I can barely move when I wake up. Every muscle has seized up and my head is pounding. My body is struggling to recover, to repair the damage Christine caused. Every breath I draw in feels heavy and my neck hurts as I turn it to look around me.
Joon and Jimin are sitting in some chairs beside my bed, leaning against each other, deep in sleep. Hobi is leaning forward in a chair, head resting on my bed and my hand clasped lightly in his.
Jin and Yoongi are nowhere to be seen. A smile crosses my face and I wince at the pain it causes. But I can't help it because my eyes land on the two boys nestled on the couch. Tae and Kookie.
I look down at myself. On each arm, there are big purple welts and scratches from my fight with Christine. I know how lucky I am not to have any broken bones.
Unable to move with any grace, my movements are jerky as I try to sit up in the bed. Hobi wakes with a jolt, as he feels me shuffling, panic written all over his face.
"Sunshine you're awake." He croaks out. All the joy and playfulness he usually sports is gone.
"Don't you ever scare me like this again!" He says, eyes welling up with tears.
I nod my head not trusting my voice. My throat is parched and I'm not sure any sound would come out if I tried.
Despite the protest from my muscles, I lift my arms up to him and he quickly but gently moves on the bed wrapping his arms around me too.
"You don't know how scary it was, to see you lying there like that Sunshine. But it's all over now, they're going away for a long time." He says as he rubs my back. My head resting on his shoulder.
A chuckle leaves my lips and then the tears start rolling down my cheeks. There was a time when I thought there was no hope of rescue for me but, somehow they found a way to light a fire inside me. A flame so magnificent, that it blinded the darkness left lurking in my heart.
I was set free. I was free from them! Ashton and Christine couldn't hurt me anymore. The current pain in my body was overshadowed by the relief and happiness my heartfelt. I finally felt like I could breathe, that there was hope for the future.
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"Jin I can do it on my own!" I whined as I tried to step away from him.
"No can do Sweetheart, you're still wobbly!" He protested as he gripped my hand.
"Nonsense." I scoff trying to push past him.
"You either sleep down here, or you let me help you." He says sternly.
I stayed in the hospital for an extra day, once I'd woken up. All the boys were weepy and had apologized profusely for not getting to me fast enough, It wasn't their fault, and I reassured them as best as I could and tried to show I was okay, but they have all been super overprotective.
I turn to the other guys, my eyes pleading for any sort of help. They all looked at me with hidden laughs. No one was gonna fight against Jin in my defense. I sighed in defeat holding on to his hand and gripping the railing, as he helped me up the stairs.
"I'll take her up," Tae spoke up.
All the laughter was gone now, as he and Jin shared a look. Jin released my hand and Tae gently wrapped an arm around my waist, and we quietly made our way up the stairs. It's been days, me and Tae hadn't talked since our fight. It hurt because all I wanted was to have my friend back.
By the time we made it halfway to the top of the stairs, I was actually so grateful he was helping. My head was pounding and I was feeling a little dizzy. Letting go of the railing, both of my hands wrapped tightly around his arm trying to stay steady.
"You're so stubborn." He huffs out, as he moves my hands to his shoulder and crouches in front of me.
My hands slide down his shoulders, as I lock them together around his neck. He gently grabs my thighs and pulls me up onto his back, walking up the rest of the stairs and into my room, sitting me on my bed softly he turns to look at me.
The silence is oppressing and I can't take it anymore. "Tae I'm sorry"
Shock is plastered on Tae's face, and I watch as he nervously gulps. Then his eyes soften, as he sits down beside me, staring at his hands like they are the most important thing in the world. "No Hun, I'm sorry."
"I'm so sorry I yelled at you, I'm sorry I didn't talk to you, I'm sorry I wasn't there on time." His voice wavers as he speaks.
"Don't be sorry Tae. Nothing was your fault." I wrap my arms around his waist and hug him tight, resting my head on his chest.
"I miss you so much Tae, you're one of my best friends," I mumble.
I feel him tense in my embrace, and look up into his eyes. He looks so defeated, sad, hurt? My arms tighten around him, trying to reassure him I'm not mad.
"I love you."
"Let's cuddle and watch a movie."He finally speaks changing the subject, wrapping his arms around me, and pulling me back into the bed. He gives me his best attempt at a smile.
