Fire and Ice (BoyXBoy)

Fire and Ice

"Yuu why are you so weird? Stop it already!"

I sat alone in my hotel room that night, as was per usual of me on nights like this. The tears wouldn't stop flowing from my eyes, making new wet trails even over the old dry ones as his irritated voice echoed in my head.

It hurt so much. It hurt so so much...

All I ever wanted was to get my feelings across to him... Let him know how much it aches just to be near him, to look at him, or even to think about him. But he just... Brushes it away.

Sometimes I think... Maybe it would have been better if I never developed feelings at all, or... Hell if I had never even met him in the first place. These misplaced affections will get me nowhere, absolutely nowhere. I couldn't touch that cold, distant beauty with a ten foot pole even if I wanted to.

"Guess that's why they call him the ice prince, ain't it?" I laughed sarcastically and stifled a sob. "He sure does suit it well..."

I sighed and lay flat against the bed I claimed in the room I was, unfortunately, forced to share with Uruha. I came back early, not wanting to face the guys while they all went out to eat after our live was over. Wasn't feeling well, I said. And it was the truth. My heart was sick, my soul was broken, and my very being felt like it was drowning. I was suffocating.

The cold room gave my overheated body some comfort, and I nestled against the cooled sheets away from the bed Uruha would use and towards the window, the drapes pulled back to show the glimmering lights of Mexico City.

Those strangers... Living the way they always do. Not having to worry about feelings or... Pent up problems. Not having to be reminded constantly of an emotionally draining love interest and the physical damage that comes with it.

I have spent nights thinking about him, lost so much that sometimes I forgot to eat... I wonder how much I weigh now. Eating hasn't exactly been easy lately.

I just love him so much... But if he doesn't see it then I have no choice but to accept that. It doesn't mean I'll take it well though... Maybe this band will suffer because of me?

"I wonder what would happen if I started to drink," I mused out loud and hiccuped through my cries. "Maybe it would help me to forget everything..."

"Then you're a goddamned idiot."

I shot up to find Uruha in the room... When did he get here?? And why does he look so upset..??

"Uruha..."

"No, Yuu," he growled furiously. "Don't you ever dare say that again. Do you understand me?"

The initial shock wore off and I only shrugged and laid back down, trying to hide even more tears as I sighed heavily. The look of his beautiful angelic face marred by anger made me sick to my stomach.

"As if the ice prince would care what happened to me, a lowly peasant," I muttered. I heard him scoff roughly, thinking he left it alone until his nails dug into my shoulder and forced me to face him. When I did... My stomach dropped. 

He was crying... But why??

"Yuu please stop it," he hissed but with pain in his voice. "Please, don't... Don't do that to yourself... Please don't..."

"Kou-kun... Why are you the one who is upset here?"

He sniffled and smiled down at me.

"Maybe the ice prince finally needs someone to make him melt."

What is he talking about?

"Kouyou please, stop with the riddles already," I whined and pulled his fingers away so they wouldn't go any deeper. ""Why are you suddenly so worried about me or what I do?"

He sighed and sat up and away from me.

"Do you really want to forget me that badly..?"

So he heard me... God I am an idiot...

"Kouyou... Of course I don't want to forget You. But... I also don't want to remember all the pain I've went through."

"Because of me?"

How could I possibly answer that..?

"Kou-"

"Yuu I have to tell you something."

Oh dear... 

"Wh... What is it?" I asked hesitantly. He twiddled his fingers and looked back at me with gentle sad eyes.

"Earlier tonight, at the live... That almost-kiss that I ruined..."

"Yeah..?" 

"I'm sorry," was all he whispered, and he started to cry again, and I immediately went to his side.

"No Kouyou," I chided. "It was my fault... I should not have tried to kiss you like that. I know how you are about stuff like that but... I..."

"Stop Yuu. I am saying sorry because... Well I... I wanted to kiss you. But all those people were watching and my nerves got the best of me in the end... Please don't forget about me okay?"

What... He actually wanted me to do that to him? Is... Is this for real..? I swallowed hard and felt him lean into my arms.

"Kouyou, do you really mean that?"

"Yes, Yuu... Because I love you... I really really love you and I want you to continue remembering me enough to kiss me... Please..."

I didn't let him cry about it anymore. I had my answer, and it was the one I had been waiting for eleven years to hear. More tears burst from my eyes and I cradled him to me, smiling and petting his hair. The suffocating feeling was gone, and I felt like a huge weight had been lifted from my soul.

"So I finally melted the ice prince's cold hard heart," I whispered softly against his hair. He giggled softly and wrapped hsi arms around me for comfort. 

"Yes... Because you have the kindest, warmest heart of anyone I have ever met in my life..."

This alone made me smile even wider.

"I guess I really am a star after all..."

"Idiot," he mumbled through a sob induced laugh. I pressed his thumb to my palm and felt him scoot even closer. 

"I love you, my ice prince."

 "I love you too, my superstar."

As he said this, I was finally able to steal a kiss from his lips. Which surprisingly, were actually really warm after all.

~FIN~