Jillian Klairo
Nang imulat ko ang mga mata ko nang sumunod na araw ay sumalubong sa akin ang may kadiliman na paligid. Hindi ako makagalaw dahil pakiramdam ko ay may nakalingkis sa akin, may nakasiksik din sa leeg ko. I groaned inwardly as I tried to decipher what's happening. There are veiny forearms around my waists, my blurry vision wandered up, to his corded muscled arm and finally, his stubbled jawline. 'Yon lang nakikita ko dahil nakasubsob ang mukha niya sa leeg ko. His stubbles were tickling my skin.
Sandali kong nahigit ang hininga ko. Basically ay nakalingkis sa akin si Creed. Holy shit.
What do I do?! Do I wake him up?! Ang sama naman noon dahil payapa ang tulog niya, pero gusto ko siya! Syempre parang sasabog ang puso ko kasi yakap niya ako. At higit sa lahat gusto din siya ng pepe ko....oo, inaamin ko na...I am aching and hot for this man..and us being close like this is not helping at all!
But of course, I am not going to wake him up like a mean bitch. Hinga Jillian.
Sinubukan kong gumalaw upang abutin ang aking salamin sa nighstand sa gawi ko pero noong gumalaw ako ay humigpit ang kanyang hawak, causing me to move mt body closer to his. Napasinghap ako nang tumusok sa pwetan ko ang morning wood niya or in scientific term Nocturnal penile tumescence. It's an erection that happens when men are asleep, it can happen to women too, pero ang tumitindig sa atin ang ay clitoris and it's not that so much of an issue, unlike men's.
I am a med student. I study anatomy, body parts and reaction, so I can rationalize his erection...but I can't stop myself from reacting...my vagina throbbed...and my nipples erected. Napalunok ako.
Jusko lord, help me.
"Hmm.." He groaned and pressed a hot kiss on my neck.
OH. MY. Why did he do that?!
"You smell so good." His morning voice rumbled and pressed another kiss. Nang dumungaw ako sa kanya ay nakapikit pa din ang mga mata niya. He's still asleep. Oh, my. What is he dreaming about?!
"C-Creed.." My voice shook as I called his name. I cannot take this anymore. I shook him a little so he would wake up. "Creed.." I called him again...slowly, he opened his eyes, it took him a minute until he realized the position we're in.
His sexy mouth parted and moved away from me in milliseconds. I took a sigh of relief inwardly as he put distance between us. Nagkatinginan kami sandali bago niya inabot ang unan sa likod niya at inilagay iyon sa kanyang kandungan. Covering what I already saw and felt.
Mabilis kong inabot ang salamin ko at isunuot iyon, trying to hide my blush, but I knew he saw it. He cleared his throat. I can feel his warmth radiating.
"I'm s-sorry..I didn't mean to hold you like that."
Mabilis akong umiling at lumingon sa kanya.
"It's okay..I am comfortable with you..." Deretsong sagot ko. A smile with gladness curved his lips. But should I tell him what he did while he was sleep-talking?
"There's something else, is it?" Tanong niya na animo'y nabasa niya ang mukha ko.
Lumunok ako bago dahan-dahan akong tumango.
"Y-you kissed me h-here.." Turo ko sa leeg ko.
Namilog ang kanyang mga mata.
"I'm s-sorry."
Don't be, because I liked it...but of course, I shut my mouth and just told him it was alright since he didn't know.
He just nodded.
"Thank you for staying with me.."
He smiled genuinely, kahit na gulo-gulo ang kanyang buhok ay gwapo pa din siya. Kaasar. Tumikhim siya at tumayo na, he dropped the pillow and so I saw the huge tent on his pants.
"It's morning wood!" Mabilis niyang sagot. "I swear." Dagdag pa niya at inabot ang unan.
I chuckled.
"I know, it's natural and we're both adults who study the human body, so don't worry about i-it." Sagot ko at tumikhim.
Napangisi naman siya sa akin, bago siya napakamot sa kanyang batok.
"I'll see you outside?" Sabi niya.
Ngumiti ako pabalik.
"Of course."
Agad naman siyang tumalikod dala ang unan at mabilis na lumabas mula sa kwarto. When the door shut, I sagged and laid on the bed.
Oh, universe.
