I've never felt sicker than ever until after reading the comment section. Ironically, these same comments, helped me go to sleep.
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I woke up in the middle of the night feeling just as sick as before. I could feel my throat all chocked up, while it felt like my stomach was twisting in 15 different ways.
I got out of the bed, not daring to disturb Kotarou who is in the same bad as me. I walked up to the window and started up at the moon. I just now realized that the window was unlocked and one could sneak in and out of the room.
I remembered that there was a park nearby, maybe that will help me.
I got a pair of shoes that I had already in my room, so I didn't have to go all the way to the front door to get my shoes and accidentally make some noise. I made sure that Kotarou was fast asleep. I put a pillow next to him, making it seem that it was me instead.
I tip toed to the window after putting the shoes on, and as quiet as possible I open the window. I saw that it was quite cold outside, so I had to hurry to exit the room, so none of the cold wind could enter the room.
One leg followed the other as I escaped through the window.
Luckily, I made no sound and woke no one up during so. I quietly close the window back up and start making my way to the nearby park.
The street was quiet as I walked down the sidewalk. The cold air ran through my hair, making me feel like I was staring in a music video scene. I kept my head down looking at the sidewalk, keeping my steps in a pattern for every block that I walked on.
After a few minutes I made it to the park. I saw a tree that could hide me from drive by cars, so I decided to walk up towards it to clear my thoughts.
Unlucky me though, someone was already there.
The person sitting there was staring at the moon and got startled by my sudden footsteps.
"I'm sorry!" I apologize.
"It's fine, don't worry about it." The boy replys with.
There was an awkward silence and tension between us, until he decided to speak up.
"So... what brings you here?" He asks.
I wasn't sure if I wanted to open up to a total stranger on why I was there, but yet again he seems like a middle schooler so there's no chance we may ever meet again.
"You can sit besides me you know, but you don't have to." He offers.
I take his request and sit next to him.
"So? How old are ya? You look like a high schooler, what year are you in?" He asks intrigued.
"I'm in my 2nd year of high school." I tell him.
"Me too!" He exclaimed.
I was shocked by his response, because he literally looks like a middle schooler.
"Shocking right? So why are you here tonight?" He asks again.
"Oh, I felt sick."
"Shouldn't you be in bed then?" He asks while he holds a blunt in his hands.
"Wait quick question do you mind if?" He says while point at the blunt asking if it's ok for him to smoke it.
I nod my head giving him permission.
He takes a hit and blows out the smoke. He then takes a joint out and offers it to me.
"Do you want?" He offers.
I thought about it, and took the offer. I thought I stopped smoking, but maybe this one time it's ok.
"Yeah, if that's ok with you."
"Yeah it's fine, that's why I offered, either way I don't enjoy joints that much."
He hands me the joint and lights it for me.
I bring it up to my mouth and blow the smoke out, in a circle.
"Whoa that's cool, watch this." He says.
The takes out a piece of gum from his pocket and starts chewing, after chewing it he puts chapstick on and then hits the blunt.
There I saw him open his mouth, blowing a bubble with the bubble gum and trapping the blunts' smoke inside it, and closing the bubble with this lips.
I saw the bubble made out of gum and smoke float up to the air, it was cool. I wish I could do that, but nah, this was a one time thing. Eventually, it popped and the smoke trapped inside got released.
"That was so cool!" I compliment him.
"Ha thank you!"
"But now, what brought you here at this time of night?" He adds.
I took a hit of the joint before answering.
"As I told you I feel sick, but not in an actual type of way, no. My stomach just feels like it's doing cartwheels and my throat it feels like it's clogged."
"Did something happen?"
"Yeah..."
"My relationship and I got outted at school today, yesterday technically." I tell him.
"What! Why would someone do that?"
"I don't know, and I wasn't even out, sexuality, type of way... and it was all so sudden." I pause taking another hit.
While having the joint in my mouth, I just realized that I just told this stranger about me, what if they hate me now?
"What's your sexuality? I'm bi and I currently have a boyfriend." He says.
"I'm gay."
I was relieved to see that the boy next to me was also part of the LGBTQ+ Community.
"How did you get outted?" He asks.
I tell him the whole story about the post and the comments, and how people were either fetishizing, being gaycist¹, or just making jokes about us in general and people hardly supporting us.
"Damn bro, I don't know what to tell ya, but hey, it's not the end of the world, no. Yeah, you got outted to your whole school, but who cares?! You at the moment yeah, but who will care in 15 years when we're legally adults and have full time jobs by then and staring our own families. Here, let me give you my instagram, so we can chat there and you can text me if someone ever physically hurt you, I will have my crew pull up and jump them." He says confidently.
I give him my instagram and he adds me back, then and there, and I start thinking of the words he just told me. Maybe I shouldn't really care about others opinions.
"Crew?" I ask curiously.
"Yeah, my volleyball team."
