Euphoria
It's the only word that adequately describes what I felt the first time I met you;
That childlike wonder and excitement
---
They really should've listened to Azriel's warning and stayed away from Helion's wine. Apparently the other two were attuned to the strange beverage, the strength being seemingly otherworldly, but Cassian and Rhysand... well they could remember only brief moments of the previous night. And they were almost certain they wanted to keep it that way.
They'd decided to leave earlier than planned purely so Rhysand could brief Azriel. He'd given Feyre a short message just so the news wasn't so surprising and he had no doubt Azriel was already preparing for the worst. It was always helpful when predictability isn't high on the cards- like it often isn't in regards to Tamlin. And there was no doubt that Azriel would expect an emissary as intolerable as Lucien could be. Wyrd was he in for a surprise.
Cassian was still clutching his head, as if trying to stop himself from heaving or perhaps eve hold himself together, as they stumbled down the steps and back out into the open air. Had the sun been that bright yesterday? Or was Helion doing that on purpose? Most likely the latter.
Rhysand was still saying his usual goodbyes to Helion when Cassian found the strength and will power to stand fully inclined, Tahlia having just slipped back inside. He'd noticed Helion's gaze following her as she left before turning back round to face the pair, face set more firmly than before.
"Thank you. For making her see sense. She thinks she's more of a nuisance whenever I try to spare a guard for her. Says they're better off doing work that actually matters."
He was shaking his head in disbelief, but there was something else there too that Cassian didn't quite recognise. Something... maybe a little darker, a darker kind of understanding. And it wasn't the General's business he would be sticking his nose in. So rightfully, he kept his mouth shut.
"Looking after your own matters. Azriel understands this. He won't let anything happen to her." Rhys reassured, clasping a hand over the other Lord's shoulder before backing up and stretching his wings wide, reaching a hand out to Helion.
"None of us will." Cassian nodded in agreement, stretching his wings, almost falling back in a sudden dizzy haze.
"There was a time when I trusted Tamlin too. It's odd how things change." Helion lamented before switching his darkening eyes on Rhys, tightening this grip around his hand so tightly Cassian's hands twitched towards his blades. "If she's not back in one piece in Rhysand-"
"She will be."
"-I'll rip your throat out." A growl ripped from his throat as he finished his thought.
"Noted." Rhys was quick to utter, whipping back his hand and brushing off invisible dirt from his shoulders.
"I'm sure Tahlia will find her way to you early tomorrow. Have a safe journey home." And he was gone, sauntering back through the archway and into his home.
Not apparate, Cassian realised. Nor fly. 'Find her way there'. Those few words stuck with him as he took off. Just as it did the whole flight back.
It didn't take as much effort as it used to. Not having to think about every upward stroke of the delicate membrane. It was a relief. So instead, other thoughts drowned him instead. Where Nesta had invaded his thoughts the whole way there, the journey back was replaced by the new anomaly that was Helion's Third. So much so, that he tripped on the ledge of the balcony.
"Nice trip?" Mor snorted from in front of the fire. Cassian quickly collapsed on one of the plush sofas burying his face deep into the cushion, pulling up his feet to rest them on Mor's lap.
"Oh very funny." He laughed sarcastically, shoving his feet at her thighs, trying his best to kick her off the edge and send her flying. To no avail.
"I meant to Day Court. I wasn't going to bring up you being a moron but if you insist-"
"Day was... intriguing." Cassian was quick to but in, though still having no idea where to even start.
"Oh?" Mor seemed more interested at that, sitting up straighter and turning her body to face her wholly. Her face seemed brighter, maybe he imagined it but then again, Mor always loved a bit of gossip. A bit of truth.
"Oh indeed."
And he opened his mouth to proceed, yet was quickly stopped by Rhys' entrance, guiding Feyre in with a gentle hand on the small of her back. Elain and Lucien were quick to follow, then Amren. It was minutes before Azriel slipped in silently, perching himself on the windowsill, looking among them all.
Watching them, he realised. Because he'd be leaving again and this was one of the rare occasions they were all here. Except... well...
Her.
Not that he particularly minded. A bit of quiet, a bit of peace right now is exactly what he needs. Not another round of verbal sparring that puts him in an awful mood far more often than not.
"Have you abandoned your hopes at getting a rebound yet Cass?" Yes, he decided, Nesta didn't need to be here for this conversation. As harmless as Mor may think it might be.