After a few moments, I stood up and did my morning business, including checking my suture, which looks fine, walang trace ng infection. The ointment is definitely helping. This would take a week to dissolve so for now, I would walk around with a white patch on my forehead.
Suot ko pa din ang hoodie at pajamas mula kagabi ay lumabas na ako mula sa kwarto. He's still not here. Nilagpasan ko ang malaking sala. The view is indeed breathtaking. I stopped for a few moments and stared at it, bago ako dumeretso sa malaking kusina kung saan kumpleto ang mga rekados at mga gamit. One thing that I learned about Creed is that he likes fried rice so much and so, ibang version naman ang iluluto ko ngayon. I have to cook extra since he has a big appetite.
I took out the eggs and other ingredients. I chopped and got the pan, after few more minutes ay nakasalang na ang kawali sa stove.
"What are you cooking?" A deep voice just suddenly whispered in my ear. Matapos noon ay naramdaman ko ang mga kamay niya sa aking mga bewang.
Napapikit ako sandali, nang maramdaman ko ang init ng kanyang palad. Universe are you really testing me right now?
"Creed." I breathlessly said his name.
Akala niya ay nagulat lang ako kaya naman tumawa lang siya, pero kumakabog ang dibdib ko. Tuwing lumalapit siya sa akin ay pakiramdam ko ay mauubusan ako nang hininga...he makes my heart flutter and took away my breath with his freaking handsomeness and oozing appeal. Finally, he let me go and walked to my side.
He leaned his hip on the black marble counter. Tumingala naman ako sa kanya. Basa pa ang kanyang buhok, my mouth almost watered. Some of it were hanging on the side of his face. May puting tuwalya na nakasabit sa kanyang leeg. Gamit ang kaliwang kamay ay tinutuyo niya ang kanyang buhok, causing his biceps to pop out from the sleeves of his black v-neck shirt. Tinernuhan niya lamang ito nang puting khakis shorts.
"Jillian, the onions are turning brown--"
Mabilis na lumipat ang mga mata ko sa kawali.
"Oh, r-right!"
Nagpatuloy ako sa pagluluto, buti na lang ay napalitan ng amoy ng ginigisa kong bawang at sibuyas ang natural at panlalaking niyang amoy. It distracts the hell out of me. When I finished cooking, he helped put the food on the table we ate. He looked so grateful...and happy with such a simple recipe. He put away our dishes and then we proceeded with our day.
***
"That was Madison and I when we were ten." Turo niya sa photo album na hawak ko. We're currently in his living room. Nakita ko itong photo album sa ilalim ng side table. He let me skim through, since maaga pa daw para mag-aral.
He looked like he was ten in the picture, nakasimangot siya habang natatabunan ang katawan niya ng puting buhangin. Nakangisi naman si Madison, na naka-bathing suit. She's standing beside Creed. Kulang-kulang ang mga ngipin niya pero she looks really adorable kahit bungi. They have the same skin tone and hair, but other than that, they looked different. I wouldn't have thought that they were twins.
"Where is she?" Tanong ko, nang hindi siya sumagot ay lumingon ako sa kanya. Only to find out that he was staring at me. He didn't even hide it.
"Ang ganda mo." He whispered as he looked me in the eye.
Nahigit ko ang hininga ko. Did he really compliment me without any sarcasm?
"C-Creed."
Ngumisi lang siya.
"What? It was true." Sagot lang niya at hindi na niya ako hinayaang sumagot dahil nagsalita ulit siya. "Madison is in law school a few miles from here." Sabi niya.
Wala sa loob na lumunok at nagbuklat akong muli. I found interesting things about him, like he had his first sip of wine when he was twelve, crashed his first car on a curb when he was sixteen, he loved pasta and rice..basically carbs. He was a manwhore---that's no surprise...and never had an actual girlfriend. We skimmed through the book some more bago namin napagdesisyonan na manood ng movies.
What I mean by movies..is recorded surgeries of Dr. Geioran. We watched it until lunchtime. Nagluto lang ako ng nilagang baboy at gustong-gusto naman niya iyon. Ngayon ay nasa counter kami at kumakain.
"About the rent...how much should I pay?" Tanong ko habang ngumunguya ako. I opened up the topic of the house.
He shrugged and swallowed his food.
"I don't know..maybe thirty pesos?"
Halos masamid naman ako.
"Buti na lang nag-doctor ka, you will suck in business." I replied.
