Chapter song ❤️ Aaryan shah- renegade.
Cauterize.
It simply means to burn, sear, or freeze tissue using hot iron, electric current or caustic agent. So why does it feel like my whole body is aflame and that feel is what my body is tortured through right now; it hurts, it burns. I need saving. There's this hot burning sensation which engulfs my flesh listening to my parents explain themselves to me and why they kept it away from me all these years. Anger, despair, hurt, ignorance, above all stupid.
But I meekly sat there paying half of half attention to whatever they say fighting my own battles in my head.
I could have sensed it; the private home school, security in Grandpa house, mum and dad always on business trip and Daniel never without me. It was very much clear. I thought it was because our family came from old money, famous and rich therefore making people see us as targets, sniffing for loopholes to smear our name not knowing we are who they feared in Ireland.
The O'Connor name.
It downs down to the point of contact with Alexei. I wish I never met the Russian. If that meeting never took place, none of this would have happened. The sex, Bryan hospitalised at some point, knowing that he killed someone who crosses him, Bryan still after him, Daniel and the Irish mafia and my family secret. Then my feelings for the Russian, and to top it all I'm pregnant with his child.
I wish I never met Alexei.
Sighing, dipping my hand in my Prada purse taking out the pink stick showing two lines very much vivid, befuddled, exasperated to say the least; my head falls to my wheels clutching the stick tight as the creeping tides of lustful tandems whispers in my ears, it finally dawns on me.
I am pregnant for my client.
Expelling loudly sitting up looking at the skyscraper in front of me where lies the man I want, the man I crave for, the father to my child but have to keep away from because my family don't want him. They will never accept him.
Do what you must but he don't need to know about this child if must be. Tell him you're going back to Ireland and won't come back to America. Tell him you will get married to Daniel as it should be.
Mum's words echoes in my ears; but I don't want Daniel, I want Alexei. I want to watch his face when I tell him we have a baby together, not Daniel. That will crush him if he ever finds out I kept such a secret from him all the years he has been apart from his child. And then I promise never to leave him. Finally getting what I wanted, I made him fall for me, yearn for me, crave every bit of me till he goes insatiable; then out of the blue I will pack my things and leave high and dry. That will crush him, that will surely crush him. I want to stay back with him and grow our child together but mother is right, this is for my safety and for my baby.
Alexei is who he is and I am who I am.
The psycho and the therapist.
I only hope I don't ruin him more than the first day he walked through my office doors.
Pulling open my car door stepping into the building walking into the elevator poking his suite floor. Lord forgive me for what I'm about to do.
Ding*
My eyes search for the tattooed Russian psycho finding the den empty. Unlike him. "Alexei?" Biting my lips anxiously walking further in his penthouse past the kitchen, the gym, his office. Where could he be? "Alexei?" Calling, getting no answer as I retrace my steps climbing up the stairs to the rooms, his room. There I find him sitting on the edge of the bed looking something of an empty soul, hunch back facing the floor to roof glass window. "Alexei?" Why is he like that? Stepping closer till I came to his front, still it was like he didn't see me or notice my presence. What creeped me out more is the fact he turns to face me but still look empty. Not again, please.
"Alexei, come back to me. I need you to come back to me." My hand reaches for his face touching his five o'clock beards caressing softly. He blink thrice twitching his bruised fingers I wrapped up in a bandage early last night which have me looking at them in distress. "Does it hurt?" Looking back to his green eyes kneeling down taking his hands in mine inspecting them closely. "Talk to me, what's wrong?" Raising his hands to touch my face like he does peppering them with chaste kisses.
"It hurts." The first thing he says skipping my heart in panic looking at his hands hysterical.
"Where? Tell me. I'll fix it." Standing back up about to walk in search for, I pause. "Where's your first aid kit?" Wanting to move out from our space he holds me back looking strangely at me.
"Here." Pulling me to straddle him, a soft gasp escapes me at the sudden pull but I right myself quickly as he next work hits me hard. "It hurts here." Taking my hand to his chest direct to his heart.