Still, he shot an unbelieving look at Rhys and placed a mocking hand over his heart. "Rhys, you told them? I didn't even tell you!"
"You didn't have to. Your thoughts were loud enough you may as well have been screaming it in my ears."
"So you're going to do it then? Get a rebound?"
The humour dancing across her face was almost insulting, but he knew she'd be happy for him. Distancing himself away from the endless pain that came with reaching out for Nesta even when it hurt. The pain, Mor had told him, was not warranted. Perhaps. Perhaps she was right.
"Oh Morrigan, you think too little of me. I think I'm already in love." He fluttered his eyelashes like some kind of love sick puppy. Though he knew deep down it wasn't true. Tahlia was... something else. But still, he hurt. Ached.
Cassian saw Azriel shuffle slightly before he spoke. It was enough to prepare himself for the inevitable blow. "I pity the poor female." Because of course he did. There was no bite, only a light smile when he responded with one particular finger.
"Who said it was female?" Feyre was laughing from her seat on Rhys' lap. She knew. Of course she must have known Tahlia was in fact female. Apparently Rhys couldn't keep his mouth shut for longer than a second at a push.
"I did." He groaned, rolling his eyes, massaging his head with the tips of his fingers. His hangover was back in full force. "Cauldron. She's female."
"I don't think that's a wise idea, brother." Rhys was nursing a drink. It smelt like wine, Cassian knew this because even the smell was enough to have him almost gagging. How? How was he already drinking wine?
"Don't be bland. Of course it's a wise idea. In fact, I'd go as far as saying it's a brilliant idea thank you very much." Well, maybe that was a bit of a push. A fun idea? Maybe a little clever but certainly not brilliant. Not if Helion was to catch wind of it.
"You'll get your alleged manlihood ripped off the moment you show an ounce of interest." As if he could read his mind.
Right. The bastard.
"I don't think Helion would go anywhere near my balls. For that reason at least." He added a wink just for the theatrics of it all.
Rhys paused, staring at him like he was missing something. Something obvious. Shaking his head lightly, grinning behind his goblet before responding. "I wasn't talking about Helion." Oh.
Cassian dragged himself up so he was sitting, hangover be damned. Rolling his eyes before whipping his head round to the couple perched just behind Mor. "What about you Elain?"
Elain looked at him with wide eyes, like she wanted nothing else than to be left out of this particular debate. He wondered if she'd listened to any of what he'd been saying at all. "What about me?"
He scoffed loudly, letting his head fall back as he groaned, waving his arms around like it helped paint the picture better. It did not. "Do you think I can manage it?"
"I'm not a fortune teller, Cassian." She said simply, turning back and continuing whatever conversation she'd been having with her mate.
"You didn't even try!" The blazing fire behind Feyre's eyes was enough to shut him up. A death glare is what it was. If looks could kill... well he's sure Nesta would've killed him a thousand times over. But this time it would've been Feyre sending him to an early grave. "Fine, fine. Whatever. Don't help me."
"Who is it?"
Ah. So the Spymaster didn't know. How delightful. He often knew far more about everything long before Cassian caught wind of it. His ego swelled up that little bit more. The grin plastered across his face most likely told that to Azriel already.
"I'm surprised your shadows haven't tried whispering it to you yet. Her name is-"
And suddenly Rhys was gone. Disappearing into nothing quickly enough to startle everyone. Especially Feyre.
---
Azriel slipped out of the room silently, unnoticed by anyone amidst the confusion. In all honesty it hurt. To be able to go unnoticed so easily. But it wasn't anything he wasn't used to. Besides, this would most likely be more of an issue. That's what he repeated to himself. Over and over again as his shadows licked at his skin. Pushing him out into the hallway.
Still whispering that he should enter. The door was left slightly ajar, wide enough for an eye to see.
Rhysand stood before the door, a woman before him. He couldn't quite get the angle right to see her but... his shadows were silent. Which was odd enough. He didn't recognise what he could see, or the way she held herself.
"Tahlia." His shadows nudged him at that. He waved them away. If they weren't going to be helpful and instead be as vague as possible, they weren't much use at all, nor very comforting.
"Rhysand. Helion sent me. Not that I wouldn't have come anyway." The woman- Tahlia- responded. Her voice... Azriel didn't want to think too much about it. Not about the gentle lilt. Definitely not.