Tumawa siya bago siya sumubo ulit ng gulay. Hinitak niya ang malaking bowl ng sabaw at karne, nagsalin muli sa plato niya. It's his second round, I told you he has a big appetite.
"Magkano nga?" Pamimilit ko.
He shrugged again.
"You decide..but no more than a thousand pesos."
My mouth parted a little bit.
"Creed, that is not fair." Sagot ko. It's not. Sobrang mura.
Seryoso siyang tumingin sa akin.
"That's final."
I sighed and chewed.
"Fine. But I will clean." I insisted.
"No can do, ma'am..I have a cleaning lady that goes in here when we're at school."
"Creed..."
Umiling siya ulit bago niya nilunok ang kinakain niya.
"Uh-uh.."
"Hmm..what other services can I give to make it fair, Mr. Del Russo?" Nang-aasar kong tanong at tinaasan siya ng kilay.
Napatigil siya sa pag-nguya at naibaba niya ang kanyang kutsara. His gaze darted at me as his Adam's apple bobbed.
Agad naman na namula ang aking magkabilang mga pisngi.
"I m-mean, a-ako 'yung magluluto ganoon..I-I didn't mean to sound it like t-that.."
I didn't mean my statement to sound so dirty.
Pero pwede din. My subconscious whispered. I gave myself a mental slap.
Nagpatuloy kami sa pagkain, this time in silence, hindi awkward pero ayoko na ulit magsalita...baka kung ano na naman ang masabi ko. Nang matapos kami ay siya ang nagligpit ng mga pinagkainan. Nang mga bandang hapon ay napag-desisyonan kong pumasok sa study room niya.
Nasabi ko na iyon sa kanya pero sinusundan niya ako.
"Date tayo."
Napatigil naman ako at napatingala sa kanya. I adjusted my glasses.
"Ano?"
Ngumisi siya, ang kapilyuhan ay kumikinang sa kanyang berdeng mga mata.
"Date tayo..inggitin mo yung mga babae sa parke..kasi ang gwapo-gwapo ng date mo." Sagot niya at kinindatan ako.
Napairap na lamang ako at nagpatuloy sa paglalakad. Of course, he's not gonna be Creed without his daily arrogance.
"Sana okay ka lang." Sarkastikong sagot ko.
He clicked his tongue as he followed me.
"Hindi e, ayaw mong makipag-date sa akin e."
Napatitig akong muli sa kanya, weighing if he was messing with me, but for a moment I thought it was true but then he laughed.
"Joke lang, sige na, skim through the books, busy yourself since ayaw mo naman sa akin makipag-date." Sabi niya.. "But hey, no med school books. May mga literature diyan na mae-enjoy mo."
"Bakit ka sumusunod?"
Tinuro niya ang dulong kwarto.
I just nodded silently. Hindi na ako nagusisa dahil nirerespeto ko ang privacy niya kaya naman binuksan ko na lamang ang pintuan ng study room.
When I turned on the lights, I immediately saw the bookshelves around the room with thick books. Sa gitna ng kwarto ay may mahogany na lamesa at plush red seat. May monitor at keyboard sa ibabaw ng lamesa. I looked around as I walked slowly, observing the books. I actually found one that I'm interested in. Lumabas muna ako sandali at kinuha ang aking cellphone at earphones.
Nang makabalik ako ay kinuha ko ang Pride and Prejudice ni Jane Austen. I sat down on the plush seat and started to read while I was listening to old songs.
It was a good book dahil hindi ko namalayan na halos dalawang oras na pala akong nakaupo at nagbabasa habang nakikinig ng kanta. Namalayan ko lamang iyon nang matapos ko na ang libro.
I stretched and stood up. I took out my earphones and settled my device on the table bago ako naglakad patungo sa bookshelves. Ibinalik ko iyon at tumingin pa sa ibang mga genre at letra. Then something caught my eyes. I took a second look, baka namamalikmata lang ako.
Italian-English Dictionary
Mabilis akong lumapit doon at binunot ang libro. Holy crap, I have been meaning to find out the meaning of the Italian words that he told me. Especially dolcezza. Dinala ko iyon sa upuan at nagbuklat.
I adjusted my glasses as I flipped the pages. Nahigit ko ang akong hininga nang makita ko ang ibig sabihin noon.
Sweetness.
My heart pounded as I tried to remember the other words he said.