Gasping. "Alexei." My own heart did a flip pumping an unusual speed in my chest. Like is he saying what I'm feeling or is it my mind playing tricks at me?
Green eyes caress all over my face while I'm still struggling to calm my hyper heart. "You left. You left me flower. I hurt you and you left me." Ending broken, I just want to wrap my arms around this man and tell him I'm not going anywhere but that's a lie.
Smiling softly. "Hey, look at me." Tilting his head to mine. "I'm here okay. I'm not going anywhere." His eyes flits to my wrist and I know that look wanting to rid him off that weariness. "Look it doesn't hurt anymore." I say flexing my wrist.
"It's all my fault. I don't treat you right." I don't know what he's saying but his face morphs into an angry one and an angry Alexei is not good for him.
"Breathe Alexei...Breathe." Cupping his face just to look into my eyes. "One, two three, four; follow me to count okay." Which he does, thankfully. After few given seconds, he got back to sanity looking at me like he sees an angel.
Alexei has one infamous look and that's his prominent grin which never fails to sit on his face. He's angry, you see it; he wants to kill, very much obvious but this, this is different. My psycho Russian Prince is smiling, a very beautiful smile that has me wondering why he never smiles. So beautiful my eyes pinch because I can't help but fall for this man under me.
"I love you Flower." Oh! My! God!
I literally screamed in my head not at all expecting those words, the smile sitting on my face matches the drums of my heart. Drawing me closer to him, I guess he was expecting me to reply back but the excitement consumed me more. the hopes dancing in his eyes slowly began to fade away just like the beautiful smile I'm admiring snapping me out of my melodious hullabaloo.
His face now facing away like a child who didn't get what he wanted. Chuckling. "I love you same Alexei."
Snapping his gaze to mine. "What?"
Laughing joyfully pulling him for a very tender kiss. "I said I love you." The shock evident on his face have me laugh louder in all smiles but what can I do; I can't help but love my Russian psychopath. He's dangerous, cool; acts crazy, I love crazy; extremely jealous handsomely possessive, like who don't like alpha males because I do. So I guess that makes me crazy for falling for this Russian Prince.
Clutching me tight not wanting to let go not that I oppose, his hands trails my body as he watch me watch him. "I don't deserve you. I'm not good for you. You deserve better flower, someone with decent life and..."
"...And I'm pregnant." Cutting him off.
"Pregnant?" Green eyes widens going straight to my belly in alarm.
Smiling holding his hands to mine before placing it to my stomach. "I'm carrying your child Alexei. Our baby. Here, in me."
I was expecting to see anything but fear in his eyes. It became eerily silent till he pull me off him placing me on the bed. I kept silent watching him sit up pacing in front of me, my own fear seeping slowly occupying my happy thoughts. Don't he want the baby? Is he afraid it is not his? Will he reject our child? What will I do if that happens?
The thoughts consumed my mind still watching him pace about absentmindedly.
"I- I don't know what to do. How to be a good Daddy." Oh thank God he didn't reject our child, breathing out the air I didn't know I held back in. "Fuck! I don't even treat you right so how can I father my own child right." He went on ranting. "I know you want flowers everyday with chocolate, dinners and dates, and sweet love making, and, and now you carry my child."
"Alexei, come here." Tapping the space on the bed beside me. Reluctantly, he came but sat down dejectedly holding his head in his hands. I smile. "You know what's funny?" Glancing at me who look anything but esctatic like why won't I be?
Feeling very much more relaxed compared to the Russian who is antsy. "Chocolate and flowers are overrated and I'm happy with you whether you take me to dinner dates or not." A glimpse of hope shines in his green eyes titling his head in somewhat way his raven locks covers his eyes and part his face. My itchy fingers rise brushing the locks away revealing more of his handsome but curious face. My gosh, he's so fuckable right now. Pink lips popping, brows scrunched together, pupils dilate and that porcelain skin I love to bite. "And about love making, I could teach you, show you how much you mean to me, rid you of your fears." Climbing him once again. "Starting now."
