"Silene." he says while hugging me tightly.
I'm not even sure what Juan feels about this. Probably, I just ruined his life with a few words. But, he's still caressing my back, holding me tightly, waiting for me to calm.
After I told him, I couldn't control my tears, but, truth to be told, I'm not even sure if there were tears of joy or sadness. I guess, I have to know what Juan thinks too so I can settle.
"There are diamonds in the bear." is the first sentence I manage to say. "I think we have to do something."
"Who cares about diamonds now?" surprisingly, his voice is calmer than I expected. "I want you to tell me how you feel about it."
"I don't know." I admit. "You?"
"If you want me to be honest..." Juan says with a smile. "I'm happy about it, but in no way my opinion matters. When it comes to this, you'll have to decide."
"No." I say feeling how the panic starts crawling in my soul. "Don't let me choose. We decide together, okay?"
"Fine." he says trying hard to hold his smile. "I'm happy as long as you are."
"Same." I conclude. "It's a bit late anyway."
"Late?" he asks while arranging my hair behind the ear. "What do you mean late?"
"Tatiana said that the pill might not have such an effect, because according to her I might've remained pregnant when we made love for first time in Lisbon." I look at Juan and see how he's biting his lip in the moment when I invoked Lisbon. "I think that is like two months and a half ago."
"Silene, you know there are other methods in case you want to get rid of it." he says trying to sound neutral, but there's a hint of sadness in his voice. "I don't want you to feel forced."
"Look at me." I say taking his face in my palms. "I'm keeping it. It's not mine or yours, it's ours. It's our child and he'll grow into becoming the biggest robber in history."
He bursts into laughter.
"Silene, this life is not suitable for raising a child." he says amused. "I think we should reconsider our priorities."
"I don't even wanna hear." I interrupt him. "I chose this life in the moment when I chose you and there's no way we're gonna abandon it for a kid. He's gonna be a robber just like we are and one night he'll be injured and will hide in a hallway only to be found by a girl who has nothing left to lose."
"Why you assume that it's gonna be a he?" Juan asks smiling.
"I don't know, let's just say that I have some motherly feelings." I say.
Then, his lips unite with mine, sealing our agreement forever. Surely, we're the most distorted parents, but, after all, love will solve any problem that will come in our way. And, a thing I know for sure, both me and Juan will love the bundle of joy that's now happily growing in my womb.
I look at Juan as I'm pushing my maid cart down the hallway. He's glimmering in a way that I haven't seen him till now. All I can think about is that his state is the result after hearing the news about my pregnancy, but I can't completely forget the fact that inside my maid apron, wrapped carefully in a cloth, are twenty diamonds worth over 100,000€.
We both agreed that it's a sign from God and we quickly took the diamonds after we spent several minutes kissing each other and trying not to have sex in that room, as Rodrigo advised us. None of us have even the slightest idea why a married couple with two kids might hide diamonds in a teddy bear, but we couldn't care less. This is an extra reward that's going to help us go on that trip to Tokyo sooner than we expected.
"We have two suites left." Juan tells me while acting like he's looking for a room to leave the luggages that he's carrying after him. "I think I can go to the one in the far right wing and you can take the one that's closer."
"Okay." I say.
"We meet at the elevator." Juan says smiling. "How about who'll find the necklace first receives a prize from the other one?"
"Sounds good to me." I laugh. "But, careful, Juan I'm hard to please."
"I know." he says. "But, I'm ready for it."
He kisses me shortly, then he disappears on the corridor that goes to the right wing. Meanwhile, I'm pushing the cart to my suite, trying not to get distracted and think too much about his surprise prize.
But, what if the necklace isn't in my suite and it's in his? What am I supposed to give him? This leaves me clueless. I always feared for the fact that his birthday is approaching and I have no idea what to get him, but the fact that I might be forced to think of a prize on the spot makes me feel even worse.