Per ora. That's the word, kaya naman nagbuklat ulit ako.
"For now?" Bulong ko sa sarili ko..
Pilit kong inalala ang sinabi niya bago iyon. My head sting a little bit, freaking concussions, but it didn't stop me.
"Yes, we're friends..per ora...for now." I whispered to myself.
Oh my universe.
Sono solo un amico..
'Yun yung sinabi niya sa akin noong hinatid niya ako sa pinto...the last part ma non per molto..
"I'm just a friend.....but not for long." I whispered to myself.
Anyone with common sense would know what it means...but there is only one way to confirm..and that is, asking him. Ayoko nang magpaligoy-ligoy pa kaya naman dala ang libro ay lumabas ako. I was about to head to the last door, when it opened.
I didn't see what was inside because I was focused on him. Nakatali ang itim at may kahabaan niyang buhok, there were smudges of paint on his shirt, but I couldn't care less.
"Hey, are you okay?" Tanong niya nang mapansin niyang nakatitig ako sa kanya.
I adjusted my glasses.
"Yes, we're friends..per ora..for now." I replied. "S-sinabi mo sa akin 'yun sa loob noong Janitor's closet..I found out what it means, because of this," Bahagya kong itinaas ang maliit na libro.
His eyes widened in surprise, he stepped closer.
"Jillian.." He called my name huskily.
"I'm just a friend but not for long..you told me that, noong hinatid mo ako. W-What is that supposed to mean?" I asked kahit parang alam ko na ang sagot.
Hindi siya sumagot, bagkus ay tinawid niya ang distansya namin. He towered me as I looked up at him.
He didn't waste any time too dahil sumagot siya agad, habang nakatitig sa aking mga mata.
"Gusto kita." Deretsong sagot niya. He tucked his hair behind his ear and licked his lips.
My heart is pounding and my palms are sweating.
"B-bakit? Damn it, C-Creed, b-bakit ako?"
He raised his left hand and brought it to my cheek, his scent is invading my nostrils.
"What do you mean?"
My lips trembled.
"You have your life together, you are rich, you are a freaking good man and handsome. B-bakit ako? Y-you're too good for me..I am not enough for you--"
He cupped my face and kissed me. He tilted his head so he wouldn't hit my forehead lac and my glasses. Nabitawan ko ang libro. Something inside me sparked as he moved his soft and warm lips against mine.
He was my first kiss, and I don't know how to kiss, but then I just moved with his lips and it felt so good...we were in sync.. He kissed all my insecurities in a snap. I closed my eyes and copied the moves of his lips until we're both panting.
When we pulled away, he stared at me with such gladness and joy in his eyes. I nibbled on my lower lip for a moment. Nakakapit pa din ako sa mga braso niya.
"You are more than enough, Jillian. Riches does not mean anything to me and I don't have my life together without you," He sincerely said making my heartbeat even more erratic.
I licked my lips.
"You gave my life a new meaning---colorful, freaking bright...You make me feel so alive...I remember that one afternoon..hinding-hindi ko makakalimutan kung paano ako natigilan sa tawa mo. I think I said something funny or stupid and you laughed....it was a genuine and beautiful laugh...h-hindi ko malilimutan kung paano ako napatitig lang sa'yo dahil pinabilis mo ang tibok ng puso ko. You made me feel a spark and goddamnit, I used to think it was stupid, until it happened to me," He ran his knuckles on my cheek. Napahigpit ang hawak ko sa kanya habang nakatitig ako sa gwapo niyang mukha. The light in the hallway is illuminating on his pointed nose and strong jaw.
Pakiramdam ko ay tatakas na ang puso ko sa loob ng aking ribcage. He makes me feel so much emotions...so much passion.
"I was so captivated by how your hair falls on the side of your face....god, you have such pretty eyes, I could stare and willingly drown in them. Maybe it's not just your beauty, maybe because I just had that unexplainable feeling of adrenaline in my chest. Whenever I see you, hear you laugh, see you smile. It brings me so much joy...it also breaks me when you're sad and hurt..I never had that empathy for anybody until you," He huskily said as he looked into my eyes, it was sparkling and dreamy. "But I am certain that I want you more than I ever wanted anybody." His green orbs were filled with adoration..for me. I never had anyone looked at me that way, as If I am the most beautiful woman he'd ever known.
