Picking out my favourite shirt for a party I dreaded going to felt like blasphemy. However my nicest black polo shirt with tiny flamingos on it was warm from the dryer and looking iron smooth.
Most of my clothes were dirty at this point, so it was an obvious choice. That... and he was coming, at least he said he was coming. That didn't matter of course, I mean I wasn't going mad about the guy. He was handsome and he'd asked me out and essentially this was our first date obviously not counting the first time we met in that graveyard.
If he came, of course.
I smoothed out the creases in my shirt nervously as I looked back at my reflection. I looked plain, as usual, nothing special.
It was always a mystery to both me and my friends why guys way out of my league who could have macho greased up models as their hubbies went for me, someone muscular but not that muscular, tall but not crazy tall, with short cropped hair, brown eyes and nothing much else to recommend me.
No, I wasn't ugly, but I also wasn't what I'd call handsome, and if I was put in the unfortunate position of comparing myself to Death...
I closed my eyes. It was almost hard to imagine us side by side, Death was strangely beautiful, yet powerful and handsome and more masculine than I'd ever known another man to be. Long nails, yet not painted nor acrylic, elegant fingers but in a masculine way. He dripped with sex but he was also so intimidating that even though I had an inbuilt voice inside me that was completely convinced I could get away with anything with him, I was still aware that he was in charge between the two of us.
I opened my eyes, exhaling as I looked around, wondering if a bowtie would be too much.
If I made a wrong step, would he punish me? The fact that my heart sped up when I thought of that made almost too embarrassed to look back at my reflection.
I didn't want him to be angry at me, and him punishing me at Christian's birthday party sounded like a nightmare come true... but the thought made me nervous in the kind of way thinking of jumping off a canyon might.
He might not even come.
I mean, his reply had been yes, but I also hadn't told him a time or place. Somehow I'd been so strangely comfortable in that moment that I forgot we lived in the real world and not a movie, where addresses exist and time is a factor.
He'd probably be busy, or he might not bother coming because, hell, he doesn't know the address.
I'd called ahead of time and asked Christian if it was okay for me to bring my boyfriend to the party and he'd been thrilled about it. I don't know why I had assumed he'd have been sucked into the whole mess with Zack but it didn't sound that way.
I glanced at the attic window again, the one that lead to the roof. I don't know why I expected him to come in from there when there was a perfectly usable door three floors down.
Whenever I thought of him now I saw him at night, the moon piercing through the sky at a distance, his form a warped sharp jumping all too elegantly from the roof on the building beside this one to step gently onto mine. The way he seemed to balance on one foot when he lowered himself onto the slate rooftiles...
I looked down at my shirt, the flamingos looking off in their own various directions.
I scoffed. He reminded me of a flamingo.
Patting my pocket. I stored that thought for later, this would be a great way to sooth my feelings of intimidation around the big guy.
My phone rang somewhere on the couch, buried under my pile of clothes and cushions.
I wasn't finicking, but I hadn't been sure about the shirt. Maybe something less casual, more casual, brighter, darker. Eventually I'd settled on this one not just because it was my favourite but because I didn't have enough clothes to pick from really. The brightest shirt I had was a marathon tee in highlighter yellow that had 'Race for the Colon' emblazoned on the front of it.
I ruffled through the shirts till I found it and answered the call.
"Laaaaake," Came the loud greeting.
"Hey Cody, how are you man?"
"Are you coming?" He asked me, ignoring the question.
"Yeah," I nodded, picking up my wallet and keys and putting them in my pocket before grabbing my coat, and the small neatly wrapped present I prepared. "I'm heading out right now."
"Alright," He sang. "Not like you to be late, just saying."
"I'm not late." I frowned, closing the door to my flat behind me before opening it again to switch off the lights to the living room.
"You're not early, that's late for you baby."
I laughed. "I'm coming Cody, I'll be there in fifteen."
"Okay, don't be afraid of ratboy. We're going to have fun tonight."
"Yeah," I said quietly. "Hopefully. I'll see you then."
"Bye."
I hung up and put my phone in my coat pocket, looking back into my empty apartment for a long last look before leaving.
It wasn't bothering me so much today.
Since Death had been here, to save me from apparently falling off the roof, all I could think of when I looked at my couch was him sitting there looking like he owned the place, and me.
There was something about the man that just said he was in charge of everyone and everything. Maybe being in charge of death itself gave you a bit of a power complex?
I wasn't complaining or anything. I ran a hand through my hair as I walked downstairs.
He was sexy like that, so far it hadn't bit me in the arse. It almost felt natural. Which, coming from someone who wouldn't describe themselves as either submissive or dominant in any capacity, was weird.
Opening the door on the ground floor, I allowed the chilly night air to brush past me, tickling the hair on my neck, and I zipped up my coat as I headed out through the windy path of the flats front garden.
Until Cody reminded me I almost forgot that Zack was going to be there.
It couldn't be helped, my friend circle had naturally entwined with his over the years. Most of my friends knew his and his friends knew me. I didn't know what his problem was but even if he thought, or wanted to think, that I had cheated on him, I hoped it wouldn't impact the party at all.
It was Christian's night, after all, and he had invited us to celebrate his life, not for us to squabble about ours. So I was going to try to keep clear, this wasn't going too be an opportunity for me to ask people why or what Zack had done or said to make them feel uncomfortable around me.
Yes. I stuck my left hand in my coat pocket. I was going to be the mature one in this situation, I wouldn't let Zack get to me.
~⌣︵⌣︵⌣︵⌣︵⌣︵⌣~
I wasn't sure what to think when I arrived at the party. I was pretty much on time, about five minutes late, and there was already quite a few people there, walking around and congratulating Christian.