I slide the card and open the door, praying that the marked luggages to be here. To my relief, there are some things spread across the room, and nothing indicates me that these guys came here with a hoard of kids. So, it's a good start.
"Gloria are you in there?" a voice shouts from the hallway, making my blood freeze.
"Yes." I say getting in the bathroom.
"Fine!" the woman says. "I'll need you on the first floor at room 102, that huge ass malamute peed the carpet. Finish here quickly and come help me with the beast."
"Yes." I reply, trying to sound as neutral as possible.
I don't know who's Gloria, but surely she'll have to give some explanations in a few hours. A thing is clear though, I don't have much time and I need to move faster.
So, I wait for the other woman to take the elevator, then I get out of the bathroom and start looking for these people's luggages.
There are four Louis Vuitton huge trunks in the dressing, but I can't see the tags anywhere.
"Fuck!" I whisper.
"I got it!" Juan laughs in my earphone.
This is going to be interesting, because in a few hours, when we'll be out of here, I'll have to think of a prize for Juan.
"Congratulations, mi amor." I whisper in the hidden microphone. "You'll get your prize later."
He laughs and I roll my eyes. I can't believe how lucky is this man.
"I'll see you at the elevator, mi amor." he says joyfully then he closes the transmitter.
I should be happy that we got the necklace and our mission is almost done. But, our bet stresses me, as I have no idea what should I do. Maybe some sex is a prize big enough for him.
I'm so absorbed by my thoughts that I don't even notice the woman mopping the floor when I get out of the room, and accidentally push my cart over her bucket and cleaning products.
"Shit!" I say. "I'm so sorry."
"Can't you watch where your pushing that cart, goddamnit!" she says.
I think time stops and I can't feel anything else other than a rush of adrenaline and panic traveling through my entire body. This is the voice of all the fears that I have inside.
"Silene?" she asks visibly shocked while turning around.
I have no idea what the fuck am I supposed to do or say, so I just remain there and look at the person that scares me more than a loaded gun aimed at me — my mother.
My instincts are yelling at me that I should run or do something, but my body is unresponsive to the fear impulses. I'm standing like a statue in the middle of the hallway while my mother is covering her mouth with her hand, trying not to cry.
This is the worst reunion that I could've ever imagined. And I don't think that this is the universe laughing in my face for being so stupid and thinking that I'll never see her again, or simply my punishment for stealing those diamonds from the teddy bear. No matter what it is, truth is that my mother is crying and I really have to do something until that woman who called me later will come back looking for Gloria and she'll realize everything.
"Yes." I reply with my voice shaking.
But I don't get to say anything as my mother catches me in a tight embrace.
"I can't believe." she says through tears. "You're here."
Shit. This is the worst thing that could've happened and I don't have even the slightest idea of how should I get out of this situation.
"How comes that you're here?" she asks in a happy voice.
Yeah, good question.
"I came here for a... a job." I stutter. "This is my first day. It's like a... a trial, see if they'll give me the job or not."
"Finally!" she exclaims. "Thanks God you realized that music isn't a career. It took you a while though."
"Yes." I say trying not to roll my eyes.
"Well, now that you're finally back and you have more brain in that head, we should talk about something more important." she says. "What happened with you in the last couple of months? I've been worried sick! You weren't replying at your phone and I left you plenty of messages."
"I was busy." I'm trying to sound as innocent as possible. "And I lost my phone. That's why I haven't seen your messages."
She looks at me like she's trying t sniff the lie, but in the end her features soften and smiles.
"Here." my mom hands me a card. "Here's my phone number in case you forgot it."
I take the card and let it fall in my apron over the carefully packed diamonds.
"Thanks." I say. "I'll call you. Now, I have to get back to work."
"No, no." she grabs my hand. "Where are you going? I can talk with your boss and ask her to give you a break, so we can stay and discuss more. Dear God, Silene, you have no idea how worried I've been."
"Mom, that's nice of you, but I can't stay." I reply agitated. "As much as I'd want us to talk, I have to be sure I'm making a good first impression."