Yeah, I just need to have him inside me. I need to make love to my psycho.
Alexei*
Her soft hands reach for my erect shaft inside my sweat pants pulling it out. It can only be her, a touch, a smile, a look, her voice automatically reacts to the motherfucker. Pumping slowly, she comes over kneeling down in front of me. "Whenever I'm with you, I have no fear. For long I've wished for this day to come, to boldly say that I love you. I love you Alexei and I know you love me too, even more." Slowly she engulfs her lips around my dick swallowing inch by inch that have my body shuddering in intense pleasure. My eyes shuts a second willing myself to hold it all in and not pop any second clutching the sheets tight knowing my veins popped. Her lips is something I could never be satisfied with, plump with the cherry blossom looking at me through her eyelashes.
She moans at the taste of my precum sending a sensual vibration running along my spine. Biting my lips, my hand reaches for her hair gripping hard as she sucks my dick harder and harder, licking, slurping and moaning in-between. Fuck! It echoes in my ear snapping my eyes open looking down at her watching me heatedly.
"I love you flower." Pushing her hair out of her face so I can see her pretty face well enough. Her eyes shines mumbling incoherent words still sucking my dick running her hands on my thighs till my dick made a loud pop out of her lips. Still that didn't stop her from licking my shaft like a lollipop, placing chaste kisses around it like she adores the thickness of me.
"I know." She smiles pulling my sweat pants complete. This woman will be the death of me helping her tug my sweats off till I am butt naked sitting at the edge of my bed. Seductively, she stood up zipping down her skin tight gown watching it pool around her long legs, she kicks it off having my breathe seize on sight of her beautiful body on display. My dick concurs to that with a twitch, bobbing and leaking generous precum. It wants her...direly.
Soon her victoria secret lace set falls to the floor as she walks back to me. Such a goddess. Looking at what's mine and will always be mine. She takes her hand in mine guiding to her glistening pussy, soft mewls escapes her lips touching the soft clit. I love hearing her moans rubbing tenderly, pinching and slapping my index and middle finger at it. Her head falls forward gripping my shoulders in a feather grip. I want to show her how much she means to me in every possible way. Her moans got louder and louder as I increase my tempo, still the psycho in me wanted more; dipping my head to her pussy my tongue darts out sucking the full mound. Her moans fills the room, my one hand parts her clit wider to achieve my aim in driving her crazy, the other hands sinks into her warm chanel gripping me tight. Alexei. She moans my name rolling her hips to meet the rythym of my strokes. I didn't want to rush it, I want to watch her quiver, tremor to course her system, I want to watch her pant and squirm hard till she is yanking her own hair in pure escatsy. And that's what I did.
"I can't function without you flower." She shakes at my deep voice in her pussy even as I continue to finger fuck the daylights out of her.
Moaning. "I know." My tongue flicks her clit before pressing flat on it slurping her juices up and then suck it hard not releasing. She screams digging her nails in my shoulders shaking like an fish out of water. If only she knows I love the pain.
In and out, in and out, my fingers drive inside her while sucking her pussy. How I love the taste of her juice splayed on my face.
"Alexei! Oh yes!" She moans again. Even the way my name falls out of my lips now enough to give me a boner. Wanting me to fuck her brains out. "Oh Alexei! Yes! Uhh!" Her moans will surely send me to my early grave. Pulling my fingers out, we look at each other, love, passion, romance, high dancing in our eyes.
I love this woman with all of my craziness.
She straddles me, aligning my dick to her sex sinking down...to hilt. "Mmh Alexei! Feel so good." All that is in my head is how tight she is, how full my dick filled her up and her soft her tender warmth clench hard on me. uhh fuck!
"I can't, fuck, I need you." Caressing each of her boobs when she move, rolling her hips slowly. Fuck! "I have to have you to myself or I will lose it."
