The Runner Girl | Remus Lupin

~ decisions made for me ~

"Your brother didn't get killed 6 years ago." My mother starts.

"Clearly." I respond and she sighs at me, before looking to my father. He nods his head at her and she continues talking.

"Instead, he got sent to your cousin's house. He went to live with the Blacks, specifically, Orion and Walburga Black. But they couldn't properly give him the right upbringing, so he went to live with your friend Narcissa and her family, Cygnus and Druella Black. They brought him up in the traditional way for a pureblood whilst you stayed here and I raised you.

"To keep the two of you separate, Cayden went to Hogwarts and I homeschooled you. He was sorted into Slytherin and your father would spend the holidays making sure that he was getting raised correctly. At the start of the school year, he got sent on a mission by the Dark Lord which meant that he would be gone by Christmas until Easter.

"That's when I owled the headmaster, asking if you could go to the school after Christmas. He came here as you remember and offered you a place. Cayden came home early and went to find you after he found out that you are alive. The Dark Lord had told him and he needed to see it to believe it.

"He found me straight after seeing you and told me of the Dark Lord's plan. The Dark Lord wishes for you to join him, become a spy at Hogwarts. He is coming here in 2 days to inspect you. Your father already gave permission for you to become a d-d-death-" My mother can't say the words, so I finish for her.

"A death eater." I whisper, my thoughts racing.

"You becoming a death eater will uphold our family honour. From now on, you will need to spend more time with people of our kind and not people like that mudblood Anderson." My father spits. I go to defend LIa, but a voice in the back of my head tells me not to.

"I don't have a say in this, do I?" I ask.

"I'm afraid not." My brother replies.

Looking at each of them, I get up from the able and head straight up to my room. I grab out a piece of parchment and I write to Cissy, telling her all of what I've learnt before lying on my bed in defeat.

***

The Dark Lord came and initiated me into his cult of lunatics, burning his horrific mark into my forearm. I desperately try to scrub it off as soon as he leaves, but there's nothing that I can do.

I get told that I have to complete a task for him to confirm my allegiance to him, but I dread to think of what he requires me to do. They say that it won't happen until I can do magic outside of school which is only 5 months away as I turn 17 in September.

Out of fear, I write to someone whom I trust. Minerva McGonagall.

Dear Professor McGonagall,

I apologise for disturbing your Easter break, but I need to arrange a meeting with you when I come back to school in a week's time. It's about something important, something that I can't discuss over a letter in case it gets intercepted.

Please reply to me soon - the owl knows only to deliver to me and make sure that I am the one receiving it.

Kindest regards,
Gwendolyn Mulciber

I seal the letter up with the green wax that always gets kept in my room and hand it to my owl. She takes the letter happily and flies off to Hogwarts, her wings spread wide as she soars through the air.

Just then, I hear a knock at my door and I make sure that the secret library is sealed up. I open the door to see my newly rediscovered brother standing there, his hands awkwardly crossed in front of him.

"Can we talk?" He asks, nerves laced in his voice.

"I don't see why not Cay, come in." I reply, moving out of the way of the door to let him in.

He walks over to my bed, sitting down and looking around with a slight marvel.

"They told me you got killed." He says quietly.

"Killed? How?"

"Bleeding from wounds caused by muggles. I think it was to spur hate for muggles and it worked. I can't stand them." He mutters.

"They told me you got killed because you knew too much. Never told me how though. I guess they didn't think I cared enough." I look at him, curiosity in my eyes to see his reaction, but his face is blank, unreadable.

Then suddenly, he laughs. A small chuckle escapes from his mouth and then it turns into an uncontrollable laugh.

"What is it?" I ask.

"It's kind of funny how they thought that you wouldn't care but I would. Everyone would assume that you are the emotionless one because of the additional influence from father and they're correct. Yet, you've already expressed more emotions in the last three days then I've ever seen you express." He responds.

"You used to run around the garden, getting chased by mother's weird creatures, and every time you fell over, you cried and mother would comfort you. But if I fell and started to cry, I'd be scolded, because I needed to be seen but not heard." I tell him. "I got taught to wipe my face clean off emotions and to turn them off at any moment. Yet, now I go to school and have friends, I have to learn to show them. It's strange."

"Yes, I heard about your little group of friends. Although I don't think that "little" is the right word for it. From what I hear, you're rather popular." A smirk covers his face and a hint of proudness makes its way into his eyes, something he'd never admit. 

"I suppose so." I grin. Lying back on my bed, I look up at the ceiling which is covered with glow in the dark stars. "It's nice to have you back, Cay." 

"It's nice to have you back to Gwennie." He lies down with me and I fall asleep with his arms around me in a protective hug. 

This is the boy that I know.