Drowning

prologue

It's been 32 days, Mads.

It's been a month and a day since your beautiful, kind, blue eyed self went away, and I still can't describe how I feel.

The only word I can use is empty but when I say that, my therapist says that that's not how I feel, but I mean, what does she know? Her best friend didn't kill herself unexpectedly a month and a day ago.

I know when we got into arguments I said I wish you were dead to myself, or I would be glad when you decided to stay at your friend's house for a week at a time. But now all I want to do is go back in time and wish I spent every minute available with you.

I'm sorry, and I'm empty, and I miss you so much my insides ache just thinking about it.

Sometimes when I think about you, I get this feeling in my bones. I feel like water is filling up in my lungs and I yearn for just one more minute to tell you that I love you.

I wish I could we say we're all doing fine, but in reality, we're all just really drowning.

~

hey I'm back!! yes I know I already started writing this but I couldn't stand it so I decided to rewrite it oops.

vote and comment for the first chapter!!