I nod and snuggle up next to him. The butterflies that always seem to be present when I'm with him start going crazy, as he pulls me closer, kissing the top of my head.
"Tae?"
He hmms in response. I'm a coward though, and can't meet his eyes. He grabs my chin tilting my head up, questions forming in his eyes.
"You can tell me anything Hun."
"I-I'm gonna leave" I stutter out.
"Why? I thought you wanted to watch a movie?" He asks, confused.
"No Tae, I mean, I want to leave here, I want to go out and really live my life," I say laying my head back down on his chest.
"What about us? What about me? What are we gonna do without you?"
"I won't be gone forever Tae. Plus we can facetime and text all the time!" I say excitedly.
"When? When will you leave?" His voice comes out choked.
I start to tilt my head up, but Tae places his hand on my head stopping me, holding me in place.
"I don't know Tae. I haven't made a plan yet."
Tae runs his fingers through my hair. We don't talk about it anymore. I don't even know what movie Tae puts on, my head is resting on his chest, our legs intertwined. I'm quickly lulled to sleep by the soft beats of his heart.
"I love you too hun. Please don't leave." He says to my deaf ears.
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"YOU CAN'T JUST LEAVE?!" Yoongi raises his voice, causing me to flinch away from him.
This was a whole new side to him, he was always so calm and collected, but he was fuming. We've been in his studio for the last hour, debating this and he'd finally lost his patience.
"Yoongi... Don't you get it?" I say softly, I know better than to raise my voice back, it'll get us nowhere.
"THEY'RE GONE JILLIAN! YOU DON'T HAVE TO RUN ANYMORE!!" He steps towards me.
I scoot back into the couch, drawing my legs up to my chest. I know he would NEVER hurt me but I'm still intimidated.
He freezes seeing me panic a little and tries to calm down. I watch as he takes a deep breath, fists clenching and unclenching at his sides.
"We're your family Jillian, why do you want to leave us?" He asks more calmly, as he sits in his desk chair leaving me on the couch.
"It's not that I want to leave you guys. I love you all. But I'm finally free Yoongi." I let my legs slide back down to the floor as I lean forward.
"It's the first time in my life that I can finally do anything I want, without looking over my shoulder in worry. I can't keep being a burden to you all."
"Jillian who the fuck told you that you're a burden!" His voice starts to rise again.
"I don't see you as a burden and I'll fucking beat whoever told you that!" He harshly states.
"Yoongi..." I sigh. "No one told me I'm a burden Yoongi, but I see it. Someone or all of you have been at my house every day for two months. You guys aren't going to work or doing the things you like. You're all so worried to leave me alone, that you forgot how to be yourselves.
I can see the cogs turning in Yoongi's head, as his brows furrowed together. He's not looking at me, as he itches his nose.
"Yoongi. I'm going, either way, my lease is about to be up, and it's finally my time to fly." I stood up walking in front of him, finally making him look up at me.
"That doesn't mean you have to leave. You can stay with us. You know one of us can bunk together so you have a room. We'll back off and let you have some space." Yoongi is grasping at straws.
He's probably been the most overprotective of the bunch, and that's really saying something, considering how clingy Kookie has been. After Ashton and Christine were arrested, Yoongi was set free too; He no longer had that hate to grasp on to, and it seemed like instead, he grasped onto me.
"You guys ARE my family and make me strong. You guys are my safety net, ready to always catch me and I love you all for it. But I need to be strong on my own two feet Yoongi."
"Will you come back?" He asks nervously.
"Of course I will! You guys are my home!"
His dumb gummy smile spreads over his face as he laughs. "When did you get so mushy?"
"Oh Em Gee! Shut up Lil Meow Meow, you were the one losing it a second ago."
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Oh my god! I'd rather go deal with Yoongi again.
Jin and Joon sat in front of me not saying a word. I had called them both over for our dinner and drinks tradition. I thought it was better to break the news of me leaving to them together. But I was soooo wrong!
After we had cooked and eaten, we were now sitting outside with drinks. I told them after their first drink, thinking it would help them loosen up and receive the information better.
They instead have decided to team up on me. Neither one of them is speaking to me! But seem to be having a conversation with each other, as they stare at one another eyebrows randomly moving up and down. ~Telepathy~ ugh I swear they're dumb.
