But despite her usual appetite, Soomin pursed her lips together and shook her head.

"I'll throw it up anyways, so there's no point."

Donghyuck sucked in a deep breath and the girl already expected him to rant once again about getting herself killed, but instead, he just calmly put the tray on the bedside table. His eyes then found hers again, and for once, they didn't seem so harsh and cold.

"Fine. Eat it after sleeping. You'll feel better." 

Soomin blinked a couple of times surprised, but appreciated the gesture and she relaxed all her tense muscles. She continued staring up at him, Donghyuck doing the same thing as they just stood there in silence.

"When was the first time you killed someone?" The girl blurted out unwillingly.

Donghyuck froze, his expression falling even more than it had been before. He didn't say anything for a few moments, looking for an answer or an excuse.

Finally he sighed, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his sweatpants. "Around when I was 17."

"That's so young..." Soomin whispered, looking up at him with pity.

"Yeah, I guess."
"Did you feel guilty about it?"

"Of course I did." Donghyuck admitted, eyes drifting off somewhere where Soomin didn't see. "Extremely guilty. And I still do to this day. But as the years go by, you learn to cope with it. But it never goes away."

The girl bit her lip, looking up at him as he seemed lost in his own, painful memories. 

"But that's besides the point." He cleared his throat. "Go to sleep."

Donghyuck turned and took a step away, but was interrupted as a hand shock out to grab his wrist. He turned, about to tell her to go to sleep again, but was met with tearful, begging eyes staring right back into his.

"Sing me a lullaby." Soomin whispered.

"We've been through this." The boy sighed. "I won't be-"

"I feel like I'm going to have a panic attack." She interrupted him, her voice now filled with desperation. "There's this lullaby that my mom used to sing which always calmed me down. Please sing it for me, I'm begging you." 

Donghyuck pulsed his lips together, contemplating. One side was telling him to just say no and walk away, the other pulled him to do as she wished. He hadn't sung in front of anyone for two years now.

Finally, the boy sighed. "Fine. What is it?" 

"Do you know 'A cottage on an isle'?"

Donghyuck bit down at his bottom lip. Out of all the songs Soomin could have chosen, she chose the single one he did not want to even hear.

He was about to refuse, but something in the girl's eyes made him contemplate again. His heart somehow softened and he sighed, sitting down on the edge of the bed by her feet.

"I'm only doing this once, okay?"

Soomin bit her bottom lip with a small smile on it, bringing the covers up to her chin as she tucked herself into comfort.

Donghyuck cleared his throat a couple of times, quickly humming the easy melody to himself before taking a deep breath to begin singing.

"𝘊𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴, 𝘮𝘺 𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘍𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘰𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘰𝘸 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘢 𝘯𝘦𝘸 𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘏𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘦, 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘷𝘦 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘍𝘰𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘥𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘮𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘧𝘢𝘳 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺 

𝘈𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘭𝘢𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘔𝘢𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘥𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘮𝘴 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘮𝘺 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘓𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘯 𝘤𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘦, 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘰𝘯 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘍𝘰𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘺 𝘭𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘷𝘦

𝘛𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘭𝘥 𝘪𝘴 𝘤𝘳𝘶𝘦𝘭 𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦'𝘴 𝘢 𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘦𝘴 𝘐𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘬𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘥𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘴"

Donghyuck took in a deep breath, something in his throat clogging up his airways, barely letting him sing. His voice had been weak, quiet and unusually soft, but that was because this lullaby just forced something inside of him to break. His mouth dried up at the tons of memories flooding his head.

As he was about to try his best and continue, his eyes found their way towards the sleeping girl's face. She was already vast asleep, quiet and calm breaths escaping her pink, chapped lips. Strands of her soft, black hair laid on top of her shut eyes, her nose twitching slightly as she tried to get them off. 

Donghyuck swallowed hard, their similarities arising once more, and he just couldn't take it anymore.

That's why he got up and quietly left.

This story was at the top of the nct hashtag

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This story was at the top of the nct hashtag... oh my god I love y'all so so so much

Also, I'm so sorry for not updating often, and I won't be making much excuses but here they are simplified: work, going back to school, competition

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