CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
ADELAIDE
I sit on the top of my tree as I squint my eyes to see the Greenie. I didn't go to the Box as the Greenie alarm blared, unfortunately, for the first time of my amnesiac life, reminding me pointedly about my inability to find the way out of the Maze.
I am so incapable, that it takes me like almost a month to get to be a Runner and when I've finally became one, I get insomniac or I have too much of nightmares to sleep properly. I literally have to push myself to get out of the bed every morning. There is this huge weight of exhaustion over my bones that is making me sick to the stomach and I wonder how much I can carry on like this before my body snaps.
And my nightmares?
Whenever I've asked Stan or Chuck about their memories, they always say that all they've seen are snippets and blurred images.
Minho had seen the faces of a woman and a little girl- he thinks that they are his mother and sister.
And Frypan had seen little snippets of him playing or studying with a boy and in a school.
No one even remotely has had dreams like me. Wheat I get almost every night are vivid scenes from my past life- sometimes I'm seeing it as a first person and sometimes as the third but all the times it is equally horrifying and traumatizing.
I've seldom had normal dreams. It gets so so scary that I have to scream myself awake. And one time, Newt had to wake me up because I was screaming so badly.
Since that day, Newt has always offered me his help and asked me to open up and share my problems with him but I didn't. I can't.
How can I tell him that my memories from past life are tortures? How can I tell him that my dad punched the hell out of me? How can I tell him that my mother is probably dead?
What if he thinks that my memories are riddled with pain and so much suffering because I might have been a horrible person and that I might have deserved this? I can't exactly blame him if he thinks that I was a bad person in my past life and hence so much tortures, because, I myself think so.
I know how to conceal myself. I've quite managed to convince Newt that I'm perfectly fine and well. I know how to check my emotions. I keep it so secure, that even I sometimes can't figure it out myself.
I watch as Gally reaches out to open the metal gates. Chuck and Stan are talking. Maybe Stan is congratulating him on his promotion from Greenie.
I see the boys throw down the rope to get the Greenie out. I can make out the boys pull the Greenie out.
The Greenie.
From this far away, I can see him wearing a sea blue t-shirt and ochre cargo pants. He has a tense posture as the spins around, taking the notice of the huge walls that surrounds us.
Suddenly, he breaks through the crowd and dashes out. I raise my eyebrows at the speed with which he is running across the Glade, leaving behind the hollers and mocking laughter from the crowd.
The boy has wavy tar black hair that ruffles as he runs. Suddenly, he stumbles and goes tumbling down on the ground, face-planting.
I laugh. Me and the whole Glade.
This is an interesting guy.
He scrambles up as Alby and Newt approaches him. Ready to do the 'Welcome to the Glade' shit for god-knows how many time. The crowd disperses slowly and I begin climbing down knowing that I have to go to the Med-jack hut.
NEWT
"Pal, you gotta tell her someday." Minho says as he tosses me a green apple.
I give a long sigh, as I bit into the apple, my mouth immediately filling with its sweet, juicy contents.
"I really want to. But maybe she doesn't like me like that. Maybe it's all just platonic." I say as I hope to get Minho off this topic. He's been bugging me for days.
Minho gives a dirty look as he drops himself beside me. "You are shucking jacked in the head for saying that. She likes you. Like like, like you."
"She's still upset about the whole nightmare things. She tries so bloody hard to convince me that she's perfectly fine but I know she's not. She's just pretending. I don't think it's the right time." I mumble.
"Look, we really can't understand what she's going through. I still wonder how she's still functioning Though. She looks like she is going to drop anytime. She looks so exhausted."
"I've asked her so many times." I grit my teeth, getting irritated remembering her attitude.
"She's very stubborn, I know, but if she's not opening her, then you can't do anything else. All we can do is to make sure that she's happy and not thinking about her nightmares much." Minho says as he picks on the grasses.
I can see that she is happy. I see her eyes sparkling with child-like amusement when she stretches with Minho in front of the Doors or shows off her archery skills to Minho. I see her knackered and ready to crash on the bed as she comes back to the Glade, but she looks that she is contended.
I think she is more free when she is out of the Glade than into the Glade.
I can see why she was so adamant in being a Runner and now I'm glad that she got to be one. Though, I can't help but worry for her.
"I don't want out friendship to get destroyed because of this." I wiggle my toes.
"Your friendship can survive this little crush of yours." Minho sits cross-legged and turns towards me.
Crush?
I like how she trusts me. I know that she is scared. She is scared to trust people. But I love that she trusts me. I love to listen her hum softly while she is in the shower. I've practically memorized her hum and sometimes, I hum with her too.
"How can, oh Mr. Love Expert, my friendship can survive this little crush of mine?" I raise my eyebrows. Minho rolls his eyes, a smirk playing on his lips.
"Just tell her how you feel."
I give a long sigh, "Thanks for making it worse, mate."
"Why?"
"If I tell her, then she will think that I might want to get into a relationship."
"And .... Why would she think like that?" Minho tilts his head, smirking, knowing exactly why but still wanting to hear it from me.
"Because, I.." I trail off, not really wanting to say it aloud. I drum my fingers on the ground, feeling a little warm. It was not so warm a little while ago.
"Because you?" Minho presses me, smirking widely.
"Oh come on you bloody slinthead!" I groan, glaring at him, "I know you know it!"
"I still wanna hear it."
"I will kill you."
"I want to hear you say it, Newt."
"Because I ... I think ...I think that I'm in love with her."
"What?!"
"Just a little bit." I bring my thumb and my index finger close.
"Oh, I didn't really know this, pal." Minho says laughing, "Newtie-Patootie is whipped for good!"
I slap the boy on the back of his head. Hard. "Ow!"
"But shank," Minho says rubbing the spot on his head, "That girl has gone through a lot, okay and I see the way she looks at you. If you are actually serious about her then tell her that. Don't wait and don't break her heart."
I didn't know that Minho could be so protective of Addie.
When I didn't see Addie among the crowd earlier today, waiting for Greenie, my eyes instinctively flicked to her tree in the Deadheads. As I expected, I saw her perched on the branch, picking her nails.
I understand that she doesn't want to talk much with others. I understand that her nightmares are affecting her deeply and her stubbornness is making things worse.
I adamant on making things right for her.
TOTAL WORDS-1340
A/N:
finally! thomas is here! (rubs hands excitedly)
and newt finally soughts out his feelings for adelaide!
please vote/comment if you've liked this chapter, your support means a lot