Anchor {h.s}

three **

I nodded. "It was all right. I worked with a new cook today."

"Yeah?" He asked as he took a quick look in my direction.

"Mhm, his name is Niall and he already knows that you're a pervert," I informed him through chuckles.

He smiled. "I hope he's not expecting anything from me, because that's not my thing."

"Isn't it?" I teased him.

"You would know," he retorted.

I snorted at his implication and Harry chuckled before taking my hand in his. I tensed for a second but relaxed as soon as I realized what was happening. This was something that both made my heart melt and frustrated me. It created such an ambiguous reaction inside. It warmed my heart because, even if it was small, it was a gesture of affection. It sometimes made me wonder what Harry felt for me, but that questioning never lasted long, because I knew Harry, I knew him better than anyone, and Harry didn't love.

Harry lived to the extremes. Because he was broken on the inside, he always searched for a way to escape his reality. Most times, he would over do it. He would drink too much, smoke too much or fuck too hard. There was never a balance with him. It was all or nothing. He hated himself with passion and loved no one at all.

Still, I let him hold my hand, because if it meant nothing to him, it meant everything to me.

We soon arrived at his place and my heart started to beat faster with anticipation. Harry released my hand and turned off his engine. He opened his door and went around his car to come and open mine.

"Why are you being so chivalrous?" I joked. "Are you expecting a blowjob?"

He smirked and took my hand in his. "With you? Always. You love it."

I smiled and looked at the ground. He was right, I enjoyed giving oral as much as I enjoyed receiving it. Seeing him come undone was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen and it was even better when it happened because of my mouth.

Suddenly, but only for a second, playful Harry was gone as he mumbled, "and I have a lot to apologize for," in reply to my previous question.

He started walking ahead of me and I was thankful that he couldn't see my pained expression. His words wounded me as they reminded me what this whole thing meant to him.

We walked into his apartment and I put down my bag. My mood had darkened a little after my realization but I tried to ignore it.

"Are you okay?" Harry asked as he took my face between his hands so that I would look at him.

I put on a smile, "Yeah, I just- can I use your shower?"

I looked down as I saw sadness taking over Harry's eyes. He had caught up to my mood but said nothing about it. "Sure, you know where it is."

I nodded and headed to the bathroom. I started the water and calmly took off my clothes. I hated the fact that I started to think about things that way. Harry was in such a good mood and I had to ruin it by overthinking things. I hoped the shower would fix it.

Once the water was hot enough, I stepped into the shower and started to wash my hair and body. I took my time, massaging my scalp as I applied the shampoo to calm me down.

As I rinsed the soap off of my body, I heard the bathroom door open. At first, I thought that Harry just came in to take a piss, but as I heard his belt hit the floor, I knew that his intentions were different. The sound of the shower curtain opening made me look behind but when I saw Harry stepping into the shower, I turned back around.