Titling her head, her lips kisses my face; my eyes, my nose, my lips and my ear paying attention to it. "I know." My hands grips her waist as she plays double stimulation to my nervous system. Her tongue lick my overly sensitive ears while her hips works on my dick, so wet she is creating that orgasmic squish of her pussy extremely drenched.
"Yes! Fuck!" We both moaned in pleasure.
Our hands dancing on our flesh, dragging grunts and mewls out of our lips. I felt my heart will soon explode any moment now and I don't know why. I can't even fathom the magic behind this feeling but every second with her in me, feeling her hands on my skin, watching her face in the satisfaction of pleasure; it only cause my heart to beat faster and stronger. I hugged her to me feeling her hands wrap my neck as her legs locked on my waist finding my dick deeper in her pussy, she just moans taking it like my good girl with her head buried on my neck and mine in hers feasting on each other's neck. Licking at that spot that drives her wanton, she bites my neck rolling her hips with the help of my hands. I feels so good to be in her. The way her inside cling to me when she pulls out then sucks my dick back in till sounds echoes in the room.
Muffled. "Fuck! Yes! You are mine flower." Flipping us over to watch her cum apart. Her hands above her head locked in mine, I kept the slow pace looking lost in our eyes. Thrusting in and out, it was like our senses came alive watching us drive each other to the cliff. Our eyes never flitting away.
"Alexei! Mmmh! Alexei!" Her mewls getting louder as the minute passes by. She is close. "Oh Alexei! I fucking love you!" She cries out when my dick hits her spot repeatedly. She could hardly keep her eyes open now, blinking consistently, moaning louder, matching her thrusts with mine, wanting to drag my own orgasm out. "Fuck me! Oh fuck! Alexei!" her eyes shuts tight but I wasn't haven't it immediately seizing her neck snapping her eyes open in panic. But she loves it clenching harder on me as her juices leaks coating our thighs, I groan righting my senses before I loose it.
She moans. "Alexei! I want to cum, please make me cum daddy." All restraints and binds broke at that word daddy and the way she begs looking at me. So innocent but yet very sexy.
The word sent a primal lust in me hoisting her legs to my shoulder fucking her hard which she didn't expect yelping and screaming my name. "You belong to me Rosie." I say gripping her neck.
"Oh yes Alexei! I belong to you Daddy!" She moans taking my hard thrusts.
"Again flower!" Grunting hard, about to explode.
"I'm all yours daddy! Uuhhh yess! Mmmh! Yours for life. Oh fuckkk! I'm yours Daddyyy!" Good. And I fucked her into oblivion loving how she screamed my name Daddy, milking my dick of its essence till we passed out from exhaustion.
Rays of orange glow distracts my slumber groaning at the penetrating light turning to the other side going back to sleep. Something seemed off suddenly, abruptly I sit up snatching my gun in defence looking about the room which is indeed empty. But that feeling pounds in my head, glancing at the side to find it empty. Where is she?
Greeted by the strange pink stick lying on her pillow. Curious picking it up glancing at it obviously confused what it's doing on my bed. About to call her name, a note catch my attention pausing my vocals.
I am sorry it had to end this way, believe me when I said it... I love you Alexei.
Flower.
I got angry throwing the duvet off my torso snatching the remote from the bedside table shutting down the windows till the room darkened. Who does she think she is? No one, I mean no one can hide from me. Not even her.
"AlexSee. Show me God's eyes." The room came alive in a hologram displayed in front of the bed. Sitting up with my phone tablet in my hand.
"Good evening Alexei. What can I do for you today?" The automated voice greets me cheerily showing off my greatest invention.
Tapping my screen for her face swaping it over to the hologram on my wall. "Find her." My voice held a deep edge wanting to rip someone's head off. She ran away with my baby. Our baby!
"Searching for flower by the name Rosie Reyes." She fucked with the wrong psycho smirking sadistically at the hologram display.
Grinning devilishly at the information on my wall. "You can run but you can't hide from me." Looking at her face longingly on the wall. "I see it all flower and I'm coming for you."
❤️
Abbie cares