I tried my best to sleep the night before the mission but I just laid in my bed and stared at the ceiling instead. I kept playing scenarios out in my head, good and bad. My head was spinning. I kept telling others I could do it, but at this point was I trying to convince them or myself?
I rolled over and looked at my clock. 3:27. Instead of trying to get more sleep I change and crept down to the gym. I flipped on the lights and walked in. I put on headphones and started to punch a punching bag.
My punches and kicks got more aggressive as time went by. I tried to clear my head but I couldn't seem to do it. After an hour of intense training I stopped. I drank a small cup of water and sat by the edge of the pool, swirling my feet around the cool water.
My mind went blank and I stopped the negative thoughts left for a moment. I took out my headphones and tossed them away from the pool. I slid myself into the water allowing myself to go under the water. I felt numb the deeper I went.
I almost ran out of breath when I snapped out of it. I knew it was going to be hard, but this couldn't do this without me. I pulled myself out of the water and laid on the floor, my clothes dripping wet. I stared at the ceiling of the gym for probably another hour.
After a little longer I stood up and found a towel. I dried myself off as best I could and went back to my room. I changed into comfortable clothes and sat back on my bed. I turned back towards the clock. Now it was around 6. I sat up and put my headphones back in. I smiled and got off my bed.
I danced into the kitchen where I made breakfast for everyone. Director Fury was supposed to come back this morning to review the plan one more time and then at 5, I would head out to the club.
I cooked up a large stack of pancakes and served them to the team as they came in. They seems concerned and a few even asked if I was okay. This was probably one of the best moods I had ever been in and it was literally hours until I faced one of my biggest fears. I understood why they were concerned but this was me coping.
We finished eating and met Fury in the meeting room again. Where we ran through the plan again.
"Ok so Y/n will argue with someone drawing attention to her. Who will that be?"
Severa of them volunteered but it was ultimately my decision. "Steve? You up for it?"
He nods. "Of course"
Fury nods at me and then continues talking. We added a few extra details to our plan and when we were done it was already 3. Fury dismissed everyone and I stood up.
"I'm gonna go uh get ready." I said kind of shakily. I walk out of the room and leave everyone else sitting there.
Steve stops me outside the door. "You can change your mind you know. I know you think you need to do this, but you don't."
I smile and and cup his face. "I'm okay Stevie."
I drop my hand and walk back to my room. Before I actually start to get ready I look at myself in the mirror. I smiled, I was still me.
I grab my headphones and start to dance around the room.
As I danced I felt as if I moved back into my apartment from a few months ago. A lot had changed, but I was still me.
I kept my headphones in as I started to change. It took my almost the full two hours to get ready. I stood in the mirror again and looked at myself, this time with sad eyes instead of hopeful ones.
My y/h/c hair was curled and pinned strategically throughout my head. The dress hugged my body and I stood tall in the heels.
The dress^
The club was a little over an hour drive away so after I was done changing I walked to the lab. I met Bruce there.
"Y/n you look great! You ready?" He says as he hands me the small pill like tracker.
I smile at him. "Ready as I ever will be." I say and then down the pill. Before leaving the room I grab my little electric disk and slide it into my heel, just in case. He walks with me up to the living room where everyone else was anxiously waiting.
I smile as I enter the room. I find Steve and he's dressed nicely. He smiles when he sees me. They all do. I give hugs to them all and they offer words of encouragement in return. After a little while I walk with Steve to the garage where we hop in one of Tony's fancy cars and begin our drive.
We don't talk much in the car. I think I was honestly too nervous to speak. After an hour of driving we pull up the club and park on the opposite side of the street.
I look over to Steve. "The moment we stay out of the car, the charade begins. Im guessing he's got some people watching the doors just in case so we gotta be careful." He nods and I pull him in for one last kiss. "God I love you." I say before opening my car door and stepping out onto the busy sidewalk.
We walk to the doors of the club.
"Name?" the bouncer asks.
"Liza and Steven" I say confidently. Tony had gotten us in with fake names. I watch as he scans the list.
"Uh i've got a Liza and capsicle?" He asks.
I hold in a laugh and Steve rolls his eyes. "Yea that's us!"
He stamps our hand and we walk in. We're greeted by loud music and crazy lighting. I'm not gonna lie, at the moment I felt like a bad bitch as I pushed through the people and strutted past.
I guide Steve to the bar where we sit. I was specifically to not drink alcohol but act as if I was. Steve orders a beer and we sat at the bar and talked for a little. Every now and then we scan the bar.
After a few hours it's nine and the doors open again. I take a dee breath in as I recognize Jaden. I tilt my head towards him and Steve looks over at me.
"You sure?" He asks.
I nod. "I'm sure. You ready?"
Now he nods. "What do we even argue about?"
I smirk. "Follow my lead"
Showtime.