"You're on a volleyball team?"
"The school's volleyball team to be exact! I'm the libero!" He states.
I look at him in 'awe' not knowing what the fuck a libero is.
We kept talking more and more but this time on why he was here too during the middle of the night.
I got to know more about him, like he got to know more about me. We had laughs during the conversations.
The moon was now directly above us now, since it was 3 A.M. and two complete strangers were sharing their life stories to each other.
"Oh! I forgot to ask! Are you in a club?" He asks.
"Yeah... I'm in a daycare babysitting club." I say kinda emberassed.
"Really? How is it like? Why did you pick that club? Is it fun?" The boy next to me kept asking questions about the club, which made me sort of happy to see that someone cared.
"Well, to start off with I was forced to be in the club, because the person who took in my little brother and I in after our parents died from a plane accident, wanted me to be the first official member in the club since no one else would join, they're the Chairlady of the school, meaning that she owns it and everything." I start off with.
"You're guardian owns a whole school!?"
"Heh, yeah."
"So basically, during my free time I have to dedicate to be there at all costs in hopes that someone else would join, which my boyfriend became the 2nd member this year while being in the baseball club."
"How is it like working with small children?"
"Exhausting, but fun. It's fun seeing the kids play around with each other and have a good time, but exhausting since I have to make sure they don't get hurt, because the adult in the club is always sleeping."
The boy nods in understandment. The sun was about to rise up, meaning that it was time to go back home since we had school to attend in a few hours.
"Well then, I hope we cross paths again." He says.
"Yeah, I hope so too. Also, we never gave each other our names."
"You can call me Yuu." He says bowing.
"Ryuuichi." I respond.
We give each other one last goodbye and bow at each other before heading our separate ways.
I make my way back the house, in hopes that everyone was still sleeping. I make it to the window of my room and notice that Kotarou was still asleep, which I was grateful for.
I quietly open the window and hop inside not making noise, and quietly shut it behind me.
Maybe I should go to school today. I shouldn't let what other people think win over me.
I got in bed taking my shoes off, and then heard my alarm go off, telling me to get ready for school.
I made it seem like I just woke up even though I only slept for like 1-2 hours.
"Morning Kotarou." I say greeting him.
He lazily leans in on me, not wanting to get up.
"C'mon we have school today, lets go get ready."
I pick Kotarou up on one shoulder, while I picked out his clothes.
I quickly changed him, and I headed to the bathroom to change into my school's uniform.
I do my usual routine by brushing my hair and teeth, before going back to Kotarou.
I made sure to walk to school later than usual, to see what people's reactions would be seeing me after seeing the post.
I grab my supplies for school, including my lunchboxes, and Kotarou.
I stepped out of the house, feeling weird that, Hayato wasn't here to pick me up and walk to school with me today, even though I did tell him I wasn't going.
"Where's Taka-San?" Kotarou asks.
"Oh, I told Hayato to go on without us, you'll see them at school when we arrive."
He nods in understandment and starts walking to school.
I made it to school seeing that it was already filled with people, even though it's not in session yet.
I change my shoes and put my items in my locker before heading inside the building. I could feel the stares of people going through my back. I wanted to crouch down in a hole and die, but I can't let their words get to me.
I grab Kotarou's hand and make my way to the daycare room, telling myself that it was because that I had a child holding my hand, and that's why they were staring. As I walked down the hallways I made sure to keep my posture up and strong, until I encountered Hayato who was talking to his friends.
"I thought you said you weren't going to come today? Hayato asked.
I really wish that Hayato ignored me, and kept speaking to his friend group because the second he spoke, I lost all my confidence.
"Oh yeah... I changed my mind last minute." I respond putting my hand behind my neck.
"Hey Ryuu-Kun we supp-" A friend if Hayato was about to say before I cut him off.
"Well, I have to go drop Kotarou off, I'll see you later." I tell him.
I quickly made my way to the daycare room, letting out a breath of air that I didn't know I was holding in.
"That was something..." I mumble to myself walking inside the room.
"What was?" Yoshihito-San asked.
"Oh nothing."
Since I came to school at a later time, I was surprised on how much earlier the bell rang.
I made my way to class, anxiously wondering what people would do during that time to me.
"Hey." Hayato says sneaking up behind me.
I jumped in reaction.
"Why is our class so far from the daycare room..." I complain.
"It's really not that far." He says.
After a few more steps, I noticed that people were staring at us, I thought it was because we got outted, no, it was because Hayato was holding holding my hand.
"Hayato!" I call out in realization.
"Huh?"
"I... This? What?" I say not being able to put words together, but made sure he knew what I was talking about.
"People already know we're together so why hide it at this point?" He says.
I hide my face from emberassment, until I heard a voice behind me.
"That's PDA." A girl with a familiar voice shouts.
I turn around to see it was Maria.
