Jads daughter

Mental issues

Hi guys it's me so I am going to continue this story but I want to talk about something that is going on with me right now and I need help. I have been very depressed lately. I fake smile for everything. It's like no one notices I'm around like honestly I wanna be dead. Crazy right, honestly I don't feel pretty enough. I feel like I have failed as a child, student, sister, friend, and  I've probably been the reason everything always messes up. I wanna go really badly. I feel like I'm drowning in my own tears and no one is there to save me. I cry myself to sleep almost every night. Just the other day I finally started to get happy and better but my dad started getting on my nerves and a lot happened in that day and everything went back to normal just sad and lonely. I'm so mean to others and I feel like no one cares but I am only mean so people don't get into my life and leave. I don't know my future but I feel as if everything is going downhill. I don't know what is holding me back from going but the only thing that is are my friends. Is it better to go or stay pls help me. :(

(Should I do a face reveal but if so don't hate I know I am ugly but if I do pls don't hate.)