"What is it?" It was a kind courtesy, Azriel thought, that was Rhys would politely stray away from prying through her mind. He must respect her enough. Trust her enough. Then how would he not have heard of her? Through Rhys. Through his shadows. Through anyone. It was like she didn't even exist until this very moment.
"The Mortal Queens. They plan to meet tomorrow on the continent and I don't think it's about their territories. He said you could get one of your spies there faster than he could." She rushed through the sentence. Couldn't get his spies there quick enough yet here she was.
The news wasn't exactly good either. How she knew... well Azriel didn't have an answer to that and the stubborn whispers seemed all too hushed on the subject. Like it wasn't their business telling him about her. He'd never been so completely frustrated by the infuriating things.
"Of course." His hands were out of his pockets a second later, showing his palms, assuring her of safety. Whether she knew it or not. It was a tactic Azriel had picked up not long after becoming acquainted with the High Lord.
"I can show you." Azriel saw her hair bob with a nod as she shuffled forward.
She was so close. He was so close to finally getting a glimpse. He ached, his chest actually ached with the frustration of it all. From what he could see, she was wearing white bell bottom trousers and a rich purple, cropped tunic. Sun kissed skin that looked far too soft to touch.
"I shouldn't be surprised that Helion taught you how to keep me out of your head." The humour and amusement was clear in the tone of his voice.
"People like you. Not just you I'm sure."
Rhys bowed his head lightly before placing a hand over his heart. "Thank you Tahlia."
The shadows were pushing at him again, as if trying to tell him he was running out of time. For what?
She leant down to do the same tilting just at the right angle for Azriel to see her. All of her. And... he didn't know what to make of it.
Any of it. He was staring and quite frankly he was glad there was no one around to witness it. It was intrigue he was sure. Not the fact that she looked so bright and otherworldly. Ethereal perhaps. Like she didn't quite belong.
Azriel didn't quite know where to look. Her face, her hands that were so clear of marks and scars, or the skin that had been revealed from bowing, or where her hair had parted with the tilt of her head to give him the perfect view of her neck.
And then her eyes were on him too.
Torn between being startled and weary, her eyes stayed on him moments longer.
It might've been an eternity.
He didn't move. Not an inch. Not a breath. Through fear alone that he'd scare her off.
And just as quickly as she appeared, she was gone. Disappearing into the light. Not darkness like winnowing... something else entirely.
"It's not like you to eavesdrop, Azriel." Rhys didn't turn. Still facing the door.
Azriel ignored the statement, pushing himself into the room where she had been not moments before. Clearing his throat before starting. "The Queens. Do you think they're plotting something?"
"I don't think Tahlia would've come to us if she didn't think it was urgent." He said finally facing him. Perhaps taking those few seconds to relay the message through to Feyre. Or composing himself, pulling up that mask of complete calm.
"You trust her."
A silent nod was the only response as he walked past. Back towards the rest of their family. Azriel followed, pausing only for a moment as he got back into the hallway, looking back into the now empty room, his shadows purring at him in response.
"What is it?" Mor and Cassian were on their feet as soon as he was back in the room.
"A messenger. Nothing to worry about. In fact," Rhys' smirk was nothing short of feral. It was then that Azriel realised he was massively out of a loop. And he was starting to piece the tidbits of information together. "It was Cassian's new friend."
He thought as much.
Cassian's face dropped instantly and his focus was gone. So much so he almost completely missed the chair when dropping back down. "You didn't let me say hi?" Azriel was quick to replace his amused smile with an eye roll.
"You didn't let any of us say hi!" Mor groaned theatrically before sidling back down in front of the flames
"Wouldn't want to scare her away too quickly." Azriel took the seat next to Cassian sticking his elbow into his gut.
"I'll have you know we've become fast friends." He mocked, pulling a face before ruining Azriel's hair.
"Wait, you said a minute ago you were in love with the poor girl. Now just friends?" Amren was quick to pick up on.
Feyre was laughing heartily a second later wagging a finger at him accusingly before settling down into Rhys' arms. "He's making it up as he goes along."
"She's lovely. And if Nesta asks, tell her we're in love."
"Does Tahlia know you're going around claiming to be a couple or did you think it wise not to indulge her in that particular piece of information?" Azriel ignored the nagging feeling in the back of his mind.
Tahlia was new. He didn't know her. Didn't even know when or if he'd ever see her again. Which didn't matter, he argued.
Besides, he was just joking. All of them were. Cassian wasn't actually serious about any of this.
Was he?