"Are you two gonna talk to me or should I just go to bed?" I ask not being able to keep the annoyance out of my voice. I lean back in my chair, crossing my arms over my chest.
"We understand Tiny One" Joon is the one who finally breaks the silence.
"But where will you go, Sweetheart?" Jin questions.
"I want to travel, Jin. I don't have a big plan, but I have enough saved up to last me for a while." I flash them a reassuring smile.
"You need to have an actual plan Tiny One, I can't just feel okay with you leaving and anything can happen," Joon says seriously.
"AND you have to promise to talk to us every day or I WILL come to find you!" Jin exclaims, raising an eyebrow at me, daring me to disagree.
"Ugh fine! Where do we even start guys?"
We spend the next few hours planning a NamJin approved trip. I'm not gonna lie. I felt more confident in leaving now. I knew what stops I was gonna make, where I would stay and both Jin and Joon assured me if anything was to happen they would come in a heartbeat.
"SUNSHINE WHY ARE YOU NOT PICKING UP YOUR PHONE?!" Hobi yells as he walks into the house. Gosh, they don't even knock anymore they just let themselves into my house!
"OOOO WHAT IS THIS ARE WE PLANNING A FAMILY TRIP!?" He asks excitedly sitting on the single sofa clapping very enthusiastically.
"Well not exactly." Joon bursts his bubble.
Hobi instantly pouts, looking at him questioningly. "Well, all of these papers are clearly for a trip." He says, picking up some of the papers reading them. "For only one person?"
Jin and Joon both stare at me, nudging their heads in Hobi's direction insisting I tell him. I shoot them both a glare as Joon is sending me a finger heart. Both, then suddenly, give me the fighting fist and I groan as I roll my eyes.
They are not subtle at all and Hobi notices right away. His brows furrowed and he turned to look at me.
"Sunshine are you going somewhere?" He asks softly.
"Uhh yeah." I nod my head nervously.
"I just need to get away for a little, try things on my own."
Hobi stands from the chair and quickly pulls me up into a tight hug. He starts jumping while he's squeezing the air out of my lungs. "OH MY GOD SUNSHINE! HOW EXCITING!"
I giggle at his energy, trying to pull away from him. "I can't breathe Hobaaaeeee" I whine and he loosens his grip on me.
"Sunshine this is just so great! You have to get me souvenirs! AND promise to take lots of pictures and, and you have to facetime me, and you have to text me every day and OH MY GOD think of all the new drinks you're gonna get to try without ME! AND ALL THE NEW STREET PERFORMERS! SUNSHINE I'M JEALOUS, I'M GONNA MISS YOU SOOO MUCH" He's rambling, sounding like an auctioneer, his voice has gotten back to that high-pitched yelling he usually does.
"I promise Hobi I'll stay in contact." I laugh as he holds his pinky up to me.
Our pinkies lock together and we press our thumbs together sealing our promise. The other two boys are laughing on the couch watching us.
"Well, you took it better than we thought," Jin says as Hobi sits back down, pulling me onto his lap, as he squishes me in his hug.
"Why would I take this bad? This is so great for her! And you will be coming back right sunshine?" He tilts around my body, bringing his face inches away from mine with a goofy questioning look on his face.
"Ha stop it!" I laugh, pushing his head away from my face.
"Of course I'll be back. My two favorite people have planned everything."
Hobi instantly pouts and Jin and Joon have smug looks on their faces.
"Told you I was her favorite. How could she not fall for all this handsomeness and charm." Jin wiggles his eyebrows at the rest of us.
"Uh you're delusional, she clearly said WE are her favorites," Joon argues back.
"But what about meeee." Hobi whines.
"You're my favorite too Hobi." I hug him close
We both burst out laughing because now Jin and Joon are arguing about what the definition of favorite is. Hobi pats my shoulder, drawing my attention back to him.
"You've got this Sunshine. I'm so happy for you." He gives me his beautiful heart-shaped smile. I find myself grinning like a fool back at him. Finally excited for what my future holds.
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I was leaving this weekend and there were still two people I hadn't told. Not from lack of trying, but one had been away on a job and the other was clearly avoiding me.