I just want to go to class, why is time so slow? How has the bell not rung yet?
I ignore her and let go of Hayato's hand and pace to my classroom.
I entered the classroom, and find my seat and wait for class to start.
Everyone was sitting in their seats including Hayato, and the teacher started the lesson.
My mind wondered off most of the time, having throwbacks of the night before and my new friend? That I encountered. Would I ever see him again? I hope I do. He seemed cool, but for the most part energetic, but that's a part of his personality I guess.
The first 2 classes went by pretty fast, and now it was break time.
"Hey Ryuuichi." Hayato says poking my back, since he sits behind me.
"The project." I suddenly remembered.
"Don't worry, we already presented it, we got an A on it, don't you remember?"
"I guess I forgot."
There was an awkward silence of us not knowing on what to talk about. Then his friend group came up where we were sitting at and started speaking to one another. I tuned their voices out since they were talking about sports and I don't have knowledge in them.
I decided to take my phone out and check out Yuu's instagram page to get to know more about him and what he posts.
I click on his most recent post, which happened to take place a while back. It showed him and his boyfriend at the skating ring. With a funny caption that say that the lady on the front desk mistook their ages. Not going to lie, I would too because his boyfriend looks 30 while he looks 13.
I chuckle at my thoughts drawing attention towards me.
"Who's that?" Hayato asks, looking at my phone.
"Oh, it's a friend that I met the other day."
"Really? How did you guys meet?" He says raising an eyebrow.
"Hush, you ask too many questions, but don't worry he already has a significant other." I tell Hayato not wanting to tell him the truth.
The group of boys sat there also wanting to know, who Hayato and I were talking about.
Hayato was not satisfied with my answer and so weren't his friends.
"Oh my god, you guys are so nosey." I joke out, mainly referring to his friends.
"Hey!"
"But if you want to know so badly, sit down so I can tell you guys." I give in.
Hi group of friends took seats from different desks around them and sat down intrigued in the story. Even Hayato looked interested.
"So first of all, Yuu and I met at the park yesterday." I start off with.
"But didn't you stay at home after I dropped you off?" Hayato asks, referring to yesterday.
"Yeah."
"Then?"
"I snuck out." I put out blankly.
I watched the boys surrounding me eyes go wide not knowing that I could do such a thing.
"Am I really that innocent that you guys don't believe I can do such thing?" I say.
The boys nod in responds some even opening their mouth and saying 'yeah.'
"Wow, rude." I say rolling my eyes.
"But I intentionally just wanted to hang out at the park by myself, I didn't mean to hang out with him, I didn't even know he was there. You see, I was going to sit by a tree and just stare at the moon, but the tree I picked was a already occupied and that's when I met him." I continue.
As I kept talking, Hayato noticed something sticking out of my pocket and pulls it out.
I ignore what he did, thinking that it was just a small candy wrapper and go on with the story, I fiddle around some parts not mentioning the smoking part, and finish the story. The boy around me nodded in understandment.
"You're a good story teller." One of them says.
"Yeah! You should tell us more in the future!" Another one says.
They all agreed with each other and I just giggled.
"Did you two do anything else?" Hayato asks.
Not knowing what he was talking about I shook my head no.
"Really?" He says.
Again I shook my head no.
Once again, his friend group was intrigued on what Hayato was going to say, because he didn't talk that much.
"The what's this?" He says pulling out an outdone joint from his sleeve.
"Hayato!" I exclaimed.
"You're going to get in trouble put that away." I said in a lower tone.
He puts it away, and I sit there dumbfounded that I forgot to throw the used joint away.
His friend group make gasping noises acting as if I committed a crime.
"So are you not going to explain?" Hayato says.
"Explain what?"
"On why you had a blunt in your pocket."
"It's a joint actually." I say correcting him.
"It's not helping your point."
"What did you two actually do?" He adds.
I give in and finally tell him the parts of the story that I left out even the bubble gum part.
"... and then he did this cool trick with bubble gum and smoke! I wish I could do it..." I said.
"What do you mean by wish!?"
"Damn Ryuu-Kun I never knew you had that in you." A guy says in the group.
"Yeah that's because we've never talked before." I said while being sassy.
"Well anyways, get back to your seats." I tell them as they groan because the bell just rang.
"This conversation is not over." Hayato says.
"There's literally nothing else to say though." I respond, as I turn my seat to the correct correction.
Class started as usual. That's when it hit me. No one has come up to me -besides a friend of Hayato in the morning that I cut off- and talked about the post that went around school like wildfire yesterday. Did they not care?
I shrug off the thought and was glad that no one really cared about my relationship with Hayato.
Or so I thought.
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Gaycist¹: Basically means that they don't support the lgbt, basically being homophobic, but I didn't use 'homophobic' because phobic means being afraid of something and in this case people aren't afraid of the gays they just don't support them.
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Did I forget to publish this?