Humanity ; a virtue associated with basic ethics of altruism derived from the human condition ; it's what keeps us going. It's the underlying force that stops us from completely giving up on everyone and everything.
Love. Hope. Respect. Fear. Anger. Hate. Sadness.
As a society, it's the driving force behind our actions. Whether our choices are rational or not, our humanity is what defines us. From the moment of our existence, humanity has been with us. It's a part of everyone's journey through life. It makes us, and breaks us.
Throughout history, humanity has been classified as one of six virtues that is constant in all cultures. But, even with all of this, it seems as though our one defining trait is our numbness to the world ; our lack of desire to suffer.
I felt nothing. Before, I know I would've done anything to feel happy, relieved. I used to cry myself to sleep at times because of my humanity. I used to worry about hurting others around me because of my humanity. I thought that there wasn't anything better than feeling, than love, but I was wrong.
Nothing felt better than the eternal silence inside of me.
There was no guilt, no sadness, no pain. I was free to do whatever I wanted without having to deal with the repercussions.
I leaned back against the smooth porcelain that surrounded me, shutting my eyes as I let out a heavy sigh, the steam of the hot water I lied in, filling my lungs. I couldn't remember the last time that I just got to take a bath, that I got time to relax on my own, without having anything to worry about, and it felt like it had taken a toll on my body, though I knew that it technically couldn't have.
A small smirk formed on my lips when I heard the door to the bedroom open up, the sound of footsteps nearing the bathroom, one by one, and then I heard his voice ; Klaus.
"You want to explain to me why it is that I found the postman bleeding out in shrubs?"
"Because I didn't feel like burying him." I dryly retorted, before snapping my eyes open. "Oh! That reminds me, I left your mail in the kitchen."
He sighed, kneeling down beside me. "You can't just leave bodies around the house,"
"Why?" I questioned, my smirk growing as I leaned up to him. "Is your mommy gonna be mad?" I couldn't stop myself from bursting into laughter at the look on his face, giggling as I leaned back into the tub.
The person in the coffin that was sealed shut was his mother, somehow preserved even after her death, and she was back to reunite the family. Every single sibling that had been once daggered and carted around in coffins by Klaus, was awakened last night after dinner.
"Last time I checked, this is my house just as much as it is yours," I pointed out, stretching my arms out along the edges of the tub. "which means I get to do whatever I want, whenever I want, and not a single one of your siblings, and especially not your mother, is gonna get in my way, sweetheart. Now," I said, standing up in the tub. "mind handing me a towel?"
Klaus looked up at me, staring speechlessly, and if I had any feelings, I swore that I'd never felt more sexy, more womanly with the way he was looking at me. His eyes darkened, gaze holding onto mine as he stood up, meeting me. I may not have had any love for him in that moment, but there was nothing that could ever fizzle out my attraction to Klaus Mikaelson, and maybe now, I could finally act on it.
"Nik!" A familiar voice that I hadn't heard in weeks called out ; Rebekah. She stormed into the bedroom, halting when she caught sight of me. Her lips pursed, brows raising as she neared the doorway. "Heh, I'm starting to see what all the fuss is about you."
"Out, Rebekah!" Klaus snapped at her, before tossing me a towel.
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I sat on the couch downstairs in the family room, having my nails polished with Rebekah who sat beside me. Across from the two of us stood Kol - one of the once daggered siblings - before a full length mirror, staring at himself while a tailor adjusted his suit. He seemed to be Rebekah and I's age, and according to her, was the most reckless of the group.
To the other side of me were Elijah and another brother, named Finn, who seemed to be the eldest of them all. The boys all had darker colored hair, leaving Rebekah to be the only blonde, though they were all equally as strikingly beautiful, strong features.
"Rebekah?" The youngest brother asked, looking at his sister through the mirror's reflection. "Tell me how handsome I am."
Everyone in the room was getting ready for the ball tonight, that their mother was throwing as a way to start fresh in Mystic Falls. She'd invited nearly the entire town, including Elena which I figured would be interesting, considering she'd daggered Rebekah.
"Ah Kol, you know I can't be compelled." She dryly responded, making me laugh.
"Lyssa?" He questioned, turning to face me now. "What about you? What do you think?"
I laughed, glancing down at my nails before looking back up at the original. "I think I shouldn't say anything," I playfully remarked. "don't wanna make your ego any bigger than it already is."
"Oh that's not the only thing about me that's big, darling - "
"Kol!" Rebekah shouted, interrupting him, though he seemed entirely unfazed. "Gross!"
I glanced over at Rebekah, before looking back up at Kol, giggling. "Humble brag." I smiled, as he shot me a wink.