I was sitting criss-cross applesauce on his bed waiting, so I could surprise him when he got home. But I was bored. He was supposed to be home an hour ago but still hasn't shown up. I'd already done all the snooping I could, but there was nothing to find, he was so neat and tidy.
His room really reflected him. He had his bed pushed against his yellow accent wall that had strings pined all over. Attached to those strings, were tons of pictures and souvenirs. There were pictures of him and the guys, him and I. I laughed looking at the photos. There's a close-up pic of Jin sleeping, but at a super unflattering angle, you could see up his nose and I know it was taken just to tease him. There's one of Tae giving Yoongi a piggyback because Yoongi was tired.
My eyes stop on the one with me and him, with cake all over our faces and stupid grins. He had wanted to bake a cake just for fun, but after it was ready to eat, he went to give me a bite and tripped, throwing some into my face. My smile is so wide, that my cheeks hurt, remembering our cake fight and then Jin coming into the kitchen scolding us on how we ruined his kitchen.
I hear the door click and I stand up, as the man I'd been waiting for steps into the room dragging his bag with him.
"JIMINIE YOU'RE BACK!" I shouted excitedly, running and hopping on him.
He barely has time to drop his bag, as he catches me in his arms trying to stay balanced.
"You really need to stop picking up Hobi's habits." He chuckles as he spins me around.
"I missed you too." He says, placing me on the ground. Picking up his bag, he walks to his desk placing it on top, as he turns and leans against it.
"To what do I owe this pleasure?" He asks, crossing his arms against his chest.
"I've got news!" I say happily. If anyone was gonna take this alright it would be Jimin.
"Well don't keep me in suspense Darling." His head tilts as his eyes widen a little, nudging me to continue.
"I'm going on a trip. Joon and Jin helped me plan it." I say, wiggling my shoulders in excitement.
"That's great! When are you going?"
"Uh that's the thing, I'm leaving Saturday."
"SATURDAY! That's in two days Darling. Does everyone know? Why are you just telling me?" He rants waving his hands around, as he starts to pace.
"Jimin you've been gone for a week, and I didn't wanna tell you over the phone!"
He stops his pacing and looks at me giving me his large smile that makes his eye disappear.
"You are so sweet you know that?"
"Yeah yeah." I brushed off his comment with a roll of my eyes.
"And I've talked to everyone except Kookie, but I'm sure he knows."
"Why haven't you talked to Kookie?"
"He's avoiding me." I groan as I flop myself back onto Jimin's bed.
Jimin scoffs as he lays in the bed next to me. "That stupid bunny. He does everything the hard way."
I look at him raising an eyebrow in question.
"Ha don't you know darling?"
"Know what?"
It is at that exact moment, said stupid bunny walks into the room interrupting us.
"Jimin can we tal..." He stops and looks at me and Jimin laying in the bed together. His jaw clenches and he looks mad.
"Well look who it is! I think you two should talk." Jimin rolls over, leaning into me a little. He leans towards my ear. "Now's your chance Darling." He whispers causing a shiver to course through me.
Kookie's eyes narrow on Jimin, as he walks by with a dumb smirk on his face. Jimin closes the door behind him and leaves me in the room with Kookie. I sit up in the bed crossing my arms over my chest, staring at him.
Kookie stands in the middle of the room, hands inside the pocket of his jeans. He exhales heavily and looks at me. I watch as he bites his tongue, his jaw is still clenched trying to relax.
"We need to talk." He says stepping towards me.
"Oh, you're finally talking to me?" I retorted, unable to keep the sass out of my voice.
"Jelly stop. Let me just talk."
My eyes widened in surprise. He never calls me anything but Babe. I subconsciously frown, already missing the name he usually addresses me by. Kookie steps in front of me, looking down at me. I'm a little intimidated, but he no longer looks mad, he looks nervous. He's chewing on his bottom lip, eyes wide, looking at me pleading for something.
"I know you're leaving and I don't want you to."
I try to speak and he holds up his hand, stopping me. All arguments leave my head, as he pulls me up off the bed. He pulls me close, our chests touching each other. I feel his soft breaths against my face.
"I meant what I said Jelly, I want more. This isn't a fling for me." His soft lips brush against mine as he speaks.
"There's something about you, that brings real passion into my life. I wasn't perfect before we met. I won't be perfect after either. But you have made me real, in a way, I never knew was possible and for you, I'm going to try every day to become the man your heart deserves and needs."
