{TsukkiYama}I Hope the night sky is pretty wherever you are

Chapter 5

The five stars on his wrist are gone when Kei wakes up.
Which isn't a problem, since it would've been awkward to explain anyway.
But Kei sort of misses them.

When he sees Yamaguchi that morning, on their walk to school, he notices how his eyes look brighter.

'Slept well?' he asks.

Yamaguchi hums in response.

⋆*☆⋆*

In the locker room, after practice, everyone is goofing off and yelling loudly about their difficult teenage lives.
Kei sneaks a glance at Yamaguchi's body. Not the creepy kind, but the "I want to know if you've written with your soulmate kind".
Which probably looks a lot like the creepy kind, Kei thinks, as his eyes stray a bit too long on Yamaguchi's back.
Be real, Kei. He can't even write there.

Of course Yamaguchi turns around now.

Somehow Kei manages to sound casual as he asks, 'Did you finish reading the English assignment?'

Yamaguchi pulls his shirt over his head, which makes his hair stick out at weird angles and it's so ridiculously cute that Kei's almost offended.

'I did, sort of, but I still haven't warmed up to him. How about you, Tsukki?'

Bending over to put on his shoes so he doesn't keep staring, Kei murmurs, 'I can somewhat relate to him.'

'What?' Yamaguchi asks.

Kei starts tying his shoelaces. 'He wrote: "the fault is not in our star-'

'What?' Yamaguchi asks again, leaning forward trying to hear him better.

Why do his teammates have to be so loud and irritating?

He repeats, 'The fault is not in our stars-'

'Sorry Tsukki, I can't hear you, their singing is really loud.'

Kei looks up. 'The fault is not in our stars, but in... ourselves...'

Their faces are close.
Really. Close.
As in slow-motion, Kei watches Yamaguchi blink slowly. And it feels like he's holding his breath. Yamaguchi's eyes flicker from his left eye to his right, holding Kei's gaze for what feels like decades, but is probably only a few seconds before he leans back a little.

Kei exhales.
Yeah, he was definitely holding his breath.

'But that's so pessimistic.'

While Kei was having a reality check on his crush, Yamaguchi apparently continued to function like a normal person. He's looking curiously at him.

Kei shrugs. 'It means that we can take our lives into our own hands. We don't have to rely on "fate"...'

Understanding fills Yamaguchi's eyes. 'Or the universe,' he finishes the sentence.

Kei nods.

Having both finished changing, they grab their bags and start walking home.
Their silence isn't awkward, but Kei can feel it's contemplative.
On both sides.
And he doesn't know what Yamaguchi's thinking about, but he can guess it's about soulmates.
Because he's thinking about it too.

Kei resists the urge to look at his wrist where the five stars had been.
He doesn't know why he misses them so much, but seeing those stars on his wrist just felt right. It's something that's always been in his life, stars, and they will continue to be there after he isn't. He's been fascinated with them for almost all his life.
He can still remember all those nights, when he'd gotten his first telescope, watching stars with Yamaguchi. Staying up way too late. Eating snacks. Talking about everything and nothing. Looking at the night sky, and thinking all those dots looked like the freckles on Yamaguchi's cheeks.
He feels himself beginning to smile.
It's what he said when they painted the night sky together.

'Good day today?' Yamaguchi asks softly.

Kei makes a nondescript sound and looks at his friend.

Yamaguchi smiles at him, and so Kei returns, 'Good day today?'

'Mm, I like just walking. No need to talk or anything.'

At this, Kei hums in response. He does too.

'You know,' Yamaguchi slowly starts, 'Buddhists say if you meet someone and your heart pounds, your hands shake, and your knees go weak, that's not the one. They say when you meet your soulmate, you'll feel calm. No anxieties.'

Away from their yelling teammates, in the quiet outskirts of town, Kei closes his eyes for a few seconds. The air smells crisp and clean, it being a clear winter day. He can feel Yamaguchi bump into him every so often.
He's warm when the air's cold.

Kei breathes in. And out.
Tries to understand that the universe really picked the perfect person for everyone.
But he can't.
He can't understand how there could be anyone he'd ever feel more calm with than Yamaguchi.

He can't understand how anyone other than Yamaguchi could be his soul mate.

Kei breathes in. And out.

'That sounds nice,' he replies.

⋆*☆⋆*

What's that thing called
where your crush likes you back?

Kei scoffs as he sees there isn't really any space left on his right arm to write the answer, so he opens his palm and clumsily writes,

Oh yes, your imagination.

He closes his fist.
The answer disappears, making his question seem hopeful. Why is it that when he's writing to this other person, he's always so melodramatic?
Must be because he only writes when his hormonal teenage body gives him an extra shot of angst and self-pity.

Maybe it's better if you went to sleep

Wow. Kei feels offended.

You're saying I'm not entertaining?

He scribbles the words on the other side of his left arm, taking care to write smaller.
It takes a few minutes for his so-, for them to reply, so Kei picks up his phone to look at the time. Okay, fair point, it is nearly ten.
He should get ready for bed or something.
Then a small screen pops up on his phone, telling him he's received a message from Yamaguchi.

[from: Yama]

whatr u doing tsukki?

Writing to my so-called soulmate, is what he's supposed to say. But let's be real.

[to: Yama]
Nothing much. Why?

When he drops his phone beside him, he sees that they've written back.
It's a long answer.

I've been in love with the idea of you for all my life, and I'm sure you're a wonderful person
but maybe it's time you start acting like one

What.

Kei's speechless.
Thank the stars that his mobile flashes just then, indicating that he's received another message.

[from: Yama]
want to hang out?

His gaze flickers between his arm and his mobile phone.
It's not weird for them to hang out this late. Usually Yamaguchi comes over to his house and normally, Kei would love to spend more time with Yamaguchi... but.
But.
He looks at his arm.
He squints at the words.
but maybe it's time you start acting like one

If Yamaguchi comes over, he'll see the marks on his arm. He can try and cover them up with a long-sleeved sweater, but that's not a foolproof plan.
Kei sighs.
He- He can't believe what's he's going to do now.

[to: Yama]
No, sorry. I think I'm going to call it an early night.

That's it.
He's officially the worst best friend ever.
He has just blown Yamaguchi off because of his irritated soulmate.

With a frown on his face he searches for some free space on his arm and he writes back.

Okay. Fair point. What do you propose I do?

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