Written in the Stars

pro

three years ago

"Hallie, you should do it." He told me convincingly, conviction coursing through his voice.

"But-"

"No buts, it's an amazing opportunity, not to mention one you only have for this summer. I don't want us to be the reason you say no." His voice softened at the end, filling with a mix of compassion and understanding.

"I-" I cut myself off. I knew he was right. I had wanted to go to Italy since I was a child, who hadn't? But at the same time, I wanted to see Connor. The two weeks we'd spent together at Christmas, blissful though they may have been, weren't the two months we would get to spend together in the summer. And going to Italy wasn't the promise of next summer Connor had given me last year.

I had debated long with myself about even telling Connor about the possibility of me going to Italy. I'd known about the opportunity for about a month, ever since my Maritime Studies professor offered it to me, telling me I showed initiative and promise.

I only had the end of today left to make the decision.

A part of me knew the only reason I had waited so long and brought it up to Connor was because deep down inside, I wanted to go. I wanted to go, but I didn't, because going meant leaving Connor.

"It won't be the same without you, but I know we can make it. What's one more year, right?" Connor asked lightly, pushing what I could tell was an artificial hope into his voice. This year had been harder than we both had ever imagine.

A promise to call or text each other every day turned into every week, turned into every two weeks as the year sped up and our professors dropped more assignments and essays on us.

"One more year," I repeated, chuckling slightly to try and disperse the tears that were quickly clouding my vision.

One more year...

+++

two years ago

I picked up the phone, set it down, picked it up again, and repeated the process about fifty more times in addition to the hundreds I'd already done. No matter how many times I picked up the damn phone, it never got any easier. The clenching around my heart never eased, and the right moment never came and never would come.

It ended up being her that called me.

"Hey," I answered breathlessly as I raised the phone to my ear. I cleared my throat, shook my head, and tried again, "Hey." I repeated, my voice dropping about half an octave.

"Connor," her voice sounded in my ear, with the slightest robotic tone from the transmission through the phone. Her voice had a slight cheer to it, a happiness that mine usually possessed during our calls, but not this one, and I knew that her happy tone wouldn't last for much longer. "George said you wanted to talk..."

"Of course he did," I muttered under my breath, rolling my eyes. How was it that even thousands of miles away, that little shit was still giving me problems? Never mind the fact that him and I called or texted each other everyday, and he saw Hallie probably once a week because of the close proximity of their schools. "Did he now?" I asked, louder this time so she could hear me.

"Yeah," she replied, her voice trailing to a low hum at the end. "Umm, is it-"

"It's nothing bad- er, well." I interrupted quickly, cutting her off and hoping to ease the negative thoughts from her mind. "I umm, kind of signed up to go build schools in Africa."

"Connor, that's amazing!" She replied, her voice elated, happy for me, but there was a twist of sadness. She knew what was coming.

"I'll be gone the whole summer, and most of August too." I told her, holding my breath and waiting for her reaction.

"I umm, kind of figured." She replied, the happiness dropping out of her voice. I hated myself for it, I never wanted to be the reason of her pain, sadness, or suffering. I always wanted to be the reason for her smiles and laughter. "It'll be okay," She said, and I could tell she was forcing a smile on the other line.

"I'm sorry," I said quietly.

"Don't be," she replied on the other line.

We sat in silence, listening to the sound of each other breathing on the other line for a few moments.

"I'm sorry," I repeated.

This time she didn't answer. Nothing she said could ease the weight of my heart, and I think she realized that.

"I miss you," she spoke after another few moments of silence.

"I miss you too, Hal. More than anything," I replied, and I did. I had known for the past three years of my life now that she was the girl that I want to spend the rest of my life with. That at the end of every bad day, the thing that cheers me up is the fact that I know we'll be together one day. I know that even though we aren't together now, one day, we will be... because Hallie and I are written in the stars.

+++

one year ago

+++

present

"Dude, you know you're both gonna be home for the summer this year, right?" He asked, his voice was sharp, loud, and clear- almost metallic because of the static from the poor connection of my phone.

"I know," I replied slowly, thoughtfully.

"First time you'll both be back since the summer we graduated," George said with a laugh. 

I wanted to tell him to shut up, sometimes he could be so oblivious- except he wasn't oblivious, he was really damn smart. I knew he was saying it purposefully to see the reaction I had to his statement. I was sure it wouldn't be the one he wanted though.

"Things are different now." I said, in the same slow thoughtful tone as before. 

I would always love Hallie. She would always be my first love, but things had changed. We hadn't spoken in about a year and a half, ever since that night. Maybe we were meant to be together, maybe we weren't, but I knew I would never stop loving her.

"No," George countered, "Things have the chance to be different now. Don't waste it." He said, and the line went dead. The asshole had hung up on me.

Thoughts churned through my head as I set my phone down, thinking about what he'd said. The chance to be different. Maybe the chance to be different was a chance for us to finally be together, but to do it right this time, to make it last. The chance to prove the stars right...

surprise... guess who?