Another Suicidal Teenager.

Part 2

I walked in on my mother fighting with my brother.

"DO YOU MAKE MONEY DO YOU PAY FOR FOOD.?!?" My mother shouted angrily.

"NO BUT ATLEAST IM NOT A DRUNK FUCKING UP WITH YOUR DAUGHTERS HEAD!" My brothers words stabbed me in the heart.

Next thing I heard was a slap and it sounded like it hurt. My brother Zach just hopped in to his car and drive off. My mother had a bit of a drinking problem on weekends she doesn't know how much she's hurting me by what she does. I admit when we go out to Walmart or some shit I take advantage sometimes. My mom chugged down her last but of beer and crashed on the couch. I was left there alone.

I just grabbed my iPod and started listening to music. 'Keep Holding On' by: Avril Lavigne started playing. I was in tears.

'You're not alone together we stand

ill be by your side you know ill take your hand

when it gets cold and it feels like the end

there's no place to go you know I won't give in. You know I won't give in.

Keep holding on. Cause you know we'll make it through will make it through.

Just stay strong cause you know I'm here for you I'm here for you.

There's nothing you can say there's nothing you can do

There's no other way when it comes to the truth so

Keep holding on

Cause you know we'll make it through. Well make it through.

You're so far away

I wish you were here

Before its to late this could all disappear

Before the doors close and it comes to an end.

With you by my side I will fight and defend.

Ill fight and defend ill fight and defend Yeah, Yeah.

Keep holding on. Cause you know we'll make it through will make it through.

Just stay strong cause you know I'm here for you I'm here for you.

There's nothing you can say there's nothing you can do

There's no other way when it comes to the truth so

Keep holding on

Cause you know we'll make it through. Well make it through.'

I don't remember the rest because I fell asleep. I had a dreamless sleep. Tomorrow was Sunday just one more day.

*Monday*

I got up and did my daily routine for school. I went in to the kitchen for some cereal. I poured the milk into the bowl and some cereal too. When I went to go get a spoon I dropped a knife nearly stabbing my foot. Something triggered inside me. I wanted to cut so bad at that moment. Just a little

Nothing major. I gripped the knife in my palm and aimed for my left arm slowly gliding the ridged blade across my tan skin. Almost immediately blood poured from the cut. A tear shed from my right eye. Why was I cutting Again. I promise Vanessa I wouldn't cut anymore. I guess I broke that promise the minuet the blade touched my skin. I now had a huge gash on my arm that I needed to cover up fast. The bus will be here in 5 minuets. I put on my Jordan's and a blue striped sweater grabbing my backpack I was out the door.

Right on time too. The bus was here. Ugh I wasn't in for the shit I was about to face. Fuck My Life.

"Laura over here!" Vanessa called. I went to go sit by her but the bus moved and I almost fell on to my friend Ashley. The Reffie bitch of. Course had to say shit. "GIRL YOU ALMOST CRUSHED ASHLEY! WATCH IT BRO!" She said with a annoying Cuban voice she thought was cute. "LISTEN YOU REFFIE ASS BITCH SHUT THE FUCK UP LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE BEFORE WE START TO HAVE PROBLEMS!" I shouted the bus filled with my echo. Lazaro (Bus Driver)

Started yelling some shit in Spanish I really didn't fucking care. Arriving at school and I'm already In a bad fucking mood.

I was greeted with some 'hellos' and hugs. I just brushed them off putting a fake smile on my face. Trying to get people to Fuck off.

Sitting in the corner of the school I see Dexter walking towards me. A smile spread across my face. I even blushed a bit. I wanted to tell him. I really did. I had a bit of a crush on Dexter since last year. But one problem. He's dating my best friend. Nigeria. I would never tell her how I felt about him but I wish I could. "Hey Laura." He said sitting next to me.

"Hey Dexter"

"What's up you seem lonely"

"No just thinking"

"About what"

"Stuff"

"We'll have you seen Nigeria"

There he goes talking about Nigeria. I kinda got annoyed when he would talk about her. But, I really shouldn't care that's his girlfriend and she's my best friend. I wish he would notice me. But, I'm just another friend to him.

"No I haven't seen her sorry." I said annoyed.

"Oh alright we'll I have to go"

"Oh Course you do" I muttered

"What?

"Nothing just go"

And with that he walked away. I'm just so done. I'm like the only person in the school with no boyfriend. Sometimes I wish I could Die. I always wished I could Die. Ill be free of all worry. I know what I'm going to do this weekend.

*Journal Entry*

I sit in pain asking for an exit. I have old scars and new scars. This world is too much to handle.Theres so many reasons to stay but, I choose the reasons to leave. I squint as the hard rusty razor glides across my skin. I hear a knock on the bathroom door I start to panic. Quickly hiding the razor and cleaning the blood of my arm and I flushed the toilet to make it seem that I went to the bathroom then I scurry back to my bedroom and stare at the ceiling until I fall into a dreamless sleep.

~Laura xx