This discussion makes me feel really uncomfortable. Besides the fact that I'm trying to act normal with the person that made me have almost all the issues that ever existed, I also have to run out of this goddamn hotel until the cameras will start recording again.
"Then, if you're back in Madrid, you should come visit me." she says. "Silene, it's been ten years since I saw you, don't you think that's been enough and it's time to get over our differences. I know I've made mistakes in the past, but who doesn't? Now, I'm open to us and I wish I could fix the past, but I can't do anything other than try to be better now."
I don't know from where she learned these texts, but I'm not buying this new attitude. The last time we talked she screamed at me to leave the goddamn music and get a decent job. Maybe, she can act a bit better now because she saw that I'm finally looking for a decent job according to her own perception.
"I don't know, mom." I reply. "I'm being quite busy these days and I can't promise you anything."
"Silene?" Juan voice interrupts us.
In the moment when I've seen my mother, I immediately turned of the headphone, thing that probably panicked Juan really bad and brought him till here to see what's going on.
I turn to look at him and, finally, my mother releases my hand.
"They need you downstairs." he says in a serious voice.
"Oh, making friends already?" my mother intrudes as always.
Thanks God she didn't asked me who's this handsome guy, but, by looking at her, I'm pretty sure she's thinking about it.
"We're not friends." I tell her, then I take my cart and get ready to follow Juan to the elevator. "I'm sorry, but I have to go."
"Yes, my dear." she says and I feel like I'm about to throw up. "Take care and please call me as soon as you can."
I always hated when she acted all nice when other people were around.
"I will, mom." I'm looking desperate at Juan who seems like he's having a shock. "Bye!"
My mother waves at us while we get in the elevator. Only when the doors close after us, I can finally let out a relived sigh. That was it, the hardest day at work ever.
I'm still trying to calm myself, several minutes after the surprise encounter with my painful past. For some it might've appeared as something normal and, probably, it wouldn't have affected them, but I guess I'm not strong enough yet.
I'm sitting in the car with Juan who's holding my hand, caressing it with his thumb, trying to help me calm down. But, I don't think it'll be that easy.
The apparently insignificant meeting made all my wounds suddenly bleed. Even some past memories that I believed were deeply buried inside my soul, succeeded to get out and haunt me.
It's funny when you think that a thirty years old woman who's robbing stores and stealing art is afraid of her mother, but this is the truth. A sad truth, indeed, but before becoming a robber, I was once a helpless child abused by this person who birthed me. The beatings, the insults and the traumas that she left on me can't be compared to anything that I've lived in my thief career.
Back then, when I was a kid I couldn't oppose her. I guess this thing is reflected in my behavior even now as I talked to her as normally as possible instead of telling her what a bitch she was and run.
"Silene?" Juan says a bit concerned. "I want you to be okay. Please, just tell me how can I help you."
Ever since we got out of the hotel and I quickly told him what happened, all he did was tried to make me feel better. At some point, I started to feel even worse because I couldn't calm and, probably, I was transmitting my state to him too.
"Juan, I'm fine." I lie. "I'm okay, nothing happened."
"Then why are your legs shaking?" he asks gently touching my thigh.
"I don't know." I give up. "I'm sorry. I'll be okay."
"Silene, listen to me." he continues while caressing my legs. "She has no power over you. By panicking now you're showing that she can still control you and you only give her satisfaction indirectly."
"I'm trying." I sigh.
He's right about it. The last thing I want to do is give my mother even more power than she had. So, I take a deep breath and try to focus on something else. For example, the fact that I told Juan about my pregnancy.
He hasn't felt affected by it, on the contrary, ever since he heard he looks like he can barely control his joy.
"Oh, here there are! The reason of our waiting!" Juan exclaims indicating me two silhouettes approaching the car. "The prodigal sons."