Nanlabo ang paningin ko dahil sa luha, tears...dahil hindi ko kailanman naisip na may magkakagusto sa akin ng ganito.
"I didn't have my life together until I met you...my life revolve around alcohol and mindless fucks. Akala ko iyon na ang depinisyon ng kasiyahan, pero mali ako. Ikaw ang depinisyon ng kasiyahan, Jillian Klairo. You bring out the best in me. You make me want to be better. "
He wiped my tears. I was speechless for a moment.
"Please, tell me anything..say something.." He gently said, dahil napatitig lang ako sa kanya.
I smiled.
"I had my own little world.. I was just surviving, existing wondering when the darkness and the hardship will stop...until you came.." I touched his cheek, he quickly leaned onto my touch.
"I didn't want to let you in at first, because pushing people away is what I do. It's my own way of protecting myself...dahil takot akong masaktan..I had my walls up so high to protect myself from other people..but you crumbled the walls and made me see that life could be something else other than suffering..the moment that I let you in, I knew that I wouldn't be able to stop myself from liking you...adoring you...kasi Creed hindi ka mahirap magustuhan,"
Nangigilid ang mga luha niya habang hawak niya aking mga pisngi. There was a smile on his lips.
"Creed, I was surviving... you made me feel alive...like how I can make you feel..For the first time in my life, I was...h-happy...kung ako ang depinisyon mo ng kasiyahan, you're my anchor, you make me want to fight my demons...and love myself...you are pulling me from the deep end......I like you so much..gusto kita, Creed. Gustong-gusto.."
He smiled as if he just won the fucking lottery.
"But just you know, a relationship with me will not be easy...I am a damaged good...I still have a lot of issues to work on..and I...still have a long way to go..."
He nodded understandingly.
"I know about it and I am not going anywhere, I will be here at your worst, at the bad at the good. I want every inch of you, Jillian Klairo."
I smiled as I wiped his lone tear.
"In this world there is no constant, things change everyday but all I know is that my feelings for you are one of the constants in this world." I said.
He caressed my cheek with his thumb again. He bit his lower lip.
"Jillian, kinikilig ako!"
I can't help but to laugh as I witnessed his face blushed. It was a genuine reaction.
I giggled. He's so cute, it makes me want to kiss him and so, I did. Tumingkayad ako at inabot ang mga labi niya. The moment our lips met, the fire in my core lit as that sensation washed over my chest.
He wrapped his arms around me as he pushed me on the wall. I kissed him with every unexplainable feeling I have. Gosh, I am falling for this man.
Tumaas ang kamay ko sa kanyang leeg. I wrapped my arms around it as our kiss deepened. My heart is pounding and my blood is pumping through my veins.
Suddenly, the heat spread through my body like a wildfire when he bit my lower lip and sucked it. Oh, my. My eyes were still closed as the delicious sensation courses through me.
I feel so hot and that heat between my legs.
Unti-unti ay bumaba ang kanyang labi sa aking panga, planting small and hot kisses, bumaba iyon hanggang sa aking leeg. Napahalinghing naman ako ng sipsipin niya ang sensitibo kong balat doon. Napakapit ako sa malambot niyang buhok.
"Ahh.."
I heard him groan.
"Damn it, you have sexy moans." He whispered in my ear before he returned his lips on my cheeks, and to my disappointment he pulled away.
Nang tumingin siya sa akin ay kita ko ang pagnanasa sa kanyang mga mata.
"More..I w-want more.." I breathlessly said because I am done resisting. It feels so good..what more if we do something else?
A delicious chuckle rumbled from his chest.
"Not now, dolcezza...soon." He whispered huskily and adjusted my glasses dahil bahagya iyon na natabingi.
"Tomorrow?" I asked.
He smirked.
"Maybe? We have to focus on studying...you know that.." He sounded so tense...and controlled at the same time.
I bit my lower lip and ran my tongue on it. Napalunok siya nang bumaba ang mga mata niya doon.
"We'll see." I teasingly replied.
His jaw clenched as his eyes darkened.
"Jillian." There was a adge on his tone.
Tumawa naman ako at niyakap siya.
"I'm kidding...pero half meant."
A chuckle rumbled from his chest. I sighed as I rested my cheek on his chest. He kissed the top of my head.
"You're mine.." he whispered and wrapped his strongs arms around me tighter.
I smiled. I adore this man so damn much.