Suddenly, Klaus swiftly walked into the room. "You went after Elena?" He questioned Rebekah, stopping in front of her. "What is wrong with you?!"
I raised my brows, glancing back over at Rebekah. She'd gone after Elena? If I had any emotions, I would've been worried, would've been pissed at Rebekah, but why should I be? Elena had it coming.
And why did Klaus care about what happened to Elena? It surely wasn't because he cared about my family members, probably just because he needed her blood for more hybrids.
"Here we go."
"Do you want another dagger in your heart?" Klaus threatened, to which she simply rolled her eyes, unamused by her older brother.
"Again with the dagger threats?" Kol spoke up in her defense. "Don't you have any other tricks?"
"Oh, go back to staring at yourself." Klaus retorted, glancing back at his brother.
"And who are you," Kol continued. "my father?"
"No, Kol," The hybrid responded, turning to face his little brother. "but you're in my house."
"Then perhaps we should go outside."
They stared one another down for a moment, before someone else spoke up, entering the room. "Enough!" A woman - Esther, I realized - snapped at them. When she walked into the room, it was easy to see the power she held over them. "You must be Lyssa," Her eyes flickered past her sons, to me. "the girl that's in love with my son."
I glanced over at Klaus, who was watching me, curious as to how I'd react. I wanted to tell her that I was more than just a girl that had been in love with her psychotic son, but I also knew that Klaus had always wanted his family reunited, and so I decided to play along for now, and put on my fakest of smiles, standing up.
"It's nice to meet you, Esther." I offered her my not-yet-manicured hand, and she took it.
"Likewise."
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Rebekah and I were walking downtown, to The Grill, an invitation in her hand. I quickly snatched it from her, nosily flipping it over to read who it was for. "Matt Donovan?" I scoffed, glancing over at her. "You could do so much better."
She glared at me, snatching the invitation back from me. "Not everyone wants to date a psychopath."
"Okay, for your information, I'm not dating your brother." I pointed out, as we turned a corner, nearing the bar.
"Really?" The blonde questioned, noticeably not believing me. "Is that why I found you naked in his bathroom this morning?"
"He walked in on me." I replied, defensively. "Trust me, we're not dating. We haven't even slept together - "
"Ugh, good. Don't sleep with him." She said in disgust, as we reached the bar.
"Why not?" I asked, opening up the door for us, greeted by the smell of booze and fried food upon entering.
"You could do so much better." She replied, mimicking me from earlier, making me smile.
Walking into The Grill, we found Elena and Caroline, sitting at a table. "Elena, when you and Matt kissed for the first time freshman year, you called me the second it happened." Caroline said, not noticing us. "And now I don't hear about this til now, and from somebody else."
Typical, I thought. Elena kept everyone out of the loop, though she made sure to put herself in everyone else's business.
"I'm sorry." Elena breathed out. "It's just I, I don't even know how I feel about it yet. All I do know is that it just used to be so much easier."
"Careful Caroline." Rebekah and I walked over to them. "It's all well and good until she stabs you in the back."
"What are you doing here?" Elena questioned. "I know your mom's rules. No hurting the locals."
"Get over yourself Elena." The blonde original coolly responded. "It's not all about you."
I snickered, watching as she walked off to go to the bar to find Matt, leaving me with Elena and Caroline.
"So you're friends with her now?" Elena spoke up, before I turned to look at her.
"Is that a problem, Elena?" I questioned. "Is there anyone else you don't want me hanging out with?"
She had constantly told me not to be with Damon, to avoid him, instead of supporting me when I needed her. And now? Now, she was falling in love with him, like he could do no wrong. She was a complete hypocrite, a parody of herself. Everybody that I loved and accepted into my life was no good for me - no, they were only good for her.
"She tried to kill me - "
"And Damon killed Jeremy, but that didn't stop you, did it?" I smirked, narrowing my eyes on her. "Tell me, Elena, which brothers the better kisser?"
"Lyssa!" Caroline hissed at me, Elena's eyes growing wider with shock.
"You think I didn't know?" I asked, scoffing. "God, Elena I saw it. Next time you wanna make out with your boyfriend's brother, don't do it on the front porch." I glanced over my shoulder, spotting Rebekah finishing up talking to Matt. "See you tonight, sis."
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The mansion was bustling with partygoers, and music, the whole event was nothing short of luxurious and over-the-top, which was exactly what I'd expected from the family, always doing everything to the extremes. It was like they all had this desire to prove themselves to everyone, something I'd recognized in Klaus first, always buying me the most expensive things, always going above and beyond to show me - and others - all that he was capable of offering, like it made him better.
