❝ 𝗗𝗢𝗟𝗟𝗙𝗔𝗖𝗘... 𓏴 ♢
ᶻ 𝘇 𐰁 . . . 𝗛𝗘𝗔𝗩𝗘𝗡 𝗛𝗘𝗟𝗣 those who fall for you ❜ ⸝⸝
⊹ . ◌ ༚ ˳ 🕳️⠀﹒⠀ ꙳ .
⌗ ; 𝗜 𝗔𝗣𝗢𝗟𝗢𝗚𝗜𝗦𝗘 ▬ ★ ??
TW: mentions of abuse (emotional and physical)
IT NEVER OCCURRED TO NAITO THAT KAYCEE CHEN MIGHT HAVE BEEN MORE TOXIC THAN HE REALISED. He had promised Midori to never keep anything from her, yet he was the first one to break that promise. Naito had secrets, many of them. A part of him wished to tell Midori, wished to let go of the burden that he carried every single day. But the other part of him argued that what he had experienced was only something women could experience. The words she used against him, the things she used to throw at him, the way her hand would meet his cheek, her fist his chest. Men couldn't experience that. They were physically bigger, thus, Naito was at fault.
Deep down, Naito knew that was wrong. Men could also be victims. But did the world believe that? By the looks of it, not everyone. Therefore, Naito made the decision that it was probably for the best to keep it to himself. Back in England, Naito had lost countless friends because of her. Kaycee had not only controlled his life, but the narrative too. He was the abuser, and she was the abused. That's how she had painted him to be.
To know that she was close made his heart stop. To know they were going to be inside the same building, to possibly hear her voice or be in the same room as her. Naito wasn't sure he could do that. The mere thought of her made his heart sink. He found it odd how one person could affect him that much. He was supposed to be strong. His parents raised him to protect Midori, to be strong for her.
That was wrong too. He had come to that realisation with Midori a few weeks ago. Children were supposed to be raised equitably, not one superior and the other inferior. The way they were raised made them believe that every child was supposed to be raised that way. And the way Kaycee treated Naito made him believe that every man should be treated that way. However, after seeing Heeseung and Mercy and Midori and Hyunjin, he noticed that it was not supposed to be like that. A man and a woman were supposed to respect one another, to love and understand.
If that was it then. . . perhaps it was his fault for not loving her enough ━ or perhaps he didn't respect her as much as he could. He was understanding so it could not be that, it had to be either of the former ones.
'Naito?' Sunoo asked, a hand on his shoulder pulling him out of his thoughts.
Head snapping towards him, Naito realised that he had been crying. Shit. Grabbing the hem of his sleeves, he quickly ran the fabric over his cheeks, drying the tears.
'Are you okay?' Sunoo continued, taking a seat beside him on the bed.
'Sunoo. . .' Naito uttered, realising that this was his chance. 'Can I tell you something?'
Worry stretched across Sunoo's face, a thousand thoughts running through his mind. Did he want to quit being an idol? Did he take his tteokbokki? Had he fallen in love and then broken up? Was a relative dead? Did his favourite character from his favourite series die?
'Anything,' Sunoo blurted out without a second thought.
'You. . . remember the girl I was with?'
'Yeah,' Sunoo nodded.
'She didn't treat me very well. She not only hurt Midori but she hurt me as well,' Naito said, his heart beating hard against his chest, nervosity clouding his mind. What if Sunoo didn't believe him? Would he think of him as a big wuss now because he couldn't stand against a girl?
'Hurt you?' Sunoo frowned. 'In what way?'
'She would tell me things. . . that I didn't deserve anything, that I was ugly and wouldn't succeed in life. I didn't treat her well enough, I was a horrible boyfriend for not buying her gifts or showering her with love, for not paying for her clothes when we went shopping. . .' Naito trailed off, eyes staring at the floor, unable to meet Sunoo's eyes. His body felt heavy and Naito feared he was going to break apart.
'Naito. . .' Sunoo sighed, pulling him in for a hug.
'She threw things at me and sometimes she slapped me and hit me. . .'
Sunoo let out a breath he didn't know he had been holding, arms instinctively tightening around Naito.
'Have you told the others?'
'Only that she hurt Midori when she pushed her into that table,' Naito answered. 'I don't think I'm strong enough to tell them.'
'I can tell them,' a new voice spoke up, the door opening. Ni-ki walked into the room, a look of pity spreading across his face. 'I'm sorry, I was going to get my phone and I heard you two and I━'
'It's okay,' Naito reassured him, forcing a smile to his lips. 'It. . . makes it easier that one more knows.'
'Did you ever hit her?' Sunoo asked, cursing at himself right after for the stupid question.
'Never,' Naito answered. 'I held her down when she got aggressive but I never━' He swallowed the lump in his throat. '━but I would never ever hurt her.'
Ni-ki sat down beside him, hand on his shoulder.
'Do you want me to tell the others?' He asked. 'I think it would be better if you did it yourself but if you don't have the energy to━'
'I'll do it,' Naito said, looking into Ni-ki's eyes. 'I can do it.'
'I'll go get them,' Ni-ki told him before swiftly walking out of the room, getting the rest of their members.
'I don't know what to say, Naito. . .' Sunoo admitted, letting go of Naito but keeping his arm around his shoulders.
'You don't need to say anything,' Naito muttered, feeling at ease for finally being able to tell someone. 'I just needed you to listen.'
Sunoo nodded. 'I'm always here to listen.'
Glancing at him, Naito gave him a thankful nod. 'Thank you.'
﹙★﹚
'Are you mad at me Midori?' Naito asked, voice low. 'Mad at me for not telling you?'
'Mad at you?' Midori exclaimed with slight bewilderment, sitting down on the floor in front of him, hand finding his cheek. 'Why would I ever be mad at you?'
'I promised to never keep secrets,' Naito said, eyes dropping.
After having told the rest of the group, Naito asked Midori to stay with him, the rest of the members quickly scrambling back to doing their own thing, not wanting to upset Naito further.
'I won't crucify you or anything. I understand, Naito, and I'm sorry that happened to you,' Midori told him, giving him a firm nod. 'Okay? Everything will be all right. We'll fix this like we always do.'
'You don't need to. It's my mess to fix,' Naito argued.
'But I want to. I want to help you and I want you to be happy.'
'Thank you, Midori,' Naito thanked her, words coming deep from his heart.
'Thank you too, Naito.'