I joined in the crowd and gave him my present with a friendly smile and a greeting.
Christian smiled back warmly, his eyes, as ever soft and kind.
I didn't know him that well, technically the only reason I knew Christian was because Zack and he used to work together for a short time. We'd really gotten closer than Zack and he did, though. Going out for dinner a couple times with other miscellaneous friends.
We weren't that close but Zack had always been annoyed when Christian took the time to ask me to come out with him a bunch of the lads from work after he moved jobs.
I stood around for a while, watching the crowd quickly grow, on my own feeling out of place and uncomfortable.
This would probably be more fun if it was just eight or so of us hanging out, going out for a nice dinner at a restaurant or something, but this party was organised by his close friends and they probably knew him best.
I knew what to expect here, pizza, booze, party hats and movies. Which would be great if I didn't feel a sense of impending doom watching the door expecting to see Zack come on through with a scowl on his face any minute.
"Lighten up." Cody grinned, handing me another group. "If he's not here now, he probably won't come."
I sighed, slumping backwards in the puffed up sofa they had that threatened to swallow me whole. "I'm not convinced. I feel like I'm sailing down shit creak without a paddle. Everything's fine right now but..."
"You'll be okay." He said, his eyes on me as he leaned in.
I knew what he was about to do and I pulled away awkwardly.
He frowned. "You're so conservative now." He said, his voice light and joking but there was a pout on his face.
I laughed. "I just..."
Was it a bad idea to say something?
It struck me then, what if Zack was telling everyone I cheated? What if that was why they didn't want to talk to me, inexplicably they just believed it and thought that I was the one who wronged him and didn't like it.
If I told them now that I had a boyfriend... wouldn't that just be confirmation of this in their minds?
But the face of Death's, they way he looked at me with those piercing red eyes, sexier than any man I'd ever seen in my life including those on catalogue covers... I shrugged inwardly. If I couldn't brag then what was the point right?
"I have a boyfriend." I said quietly, and boy did it feel nice to say that. My heart doing a couple fast beats as I thought of it.
I'd never felt that way about anyone else, embarrassed, nervous, excited and... invested.
Although I was approaching our relationship with a grain of salt and a slice of comedy I knew that under it all I was going to be crushed if it didn't work out... It didn't bear thinking about.
"Oh." I heard Cody say from my side.
"What?" I asked.
He laughed awkwardly. "Looks like he's here."
I turned to look in the direction he was nodding in and I saw him, standing amongst a group of people. He was wearing an loose orange short-cropped furry jumper and tight jeans. His hair was perfectly curled and I thought I detected a bit of pink lipstick on his lips. He looked good, handsome as ever, maybe more than I'd ever noticed him be. Or maybe I just liked looking at him more from a distance.
He looked like a sweet boy, the kind that would hide his face with his sleeves when he watched scary movies. Living with him would prove otherwise but even if that wasn't true, it still reawakened some of the initial feelings I'd felt for him.
I looked and saw a guy had his hand on the small of his back. Wearing a leather jacket, around my height but slightly more buff with earrings. He was really attractive, much more suitable for Zack.
He caught my eyes and I saw his face transform, a nasty glare settling on his features.
I raised an eyebrow.
So Zack had talked about me, but he hadn't pointed me out since he clearly didn't know I was there. How did he know I was his ex then? Or did he just greet everyone with that kind of look.
"Yikes," Cody said. "He doesn't like you."
"Nope." I nodded.
Sighing I got up and stretched. That couch made me slouch in a weird way. "I'm getting another drink." I told Cody.
He shooed me away as he put his legs up in my seat and I moved away from the congregation by the doorway to go into the kitchen where the snacks and drinks were laid out on the table.
I grabbed a bottle of lemonade and started pouring myself some in a plastic cup.
"No alcohol?" A guy I knew vaguely as Kenny or something like that approached me.
I looked around, confused. "No, there's alcohol?"
He shook his head. "I mean you don't want any?"
I looked down into my cup and back at him. "No?"
"You're quitting?" He asked me with a raised eyebrow.
"I'm... what?"
He stared at me, waiting for me to continue.
"No, I'm not quitting alcohol all together, I just don't feel like any."
"Really?" He asked incredulously.
I stared at him, beginning to frown. "Why are you asking me that, I barely know you."
"Yeah, but your boyfriend talks about you all the time."
"My boyfriend?" I couldn't even bring myself to blink.
He waved his hand, grabbing the bottle of cola and uncapping it. "Sorry, ex boyfriend."
"Zack."
"Yeah."
"He tells you what exactly?"
He spoke as he poured himself his drink. "You can't tell me you don't know what he'd say about you man..."
I swallowed. "Tell me." I tried not to get angry, but I wanted to know now what the hell he was saying about me.
He rolled his eyes. "That you're an alcoholic prick basically, that you should keep your hands to yourself."
My stomach did a summersault inside me and I considered setting my drink down before I dropped it. "I..."
"It's cool." He shrugged it off. "I don't judge anything, I'm cool I'm cool."
"No-"
But he was already walking away, squeezing through a group of women chatting by the entrance.
I stood mind blown for a long moment before I could get my legs to unglue themselves from the floor.
That was it.
That was all it took for me to decide that to hell with this party being about Christian, because this was my life he was messing with, rumours that were not only offensive but could easily mess with my job and my relations with other people.
My anger swelled inside me. I was going to go through this entire party, demanding to know what the hell he had been spouting about me.
Even as I started moving, intent fuelling a confident march towards the kitchen exit, those words spun in circles in my head.
"That you should keep your hands to yourself."
I wasn't sure I even wanted to know what that meant but I was going to set the story straight if it took the entire night for sure.
[A/N] Boo. Did that frighten you? Heh...
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