I laugh. Juan was always making me feel better, but even without him, the two guys are really funny. I'm not sure if they're drunk or just acting, but they hold onto each other half dancing half walking while Rodrigo is laughing out loud. At least some of us had a great time tonight.
"Hi babes!" Rodrigo screams while jumping in, next to us. "How are you?"
"We're good." Juan says trying to make some space for me. "I can see that you got a bit overboard with the alcohol."
"Bullshit!" Rodrigo exclaims. "It was just a bottle."
"Just a bottle?" I say raising an eyebrow.
"To the club!" he tells the Serbian driver, then he turns to me. "Yes, Silene, but that doesn't even matters anymore. Congratulations guys!"
"For what?" Juan asks perplexed.
"Oh, don't act so shy." Rodrigo giggles. "Silene is pregnant we heard it all."
I roll my eyes. Apparently, the night is getting even worse than I thought.
He jumps over Juan and catches me in a tight hug.
"I can't believe I'm gonna be an uncle!" Rodrigo says while kissing my cheeks. "Thank you! I thought I'll never see the day."
I don't know what to reply to this, so I just laugh, while Juan is trying to put him back to his seat.
"You know, Silene, he always seemed the type of guy that will never have a stable relationship, not to talk about kids." Rodrigo continues. "But here it is, finally it's happening!"
"Rodrigo, I don't need the mother in law attitude right now." Juan says in a plain voice.
"Yes, I know, you just met her." he replies. "I'm sorry guys."
I can't believe they had access to our entire conversations and when I thought it won't appear, here it is:
"So, Silene, what are you gonna give Juan after losing the bet?"
"That's not your business." Juan replies.
"Oh, guys, you're so stiff again, you definitely need some sex."
Maybe he's right, but there's a small problem. We haven't had sex after what happened in Rome. I'm not sure if it was like an unwritten non agression pact or something, but Juan kept a decent distance all the nights and proffered only to hold me while sleeping without trying to do anything else.
"Rodrigo, how about you share us a bit from your experiences." I say, but by judging by Juan's look I just did the biggest mistake of my life.
"Well, babe, first of all this is something you won't understand, but..." he changes his voice and now Rodrigo sounds like a diva. "My sex life is amazing. Comparing to yours I'm Niagara Falls while you're the Sahara desert. So, take some notes from here, first of all you have to take care of the dick, I mean..."
At this point I'm not even listening to him anymore. He's playing like a tape in the background thinking that I'm taking notes on how to improve my sexual life. I'm actually looking on the window, fascinated by the flashing lights that are shining around. It's almost impossible for me to see any details of the buildings because of the speed, yet I'm enjoying this ride and the small moment that I have to clear my thoughts.
They all laugh, even the driver, yet I was too spaced out to hear why. I just turn to them and try to fake some amusement, so that I won't make Juan feel bad.
"Are you okay?" he asks.
"Yes, better." and I wasn't lying, the few minutes spent alone while watching the city lights really helped me. "I'm fine now."
"I wanted to ask you if I can go to the club with Rodrigo and Alonso too." he says. "I need to talk with his dad a bit."
"Yes, sure." I say happy that I'll have some more time alone.
"Thank you." he kisses me on the top of my head. "I'll be back to you as soon as possible."
"Don't worry about me, please, just solve your businesses out there."
And for the first time in my life I wasn't curious about what he's going to talk with Rodrigo's father or what are they doing there. I guess I was too preoccupied by what happened to me today to be able to focus on something else. But, in order to be able to get back on track I really have to fix the problems I have with my past and not let them affect me in the future.
The car stops in front of an enormous villa, similar to Juan's house, but even more luxurious. Apparently, it was a private club, regularly visited by Rodrigo's father and the rest of the elite of Madrid.
I'm not even upset that Juan hasn't invited me to come with him, for me it's a relief, but I think that he felt me. The change was quite huge. From the nosy person that I used to be, now I'm weirdly silent and compliant to the entire situation. Obviously that I'll want to meet Rodrigo's dad and even get implied in their heist if possible, but not now, maybe later after I'll figure out a way to order my personal issues.
