STICKY NOTES

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It's been two weeks since I've entered this house, I love this place. Everything looks perfect in terms of residence. I have my own privacy and I don't need anything extra in my room. Well except for a diwan which I can place near the window and sleep peacefully. It does take time for me to adjust to this place, as I am so used to sharing my stuffs, especially the room and have been a submissive person, I never had a voice to even open my mouth and say something on any issue. That reminds me of my roommate who refuses to have a conversation with me, because "I invaded his privacy" (that's what he claims and I have seen him grumbling to his friends). All I know about him is that his name is Tahir and he is from Delhi. He came here to become an actor. In case there is something to talk, there is only one way we converse and that does not involve WhatsApp nor text messages. Surprisingly Mr. actor has something called "sticky notes" and I have a bunch of them in different colours and writes his message and sticks near the telephone/fridge. My life hasn't even started and I've already acquired a hater, I should get used to an open hatred behaviour as I was fooled by sweet talks and buttered statements to get the work done. Just like Malhotra uncle said, this guy he barely stays at home and wanders a lot. So, it's just me and my thesis papers.

While the house life is just like living in a 1950's black and white movie, everything is communicated via notes and there is no direct communication, college isn't anything less than that of a vacuum room, the point is I never made friends there except for maybe Madhu, who was a late entrant to the class. My classmates barely even talk, they are way too serious and always are into the books. Madhu is getting used to this new atmosphere as she was in abroad all these years and out of anywhere in this world, she chose Mumbai to finish her masters. The jetlag is tiring, so she doesn't come to classes mostly. I update her on what happens there. However, there is one place where I feel good visiting every time, the chapel at the end of the street. Before I go to class and after finishing classes I go there and sit for an hour. It gives me a sense of relief there and I feel less desolated. Aunt Cathy and Jane occasionally call and ensure everything is alright. Ever since my visit to Mumbai, I've never received any sort of calls from my folks in Chennai. It's like they banished my name from the family. The truth hurts but it is the reality. All these shouldn't matter as it was my decision, to get out of Chennai and explore this world. Sometimes my classmates from college, message to bring me back and I pretend I am okay with this city of dreams.

I get back home after a long day and find a sticky note from Mr. Actor that he won't be in town for a week and will be returning the next Sunday. With days passing, it is getting tough being lonely in this silent place. His presence or absence is not changing anything. The decisions I made in haste is definitely showing its effects. I shouldn't complain yet. After a long call with Madhu explaining her the lecture was enough to get over the time. Whilst having my dinner which is definitely not the cup noodles, I made myself a paneer roll and green chutney, to give me the energy to complete the assignment paper. I get a call, from Malhotra Uncle saying there's a courier for us, and while I saw an address it was for my roommate/actor. It labelled urgent but until he comes back, I can't really open. And that person hasn't given his contact number to call him I don't know where in the world he is. He said it'll take a week to come back. So, I just kept it aside. I was tired, and yet the work is incomplete. There is only one way I can finish it. wake up early in the morning and write the remaining part of that.

And that is how my schedule is- wake up early in the morning around 5.30 am, get ready for college, prepare the food and keep the most likely to be spoiled ones in the fridge, checking if at all I locked everything properly, running to the auto stand, take a share auto to Kherwadi station and train to Guru Tegh Bahadur Nagar Railway Station and then to college, I wish I could take a cab or an auto from my place to the college, but then that's where you need to be stingy. It reminded me of the times I had this internship in my hometown when I was running out of money and I had to travel the hard way. It was tiresome, but it had so many memories. Once I find a suitable part time job, to cope up with these expenses, then maybe I can get a second-hand two-wheeler and ride all the way to the college without getting cramped up in that tiny space in the trains.

But there has to be something I can talk to this man, about something. I kinda expected it would be like how Joey and Chandler bonded instantly during Baywatch. Its too much to even think of but is it too much to ask for? For a good roommate if not for a friend. Funny how a sitcom creates unrealistic expectations on the desired life and when we don't get what we wish for, we get disappointed. Well I'm glad I learnt this lesson the hard way. 

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⏰ Last updated: Oct 08, 2020 ⏰

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