Forbidden- A Harry Styles Story

Epilogue-77

"Please, just leave, Erin. I know what you've been doing and I don't want you here...please, just leave," he begged, his eyes starting to tear up, as if sending me away caused him physical pain. 

"You shouldn't have to be alone," I said quietly, shoving my hands in the pockets of my jeans. 

"Who said I'm alone?  Harper could be here, or-or Louis. Why do you assume I'm lonely and lost without you?  Just because I'm not with you, doesn't mean I don't have other options or other friends," he snapped at me, making me take another slow step back. 

"I'm aware of your options, alright?  All I know is that they don't understand the loss of family like I do.  Please, just let me in. Let me help you and take care of you and look after you. I miss you and I still love you. Just give me another chance," I begged. His eyes softened again, my plea unusually getting to him. 

"I've given you so many chances, Erin. And we took a break...and it was good for us. I think it'd be good to be done forever..." he replied, shaking his head and running his hands through his hair roughly. 

His statement broke my heart and my voices immediately exploded into a shouting match. 

We told you. 

I TOLD YOU. 

Just let it go, Erin. 

He's too good for you. 

He finally sees you the way you see yourself. 

"I love you, though," I protested, making him sigh deeply as he shook his head and closed his eyes before opening them slowly again. His hand was on his forehead as he looked at me, making me believe that he was most likely sick of my voice and my begging for forgiveness. 

"Just because we love each other doesn't mean we should be together. I thought that you would know this by now. You loved Jack and Kai but you had enough sense to put a bullet in Kai's head, so where's your sense now?  We tried it, you fucked up, and it didn't work out. We should leave it at that before we both say something that we regret," he suggested, starting to close the door on me once again. I let out a growl of frustration as I stopped the door from closing once again, making him let out a growl of anger. 

"But you forgave Zayn. Why not me?" I asked angrily, making him roll his eyes, his mean nature coming out once again. I was wondering vaguely where his sympathy, empathy, and caring nature had gone...but he was probably fairly drunk and that outweighed everything that he had done when he was sober. 

"I don't have to kiss Zayn. I don't have to see Zayn every day or talk to him if I don't want to. I don't live with Zayn and have sex with Zayn. That's why I forgave him. I forgave him because he's a friend, not the person I am in love with.  I can't overlook it with you, Erin. I just can't. Seeing the image of you and him in my head is haunting and that's what I see every time I see your face. Maybe it'll heal with time, but it hasn't so far. So if that's a good enough reason, can you please get the fuck out of my face?" I swallowed a lump in my throat as Harry snapped at me, the anger in his eyes reminding me of Kai. 

"I miss you, though,"

His sigh was deep and annoyed as he closed his eyes. 

"I'm not going to lie and tell you I don't miss our relationship either, I do, I really do. But I just can't do this anymore, Erin. I can't go through the same thing over and over and over again.  My family is dead and I need to be alone to process that.  I can't deal with you and with the grief at the same time. So please, just give it a fucking rest. I need space, and I need time. We can talk sometime, but not today. Maybe not ever again. Just...stop calling me. Don't come here, and don't talk to Niall, Louis, Zayn, or Liam. Just...leave me alone," he took another step closer to me, his breath mixing with mine. 

"I-I-okay," I stuttered out, intoxicated with his close proximity. I took a huge risk of being rejected and tackled him into a tight hug. He let out a small breath and accepted my hug, but it was cold. His arms held me loosely as I clung tightly to him before pulling away and looking down at my feet. "I-I'm sorry," I said quietly before slowly backing away. "Please take care of yourself," I whispered, turning around quickly and heading back towards the street where I left my dad's car. 

"I love you," I called out suddenly, turning to look back at his mum's house, hoping he had heard me. 

But the door was already closed.  

A/n- Sorry this is so short, but it's an epilogue and I thought it was needed. The sequel to this book will be called Forgotten and it should be up within a couple of weeks!  I can't wait for you to see an insight into more of Erin and Harry's relationship and story! Thanks so much for reading!