Juan gets out with the guys, but not before kissing me deeply and whispering how much he loves me.
I'm being left only with the Serbian driver who, luckily is silent.
The street is empty and silent, covered in the dark cloak of the night. The only noise is coming from the club from where, sometimes you can hear the people laughing or clinking their glasses in a toast.
I put my hands on my invisible womb. Deciding to bring a child into this world is something worth celebrating and even if I hate it, maybe I'll have to ask Juan to meet with the guys and hold a sort of dinner party something.
Rodrigo was too excited about it and I guess I was a bit cold to him, but my attitude is coming just from the fact that things are still new to me. So, I'll have to adapt and try to do my best. After all they did for us, Rodrigo and Alonso deserve at least a decent dinner.
The sound of an engine wakes me up from the spiral of thoughts that made me feel like I'm out of this word for a few moments. Then, as fast as it came, the noise stops.
I turn to look at Tatiana getting out of her car. The sound of her high heels hitting the pavement indicates me that she's angrier than I thought.
"Hi, Silene!" she says waving at me.
But I don't get to do anything because she opens the door and jumps in the seat next to me.
"How are you?" Tatiana asks kissing my cheeks. "Are you okay?"
The smell of her perfume hits me. Roses and bergamot, something way too hard for my pregnant senses.
"Yes, I'm fine." I say smiling trying not to think of the new wave of nausea that just hits me. "You?"
"I'm good." she's obviously lying. "I came to see my man."
"Are you two okay?" I ask.
"We'll be or we'll split up." Tatiana replies casually. "But don't worry about me. How are you? Have you took the pill?"
She takes my hands in hers and I'm still shocked by the care this woman always showed me.
"About that..." I'm not even sure how to formulate it. "I decided not to take it."
"So, you're keeping it?" she smiles.
"I think so." I'm trying to seem happy even if I'm still a bit confused.
"Then, congratulations!" she exclaims.
She hugs me without asking anything else and I'm grateful for that. Tatiana was never too intruding and I guess she was functioning on the principle — I don't ask about you and you don't ask about me.
"Tatiana!" Juan says socked in the moment when he opens the door.
"I guess we'll see each other around." Tatiana tells me while getting out of the car. "It was nice seeing you, Silene."
"Andrés is waiting for you." Juan is trying to sound official, but this is quickly followed by a short laugh.
"He can suck my dick." Tatiana replies casually and I have to cover my mouth in an attempt not to laugh. "But, Thank you for telling me, Juan. And congratulations."
She kisses him on the cheeks and then turns to wave at me one more time. I'm still amused by Tatiana as I never heard her talking like that and I'm also wondering what her husband could've done to make her speak such "nice" things about him.
"She'd be very proud of you." I hear her telling Juan. "And so am I too. Please take care of her, okay?"
"Yes, I will." he says looking at me with admiration. "I promise I'll do my best."
"Bring her to the villa, and take a short break, please." Tatiana sounds a bit concerned. "If you decided to keep it she needs to take care of herself too and the lifestyle that you're currently having might affect your child."
"She won't want." Juan laughs nervously. "Silene had it hard she won't see that it's a problem from her point of view."
"At least tell her." she whispers. "But, no matter what, always be attentive to her."
"I will, thank you." he says.
They say goodbye to each other and Juan enters in the car.
He kisses me then he takes my hand in his and tells something in Serbian to our driver.
"Where are we going?" I ask smiling.
"Our night hasn't ended." he grins. "You'll find out soon."
I can't believe that he's the one who's having another surprise for me when, according to our bet, I should be the one doing something for him. But Juan is Juan and no matter how hard I'll try, I'll never be able to give him something as meaningful as all the things he was offering me. So, I just close my eyes, fully embracing the next beautiful memory that's about to begin. I have a feeling that it'll surely remain in my soul among the nicest things that I've ever shared with him.