I stepped out into the hall, walking to the staircase in a dress that I'd found laid out for me, along with a diamond necklace that glistened in glimmered under the lights along with my off white colored dress, covered in crystals. I came to a halt at the staircase, staring out at the guests below me, all turning to get a look at me ; Elena, the Salvatores, every human and vampire, and yet the only person I noticed was the man that was waiting for me at the very end of the stairs.
The scene reminded me all too much of the Miss Mystic pageant, except instead of running back up and away, I walked down to Klaus like I was walking down the aisle of my wedding, hell - I was pretty sure that if Klaus was waiting on the other side for me, I'd walk to my death just the same.
I may not have had any of my emotions - stripped like a bare canvas of everything that made me who I was - but my attraction to the hybrid could never be taken away, which seemed to be the root of every one of the problems I'd once had.
They all started when a charming stranger, with an accent that made everything sound good, walked into my life, somehow showing me heaven and hell all at once.
___________________________
All of the Mikaelsons had gathered on the staircase, including Esther, to address the guests. "Welcome," Elijah began. "thank you for joining us. You know, whenever my mother brings our family together like this, it's tradition for us to commence the evening with a dance." My eyes flickered up to Klaus, who's gaze rested on mine, lips curving into a faint smirk. "Tonight's pick is a centuries-old waltz, so if all of you could please find yourselves a partner, please join us in the ballroom."
A boring old waltz was the last way I wanted to dance, briefly reminiscing on that certain night in Chicago when Stefan, Klaus and I had gone to a bar. That was a night I wanted to relive, and remake, thoughts that I'd revisited plenty of sleepless nights since.
As people began to disperse around me, searching for a partner, I spun around to step aside, waiting for my partner to descend the staircase, watching Damon and Elena across the foyer.
The dark haired Salvatore offered my sister his hand, and she let out a deep breath, before taking it and following him to the ballroom.
Behind they left Stefan, who clenched his jaw, noticeably hurt, and I couldn't understand why I felt so bewitched to walk over and sweep him away for myself. So I did.
Before Klaus could get to me, I had walked over to Stefan, taking his hand. "Dance with me." I said, not giving him much of a choice in following me to the ballroom.
A triumphant smirk formed on my lips when I noticed Damon and Elena staring at Stefan and I step into the room, leading us to stand beside Matt and Rebekah.
I didn't understand my sister. She loved Stefan so deeply, I knew that, that was what I could understand. But what was confusing to me, was how she could just drop him like he hadn't spent the entire summer with Klaus for her.
Damon was even worse. Stefan had given up Elena, his entire life, the years that he'd spent working on his control, and he had the audacity to make out with Elena.
The cherry on top of it all was that he supposedly still had feelings for me. Was that why he hadn't said a word to me all day? He found out the girl that he claimed to love had shut off her humanity, and he was dancing with her sister.
The dance began, and I hadn't much of an idea of the steps, but following Stefan was easy. He gently placed his hand to my waist, one of my hands moving to his broad shoulders, lifting my head to look up at him.
"You know," I finally spoke up. "for someone that hates dancing as much as you do, you're good at this."
He chuckled, though it looked like he wanted nothing more than to leave and hide away. We fell into a silence for a few more steps, and for the first time that day, I didn't really have anything to say.
"You look beautiful." Stefan softly said, gingerly running the pad of his thumb over my hand, and it was something that I had been waiting for, for over a year ; for him to notice me.
Too bad it was too late.
"Thank you."
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I leaned over the sink of the bathroom that I stood in, looking into the mirror as I coated on a thin layer of lipgloss, smoothing the slippery product over my lips, when I suddenly heard the sound of someone clinking their glass.
"Good Evening, Ladies and Gentleman." I heard the sound of Esther's voice, and decided I was going to head back to the foyer.
I spun around, picking up the length of my dress to step over my snack that was currently bleeding out all over the tiles. I stepped out, and rejoined everyone in the foyer, where waiters were coming around to every guest, offering champagne.
"..I invite you all to join me in raising a glass." Esther announced, standing at the staircase, as I moved to stand beside Rebekah who'd gotten me a glass of champagne. "It provides me with no greater joy then to see my family back together as one. I'd like to thank you all for being part of this spectacular evening. Cheers!"
"Cheers!"
"Cheers." I said, lifting my glass to Rebekah who did the same, a small smile forming on her lips, before both of us took a sip of the red tinged champagne.
In an instant, I felt someone's strong hand wrap around my forearm, tugging me away ; Klaus. "You really think it's appropriate to be man-handling me in front of everyone?" I hissed, yanking out of his grasp.