My heart skips a beat. I've never seen Kookie like this. His hands are resting against my back as he presses me close, eyes locked onto mine. The usual lust is gone, his eyes showing nothing but how sincere he is.
"Kookie... I'm leaving on Saturday" I whisper.
I pull away from him keeping him at an arm's length. He paused and sighed. "I'll wait for you." He steps towards me and I step back again.
He frowns at my action, casting his gaze onto the ground. He glanced back up at me, staring deep into my eyes. "No matter what happens to us, every day spent with you is the best day of my life."
Kookie takes a step forward, and this time I can't make myself move. The way he's speaking made something inside of me melt. Kookie steps back into my personal space, his finger brushes my cheek. His tall frame is towering over me, he leans closer, a breath away from my lips. His lips hover over mine, seeing if I'll push him away. When I don't, his dumb bunny smile spreads across his face.
He gently presses his lips against mine and when I kiss him back, I feel his arms wrap around my waist pulling me closer. His tongue brushes against my lips asking for access. I allow it, moaning as my hands run through his hair. The kiss is slow, sweet, and so perfect.
We both struggle to catch our breaths as we pull away. Kookie stays looking down at me with nothing but affection.
"I'll be here waiting for you when you come back, Babe." He gently says, giving me a beautiful smile.
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We were all standing inside the airport. I haven't stopped crying, since we loaded up the car. Hobi, Jin, and Dani had me wrapped in a tight hug as they cried also.
"As soon as you land make sure to call me Sunshine." Hobi sniffles trying to calm himself.
"And make sure you eat Sweetheart! We can't have you skipping meals," Jin says. I smile, nodding my head as I hold them. Joon, Yoongi, and Jimin pry them away from me.
"Make sure to tell me about all the cute guys you meet," Dani says, causing both of us to chuckle.
"Let us say goodbye too!" Yoongi snaps, as he steps in front of me holding his arms open.
I quickly rush into them, hugging him tightly, my face buried into his chest. "I'm gonna miss you so much!" I mumble.
"We're only a call away Tiny One," Joon says as he pulls me into a hug.
"You're going to do great Darling. Don't ever forget how strong you are." Jimin says finally taking his turn to hug me goodbye.
"Move midget, it's my turn!" Kookie playfully shoves Jimin away and pulls me close.
"Remember what I said, Babe. I'll be here when you get back." He gently presses a quick kiss to my lips making me blush.
Tae clears his throat beside us, looking a little annoyed. He's been distant the last couple of weeks, he hasn't all out avoided me but, he has put me at an arm's length. My heart hurt because I missed our late-night talks and cuddles as we fell asleep. I missed our closeness.
Kookie let me go and I turned to Tae. It was like a dam broke and I cried even harder. Tae's face softens and he pulls me into a hug, rubbing my back trying to calm me down.
"W-what am I g-going to do without y-you?!" I'm sure I look like an ugly mess, as I stutter over the words.
"You know I'm always here Hun." He says against the top of my head.
He holds me away from him a little, causing me to look up into his handsome face.
"I love you."
The way he says it, it's different from all the other times we've told each other. The butterflies in my stomach go crazy, as our eyes lock with each other. Tae gently brushes the tears from my cheeks, and my breath hitches.
"I-"
I'm interrupted by the announcer saying my plane is boarding. Tae lets go of me before I can say anything and has already stepped back beside the other guys. Kookie looks annoyed but when it clicks I'm finally leaving, he pouts.
"I love you all! I promise to keep you all updated."
We all hugged one more time. I take a deep breath as I step in line to get onto the plane. I turn around, giving them one last glance waving.
"I'll miss you all!" I shout, not caring about the other people who look at me like I'm crazy.
Jin shoots me a flying kiss, and I laugh obnoxiously loud, as the others wave back.
"WE WILL MISS YOU MORE SUNSHINE," Hobi yells back, also not caring about anyone around him.
I take my seat on the plane pulling out my AirPods, and start the playlist Joon made for me. I let the relaxing music soothe me, as the plane takes off. My heart ached to be away from my family but was overpowered by the excitement I had.
I finally found the passion to live my life, all thanks to seven wonderful men.
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