After that interaction, I speak to few other men. I do not approach them and they do not approach me and I must say that I am not too heartbroken by that. All conversations I have do not compare to the first I had, and that does make me feel slightly heartbroken, to know that I shall not ever marry a man who makes me feel as though I did in only that brief exchange. As I am sure that Nigel Berbrooke shall approach me once again, and I am searching the room desperately for an escape, I am called upon once more. "Dear girl, have you even danced this evening?" I glance to see that it is Lady Danbury who addresses me. I have met her multiple times before, and have always found her no nonsense attitude rather aspirational. She has seen my paintings and has even taken one for her own home, although I do not see it in the ballroom. It should be skyed, that is what I should want with it. I completed it years ago and I imagine it is anything other than perfect or artistic or even acceptable. I have grown since then, as have my painting skills. "Oh, you must dance. You are a young debutante and we shall all wish to see your dancing skills."
"I am concerned, lady Danbury, that my strengths lie only in watching and critiquing others dancing, rather than dancing myself." I sip from my champagne, grimacing once again as I remember why it is I decided I did not like it in the first place. Yet it is the only drink on offer and so it seems I do not exactly have a variety of choice.
"If you can critique then you must do it yourself and prove that you may do better. I shall find you a dance partner." She scans the ballroom, narrowing her eyes slightly. As she turns her back, I sneak away.
I know that this should be considered greatly rude, but Lady Danbury does not take offence. She only meets my eye as I have reached halfway across the ballroom, and tilts her head with a crooked eyebrow, as though to suggest she shall get me one day. Once I have put some distance between myself and her, as well as keeping an eye on the whereabouts of Lord Berbrooke and the other old and disgusting men that have tried to speak to me. In the same way that Lady Danbury quietly snuck up behind me to engage me in conversation, so does Colin and Pen. "Are you hiding from lady Danbury as well, Peaches?"
"She was trying to find me a partner to dance with." I laugh a little, as does colin, and therefore penelope forces herself to as well. It is honestly such a wonder to me that he does not recognise completely how smitten she is. "I have tried to tell her I am not a dancer but I do believe she may kidnap me to the dance floor at any moment."
"I hide for the exact same reason. I have danced once this evening and you should think that should be enough, would you not? Alas, lady danbury shall never be satisfied." Colin drinks the champagne with such ease that I am jealous, although I suppose he will have had much more experience with these things than myself. "Perhaps we shall dance, Pen? What shall you think of that?"
"I think that you have blessed the dance floor already too many times, Colin. No one need see your clumpy footwork again." Benedict now joins the group, and I ignore the nagging feeling in my stomach that I must properly join in the conversation now that he is here. I feel as Pen must, stupid. Just simply rather stupid and naive, I did never think I was the kind of girl who should feel like this after only one interaction! Only one! "I am yet to see either you or Penelope show us what you can do, though."
I realise that he speaks to me. "Oh, I have. Perhaps you just did not see."
"I am sure that is not true. I should have noticed you in that dress if you had been on the dance floor." As he smiles, his whole face smiles with him once again, and he holds his hand, outstretched to me. I think for a moment it is to offer me a dance but it is not, it is to offer to take my empty champagne flute from my gloves. He takes it and excuses himself from the small group that has formed, before he takes the glasses back to the place in which they belong.
Colin sighs. "I must go. I can see that Anthony and Daphne are leaving and I fear that myself and Benedict shall wreak too much havoc if we are allowed to remain here alone." He bows his head to my sister and then to myself. "I do hope to see you both again soon."
The end of the ball arrives and I am glad it is. I have survived my first interaction with the ton.
"And did a single one of you confirm that you shall have callers? Did a single one of you even converse to a man this evening?" My mother has been talking the entirety of the way home in the carriage, and I did think that she should stop when we arrived back to the house but it appears that I was gravely mistaken. "And how shall it look when we do not receive a single caller tomorrow morning? It shall look as though no one shall want you and that is... oh, I did not expect this should go so horribly so quickly. You girls shall have to work much harder if we are to have each of you engaged by the end of the season!" I believe that if I am quiet and inconspicuous enough then perhaps I shall be able to sneak away from the situation without anyone recognising, but I am surely mistaken. "Who did you speak with this evening, Peaches? You shall not walk away from me until this has been fully and properly discussed!"
"I spoke to many men, I cannot recall all of their names." I shake my head slightly, retreating from the room, as my mother tuts and shakes her head, but does begin to accost my elder sisters instead. And so, I have escaped. At least for the night.