"Do you really think it's appropriate to be feeding on the guests?" He quickly responded, in a hushed tone. "You're sloppy. There's blood on your dress." I glanced down to the side of my dress where his gaze had fallen, noticing a line of blood. "It's one thing for the mayor to know what we are, it's another for the entire town mob to descend upon us."
I found it so ironic that he - out of everyone - was worried about me getting caught, when he was the one who told me to turn off my humanity. He knew the way a vampire acted without their emotions.
And who cared if the whole town found out about vampires? What could they do against the original family? Nothing.
I rolled my eyes, walking past him to leave, when he caught my arm once more, spinning me around to face him. "Don't you roll your eyes at me," Klaus stated, stern and cold, capturing my gaze. "I'm trying to save your ungrateful little afterlife. I may have been the one to rid you of your humanity," My eyes flickered away from his for a moment, spotting a waiter headed towards us with another tray of champagne. "but I swear to you Lyssa, I will give you something to feel if you - "
In an instant, I was behind the waiter, ripping into the soft skin of his neck. The tray dropped from his hands, glasses of liquor shattering onto the floor, a shriek escaping him, as everyone turned to look at me. I pulled my fangs out of his neck, letting him fall to the ground, before looking up at everyone who was watching me in horror, their eyes wide with shock.
"Lyssa," Stefan stepped towards me, but my eyes shifted away from his over to Klaus.
"Now," I breathed out, retracting my fangs and I swore that in that moment he wished he'd never turned me, that he'd let me die as I was supposed to that night last spring. "what were you saying about my ungrateful little afterlife?"
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I stepped out of my house later that night, after having showered and changed into a tight, and tiny black sequined dress that was sure to get me all the attention - and blood - that I wanted.
Men are so easy, I thought to myself. All you had to do was show a little interest, wear a short skirt, and they were yours for the taking. They were like children, running to the newest, shiniest toy, and after they dulled her out, they'd leave her to look for something - someone - else, but tonight they were going to be my toys, my playthings to feed off of, and toss away.
And perhaps they deserved it for being so easy, for so easily falling prey to anything that walked on two long, bare legs ; the thing that would get them killed.
I walked down the front stairs, stopping halfway down the walkway when I found someone waiting outside ; the one man that I fell prey to so easily.
A few feet away, parked on the side of the street was a motorcycle, Stefan Salvatore leaning against it with his arms crossed over his chest, watching me.
But, he couldn't be there to see me, I thought. I mean, why would he be?
"Elena's not home." I told him, not sure where my sister had gone after I left the ball, not really caring if she'd so much as fallen off the face of the earth.
"I came to see you," Stefan said, peaking my interest. "what you did back at the ball.."
"You're here to babysit me." I interrupted, realizing where he was going.
"The opposite, actually." He pointed out, my brows knitting, curious and confused as I took a step towards him, shoving my hands into the pockets of my leather jacket. "Look, I know what it's like to have your switch flipped. You wanna have a good time, but the problem with a dance is, too many witnesses. You gotta go somewhere a little more private for some real fun."
"Oh, yeah? Where?"
"Oh, I know this little dive bar off the beaten path." He pointed out, picking up the helmet that was sitting atop of the motorcycle's seat. "Come on."
When I shut off my humanity, it allowed me to read everyone so much easier, not polluted with my own feelings, or issues, but somehow Stefan Salvatore was a puzzle to me. I couldn't understand why he'd want to take me out, to relive a part of his life that he'd tried so hard to fight, to hide.
I thought that maybe it was a trick, maybe he was lying to somehow trigger my emotions back on, but I risked it all anyway, walking over and taking the helmet he offered me.
And so I got on the back of his bike, and rode off into the night, like a scene in one of those cliche angsty teen movies, where the girl sneaks out late at night to meet up with her older boyfriend that her father never approved of, except the reality of it for me was that Stefan was my sister's, and I didn't give a damn about anything.
A/N - so basically no-humanity Lyssa is an overly-sexualized, feminist on crack that Klaus is already soooooooo over having to deal with lmao. I had sooooo much fun writing this chapter, because I kept thinking of what she could do or say to take things too far. Some characters weren't aware of her having shut it off in the beginning of the chapter, such as Elijah which now he knows, and honestly I've been thinking of his and lyssa's relationship and idk if I'm gonna make them a couple anymore, just bc sis doesn't need to get with every character ever, but also I just love him and Hayley. They'll definitely have some cute moments tho, I promise. But at least for rn, I see them just as friends even tho I know I said they're gonna be like a full blown couple. Sorrrryyyyy my ideas are constantly changing!!! I can't help it!!!!!
But, I wanna know - out of curiosity - who do you guys ship lyssa with?
As always, thanks for reading and sorry for any possible typos/errors!