all of us, to show off your Night Court attire. You came downstairs with your hair tossed over one shoulder, wearing this black satin dress that nearly had me on my knees before you. You looked at me and your face instantly flushed, I could sense the change in your scent and with all the willpower in the world, I braced myself against the wall I was leaning on. I had to stop myself from thinking about how fast I could rip that dress off you and get my mouth on every inch of your body."
I shuddered, trying to contain my thoughts that could very well get us into trouble. Azriel turned his body into mine and pulled me against his chest.
"The night you kissed me, all of my senses were shot; I couldn't breathe. The moment your hand went around my neck, I forgot how to exist. I'm an expert at hiding my emotions, regardless of what they are, but you saw right through me. You made a joke about being pressed against you and all of my nerves melted away. You're so good at keeping me on my toes and pulling out the best parts of me; the bond tugged harder that night and I knew." He kissed my forehead.
"It fully snapped for me the night I told you that I loved you. I spent a few hours with Rhys and Feyre absolutely pouring out my soul to them. Rhys had been mated with Feyre before she became Fae, and I had no idea if what I was feeling with you was true. When I came back to the house, you were sitting on the couch with your hair pulled back and the fire casted this soft light across your face and it ruined me. You were so serene, so beautiful and so mine. I had spent the flight over to the house muttering that word to myself over and over again. Mine. You were my mate, and you were mine."
"So that's why you were so out of it." I laughed and leaned my chin on top of his chest.
"I was not out of it." he flicked my nose once, "I was so blissfully in love with you that I couldn't figure out which emotion to act on first." he started chuckling again, "500 years without a mate, and mine, so utterly and beautifully human, stumbles into Prythian by accident," He let out a content half laugh, half sigh, "That night...That night I saw everything. I saw forever."
I pulled his face to mine and kissed him slowly, "You are my forever."
His arms tightened around me as he kissed me again, letting his hands tangle into my hair. When I pulled away, I unhooked myself from him and stood up, lacing my fingers with his. "What are you doing?" He asked, rising from the couch.
"We're going upstairs," I pulled him along as I walked up the steps to my room and leaned on the door, pressing him against my chest, "So I can make love to you again, and again, and again..."
"I like the sound of that."
---